Thread: Mansplaining Board: Hell / Ship of Fools.


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Posted by cliffdweller (# 13338) on :
 
Rant: Mansplaining. Never the obvious, egotistical version, but the more subtle, insidious kind. The mansplainer probably doesn't even realize he's doing it, since he can, in his better moments, be quite generous in acknowledging ones greater experience and expertise. But then-- perhaps out of habit-- there's those emails that just "express concern" that essentially you freakin' don't know what the hell you are doing, even though you've got a track record a mile long of successfully starting new ministries while he's the new kid on the block. So of course, out of the goodness of his heart, he has to explain all those things that could go wrong that I obviously didn't think of (even though that's my area of expertise) and did I think about ministry priorities and budget and so forth? He has a friend who does this and he said it was hard, so perhaps a teeny little girl like you ought not to be trying this. All said with so much love of course, with that caveat of "I hope you don't think I'm being negative..."

I want to call him on it, but then he'll be hurt but I'm too sensitive (aren't all females?) and prickly. All so very very passive aggressive, and I never know what to do with these sorts of obtuse passive-aggressive irritants. Maybe not deserving of the full-on, fire-and-brimstone, burning-for-all-eternity hell, but surely there should be some junior hell somewhere?



[ 30. September 2017, 00:03: Message edited by: cliffdweller ]
 

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Posted by Twilight (# 2832) on :
 
Dear Mansplainer,

Please don't be concerned, I can tell you're worried about all the changes coming up, and I completely understand. As I recall back in the day when I was first doing things of this kind, I used to get a bit flustered myself.

Rest assured, all the problems that you're anticipating have either already been dealt with or will be easily handled along the way.

Many thanks for caring so much, but there's no need for hysteria or panic. Try to stay calm and trust that it will all work out.
 

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Posted by cliffdweller (# 13338) on :
 
Yeah, more or less what I emailed thru gritted teeth.

Mostly he's a decent guy who will, when he's on his game, be really appreciative of my skills and experience. Then he'll fall back into what I'm guessing is a long-ingrained habit. But my fear is that that is what comes out when he's talking about me when I'm not there-- when some church member asks about the new ministry I'm spearheading (that over 1/3 of the congregation has already signed on to be a part of) does he express that same sort of gee-I-sure-hope-the-sky-doesn't-fall-in trepidation? Or when others express concerns does he give the complementary overreaction: "Oh, don't mention that to cliffdweller, you know how sensitive she is about any well-meaning suggestions..."

more
 

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Posted by Ohher (# 18607) on :
 
Well, this is your thread, so I won't hi-jack it with recent similar incidents from my own life. I'll just say I begin to think that mansplainers may be people I'll need to avoid from here on out in my life. I do not want to spend my dotage in prison.
 

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Posted by cliffdweller (# 13338) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Ohher:
Well, this is your thread, so I won't hi-jack it with recent similar incidents from my own life. I'll just say I begin to think that mansplainers may be people I'll need to avoid from here on out in my life. I do not want to spend my dotage in prison.

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Oh this is an pen access rant space so feel to let loose! I've got a feeling I'll resonate!
 

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Posted by lilBuddha (# 14333) on :
 
How about Oldsplaining then? I dislike it almost as much as mansplaining. I respect experience, but age does not automatically confer this, especially for something one has never done. All age inherently adds is the statistical nearness of death. Add manspaining on top of oldsplaining and one just might also increase the odds of the nearness of a boot to the bum.
 

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Posted by RooK (# 1852) on :
 
Aww, a lone mansplainer, dolloping out his 'splaining with clumsy smears. He wouldn't even rank among the mansplaining league at my office.

This is a difficult topic for me. Partially because of how problematic culture change is in a multinational engineering organization. But also because I know more than everybody else and feel a continuous need to explain that to them. And these stupid, petty mansplainers leave their sexist odour everywhere such that it taints my wholesome and equally-dispensed intellectual elitism.
 

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Posted by Golden Key (# 1468) on :
 
Rook--

Yeah, you just keep telling yourself that...

 

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Posted by simontoad (# 18096) on :
 
I can fall into mansplaining without knowing it very easily. My main problem is when discussions about the law come up, as that's something I practised last century. So many times I have told my wife, a skilled and practising lawyer about this or that aspect of litigation. I've even purported to tell her about family law, the area of her specialty in which I have worked on a total of one file more than 20 years ago.

I think the problem is: 1. An innate sense of being the one who knows things;
2. A sense that you are giving the comunicatee the gift of your expertise; and
3. You are just used to people being impressed with you and praising you.

Hmmm. Am I mansplaining mansplaining?
 

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Posted by Boogie (# 13538) on :
 
I'm a dogsplainer
 

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Posted by simontoad (# 18096) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Boogie:
I'm a dogsplainer

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Posted by rolyn (# 16840) on :
 
If you fancy mansplainer detox therapy try the episode of Rev where Abby turns up with her natural God given talents and Adam struggles with it big time. It's funny but may not cross the Pond well.

Some males feel the need to patronise females-- tedious fact. How can the after effects of 3 millennia of male superiority be completely swept in just a handful of decades.
 

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Posted by Golden Key (# 1468) on :
 
Turning the tables on men, for a couple of years, so they can see what it's like?
 

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Posted by Boogie (# 13538) on :
 
I don't think us females always help the situation.

I do the AV at Church, and I'm good at it. One bloke loves to tell me how to do stuff I was doing ten years ago (it's all new to him). What do I do? I kindly listen and 'learn'.

