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Source: (consider it)
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Thread: Heaven: Future history of the Ship
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Chapelhead*
Ship’s Photographer
# 1143
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Posted
Fr Dyfrig has made a start on drawing up the future history of the Ship over in The Styx
quote:
Originally posted by Dyfrig:
September 2003 - new poster arrives. Within 6 posts she has offended thirteen racial minorities, the gay community and Wood. Four days are lost to the ensuing arguments. 27 Heaven regulars threaten to leave because of the heartache involved. pyx_e insults Nightlamp.
February 2004 - Simon asks for money
May 2004 - apprentice starts "Mornington Crescent" game in Heaven.
January 2005 - further changes to board software mean Ship is down for two weeks
February 2005 - Ship goes back on line. Fiddleback starts thread in Styx complaining about how things were better before the change. His fourteen multiple posts of the same message have to be manually removed because he has managed to crash the system.
August 2005 - Simon asks for money
I think we should carry this on:
May 2008. It is revealed that 28% of Shipmates are actually computer programs, with entirely predictable responses to any thread subject. The longest single thread in the Ship’s history, running to 128 pages, is a discussion on which 28% they are.
September 2014. An Apprentice starts the 784th thread on the subject “Why is everyone so beastly to each other in Hell, I thought this was supposed to be a Christian site”. From her secret underground bunker deep in the Everglades, Erin launches a quantum torpedo. 13 seconds later the Apprentice is vaporized.
January 2244. To mark the 300th anniversary of his birth, the Ship begins a year-long series of extracts from the journal of Archbishop Jensen. A thread is started on the subject of whether the Episcopal Church should reunite with the much larger Jensenist Chruch, with a clear majority of Episcopalians on-board in favour on the grounds that as Archbishop Jensen never left the Anglican Church he still counts as ‘one of us’.
[Thread title edited for Limbo]
[ 23. September 2003, 03:11: Message edited by: RuthW ]
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Benedikt Gott Geschickt!
Posts: 7082 | From: Turbolift Control. | Registered: Aug 2001
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Orb
Eye eye Cap'n!
# 3256
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Posted
Of course, Jesus is coming back tomorrow - so that's all speculative (and highly blasphemous) fantasy... ![[Wink]](wink.gif)
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“You cannot buy the revolution. You cannot make the revolution. You can only be the revolution. It is in your spirit, or it is nowhere.” Ursula K. Le Guin, The Dispossessed
Posts: 5032 | From: Easton, Bristol | Registered: Aug 2002
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starbelly
but you can call me Neil
# 25
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Rob - ID crisis InDiE KiD:
Of course, Jesus is coming back tomorrow - so that's all speculative (and highly blasphemous) fantasy...
I had a batty aunt who was convinced this was true, and refused to ask me what I wanted to do "when I grew up"!
Anyway...
August 2004 Half the Hosts resign over an issue involving ChrisT, Erin's cat and a large bathtub. "fallen" hosts set up rival site called The Foolery, it's server closes them down within a week of going online, due to a loophole in Hungarian law.
December 2004 The Archbishop joins the site under the cunning name "archbishop", he quickly becomes host of Small Fire, despite thinking it is a board to discuss minor arson attacks.
March 2005 The suprise marriage of two shipmates. A shock to all as one was thought to be gay and the other one turns out to be a preacher on Premier Radio.
Neil
Posts: 6009 | From: High Wycombe, Buckinghamshire. | Registered: May 2001
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Chapelhead*
Ship’s Photographer
# 1143
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Posted
November 2005 In time for the Christmas rush, the computer game SimShip is launched. With a limited level of resources the player has to build a Site of Christian Unreast, purchasing articles, competitions, message boards and hosts along the way, while avoiding disasters such as trolls, server crashes and sleep deprivation.
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Benedikt Gott Geschickt!
Posts: 7082 | From: Turbolift Control. | Registered: Aug 2001
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Chorister
Completely Frocked
# 473
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Posted
July 2005: having run out of ideas, the TV cameras move in on 'Big Christian Brother' - a reality show beamed live into your living room 24/7 from the Ship of Fools St. Sim's Shipmeet.
