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Source: (consider it)
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Thread: Nuns at the Pearly Gates
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Simon
Editor
# 1
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Posted
Joke submitted by LupinPooter:
Three nuns arrive at the Pearly Gates and St Peter tells them that new rules have been put in place. To pass into Paradise, each nun must answer a religious question.
St Peter asks nun number one, "Who cut off Samson's hair?"
The nun answers, "Delilah," and is allowed into Paradise.
He turns to nun number two and asks, "Who first saw Jesus on Easter Sunday?"
The nun has to think for a bit, but finally recalls that it was Mary Magdelene and is allowed through the gates.
Finally, St Peter asks nun number three, "What were the first words Eve said to Adam?"
The nun bursts out, "Ooh, that's a hard one!"
"Congratulations," says St Peter. "In you go."
[ 11. July 2005, 09:01: Message edited by: Simon ]
Poll information
This poll contains 2 question(s). 92 user(s) have voted.
You can't view the results of this poll without voting.
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Eternal memory
Posts: 3787 | From: London | Registered: Mar 2001
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Ian Climacus
Liturgical Slattern
# 944
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Posted
I've heard this one many times before [and Ancient Mariner said it on Canadian radio this week!], so I knew what was coming.
I enjoy plays on words, so I find this one quite enjoyable. The (supposed) innocence of the nun [who should not think upon about the goings-on of the penises of men] and the response.
Not offensive.
Posts: 7800 | From: On the border | Registered: Jul 2001
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Ancient Mariner*
SOF Co-editor
# 105
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Posted
Ian, you'll notice that on CBC I didn't use the variation:
'Fuck me, that's a hard one.'
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'Now if you'll excuse me, I have to appear on a tortilla in Mexico...'
Jesus to Homer Simpson
Posts: 1087 | From: St Helens (near Liverpool) UK | Registered: May 2001
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Newman's Own
Shipmate
# 420
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Posted
I, too, enjoy plays on words, and found this joke amusing. It is all the funnier if one cannot help but picture innocent nuns (as innocent as Adam and Eve in the garden), concerned at passing the entrance exam for heaven (yes, only I would think of that... but, in convent life, there are tests of all sorts, and one never knows what the 'correct' answer will be), contrasted with the volatile, worldly fisherman Peter.
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Cheers,
Elizabeth
“History as Revelation is seldom very revealing, and histories of holiness are full of holes.” - Dermot Quinn
Posts: 6740 | From: Library or pub | Registered: Jun 2001
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Ferijen
Shipmate
# 4719
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Posted
The first time I heard this, I did find it quite funny. It was one of the end ones in the Vicar of Dibley. I think because it doesn't mock anything central to the Christian faith - the cross, the character of Christ, etc. - I don't find it offensive at all. In fact, you could take away the situation, and even the people, and though you'd lose some of the humour, it would still be mildly amusing in a play-on-words sort of way.
Offensive jokes for me are those which mock something which I hold sacred and which shouldn't be messed with. Just as I don't feel that you should tell jokes about tragedy - anyone remember the spate of Diana jokes circulating just after her death - I don't think that Christ on the cross should be used as a context for humour.
Posts: 3259 | From: UK | Registered: Jul 2003
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iGeek.*
Resident alien
# 3207
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Posted
I got a good chuckle 'cause I'd never heard it before. funny factor would go down with re-hearings, I'm sure.
I voted higher on the offense score than the majority 'cause I thought nuns speaking sexual innuendo (even without meaning to) might offend some folks. Especially if the "fuck me" were left innit.
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.sig on holiday
Posts: 702 | From: Hot-on-us, TX | Registered: Aug 2002
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Newman's Own
Shipmate
# 420
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Posted
I do not care for the "Fuck me," though I am hardly offended easily. The simple "that's a hard one" maintains the total innocence of the response, which I find essential to the contrast (between the nun and Peter) which gives the joke its impact.