A bit like fake orgasms, it's the easier route
 

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Posted by rolyn (# 16840) on :
 

 

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Posted by Tortuf (# 3784) on :
 
I read a recent article in the New Yorker Why Facts Don't Change Our Minds. Hopefully it will not be behind a pay wall, because it is pretty interesting.

Essentially, once we are told we understand something, we will always believe we understand it better than anyone else, even if we are as full of shit as a Christmas Turkey.

Whoever this junior genius is has three significant handicaps:

He is a guy in a culture that tends to teach guys they are more capable than women.

He is young and has not yet had his head beaten in by experience enough to have any real humility.

He appears to be (at least relatively) fresh out of the box of being educated so he thinks he knows it all better than someone who has not been educated as well as he has. (In his humble opinion.)

Given time, and the polishing of experience in being wrong, he may turn out to be OK. He may even be an earnest soul who is potentially capable of learning.

As for when he starts mansplaining, you might be honest with him and tell him he is coming off as a bit condescending. If he tells you that you are being too sensitive, it is a reflection of his being callow. At that point you might feel free to tell him you have actual work to do instead of learning from the true master and maybe he could come back when you don't have any work to do - like say 2028 or so.
 

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Posted by Martin60 (# 368) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by rolyn:
If you fancy mansplainer detox therapy try the episode of Rev where Abby turns up with her natural God given talents and Adam struggles with it big time. It's funny but may not cross the Pond well.

Some males feel the need to patronise females-- tedious fact. How can the after effects of 3 millennia of male superiority be completely swept in just a handful of decades.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Boogie:
I don't think us females always help the situation.

I do the AV at Church, and I'm good at it. One bloke loves to tell me how to do stuff I was doing ten years ago (it's all new to him). What do I do? I kindly listen and 'learn'.

A bit like fake orgasms, it's the easier route

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Posted by cliffdweller (# 13338) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Tortuf:


Whoever this junior genius is has three significant handicaps:

He is a guy in a culture that tends to teach guys they are more capable than women.

He is young and has not yet had his head beaten in by experience enough to have any real humility.

He appears to be (at least relatively) fresh out of the box of being educated so he thinks he knows it all better than someone who has not been educated as well as he has. (In his humble opinion.)

Given time, and the polishing of experience in being wrong, he may turn out to be OK. He may even be an earnest soul who is potentially capable of learning.

As for when he starts mansplaining, you might be honest with him and tell him he is coming off as a bit condescending. If he tells you that you are being too sensitive, it is a reflection of his being callow. At that point you might feel free to tell him you have actual work to do instead of learning from the true master and maybe he could come back when you don't have any work to do - like say 2028 or so.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Tortuf:
I read a recent article in the New Yorker Why Facts Don't Change Our Minds. Hopefully it will not be behind a pay wall, because it is pretty interesting.

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quote:

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Originally posted by cliffdweller:
He's retired from a successful business career, which I think adds to the mix

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quote:

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It also ties in with something I read recently that says the reason so many men are reluctant to help with the housework is they think they aren't good at it.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Tortuf:
One of the most valuable lessons I have ever learned is that it is a good thing to admit it when you are wrong; not only to other people, but yourself as well.

So, cliffdweller, I was wrong about this guy being young. He appears to just be young at head.

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quote:

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Originally posted by mousethief:
I understand that mansplaining needs stamping out. I have caught myself mansplaining and been caught out mansplaining by women who cared enough about me to point out what I was doing without either shutting me off, or attacking me. Which is probably above and beyond the call of duty for them, and I am thankful.

Sadly I have also been accused of mansplaining when I was not -- I was trying to explain my point of view, not explain to somebody else what they should do or something they already know. It totally shut down the conversation. If I tried to explain why I didn't believe what I was doing was mansplaining, THAT would be tagged as mansplaining. At that point the conversation was over.

Mansplaining is a powerful concept that can shine a light on a ugly, abusive behavior. It needs to not be misused.

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quote:

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Originally posted by cliffdweller:
Mr Cheesy, I love your wife already, and want to be her when I grow up.

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quote:

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Originally posted by mr cheesy:
Oh dear, sorry. I think I might have just been mansplaining mansplaining.

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quote:

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Originally posted by rolyn:
Females can sometimes overcompensate when breaking into what is generally viewed to be a man's domain.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Doublethink.:
How was driving in 2002 a "man's domain" in the industrialised west rolyn ?

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quote:

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Originally posted by Doublethink.:
How was driving in 2002 a "man's domain" in the industrialised west rolyn ?

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quote:

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Originally posted by Leorning Cniht:

quote:

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Originally posted by Doublethink.:
How was driving in 2002 a "man's domain" in the industrialised west rolyn ?

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IME, when a mixed-sex couple drives somewhere, it is significantly more common for the man to drive. Women driving cars is normal, of course. Women driving a car with an adult man in the passenger's seat are fairly rare on roads around here.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Doublethink.:
And your explanation for aggressive driving by men is ?

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quote:

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Originally posted by rolyn:

quote:

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Originally posted by Doublethink.:
And your explanation for aggressive driving by men is ?

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They're wankers

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quote:

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Originally posted by Leorning Cniht:

quote:

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Originally posted by Doublethink.:
How was driving in 2002 a "man's domain" in the industrialised west rolyn ?

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IME, when a mixed-sex couple drives somewhere, it is significantly more common for the man to drive. Women driving cars is normal, of course. Women driving a car with an adult man in the passenger's seat are fairly rare on roads around here.

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My husband and I are equally competent drivers. But I am much better at being a passenger than him. I think this is true of many couples.

 

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Posted by simontoad (# 18096) on :
 
Gold, NEQ, pure gold.
 

