Ship of Fools: Circus: Coin a new churchy word

Thread: Circus: Coin a new churchy word Board: Limbo / Ship of Fools.

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Posted by Chorister (# 473) on :

Everyone knows we Christians already have a whole weird vocabulary unintelligible to the rest of the human race.....

Idea arising out of a post here - to make up new words for denominations, groups, activities within a church setting, and what they might mean.

Evangelicalista = an evangelical who serves great after-church coffee.

[ 12. February 2012, 01:07: Message edited by: Imaginary Friend ]

Posted by Bob Two-Owls (# 9680) on :

Eccleselastic - not being rigidly bound to any particular denomination or being in a state of church-shopping.

Posted by Birdseye (# 5280) on :

Worship-Warden: responsible for the distribution of the 'shakers' and tambourines to the small children in the one 'child friendly' noisy song at the family service... the rest of the time they patrol the pews during hymns ensuring an appropriate, though not excessive, engagement in praise activities.

Incensible: the state into which the operator of the thurible is rendered by excessively strong or illegal incense.

Crucible : The state in which a gathered congregation, individual or object, is ready to recieve a priestly blessing.

Posted by Bob Two-Owls (# 9680) on :

Playtheism (and Playganism) - falsely professing to be non-christian in order to shock parents/teachers or get out of Church on Sunday.

Posted by Baptist Trainfan (# 15128) on :

Organophobe - a modern worship-group leader who detests modern church music and makes their views known on every possible occasion. This, of course, has its opposite, the organoholic who can never get enough of said instrument in worship and believes that guitars are an abomination invented by the devil.

Posted by Caissa (# 16710) on :

Narcohomiletic= Sermonizing that causes the sudden onset of sleep.

Posted by Baptist Trainfan (# 15128) on :

Numpubum ("u" as in "pew") - an acute pain in the posterior caused by sitting for too long in a position of attentive listening.

Posted by Mockingale (# 16599) on :

Episcopale - the Anglican beverage of choice after a late choir rehearsal.

/I think I might have inspired this thread.

Posted by Baptist Trainfan (# 15128) on :

Mintercessions - someone sucking a sweet who has been unexpectedly "jumped on" to lead prayers.

Posted by Stetson (# 9597) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Bob Two-Owls:
Playtheism (and Playganism) - falsely professing to be non-christian in order to shock parents/teachers or get out of Church on Sunday.

Brilliant.

Posted by Pax Romana (# 4653) on :

Clergysequious - An adjective used to describe someone who becomes excessively reverent when in the presence of a priest, minister or nun.

Pax Romana

Posted by Dafyd (# 5549) on :

Altarnation: holding a family service on weeks 1 and 3 of the month and holy communion on weeks 2 and 4.

Posted by Amanda B. Reckondwythe (# 5521) on :

Whispers -- a worship service held in the late afternoon, characterized by inaudible prayers.

Posted by churchgeek (# 5557) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Baptist Trainfan:
Mintercessions - someone sucking a sweet who has been unexpectedly "jumped on" to lead prayers.

I'm pretty sure this word (mintercessions) also refers to the tin of Altoids kept in the vestry or choir room to save the rest of the choir or vested ministers from the breath of others.

Posted by piglet (# 11803) on :

East Anglican: An Episcopalian from Suffolk

Posted by Firenze (# 619) on :

Praiseworthy - aged congregant who never fails to say 'Hallelujah' loudly during the service.

Posted by Bob Two-Owls (# 9680) on :

Zenglican (and Zafulic*) - Someone eager to re-invent an eastern style meditative spirituality within their local parish church.

*a Zafu is the little round cushion that Zen practitioners sit on to meditate.

Posted by Chorister (# 473) on :

Altarnun is a real place in Creamtealand. But I like to think it means:

A person who has tried, but withdrawn from, taking full vows, but nevertheless finds herself drawn like a magnet to serving in the sanctuary of her local parish church.

We have an Altarnun in our church - do you?

Posted by Traveller (# 1943) on :

Choirister

One who sings in the choir, but probably shouldn't, as their singing causes all around to go "Ow!"

Posted by Chorister (# 473) on :

Interrectum Appointing a new vicar by the back door.

Posted by Pax Romana (# 4653) on :

Musicmudgeon - an opinionated, grumpy church organist

Pax Romana

[ 27. October 2011, 20:11: Message edited by: Pax Romana ]

Posted by Banner Lady (# 10505) on :

The scaristan is that dragon lady in church of the sacristy.

Posted by Lamb Chopped (# 5528) on :

We have kitchestans, which are a related species.

Posted by piglet (# 11803) on :

In our place, they're quite often the same DL ... [Eek!]

Posted by Chorister (# 473) on :

Evanjellyfish - Christians who make the faith look really attractive, but hide the nasty sting in the tale until it is too late to get away.

Posted by Dafyd (# 5549) on :

Thurberule A comic mishap involving an incense burner

Posted by Silver Faux (# 8783) on :

Implaquable: A congreation with an absolute rule against tacking memorial or "in dedication" plaques onto any of the Holy Hardware.

Posted by Dafyd (# 5549) on :

Indeacnant Reaction by junior clergy to the priest overstepping his authority

Indeacate Point out to the Presiding cleric where he or she is in the service

Posted by Og: Thread Killer (# 3200) on :

The Widow's Smite

The look kids get from the old grannies when they try to take money out of the offering plate

Posted by Paddy O'Furniture (# 12953) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Chorister:
Evanjellyfish - Christians who make the faith look really attractive, but hide the nasty sting in the tale until it is too late to get away.

I bow before your literary brilliance! [Overused]

Posted by Pax Romana (# 4653) on :

Sacribitcher

An older woman sacristy volunteer who gets extremely upset when someone puts one of the vessels on the wrong shelf.