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Cheers,
Elizabeth
“History as Revelation is seldom very revealing, and histories of holiness are full of holes.” - Dermot Quinn
Posts: 6740 | From: Library or pub | Registered: Jun 2001
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John Donne
Renaissance Man
# 220
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Posted
I may have got too worldly in my old age, but simple tits, bums and erections humour doesn't do it for me anymore.
(I'd prolly still find Dick Emery funny though).
Posts: 13667 | From: Perth, W.A. | Registered: May 2001
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Mamacita
Lakefront liberal
# 3659
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Posted
As others have noted, the chuckles in this joke come from the play on words and the nuns' innocence. I originally heard this joke told with a slight variation that emphasized the "difficult/hard" aspect of the joke (and the resultant pun). In this version, it is two young nuns and a mother superior who arrive at the pearly gates. And the questions given to the 2 nuns are even easier than the ones in the OP; e.g., "who built the Ark?" -- questions a person could answer with only a pop-culture-level knowledge of religion. Then St Peter turns to the mother superior and tells her that, based on her level of knowledge and experience, she will have a more challenging question.
What makes it work, I think, in part, is that the listener gets caught up in the quiz-taking aspect of the joke -- would I pass the test, too? -- and then, lulled by the simplicity of the first two questions, gets caught, like the mother superior, in not knowing the answer to St. Peter's question. That provides a millisecond of distraction -- while the listener is mentally reviewing his/her knowledge of bible stories -- to set up a punch line that's really only average but made funnier because the listener's mind is elsewhere.
I think the "Fuck me" addition to the nun's reply substantially changes the joke, and not for the better. For me, the humor is not just in the play on words, but that I could picture Eve actually saying similar words while seeing the body that's so different from her own. Without that silly mental image, it is, as Coot pointed out, just another erection joke.
If the "Fuck me" is added, it paints a picture of an Eve that is more libidinous and less innocent.
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Do not be daunted by the enormity of the world’s grief. Do justly, now. Love mercy, now. Walk humbly, now. You are not obligated to complete the work, but neither are you free to abandon it.
Posts: 20761 | From: where the purple line ends | Registered: Dec 2002
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Ariel
Shipmate
# 58
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Posted
The first time I heard this joke it wasn't about nuns, it was about dumb blondes and the questions were different but the punchline the same.
There's a sort of archetypal structure to some jokes really - they've been around for ages and every now and again the details get updated to keep them topical but the substance doesn't change. I first heard this one (or the one about blondes anyway) when I was a teenager. Oh how we all sniggered.
Um, anyway, verdict this time round, ![[Roll Eyes]](rolleyes.gif) . I don't know, I tend to think the sort of accidental humour that pops up in conversation is really a lot funnier than manufactured jokes and carefully structured, "formulaic" humour. A good joke has an element of unpredictability in it. This one follows a popular pattern, "best of three" and then the punchline.
Posts: 25445 | Registered: May 2001
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magnum mysterium
Shipmate
# 3418
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Posted
I recall this making an appearance on the Vicar of Dibley. An oldie but a goodie.
Posts: 3095 | Registered: Oct 2002
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John Donne
Renaissance Man
# 220
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Posted
I read this again, having forgotten it from the first time - and strangely I found it quite humorous this time! My capacity to be amused by sexual innuendo or mild scatology really does vary day-to-day. Depending on mood? Busy-ness? Amount of recent exposure to humour? Immediate previous activity? Maybe others too?
I'd be interested to hear from anyone else who had forgotten the punchline and read it again now a month later.
[ 08. August 2005, 08:58: Message edited by: The Coot ]
Posts: 13667 | From: Perth, W.A. | Registered: May 2001
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hosannajoy
Apprentice
# 10078
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Posted
I also first heard this joke on the Vicar of Dibley and found it hilarious until I realised that my mother genuinely didn't get it! I didn't have much fun trying to explain it.....
Posts: 2 | Registered: Aug 2005
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