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Posted by cliffdweller (# 13338) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by anoesis:
I feel for you in your dilemma, Cliffdweller. My father-in-law is a mansplainer extraordinaire, which is frequently face-meltingly frustrating, particularly given that he's a completely lovely person and in no way a chauvinist pig. His wife (i.e.: my mother-in-law) is basically a genius, who speaks a completely ridiculous number of languages. I'm guessing they've evolved a sort of symbiosis over time - she accepts being mansplained to and says 'yes dear' a great deal, he is the acknowledged expert on anything practical, and all his bustling the place around affords her more time to sit and read books. This is all in great contrast to my own father, several years gone now, who strutted around being all 'head of the household' (in theory) while my much more practical mother actually ran the show. Despite absolutely decrying feminism, (in theory) he'll have my eternal gratitude for always engaging with me as just another person, no more, no less, whenever we sparred over some issue, which was very frequently, to our mutual satisfaction. God, I miss him.

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quote:

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Originally posted by rolyn:
Heading towards me, hogging the road and expecting me to make way would often be an aggressive overcompensatory female.

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quote:

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Originally posted by anoesis:
My father-in-law is a mansplainer extraordinaire, which is frequently face-meltingly frustrating, particularly given that he's a completely lovely person and in no way a chauvinist pig.

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quote:

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Originally posted by cliffdweller:
This made me smile

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quote:

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Originally posted by cliffdweller:
This made me smile

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quote:

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Originally posted by Hiro's Leap:

quote:

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Originally posted by rolyn:
Heading towards me, hogging the road and expecting me to make way would often be an aggressive overcompensatory female.

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I wouldn't want to rule this out entirely, but it strikes me as much more likely that there's a cognitive bias here: some female drivers stood out as particularly aggressive because you didn't expect them to be.

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There is probably truth in there.
The hidden narrative in my head being that women drivers should approach in modest vehicles at modest speed. Having encountered me coming the other way, slowdown or stop, then offer kindly acknowledgment that I have reversed or got in the ditch to make room.

The real beef used to come from the occasions when passing places were gleefully ignored despite it being obvious that to continue made blockage inevitable. And yes men are inclined do it as well, but then like you say I expect that.
Closing footnote being this driver is not himself blameless at having pissed off other road users.
 

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Posted by Penny S (# 14768) on :
 
Over many years I have held that when two cars meet in a single track road it is the woman driver (me) who has to reverse, even downhill, when the Highway code stipulates priority runs the other way. Only once has a driver given way - a farmer south of Minehead.
But lately, I have found that women driving suspiciously clean large supposedly off roadish vehicles are behaving that way. I have seen one force a police car to reverse downhill out of their way! And as for gaps, they have to maintain a gap of at least a foot between their nearside and the hedge. While my little Skoda has to risk the vegetation (which is, granted, a risk, since hedging is now down by flails which leave arm thick branch ends hidden by later growth). And those women, being higher up, never make eye contact, or acknowledge with a hand gesture one's politeness.
 

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Posted by Doc Tor (# 9748) on :
 
I learnt to drive on country tarmac. I am well versed in a wide range of hand gestures.

Including the one that means, "there is a passing place right behind you. And yes, I can wait all day for you to realise that."
 

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Posted by simontoad (# 18096) on :
 
Have you thought about pulling out a book
 

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Posted by mr cheesy (# 3330) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Penny S:
Over many years I have held that when two cars meet in a single track road it is the woman driver (me) who has to reverse, even downhill, when the Highway code stipulates priority runs the other way. Only once has a driver given way - a farmer south of Minehead.
But lately, I have found that women driving suspiciously clean large supposedly off roadish vehicles are behaving that way. I have seen one force a police car to reverse downhill out of their way! And as for gaps, they have to maintain a gap of at least a foot between their nearside and the hedge. While my little Skoda has to risk the vegetation (which is, granted, a risk, since hedging is now down by flails which leave arm thick branch ends hidden by later growth). And those women, being higher up, never make eye contact, or acknowledge with a hand gesture one's politeness.

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I think the problem is that single-track roads are difficult and that the highway code doesn't really help in many situations.

Most sensible people will reverse if they're closest to a passing space - but there are certainly an increasing number of people who refuse or are not able to reverse. When I used to drive minibuses in the lanes of Devon and Cornwall, I've seen people get out of cars and allow others to reverse their car for them..

If one adds in a hill and a bend plus inexperienced drivers in those conditions, then the difficulty is multiplied.

According to the Highway Code, one might supposedly have the right of way going up a hill, but the reality might also be that that's actually more difficult if the road is bending steeply downhill.

That's not dismissing what you are saying - these lanes seem to attract some idiots - but it is also to say that it isn't easy.
 

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Posted by Boogie (# 13538) on :
 
Thanks for splaining that mr cheesy
 

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Posted by mr cheesy (# 3330) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Boogie:
Thanks for splaining that mr cheesy

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quote:

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Originally posted by Ricardus:
I wonder if we can add Mumsplaining to the list?

Take a crying baby into a public place and sooner or later a woman of a certain age will feel it necessary to impart the benefit of her immense wisdom:

'Do you think he could be hungry?'

GOSH I DIDN'T KNOW YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO FEED THEM I THOUGHT THEY JUST PHOTOSYNTHESISED IN THE SUNLIGHT

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quote:

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Originally posted by Amos:
'Fewer children' please.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Penny S:
I realise that I did not make it sufficiently clear that until the advent of the SUV women, it was always men who made me reverse. And who had just passed the passing places.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Rossweisse:

quote:

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Originally posted by Amos:
'Fewer children' please.