July 2010: Erin breaks the sound barrier with her 100,000th post, and the ship goes down for a week while it is all sorted out. Smudgie follows a close second with 98,873 and Dolphy with 98,762. Meanwhile, Chorister is trailing in 100th place on 38,134, having quite run out of things to say
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Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.
Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001
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starbelly
but you can call me Neil
# 25
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Chorister:
Chorister is trailing in 100th place on 38,134, having quite run out of things to say
I somehow doubt that.
June 2007 The Ship makes a takeover bid of Fish.co.uk, Premier Online and (for some odd reason) beerdirect.co.uk.
Ship shares soar and Simon retires to his villa in Spain.
Neil
Posts: 6009 | From: High Wycombe, Buckinghamshire. | Registered: May 2001
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Chorister
Completely Frocked
# 473
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Posted
August 2009 - the media silly season is in full swing with front page news in every major newspaper about Gadgets for God and latest sightings of weeping Ship's portals.
December 2010 - Bill Gates throws a tantrum because in a 'most famous computer personality of all time' national TV opinion poll, Erin Etheridge scores more votes than he does.
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Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.
Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001
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Stephen
Shipmate
# 40
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Chapelhead:
January 2244. To mark the 300th anniversary of his birth, the Ship begins a year-long series of extracts from the journal of Archbishop Jensen. A thread is started on the subject of whether the Episcopal Church should reunite with the much larger Jensenist Chruch, with a clear majority of Episcopalians on-board in favour on the grounds that as Archbishop Jensen never left the Anglican Church he still counts as ‘one of us’.
But,Fr.Chapelhead, you must surely realise a lot can happen in 240 odd years. By then the Jensenist Continuing Anglican Church will have instituted the use of 1549, the use of the chasuble,dalmatic and tunicle will be compulsory on a daily basis as every Eucharist will be choral and celebrated daily.There will also be a daily Choral Mattins and Evensong.This will be possible by the generous bequests made by Evangelical Jensenists throughout the generations.
The question the Episcopal Church ie those Anglican churches that didn't take part in the Schism of 2029 will have to address is whether it is high enough up the candle to re-unite with the Jensenist church
Rome will have reopened discussions with the Presbyterians and the Jensenist Church will have had serious in-depth discussions with the Orthodox.Indeed they will be united with the Orthodox around 2300
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Best Wishes
Stephen
'Be still,then, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the nations and I will be exalted in the earth' Ps46 v10
Posts: 3954 | From: Alto C Clef Country | Registered: May 2001
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Erin
Meaner than Godzilla
# 2
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Chapelhead:
From her secret underground bunker deep in the Everglades, Erin launches a quantum torpedo. 13 seconds later the Apprentice is vaporized.
This will actually be ready next week. ![[Smile]](smile.gif)
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Commandment number one: shut the hell up.
Posts: 17140 | From: 330 miles north of paradise | Registered: Mar 2001
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Chorister
Completely Frocked
# 473
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Posted
1 April 2006: the world is shattered to discover the truth that the Bible was actually written by SteveTom.
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Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.
Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001
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starbelly
but you can call me Neil
# 25
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Chorister:
1 April 2006: the world is shattered to discover the truth that the Bible was actually written by SteveTom.
...and SteveTom is quite suprised himself, and has to move to a small cottage in the Mendip hills to escape all the media attention.
Neil
Posts: 6009 | From: High Wycombe, Buckinghamshire. | Registered: May 2001
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dyfrig
Blue Scarfed Menace
# 15
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Posted
August 2005: merseymike outed as member of Reform.
September 2006: Wood appointed Host of Hell. No-one notices.
January 2008: posters on Mystery Worship discover new boards called Purgatory, Hell and Kerygmania.
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"He was wrong in the long run, but then, who isn't?" - Tony Judt
Posts: 6917 | From: pob dydd Iau, am hanner dydd | Registered: Apr 2001
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dyfrig
Blue Scarfed Menace
# 15
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Posted
February 2001: new Party thread started in Heaven. Stoo kills himself. Coroner dramatically reaches verdict of "Provocation".
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"He was wrong in the long run, but then, who isn't?" - Tony Judt
Posts: 6917 | From: pob dydd Iau, am hanner dydd | Registered: Apr 2001
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Pyx_e
Quixotic Tilter
# 57
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Neil (starbelly):
[QUOTE]Originally posted by Rob - ID crisis InDiE KiD:
[qb] Of course, Jesus is coming back tomorrow - so that's all speculative (and highly blasphemous) fantasy...