Pax Romana

Posted by Baptist Trainfan (# 15128) on :

quote:
Originally posted by piglet:
East Anglican: An Episcopalian from Suffolk

This is in fact the actual title of the monthly magazine put out by the Diocese of St. Edmundsbury & Ipswich!

Posted by Baptist Trainfan (# 15128) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Amanda B. Reckondwythe:
Whispers -- a worship service held in the late afternoon, characterized by inaudible prayers.

Presumably the version used by the Church in Wales in called Mumbles - especially in the Swansea area. What the Welsh speakers might call it, I haven't a clue.

Posted by Chorister (# 473) on :

(Think I've seen this one on the ship somewhere before - but this is the place for it):

Anglocathoholic person (usually male) addicted to incense, lots of candles, gin and dressing up.

Posted by Dafyd (# 5549) on :

Beginning How anglo-catholics start a meeting.

Posted by piglet (# 11803) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Baptist Trainfan:

quote:
Originally posted by piglet:
East Anglican: An Episcopalian from Suffolk
This is in fact the actual title of the monthly magazine put out by the Diocese of St. Edmundsbury & Ipswich!

As the wife of an Essex Man™ I probably ought to have known that, but I didn't. Honestly.

Posted by crynwrcymraeg (# 13018) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Baptist Trainfan:

quote:
Originally posted by Amanda B. Reckondwythe:
Whispers -- a worship service held in the late afternoon, characterized by inaudible prayers.
Presumably the version used by the Church in Wales in called Mumbles - especially in the Swansea area. What the Welsh speakers might call it, I haven't a clue.

What a bout Mwmial or Myngial ? [Smile]

Posted by Pax Romana (# 4653) on :

Romeantics: the weekly bingo games at many Catholic parishes in the United States. This can be expanded to include bake sales, raffles, dinner dances and other revenue-earning activities that have nothing to do with liturgy or pastoral work.

Pax Romana

Posted by Vulpior (# 12744) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Silver Faux:
Implaquable: A congreation with an absolute rule against tacking memorial or "in dedication" plaques onto any of the Holy Hardware.

But in other places you might have:

Memento Significans Objects with overly prominent dedication plaques

Memento Monstrosi Ugly and obsolete objects originally given by someone whose distant descendant still worships here on occasion.

Posted by Chorister (# 473) on :

OK Chorale when the choir manage to get the anthem right.

Renduring when they don't.

Posted by Bob Two-Owls (# 9680) on :

Sermoan - the act of whingeing from the pulpit.

Wranglican - someone who invokes the name of the church in order to try and get a better deal.

Seventh Day Avoidist - someone who is there for every church gathering or social, except for the service on Sunday.

Fearlogian - a hellfire and damnation kind of theologian.

Posted by Sioni Sais (# 5713) on :

Geekon A person at the first stage of ordination who is able to minister to the church website.

Posted by Baptist Trainfan (# 15128) on :

Yukarist - you haven't tasted the horrible wime we use in our church!

Posted by Schroedinger's cat (# 64) on :

Coughy the usual drink for after services, which is liable to cause some spluttering.

Posted by Pax Romana (# 4653) on :

Caffeine Water: church coffee, from a Folgers or Maxwell House tin, made by elderly ladies who diligently make sure it is not too strong.

Pax Romana

Posted by MrsDoyle (# 13579) on :

Clamice

A moist linen garment retreaved from a sweaty celebrant.

Posted by MrsDoyle (# 13579) on :

Raptism

Hip-hop liturgical setting for the initiation of new Christians.

Posted by MrsDoyle (# 13579) on :

Evangeline

Term to describe Susan whose Gospel account was trumped by her male counterparts

Posted by MrsDoyle (# 13579) on :

Prambulatory

Very Junior Church procession

Posted by MrsDoyle (# 13579) on :

Acolate

The reason there is only one candle bearer in the procession.

I know, I should get out more [Roll Eyes]

Posted by Raptor Eye (# 16649) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Bob Two-Owls:
Sermoan - the act of whingeing from the pulpit.

Wranglican - someone who invokes the name of the church in order to try and get a better deal.

Seventh Day Avoidist - someone who is there for every church gathering or social, except for the service on Sunday.

Fearlogian - a hellfire and damnation kind of theologian.

Posted by Sir Kevin (# 3492) on :

Erm, 7th Day Adventist services are never held on Sunday, only Saturday! I know - I mystery-worshipped one with Amanda B. Reckonwythe and Pigwigeon a while back.

Posted by Bob Two-Owls (# 9680) on :

I was conflating 7DA and mainstream church services for comedic effect. Most of the practicing Seventh Day Adventists I know would never dream of not being at the service on Saturday. That is more of a Sunday lie in thing for the rest of us... [Biased]

Posted by WhateverTheySay (# 16598) on :

Coinformation - Quantitive easing for Christians.

Posted by Pax Romana (# 4653) on :

Cantique de Wobble:

The choir's yearly rendition of "O Holy Night" for either Midnight Mass or Christmas Day. This is obligatory. The one year the organist suggested that they either eliminate the song altogether or use a hired soloist there was a great hue and cry among the choir members, who would not be deterred from inflicting their off-key ensemble version on the congregation.

Pax Romana

Posted by Fradgan (# 16455) on :

HUSHWORTHY

A prayer so lengthy and unfocused that it drives all attendees into silence.

Posted by The Great Gumby (# 10989) on :

Sharing the Piss - Taking the opportunity to nip out to the toilet while everyone's moving around

Te Dium - A prayer that the choir would shut up for once

Praysing - Giving thanks for fine weather. By tradition, this takes the form of a short prayer before everyone processes home to light their barbecues.

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