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(Thank you, Amos.)

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I wasn't sure if that was a correction, or a request.
 

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Posted by Nenya (# 16427) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Boogie:
I don't think us females always help the situation.

I do the AV at Church, and I'm good at it. One bloke loves to tell me how to do stuff I was doing ten years ago (it's all new to him). What do I do? I kindly listen and 'learn'.

A bit like fake orgasms, it's the easier route

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Posted by Golden Key (# 1468) on :
 
cliffdweller and others--

You might find it helpful, funny, and/or a relief to give out some of these (McPhee).

 

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Posted by Karl: Liberal Backslider (# 76) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by jbohn:

quote:

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Originally posted by Rossweisse:

quote:

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Originally posted by Amos:
'Fewer children' please.

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(Thank you, Amos.)

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I wasn't sure if that was a correction, or a request.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Karl: Liberal Backslider:

quote:

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Originally posted by jbohn:

quote:

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Originally posted by Rossweisse:

quote:

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Originally posted by Amos:
'Fewer children' please.

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(Thank you, Amos.)

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I wasn't sure if that was a correction, or a request.

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Neither. It's "look how much more educated than you I am" superior pedantry. Cut it out.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Karl: Liberal Backslider:
Neither. It's "look how much more educated than you I am" superior pedantry. Cut it out.

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Wow. I thought it was an attempt to make it easier to read comments on the board by encouraging the use of the right words to say what you mean. It's not pedantry at all.
 

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Posted by quetzalcoatl (# 16740) on :
 
I thought it was a brilliant postmodern joke, by demonstrating how to be priggish and patronizing, or really, peoplesplaining.
 

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Posted by Boogie (# 13538) on :
 
grammarsplaining - the internet is full of it
 

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Posted by quetzalcoatl (# 16740) on :
 
The world is full of it. I used to teach linguistics, and got tired of arguments with people about correctness. It's correct because, er, er, my primary school teacher taught it to me.
 

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Posted by Rossweisse (# 2349) on :
 
No, it's correct because words have specific meanings, and those meanings matter.

Well, they matter to some of us, at least.
 

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Posted by balaam (# 4543) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Boogie:
grammarsplaining - the internet is full of it

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quote:

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Originally posted by Rossweisse:
No, it's correct because words have specific meanings, and those meanings matter.

Well, they matter to some of us, at least.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Rossweisse:
No, it's correct because words have specific meanings, and those meanings matter.

Well, they matter to some of us, at least.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Boogie:
I am dyslexic and I work hard all the time with spelling and grammar. Some mistakes still slip by and always will. But the grammar/spelling police are ever prowling ...

🐺 🐺 🐺

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quote:

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Originally posted by balaam:
Which gives you licence to abuse dyslexics.

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quote:

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Originally posted by quetzalcoatl:
Fuck off.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Amos:
'Fewer children' please.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Rossweisse:

quote:

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Originally posted by Karl: Liberal Backslider:
Neither. It's "look how much more educated than you I am" superior pedantry. Cut it out.

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Wow. I thought it was an attempt to make it easier to read comments on the board by encouraging the use of the right words to say what you mean. It's not pedantry at all.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Karl: Liberal Backslider:

quote:

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Originally posted by Rossweisse:

quote:

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Originally posted by Karl: Liberal Backslider:
Neither. It's "look how much more educated than you I am" superior pedantry. Cut it out.

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Wow. I thought it was an attempt to make it easier to read comments on the board by encouraging the use of the right words to say what you mean. It's not pedantry at all.

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Bullshit. Everyone knows what "less children" means.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Karl: Liberal Backslider:
It's "look how much more educated than you I am" superior pedantry. Cut it out.

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quote:

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Originally posted by mousethief:

quote:

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Originally posted by Karl: Liberal Backslider:
It's "look how much more educated than you I am" superior pedantry. Cut it out.

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Can't speak for anybody else, of course, but who died and made you the king of Hell, that you can tell people what to say and not say? Cut it out.

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Oooh, so now you're the guardian of the Hell ethos. Cut it out.




[ 05. October 2017, 01:47: Message edited by: lilBuddha ]
 

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Posted by Rossweisse (# 2349) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Karl: Liberal Backslider:
Bullshit. Everyone knows what "less children" means. You don't make anything clearer by pedantically picking apart common usages.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Rossweisse:

quote:

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Originally posted by Karl: Liberal Backslider:
Bullshit. Everyone knows what "less children" means. You don't make anything clearer by pedantically picking apart common usages.

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And bless your heart. I really have trouble reading phrasing like that without having to stop and think about what the writer means. You don't get any credit for lashing out at people who critique your lazy usage.

(And I wasn't even the Shipmate who posted the original correction...)

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quote:

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Originally posted by mr cheesy:
OK I admit to not being a linguistics or grammar expert and these things have always confused me.

Fewer sounds better than less to me in the sentence "Younger mothers with less children than me."

Apparently it is correct to say "fewer" with plurals and numbers of things, "less" with abstracts.

But who created these rules and why?

Less money but fewer children. Less sheep sounds about the same as fewer sheep. Less cloud sounds better than fewer cloud (or fewer clouds). Less stars or fewer stars?

Seems to me this is a pretty elastic rule. If it doesn't really come naturally in speech and we can't really define why one thing is right or wrong, then maybe the rule is loosening or changing over time anyway..?

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quote:

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Originally posted by Twilight:

quote:

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Originally posted by Amos:
'Fewer children' please.

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This is why a thread about mansplaining on the "Ship of Fools," is so amusing. There are so many teachers, pastors and doctors it's like a convention of natural born 'splainers.