I had a batty aunt who was convinced this was true, and refused to ask me what I wanted to do "when I grew up"!
______________________________________________
Now you have made me curious, what do you want to do when you grow up? ![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
P
[ 30. July 2003, 09:24: Message edited by: Pyx_e ]
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It is better to be Kind than right.
Posts: 9778 | From: The Dark Tower | Registered: May 2001
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Marvin the Martian
Interplanetary
# 4360
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Dyfrig:
February 2001: new Party thread started in Heaven. Stoo kills himself. Coroner dramatically reaches verdict of "Provocation".
Stoo's been dead for 2 and a half years! ![[Eek!]](eek.gif) The dead have risen and are hosting religious message boards!!!! ![[Paranoid]](graemlins/paranoid.gif) FLEE!!!!
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Hail Gallaxhar
Posts: 30100 | From: Adrift on a sea of surreality | Registered: Apr 2003
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Eutychus
From the edge
# 3081
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Dyfrig:
August 2005: merseymike outed as member of Reform.
![[Killing me]](graemlins/killingme.gif)
I must confess this thought (or something like it) had already crossed my mind (sorry Mike )
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Let's remember that we are to build the Kingdom of God, not drive people away - pastor Frank Pomeroy
Posts: 17944 | From: 528491 | Registered: Jul 2002
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Pyx_e
Quixotic Tilter
# 57
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by IntellectByProxy:
I'm intrigued how you managed to edit that post and still stuff it up...
Its easy.
(you should have seen it before I edited it)
P
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It is better to be Kind than right.
Posts: 9778 | From: The Dark Tower | Registered: May 2001
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Jen.
Godless Liberal
# 3131
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Marvin the Martian:
quote:
Originally posted by Dyfrig:
February 2001: new Party thread started in Heaven. Stoo kills himself. Coroner dramatically reaches verdict of "Provocation".
Stoo's been dead for 2 and a half years! The dead have risen and are hosting religious message boards!!!! FLEE!!!!
bugger. I thought I'd left the necrophilia behind and moved on.
J
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Was Jenny Ann, but fancied being more minimal.
Posts: 5318 | From: Manchester, England | Registered: Aug 2002
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Orb
Eye eye Cap'n!
# 3256
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Posted
February 2030: The Ark 27 debuts. Mixed reviews in the Christian media and the Church Times declares that it "no longer has the cult following it had for the first 26 times". The contestants include 10 Orthodox priests, a nun and the Archbishop of Canterbury (in a sideways swipe at the sex-obsessed Big Brother 30).
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“You cannot buy the revolution. You cannot make the revolution. You can only be the revolution. It is in your spirit, or it is nowhere.” Ursula K. Le Guin, The Dispossessed
Posts: 5032 | From: Easton, Bristol | Registered: Aug 2002
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Stoo
Mighty Pirate
# 254
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Marvin the Martian:
Stoo's been dead for 2 and a half years! The dead have risen and are hosting religious message boards!!!! FLEE!!!!
Damn. I thought no-one had noticed.
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This space left blank
Posts: 5266 | From: the director of "Bikini Traffic School" | Registered: May 2001
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Jen.
Godless Liberal
# 3131
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Posted
I did wonder where the putrid decay smell was coming from, but thought you just needed a stronger deodorant.
J
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Was Jenny Ann, but fancied being more minimal.
Posts: 5318 | From: Manchester, England | Registered: Aug 2002
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dyfrig
Blue Scarfed Menace
# 15
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Posted
You mean 2001 isn't in the future? My calender must be slow.
[stomps away muttering something about discrimination against people who can't type, which is mildly hypocritical because he's probably one of the few people on the Ship who were given formal typing lessons as a child but that's not the point. Bastards.]
