Thread: 1 Samuel 18:27... Say it with foreskins Board: Chapter & Worse / Ship of Fools.


To visit this thread, use this URL:
http://forum.ship-of-fools.com/cgi-bin/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic;f=76;t=000023

Posted by Simon (# 1) on :
 
Verse nominated by Pam Smith

"David and his men went out and killed two hundred Philistines. He brought their foreskins and presented the full number to the king so that he might become the king's son-in-law. Then Saul gave him his daughter Michal in marriage." (1 Samuel 18:27, in context)

Pam Smith comments: As the passage goes on to say that the Lord was with David, it seems he approved of killing 200 Philistines for their foreskins. I'm just really glad it's never cropped up in the lectionary when I've been preaching -- so far anyway! (To say nothing of the fact that Michal, his bride to be, loved him after he'd done it... what's wrong with a nice bunch of flowers and some chocolates?)

How much of a problem is this verse? Click "Vote Now" to cast your vote!

[ 03. September 2009, 19:29: Message edited by: Simon ]
 
Posted by Kelly Alves (# 2522) on :
 
Oh, how freaking cool would that be as a wedding lection.
 
Posted by Marvin the Martian (# 4360) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Kelly Alves:
Oh, how freaking cool would that be as a wedding lection.

Do NOT tempt me [Snigger]
 
Posted by Bullfrog. (# 11014) on :
 
I was tempted to start a thread a while back on David's incredible confusion about being God's chosen king and being a total jackass.

Might go back to the earlier Samuel passage about how kings are a really really bad idea.
 
Posted by jacobsen (# 14998) on :
 
It was sheer wasteful laziness, really. Foreskins could have been gathered without killing anyone. The involuntary donors might have had to be tied down, though. [Eek!]
 
Posted by episcolib (# 13785) on :
 
The author of I Samuel shows a great sense of humor, here. [Devil]
 
Posted by Lyda*Rose (# 4544) on :
 
Simon:
quote:
Pam Smith comments: As the passage goes on to say that the Lord was with David, it seems he approved of killing 200 Philistines for their foreskins. I'm just really glad it's never cropped up in the lectionary when I've been preaching -- so far anyway! (To say nothing of the fact that Michal, his bride to be, loved him after he'd done it... what's wrong with a nice bunch of flowers and some chocolates?)
Funny that Michal approved of a bunch of bloody, human tissue bits as courting gifts, yet thought her husband dancing in his skivvies was undignified:
quote:
As the ark of the LORD came into the city of David, Michal the daughter of Saul looked out of the window and saw King David leaping and dancing before the LORD, and she despised him in her heart. 2Sam 6:16
She probably whined to him, "You never bring me any enemy foreskins anymore!" too, after he'd spent a hard day on the throne. Marriage changes everything. [Frown]
 
Posted by mousethief (# 953) on :
 
She: "You don't bring me foreskins"
He: "You don't like me naked"
Both: "Anymore..."

with apologies to Neil Diamond
 
Posted by Lyda*Rose (# 4544) on :
 
And Babs. [Big Grin]
 
Posted by BWSmith (# 2981) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by episcolib:
The author of I Samuel shows a great sense of humor, here. [Devil]

^ this.
 
Posted by leo (# 1458) on :
 
Thankfully, this verse does not appear in the Revised Common lectionary - the preceding verses appear on the feast of S. Joseph and stop at verse 16.
 
Posted by ThinkČ (# 1984) on :
 
It's difficult to know why you'd want 200 foreskins really, but I suppose if your religion forbids you from making real pork scratchings, they might be turned into an acceptable substitute.

[ 31. January 2010, 07:56: Message edited by: ThinkČ ]
 
Posted by kankucho (# 14318) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by ThinkČ:
It's difficult to know why you'd want 200 foreskins really

It's a very versatile gift. You could stitch them together to make a nice handbag. Then just give the bag a quick rub and it turns into a suitcase.

[Big Grin]

[ 01. February 2010, 07:38: Message edited by: kankucho ]
 
Posted by Kelly Alves (# 2522) on :
 
That was truly unforgiveable.

[Big Grin]

[Overused]
 
Posted by Lyda*Rose (# 4544) on :
 
It's a keeper. [Biased]
 


© Ship of Fools 2016

Powered by Infopop Corporation
UBB.classicTM 6.5.0