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The church I used to attend in Chester was full of that, male and female, all of them teachers.

I did wonder about whether the correction of what I said was classist. I've experienced more classism from Christians than any other group I've been part of, people all ready to teach Eliza Doolittle here, putting me in my place. Still, I'm calling everything classist at the moment, and my underclassness (that word exists, since just now) is probably not known to anyone here, even those I'm friends with on Facebook. Still, classism is an element of Anglicanism at least, so let's have fewer of that class-splaining here.

Here's a rare smilie from me, just in case people think I'm writing this in capital letters in green ink:
 

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Posted by Bishops Finger (# 5430) on :
 
GREEN INK!

Is Outrage!

Underlined twice, please, in RED ink - with a RULER!

IJ
 

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Posted by Twilight (# 2832) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Rosa Winkel:


Still, classism is an element of Anglicanism at least, so let's have fewer of that class-splaining here.

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Thank you Rosa! I'm currently trying to 'splain that very thing to the people on my TV forum while talking about "Poldark." Demelza's very lower class brothers are newly minted Methodists and the reaction when they walked into the Poldark family's CofE church was not just due to their unkempt appearance. They were [shudder] talking about Jesus.

 

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Posted by Bishops Finger (# 5430) on :
 
And (IIRC) singing hymns before the Squire arrived for service!



IJ
 

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Posted by quetzalcoatl (# 16740) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Rosa Winkel:

quote:

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Originally posted by Twilight:

quote:

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Originally posted by Amos:
'Fewer children' please.

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This is why a thread about mansplaining on the "Ship of Fools," is so amusing. There are so many teachers, pastors and doctors it's like a convention of natural born 'splainers.

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The church I used to attend in Chester was full of that, male and female, all of them teachers.

I did wonder about whether the correction of what I said was classist. I've experienced more classism from Christians than any other group I've been part of, people all ready to teach Eliza Doolittle here, putting me in my place. Still, I'm calling everything classist at the moment, and my underclassness (that word exists, since just now) is probably not known to anyone here, even those I'm friends with on Facebook. Still, classism is an element of Anglicanism at least, so let's have fewer of that class-splaining here.

Here's a rare smilie from me, just in case people think I'm writing this in capital letters in green ink:

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It can be based on class, but also on dialect, although of course, dialect intersects with class. Thus, Standard English could be said to be class-based.

But the dialect stuff comes up a lot in over-corrections. I remember furious rows over double negatives, which seem to be well-formed in some dialects, but not Standard English, speakers of which therefore declare double negatives to be 'incorrect'. Thankfully, linguistics has rid itself of such snobbery. Descriptive not prescriptive.
 

---

Posted by Bishops Finger (# 5430) on :
 
Not down hear, they don't - not never, not nohow.

IJ
 

---

Posted by Bishops Finger (# 5430) on :
 
(or not here even, nohow).



IJ
 

---

Posted by quetzalcoatl (# 16740) on :
 
Here, here.
 

---

Posted by Rossweisse (# 2349) on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Bishops Finger:
(or not here even, nohow). ...

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Boogie:
Think yourself lucky - some of us really have trouble reading anything at all and often have to go through things two or three times to be sure of the meaning. The worst of the lot is when people put no line breaks in text - but I see no ‘line breaks police’ around.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Bishops Finger:
Is Outrage!

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Golden Key:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Boogie:
Think yourself lucky - some of us really have trouble reading anything at all and often have to go through things two or three times to be sure of the meaning. The worst of the lot is when people put no line breaks in text - but I see no ‘line breaks police’ around.

---

This.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by lilBuddha:
Mansplainers be stupid.

---

It doesn't help that Mrs Landis gets wrong the chronological order of the 2 Heston films and that confuses the tweeter.
 

---

Posted by churchgeek (# 5557) on :
 
When I was living in the SF Bay Area, I got so sick of San Franciscans telling me "what happened to Detroit" that I coined my own term, Sanfransplaining. Just for that one purpose.

The most common reason was that Detroit was too stupid to diversify its industries. Of course, those of us who know Detroit history know that our industries were diverse. Just, a lot of them fled when the going started getting tough. Like capitalists often do. Greener pastures. Well, in this case, whiter. (Caucasian, that is.)

I started just enjoying telling them I intended to return to Detroit. Very patronizingly, they'd say, "Oh, it's home, right?"
 

---

Posted by lilBuddha (# 14333) on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Mr Clingford:

quote:

---

Originally posted by lilBuddha:
Mansplainers be stupid.

---

It doesn't help that Mrs Landis gets wrong the chronological order of the 2 Heston films and that confuses the tweeter.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Karl: Liberal Backslider:
I did coin the term Saisbonio* to describe the phenomenon of an Englishman telling a Welshman why he's wrong about Wales, Welsh culture or the language.

*From Sais - Englishman, and Esbonio, to explain.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by lilBuddha:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Mr Clingford:

quote:

---

Originally posted by lilBuddha:
Mansplainers be stupid.

---

It doesn't help that Mrs Landis gets wrong the chronological order of the 2 Heston films and that confuses the tweeter.

---

But that is irrelevant. She designed the costume. She sat in the theatre with Spielberg watching Secret of the Incas. The Greatest Show on Earth is not the film that inspired the Indiana Jones costume regardless of when it was made.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Mr Clingford:

quote:

---

Originally posted by lilBuddha:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Mr Clingford:

quote:

---

Originally posted by lilBuddha:
Mansplainers be stupid.

---

It doesn't help that Mrs Landis gets wrong the chronological order of the 2 Heston films and that confuses the tweeter.