[ 30. July 2003, 11:37: Message edited by: Dyfrig ]
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"He was wrong in the long run, but then, who isn't?" - Tony Judt
Posts: 6917 | From: pob dydd Iau, am hanner dydd | Registered: Apr 2001
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Robert Porter-Miller
Tiocfaidh Separabit
# 1459
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Chorister:
July 2010: Erin breaks the sound barrier with her 100,000th post, and the ship goes down for a week while it is all sorted out. Smudgie follows a close second with 98,873 and Dolphy with 98,762. Meanwhile, Chorister is trailing in 100th place on 38,134, having quite run out of things to say
Run out of things to say Chorister - I don't think so - I think I'll break the 100 000 landmark before anyone else actually. I'll see if I can do it by Christmas 2005
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It's a beautiful day - don't let it get away - Bono and the boys
Let's all "Release Some Tension"
Posts: 1231 | From: Washington, D.C. | Registered: Oct 2001
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da_musicman
Shipmate
# 1018
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Posted
October 3087-The Ship is designated a International Heritage site and a preservation order is slapped on it.
November 3087-The Ship runs aground due to the antiquated software's inability to cope with the influx of virtual tourists.
December 3088-Simon's head in a jar asks for money.
[ 31. July 2003, 20:20: Message edited by: da_Musicman ]
Posts: 3202 | From: The Dreaming | Registered: Jul 2001
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flutterpink
Shipmate
# 4567
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Posted
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"I'd rather have a minute of something wonderful than a lifetime of nothin special." Steel Magnolias
Posts: 358 | From: nacogdoches | Registered: May 2003
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Chorister
Completely Frocked
# 473
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Posted
Jan 3089 - Ship's hold is finally cracked open by bounty hunters..... and half a million mutated fluffy bunnies hop out, closely followed by a bladder on a stick.
(nothing new there then)
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Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.
Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001
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ChastMastr
Shipmate
# 716
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Posted
In the year 2525... if Erin's still alive... if Simon can survive... we may fiiiiiiiiind...
Apologies to Zager and Evans.
Now that song is in my head. I hope you're all happy.
David
loves this thread, just discovered it, don't let it die
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My essays on comics continuity: http://chastmastr.tumblr.com/tagged/continuity
Posts: 14068 | From: Clearwater, Florida | Registered: Jul 2001
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Icklicus Angelicus
Shipmate
# 3588
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Posted
guys this thread has made my day. Tis one of the funniest in a long time - keep it up!
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LEGOLAS: The sky wears a film of gauze. The night air breathes infamy. Deceit weaves itself around my fingernails.
(mollyringwraith)
Posts: 763 | From: Oxford / Devon | Registered: Nov 2002
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The Rogue
Shipmate
# 2275
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Posted
October 2006
Another rival website arises called the Ship of Wallies. Six months later it is discovered to be a virtual sock puppet of the Ship of Fools itself which has reached a level of self-awareness only previously speculated about in rather far-fetched and cheap science fiction novels.
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If everyone starts thinking outside the box does outside the box come back inside?
Posts: 2507 | From: Toton | Registered: Feb 2002
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heathen mama
Shipmate
# 3767
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Posted
Jan 8, 2005
A record number of shipmates turn out for an Elvis Birthday Meet at Graceland. Having been planned for quite some time, all of the male shipmates, and a few of the gals, have had time to grow some impressive "later Elvis" sideburns. A svelte Kenwritez takes a break from his Atkins diet to indulge in some fried banana sandwiches. Extensive media coverage of the meet leads to a very rough battle for Heathen Mama's attention between George Clooney and Ben Affleck. Presleyterian is ordained Minister of Jimmy Choos. There is much dancing.
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I shaved my armpits for *this*?
Posts: 569 | From: the first state | Registered: Dec 2002
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Chapelhead*
Ship’s Photographer
# 1143
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Posted
March 2008 In a surprise move Simon announces that in future all Community Board Hosts will be directly elected by Shipmates.
In Heaven Smudgie is elected unopposed. Her first action is to start a thread entitled “Hostly pass the parcel”, in which all participants have to take it in turns to make a Hosting decision.
In Purgatory MerseyMike and Ender’s Shadow stand for election. After six weeks of campaigning voter apathy results in each of them receiving just two votes. It is decided that they will Host jointly, having to agree on all decisions taken.
In Hell Sarkycow receives 98% of the 42,000 votes cast. This raises questions for some, as there are only 29,000 registered Shipmates. Sarkycow’s explanation is “Pregnant chads count for two”. Amidst strong calls for the result to be declared void, Sarkycow appoints herself as an independent adjudicator for the recount, and she confirms the result.