---

But that is irrelevant. She designed the costume. She sat in the theatre with Spielberg watching Secret of the Incas. The Greatest Show on Earth is not the film that inspired the Indiana Jones costume regardless of when it was made.

---

No, it is relevant, but of rather lower priority to the fact that she was actually there.

---

Dios mío. Really dude? Mansplain me how?
 

---

Posted by Mr Clingford (# 7961) on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by lilBuddha:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Mr Clingford:

quote:

---

Originally posted by lilBuddha:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Mr Clingford:

quote:

---

Originally posted by lilBuddha:
Mansplainers be stupid.

---

It doesn't help that Mrs Landis gets wrong the chronological order of the 2 Heston films and that confuses the tweeter.

---

But that is irrelevant. She designed the costume. She sat in the theatre with Spielberg watching Secret of the Incas. The Greatest Show on Earth is not the film that inspired the Indiana Jones costume regardless of when it was made.

---

No, it is relevant, but of rather lower priority to the fact that she was actually there.

---

Dios mío. Really dude? Mansplain me how?

---

quote:

---

Charlton Heston’s wardrobe in the 1954 film “Secret of the Incas” inspired the clothes worn by this adventurous character 27 years later.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by lilBuddha:
The Jeopardy “answer” was

quote:

---

Charlton Heston’s wardrobe in the 1954 film “Secret of the Incas” inspired the clothes worn by this adventurous character 27 years later.

---

The order of the movies’ release is irrelevant to that.

---

Indeed.
 

---

Posted by The Intrepid Mrs S (# 17002) on :
 
Can I raise my head above the parapet and coin the term 'mansuming' here?

I adore my Mazda MX-5 (low-slung two-seater frankly sports car, for those of you who really aren't interested in cars) but on at least three occasions, having watched me get out of the driver's seat and pocket the keys, men have rushed up to my male passenger with delighted cries of 'How long have you had the Mazda/is the folding metal roof the way to go/what sort of mpg do you get?' and the like

Nearly as bad as 'and have you got a little car of your own, then?' or when we are on a sailing holiday, men mansuming that Mr S is the skipper and I the galley slave. Au contraire - Mr S fulfils the vital roles of brute force, ignorance and navigation while I look after the bits of cloth and string, as befits someone of the feminine persuasion

Mrs. S, spluttering indignantly
 

---

Posted by Doc Tor (# 9748) on :
 
You may indeed. It will cover a multitude of sins.
 

---

Posted by Pigwidgeon (# 10192) on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by The Intrepid Mrs S:
Can I raise my head above the parapet and coin the term 'mansuming' here?

---

quote:

---

Effete Oxford twerp- "This is how I explain the otherwise puzzling differences between the sexes… where men have intellect, women have a soul."

Joy Gresham- "As you say, Professor Reilly, I’m from the United States and different cultures have different modes of discourse… are you trying to be offensive or just merely stupid?"

---

 

---

Posted by Golden Key (# 1468) on :
 
Lyda--


 

---

Posted by jbohn (# 8753) on :
 
I once had the sublime experience of standing on deck aboard a schooner, listening to a man with a degree in Physics explain to the captain of said schooner how tacking into the wind isn't actually possible - while she was doing it...
 

---

Posted by Leorning Cniht (# 17564) on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by jbohn:
I once had the sublime experience of standing on deck aboard a schooner, listening to a man with a degree in Physics explain to the captain of said schooner how tacking into the wind isn't actually possible - while she was doing it...

---

He probably believes that bees can't fly either.
 

---

Posted by RooK (# 1852) on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by The Intrepid Mrs S:
I adore my Mazda MX-5

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by RooK:

quote:

---

Originally posted by The Intrepid Mrs S:
I adore my Mazda MX-5

---

[respect]
Do you happen to read Jalopnik?

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by lilBuddha:
I like Jalopnik, but say he's got it wrong.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by RooK:

quote:

---

Originally posted by lilBuddha:
I like Jalopnik, but say he's got it wrong.

---

Well, obviously. Though not as wrong as you. Until recently, the answer to everything was "Porsche 911". Now the truth must be admitted that the answer to everything is "electric drive". I dream of a future when we reach utopia: "Electric drive Porsche 911-esque".

---

Well, an electric Porsche will result in fewer over-priced parts to pay for, so that is a plus.
Electric, really? I though we were talking about cars and driving.

 

---

Posted by Doc Tor (# 9748) on :
 
Get a room, you two.
 

---

Posted by Golden Key (# 1468) on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by jbohn:
I once had the sublime experience of standing on deck aboard a schooner, listening to a man with a degree in Physics explain to the captain of said schooner how tacking into the wind isn't actually possible - while she was doing it...

---

There was a long-ago episode of either "Love Boat" or "Love, American Style" where this smart guy meets up with a *stereotypical* dumb, beautiful blonde on a cruise. He tries to teach her stuff, she simpers stupidly. Then, at the end of the cruise, she pipes up to correct him on something. When he freaks out, she explains that she was tired of guys who were turned off by her brain. IIRC, she was an astrophysicist.

They got together.
 

---

Posted by RooK (# 1852) on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by lilBuddha:
Well, an electric Porsche will result in fewer over-priced parts to pay for, so that is a plus.
Electric, really? I though we were talking about cars and driving.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Doc Tor:
Get a room, you two.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by jbohn:
I once had the sublime experience of standing on deck aboard a schooner, listening to a man with a degree in Physics explain to the captain of said schooner how tacking into the wind isn't actually possible - while she was doing it...