In All Saints, the ‘dream team’ of Wood and Ken is elected, after campaigning on a manifesto promise to have the board renamed ‘All Souls’ and have it consist entirely of prayer requests for the dead.
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Benedikt Gott Geschickt!
Posts: 7082 | From: Turbolift Control. | Registered: Aug 2001
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The Black Labrador
Shipmate
# 3098
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Posted
2005 Merseymike posts a spoof prayer for his own exorcism on a Heaven thread. The prayer works, and he is outed as the vicar of a Reform church in Surrey who is married with five children. He is expelled from the ship.
2010 Erin, having spent three successive nights deleting troll posts, goes into a supermarket with a machine gun and kills 74 people. She is sentenced to death.
2015 Hundreds of shipmates travel to give evidence at Erin's appeal. The hearing lasts 12 months (of which nine months is devoted to hearing Father Gregory explain why the orthodox church is the one true church). Having seen shipmates in person, the judge reduces the death penalty to a $50 fine on grounds of diminished responsibility. The following day the judge goes into an Orthodox church with a machine gun. His trial is abandoned halfway through after Father Gregory is incarcerated at Guantanamo Bay on the grounds he is a major threat to national security.
2020 Anselmina becomes the C of E's first women bishop. But as a sop to traditionalists, she is only permitted to minister online.
2030 Jesuitical Lad, having practised what he preaches on contraception, celebrates the birth of his 43rd child.
2040 The 'Oh That Sarkycow' thread in heaven reaches page 23,346. The most recent acts are entitled "Sarkycow in the old people's home", "Sarkycow's hip replacement" and "Why hell was hotter in the old days".
2050 Following the introduction of passenger spaceships, the ship's first intergalactic tour starts. Jack the Lass volunteers to drive.
Posts: 629 | From: London | Registered: Jul 2002
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dolphy
Lady of Perpetual Responsiblity
# 862
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Posted
This is sheer brilliance, keep it up folks! ![[Not worthy!]](graemlins/notworthy.gif) This has to be one of the best threads ever.
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Looking forward to my rock moving closer again.
Posts: 15134 | From: my camper van | Registered: Jul 2001
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The Rogue
Shipmate
# 2275
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Posted
October 2014
A newbie calls Erin to Hell to protest about her treatment of the Newbie's comments on the re-election of Arnold Schwarzenegger as Governor of the 53rd state - Great Britain. Sadly this battered old planet can't cope with her response and the Solar System gets its second asteroid belt. At least the rest of us die laughing.
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If everyone starts thinking outside the box does outside the box come back inside?
Posts: 2507 | From: Toton | Registered: Feb 2002
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Marvin the Martian
Interplanetary
# 4360
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Posted
Funniest. Thread. Ever.
Now everyone else at work think's I've gone off the deep end coz I'm laughing so loud!
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Hail Gallaxhar
Posts: 30100 | From: Adrift on a sea of surreality | Registered: Apr 2003
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Chapelhead*
Ship’s Photographer
# 1143
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Posted
March 2017 Start of the Ship of Fools Civil War, also known as the War Between the Boards.
Precipitated by a decision by Hell to secede from the Ship, the underlying cause is the question of whether it is acceptable to use trolls as slaves. It is anticipated that the result will be a decisive defeat for Hell within six weeks. However Ultraspike is appointed Commander of the Hell Army, raises the standard of the Southern Cross and many troops rally to the cause. Four years of increasingly bitter fighting ensues, before a peace treaty is signed at the NightCourt House. Troops from Kerygmania and Small Fire go in as peacekeepers.
Despite the devastation of its economy, Hell spends the next 200 years claiming that it wasn’t defeated.
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Benedikt Gott Geschickt!
Posts: 7082 | From: Turbolift Control. | Registered: Aug 2001
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Nightlamp
Shipmate
# 266
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Posted
Feb 2013 Bishop Gene Robinson declares he is a creationist and is nominated as Archbishop of Canterbury.
The consequent threads about gay archbishops and evolution finally drive Alan Cresswell mad. He is only allowed to host the newly reformed Urban Myths board as long as he takes his meds.
April 2013 Sarkycow cons Simon into allowing her host of heaven. No new threads start in heaven. Erin investigates the situation and brings tomb out of retirement as a host of heaven. All threads in Heaven have their grammar sorted out. No one posts in heaven for two weeks.
May 2013 The experiment is declared a failure and the old heaven hosts are returned. Nightlamp and pyx_e start their 18th fight thread in hell but no one really notices since the responses are now to predictable for words.
June 2013 The month of changes; Rook comes out of the closet as a pentecostal christian and Fr Gregory converts to anglicanism. Merseymike says something nice about evangelicals. Wood becomes a thurifier and JL becomes a methodist.
July 2013 the ship takes a short holiday as it can't take the shock.
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I don't know what you are talking about so it couldn't have been that important- Nightlamp
Posts: 8442 | From: Midlands | Registered: May 2001
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Sir Kevin
Ship's Gaffer
# 3492
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Posted
January 2054: taking dictation from me, my nurses start a serious thread on The Archers in Purgatory to celebrate my 100th birthday. Being stone blind, barely ambulatory but still blessed with supeior hearing, hearing my favourite radio program from my penthouse flat a few blocks from the Beeb is the only thing that keeps me going! ![[Cool]](cool.gif) (bl**dy unreliable webcast made me realize it was time to move to the UK to be closer to the action years ago! ![[Snigger]](graemlins/snigger.gif) )
[UBB Code edited]
[ 07. August 2003, 19:14: Message edited by: Belisarius ]
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If you board the wrong train, it is no use running along the corridor in the other direction Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Writing is currently my hobby, not yet my profession.
Posts: 30517 | From: White Hart Lane | Registered: Oct 2002
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Alan Cresswell
Mad Scientist 先生
# 31
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Posted
March 2023 Martin PC not makes another return to the Ship. However, as his posts are understood by everyone an investigation is launched to find out who kidnapped him and assumed his identity. This uncovers a major sock-puppetry scam by which Smudgie had been manipulating threads to boost her post count.
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Don't cling to a mistake just because you spent a lot of time making it.
Posts: 32413 | From: East Kilbride (Scotland) or 福島 | Registered: May 2001
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Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32
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Posted
June 2004 The spectacularly bitter and scandalous divorce of Annie and Tom Day rocks SoF. The partisans of Annie post obscene polls concerning Tom, and vice versa. The TnT Board is deluged with relevant gossip, including discussions involving the alleged illegal use of chocolate and the degree of Sven the Moose's involvement. A cult predicting the eventual reconciliation of the two forms in Small Fire.
February 2005 A troll whose only response to anything is "he he he," "I know you are but what am I," or "Hootie and the Blowfish suck" infiltrates SoF. Struck powerless by this loophole, the Admins can only wring their hands and whimper piteously. The troll eventually wanders off to harass the Hootie and the Blowfish Official Web Site.
[Grammar corrected]
[ 07. August 2003, 22:03: Message edited by: Belisarius ]
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Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake.
Andrew Knoll
Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001
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Annie P
Ship's galley maid
# 3453
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Belisarius:
June 2004 The spectacularly bitter and scandalous divorce of Annie and Tom Day rocks SoF. The partisans of Annie post obscene polls concerning Tom, and vice versa. The TnT Board is deluged with relevant gossip, including discussions involving the alleged illegal use of chocolate and the degree of Sven the Moose's involvement. A cult predicting the eventual reconciliation of the two forms in Small Fire.
gosh! I never thought that was going to happen!
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Older now, but not necessarily wiser.
Posts: 3248 | From: stockton-on-tees | Registered: Oct 2002
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Sarkycow
La belle Dame sans merci
# 1012
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Posted
September 2004 The popcorn brigade start up on an argument thread in Hell, and the hellhosts snap. Nightlamp calls Louise, AlanC, Stoo, Chapelhead and Prof Yaffle to Hell. Sarkycow closes every thread in Hell, bar one entitled "Hi, I'm stupid, and my name's...". She then starts hacking into various log ons, and posting on the thread using their name. RooK begins following members of the popcorn brigade around the boards, and posting personal insults everytime they post elsewhere. And David? Well, David makes a extra post per month to show his dangerous mental state.
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“Just because your voice reaches halfway around the world doesn't mean you are wiser than when it reached only to the end of the bar.”