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by RooK:

quote:

---

Originally posted by lilBuddha:
Well, an electric Porsche will result in fewer over-priced parts to pay for, so that is a plus.
Electric, really? I though we were talking about cars and driving.

---

Oh, I see. You've never had the Porsche experience. Or a real electric drive experience. That's the only explanation I can see for the massive bout of carsplaining you're begging for.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Lamb Chopped:
Phone rings.
"May i speak to Dr. Lamb, please?"
"Speaking. How may i help you?"
(Condescendingly) "No, i meant DOCTOR Lamb."
(With an edge in my voice) "SPEAKING. HOW MAY I HELP YOU?"
"I mean REVEREND Dr. Lamb."
"This is Dr. Lamb. I will be happy to get Rev. Lamb for you now."

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by mr cheesy:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Karl: Liberal Backslider:
I did coin the term Saisbonio* to describe the phenomenon of an Englishman telling a Welshman why he's wrong about Wales, Welsh culture or the language.

*From Sais - Englishman, and Esbonio, to explain.

---

In the Welsh Assembly that's simple known as "Neil Hamilton"

---

All true. Quick and near-certain route to the Promised land.
 

---

Posted by North East Quine (# 13049) on :
 
I used to watch crap TV (home makeover shows etc) whilst ironing my husband's shirts. He used to explain that I'd rot my brain watching such rubbish, and say that he would never risk his own mighty brain by watching inane T.V. Eventually I realised that I was losing my husband's respect by watching mindless drivel whilst ironing his shirts. But I knew that I was incapable of watching anything intellectually challenging and ironing at the same time.

So I stopped ironing his shirts.

His mighty brain had genuinely not anticipated that as a solution to the problem.
 

---

Posted by Golden Key (# 1468) on :
 
NEQ--

ROTFL! Well done!
 

---

Posted by cliffdweller (# 13338) on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by North East Quine:
I used to watch crap TV (home makeover shows etc) whilst ironing my husband's shirts. He used to explain that I'd rot my brain watching such rubbish, and say that he would never risk his own mighty brain by watching inane T.V. Eventually I realised that I was losing my husband's respect by watching mindless drivel whilst ironing his shirts. But I knew that I was incapable of watching anything intellectually challenging and ironing at the same time.

So I stopped ironing his shirts.

His mighty brain had genuinely not anticipated that as a solution to the problem.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by cliffdweller:

quote:

---

Originally posted by North East Quine:
I stopped ironing his shirts.

His mighty brain had genuinely not anticipated that as a solution to the problem.

---

Love the sass, but I am curious-- what is this "ironing" of which you speak?

---

It's derived from "irony", you know, that weird British thing.
 

---

Posted by The Intrepid Mrs S (# 17002) on :
 
SS
 

---

Posted by cliffdweller (# 13338) on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Sioni Sais:

quote:

---

Originally posted by cliffdweller:

quote:

---

Originally posted by North East Quine:
I stopped ironing his shirts.

His mighty brain had genuinely not anticipated that as a solution to the problem.

---

Love the sass, but I am curious-- what is this "ironing" of which you speak?

---

It's derived from "irony", you know, that weird British thing.

---

well done.

 

---

Posted by Leaf (# 14169) on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by North East Quine:
I stopped ironing his shirts.

His mighty brain had genuinely not anticipated that as a solution to the problem.

---

 

---

Posted by Rossweisse (# 2349) on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by cliffdweller:
Love the sass, but I am curious-- what is this "ironing" of which you speak?

---

I regard wrinkles as a fashion statement. (You are free to decide for yourself just what that statement might be.)
 

---

Posted by mrs whibley (# 4798) on :
 
I'm grateful for the opportunity to commit my very favourite mansplain to pixels.

A former boss was older, more experienced and in some areas more knowledgeable than I. He spent a lot of time explaining things, and even when we got to those subjects where I was on familiar ground, I usually took the Boogie route and just smiled and nodded. A Lot.

I am over 40 and, this is relevant, have lived all my life in the UK.

Late last September, he said the following to me:
'Oh, it's coming up to that time of year again when it will be getting dark in the late afternoons. But you'd know that; you were here last year.'
I nodded. And smiled.
 

---

Posted by simontoad (# 18096) on :
 


I'm afraid I began to mansplain the movement of the sun each afternoon to my wife last night, in the context of describing my gardening choices. She looked up at me with my metaphorical pipe in my mouth and said something like "Does it? Does the sun really move like that? Wow."

Project Toad continues.
 

---

Posted by Eliab (# 9153) on :
 
My daughter (aged 9 at the time - so y'all will sympathise with what I have to deal with) came up with the word "factulent" for the practice of passing information in the uncontrolled and unwelcome manner of one passing wind.

If she wants to know what a word means, and I tell her, that's fine. If I go on to tell her that it comes from the Latin or Norse word for ... "Dad's being factulent again!"


I prefer that to "mansplaining". More insulting and less sexist.
 

---

Posted by M. (# 3291) on :
 
That is an incredibly useful, pithy and generally wonderful, addition to the English language and I am going to start using it, with proper acknowledgement, immediately.

I've always hated the word mansplaining because it is so unpleasantly sexist.

M.
 

---

Posted by Brenda Clough (# 18061) on :
 
You hire a press flack as you hire a lawyer -- someone to be your spokesman. What they themselves believe in their heart is irrelevant. If you don't want to defend a murderer, you can decline the case. She decided to work for Lyin' Don of her own free will, knowing (from plentiful recent examples) that associating with him is like touching tar, blackening a person beyond cleansing. She knew that once Sean Spicer was a decent human being. She saw the awful fate of Chris Christie. She signed on anyway.
 