Posts: 10787 | Registered: Jul 2001
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Chorister
Completely Frocked
# 473
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Posted
December 2005: Gremlin streaks ahead, past Smudgie, Dolphy, Mousethief and Chorister, to be no. 2 in the post-count stakes, and hot on the heels of Erin (who is still fashionably unbeatable). Gremlin makes a pledge to increase from a post-average of 20 a day to 50 a day by the year 2007. The Department for Health issue a warning that excessive internet posting is more injurious to your health than smoking.
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Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.
Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001
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Nightlamp
Shipmate
# 266
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Posted
December 2008 Wood becomes host of heaven and no one notices.
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I don't know what you are talking about so it couldn't have been that important- Nightlamp
Posts: 8442 | From: Midlands | Registered: May 2001
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Schroedinger's cat
Ship's cool cat
# 64
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Posted
August 2010 The final book in the Harry Potter series is finally published. A heated discussion ensues in Heaven on whether the total destruction of Hogwarts ( and ensuing death of all teachers and students ) in an end-of-term prank gone wrong was really justified. Further discussion about how JKR could resurrect the characters for an eighth book.
Oct 2010 Wood returns from a 6 month break from hosting and posting. Nobody notices.
Nov 2010 The thread "Which shipmate would you like on top of your bonfire?" turns into the bitterest bitchfest yet. It seems that the US shipmates took it far more seriously than their UK counterparts.
Jan 2011 Erin breaks in the new year by randomly flaming newbies, just for the hell of it. Everyone else realises that it's going to be a great year.
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Blog
Music for your enjoyment
Lord may all my hard times be healing times
take out this broken heart and renew my mind.
Posts: 18859 | From: At the bottom of a deep dark well. | Registered: May 2001
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starbelly
but you can call me Neil
# 25
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Schroedinger's cat:
Nov 2010 The thread "Which shipmate would you like on top of your bonfire?" turns into the bitterest bitchfest yet. It seems that the US shipmates took it far more seriously than their UK counterparts.
Dec 2010 This threads spin-off "Which shipmate would you like on top of you?" takes a rather more disturbing turn.
Neil
Posts: 6009 | From: High Wycombe, Buckinghamshire. | Registered: May 2001
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dyfrig
Blue Scarfed Menace
# 15
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Posted
Feb 2005 Erin converts to Roman Catholicism and starts supporting Jesuitical Lad in arguments. Fiddleback starts thread called "Mountaineering" in MW but it turns out to be another thread about the Boy Curate. RooK establish list of the home addresses of all members of the popcorn brigade and begins arranging for their systematic elmination.
2010: second ship launched to investigate the monolith lying near Jupiter and find out what happened to the first mission.
August 2016; Wood becomes President of the United States. Nobody notices.
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"He was wrong in the long run, but then, who isn't?" - Tony Judt
Posts: 6917 | From: pob dydd Iau, am hanner dydd | Registered: Apr 2001
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Schroedinger's cat
Ship's cool cat
# 64
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Posted
April 2015 The annual return of TnT looks to be the same stuff as usual, until the appearance of two novel threads. Firstly, ChastMastr admits that he is really a lonely housewife, and would love to discuss frilly underwear. Then a new poster starts a heated debate with a thread on "Animals I have had sex with". The and ![[Projectile]](graemlins/puke2.gif) smilies work overtime.
September 2015 Some new smilies are introduced. With the advance to Holographic screens, one of these now actually reaches out to give you a hug. It is very popular with most people, although a number feel that they have to overuse the new smilie in response.
July 2017 Suspicions are raised by a group of new shipmates who quickly rise to the hosting ranks. After much debate, Erin finally admits that they are automated shipmates, who, with a few personality paramters set, can host and manage all of the boards. "I'd have thought shipmates called bot1 to bot10 would have been a dead giveaway" she says. Enders Shadow objects to having been flamed by a bot, which diverts the discussion in the most hellish ways.
October 2215 Wood becomes the first human president of the new intergalactic council. Nobody notices.
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Blog
Music for your enjoyment
Lord may all my hard times be healing times
take out this broken heart and renew my mind.
Posts: 18859 | From: At the bottom of a deep dark well. | Registered: May 2001
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