---

Posted by balaam (# 4543) on :
 
Posted that on the right thread, Brenda?

(Was that factulent enough for you?)
 

---

Posted by Anselmina (# 3032) on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by M.:


I've always hated the word mansplaining because it is so unpleasantly sexist.

M.

---

Ditto 'old wives' tales'? I always felt this was essentially a sexist term, but yet somehow did describe a well-established human practice of folk-loric style of wisdom, probably inaccurate and not much to be trusted.But ruined because of its implied association with elderly women!
 

---

Posted by lilBuddha (# 14333) on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by M.:
That is an incredibly useful, pithy and generally wonderful, addition to the English language and I am going to start using it, with proper acknowledgement, immediately.

I've always hated the word mansplaining because it is so unpleasantly sexist.

M.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Anselmina:
Ditto 'old wives' tales'? I always felt this was essentially a sexist term, but yet somehow did describe a well-established human practice of folk-loric style of wisdom, probably inaccurate and not much to be trusted.But ruined because of its implied association with elderly women!

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Brenda Clough:
You hire a press flack as you hire a lawyer -- someone to be your spokesman. What they themselves believe in their heart is irrelevant. If you don't want to defend a murderer, you can decline the case. She decided to work for Lyin' Don of her own free will, knowing (from plentiful recent examples) that associating with him is like touching tar, blackening a person beyond cleansing. She knew that once Sean Spicer was a decent human being. She saw the awful fate of Chris Christie. She signed on anyway.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by agingjb:
"Factulent" goes with "swallowed the dictionary" and "too much information" as proper dismissals of unwelcome expressions of knowledge and intelligence.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Leorning Cniht:

quote:

---

Originally posted by agingjb:
"Factulent" goes with "swallowed the dictionary" and "too much information" as proper dismissals of unwelcome expressions of knowledge and intelligence.

---

What is this "unwelcome expressions of knowledge" concept of which you speak?

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Eliab:

I prefer that to "mansplaining". More insulting and less sexist.

---

quote:

---

I've always hated the word mansplaining because it is so unpleasantly sexist.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by M.:
But anyone can be guilty of that, JaneR. Calling it 'mansplaining' suggests it's exclusive to men.

M.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by M.:
But anyone can be guilty of that, JaneR. Calling it 'mansplaining' suggests it's exclusive to men.

M.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Rossweisse:
A discussion of manspreading on Facebook brought up the same objections of sexism, although, in my experience, it, too, is an overwhelmingly male practice.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Lamb Chopped:
IME we are rigorously drilled in not displaying our bits (as we would in short skirts etc)

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Pigwidgeon:
Even women wearing slacks or jeans don't tend to do that. But it's often happened to me in theaters -- by men, of course.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Rossweisse:
It happens to me everywhere. I've started bumping them back when they do it, figuring I'm too little for them to slug.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by M.:
Blimey. Perhaps I've been lucky in my choice of men friends.

Perhaps I've put people down better.

But fine, let's disagree, because I just can't be arsed.

M. (Murdoch, apparently)

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Rossweisse:
A discussion of manspreading on Facebook brought up the same objections of sexism, although, in my experience, it, too, is an overwhelmingly male practice. I suggested calling it "jerkspreading" instead, and the fellows still grumped. From their reactions (one asked "What about big purses taking up seats?", to which I responded, "Put them on your laps" to general male silence), I suspect that they are themselves manspreading practitioners.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by M.:
I cannot be arsed to look up other people's experiences, because it's really not very important to me.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by M.:
And, I cannot be arsed to look up other people's experiences,

---

quote:

---

because it's really not very important to me.

---

quote:

---

his use of it was weaponised.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by mousethief:
Yeah, touching a woman's purse without leave is such a good idea. That wouldn't possibly be considered sexist (or illegal), would it?

---

What?!? I was telling them to put their own purses on their laps, of course. (They didn't specify whose they were.)

Surely you're not a manspreader, MT...?
 

---

Posted by North East Quine (# 13049) on :
 
The North East Man, who had such success explaining to me why I shouldn't watch crap TV whilst ironing his shirts, has done it again.

His car was overdue a service, but he hasn't had time to organise it. I had a dental appointment and saw an opportunity to kill two birds with one stone.

I dropped the car at the garage, walked to my dentist, then walked into the city centre to do some shopping. I combined a leisurely lunch with dealing with e-mails then walked back to the garage. The return route is mostly uphill, and by that point my rucksack was heavy with shopping. Then I drove to collect my husband from work.

My fitbit said that I had walked 9 miles and the equivalent of 54 flights of stairs. I was knackered. The North East Man was concerned at how tired I was after what he considered an untaxing day. "It's not as though nine miles is a lot of walking" he said. He then mansplained how such a day wouldn't have tired him, though his explanation was entirely hypothetical as I can't remember when he would last have walked nine miles in a day. Although the point about me carrying more weight than him is, alas, only too true.

Oh noes! My useless, unfit state is losing me my husband's respect. I'd better not risk helping him out like that again.



 

---

Posted by Doc Tor (# 9748) on :
 
Or iron his bloody shirts. If he wants his clothes flat, he can do them himself.
 

---

Posted by jacobsen (# 14998) on :
 
NEQ - have you considered absenting yourself from the quarry face for a time, long enough for him to miss your organisational skills?
 

---

Posted by North East Quine (# 13049) on :
 
The North East Man's own organisational skills are
genuinely impressive. Though some of his organisational calculations are based on the use of a parallel processing unit (i.e. me).
 

---

Posted by jacobsen (# 14998) on :
 
What happens when half of the parallel processing unit goes AWOL?
 

---

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