Ship of Fools: Louis Armstrong I hate him.

Thread: Louis Armstrong I hate him. Board: Oblivion / Ship of Fools.

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Posted by Pyx_e (# 57) on :

Wonderful world, my ass.

Fly Safe, Pyx_e.

Posted by Matt Black (# 2210) on :

Wft are all these threads about Armstrongs doing on the Ship? Lance, Neil and now feckin' Louis!

Posted by The5thMary (# 12953) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Matt Black:
Wft are all these threads about Armstrongs doing on the Ship? Lance, Neil and now feckin' Louis!

Yeah! And wtf with starting a Hell thread about Louis Armstrong? Is he the only one who ever wrote a song about the world being wonderful? I doubt it, although I can't think of another song/songwriter off the top of my head at the moment.

Posted by Kelly Alves (# 2522) on :

I think that's the point.

And I know you're just being a shithead, Pyx, but you better back off my man Louie. You are not fit to sponge the dribble out of his water key.

Posted by Timothy the Obscure (# 292) on :

Fold it five ways and put it where the sun don't shine, Pxy_e. If you gotta go after somebody, make it Bob Thiele and George Weiss, who wrote the tune (yeah, it's kind of sappy, in a charming way). Lay off Pops or Kelly and I will make sure your ass is grass. [Mad]

Posted by Ariel (# 58) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Matt Black:
Wtf are all these threads about Armstrongs doing on the Ship? Lance, Neil and now feckin' Louis!

I know, I keep thinking there ought to be one in All Saints, then we'd have the set.

Posted by mousethief (# 953) on :

Pyx-e was jealous that Eversmug and Mark Betts were getting all the hell attention?

Posted by Kelly Alves (# 2522) on :

(High-fives Timothy)

Posted by balaam (# 4543) on :

Just because someone makes a happy positive song there's no need to hate them. McCartney wrote Good Day Sunshine.

.

On second thoughts, I think that proves Pyx_e right.

Posted by Tortuf (# 3784) on :

Pyx_e's thread has nothing to do with Louis, and everything to do with Lance.

Do try to keep up.

Posted by Kelly Alves (# 2522) on :

quote:
Originally posted by balaam:
Just because someone makes a happy positive song there's no need to hate them. McCartney wrote Good Day Sunshine.

.

On second thoughts, I think that proves Pyx_e right.

... yeah, bad example. [Disappointed]

Here's what sucks about being the quotes file mavin. The following? Brilliant.

quote:
Originally posted by Kelly Alves:

And I know you're just being a shithead, Pyx, but you better back off my man Louie. You are not fit to sponge the dribble out of his water key.

It even required a bit of research, otherwise it would have been, "You are not fit to sponge the dribble out of that thingy that releases the spit from the trumpet." Will it ever be enshrined in our memory? No. Because as my mom always said, the lady who buys the birthday cards never gets a card on her own birthday.

I'm not feeling sorry for myself or anything, I just don't think anyone loves or appreciates me. (shrug.)

[ 25. August 2012, 21:11: Message edited by: Kelly Alves ]

Posted by Tortuf (# 3784) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Kelly Alves:
I'm not feeling sorry for myself or anything, I just don't think anyone loves or appreciates me. (shrug.)

The Nashville Mafia loves you Kelly.

At least most of us do.

I think.

Posted by Kelly Alves (# 2522) on :

If that the case, then nothing else matters. Nothing. [Tear]

Posted by Sine Nomine (# 66) on :

This doesn't bode well for father Pyx_e's sermon tomorrow.

Posted by Kelly Alves (# 2522) on :

Boy, would I love to be a fly on the chalice for that one.

Posted by Sine Nomine (# 66) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Kelly Alves:
I just don't think anyone loves or appreciates me. (shrug.)

Dear God, woman! I "like" nearly everything you post on Facebook. What more do you want?

Posted by Kelly Alves (# 2522) on :

Oh, is that so?

(off to research.)

Posted by Sine Nomine (# 66) on :

(... well I mean the "likable" stuff of course.)

Posted by Gracious rebel (# 3523) on :

Actually for me I genuinely do hate that song, its his voice that really grates on me. Was watching a TV show recently of Top 50 number ones of all time, and when that one came on, my companions were a bit taken aback with the angry tirade it prompted from me!

Posted by Kelly Alves (# 2522) on :

It's totally overplayed, true. Good Morning, Vietnam should have put the nail in the coffin. But it's just one dorky song out of an otherwise stylistic, jazztastic career.

Posted by Twilight (# 2832) on :

I loved it Kelly, and read it out loud to my trumpet player husband who calls it a "spit valve," but knew the other, nicer term, too.

Now all together! Lets sing, "Put on a Happy Face," to Pyx_e, complete with hand motions.

Posted by Kelly Alves (# 2522) on :

Actually, 'Spit valve' would have been edgier, and was the term I was really looking for. Bah.

Posted by Pyx_e (# 57) on :

I considered a "RooKs Strong Arm Tactics" thread in Styx to round it off but by my estimation I'm 99 yards done on the 100 yd dash in Styx.

Tommorrows sermon is based around sitting in the door of the plane, parachute on getting ready to jump.............. for 40 years. In case anyone was intrested.

Fly Safe, Pyx_e

Posted by Twilight (# 2832) on :

What's that in the quotes file? (Even great comedians need an editor sometimes.)

Posted by Pyx_e (# 57) on :

quote:
Originally posted by mousethief:
Pyx-e was jealous that Eversmug and Mark Betts were getting all the hell attention?

cough 50615 cough

Posted by mousethief (# 953) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Pyx_e:

quote:
Originally posted by mousethief:
Pyx-e was jealous that Eversmug and Mark Betts were getting all the hell attention?
cough 50615 cough

Ah, so jealousy it is.

Posted by Kelly Alves (# 2522) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Twilight:
What's that in the quotes file? (Even great comedians need an editor sometimes.)

Some idiot polishing Ariston's ego, as if it needs it. Why do you a--

(backs up a page.)

Oh, you sweet thang! [Axe murder]

[ 25. August 2012, 22:31: Message edited by: Kelly Alves ]

Posted by lilBuddha (# 14333) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Tortuf:
Pyx_e's thread has nothing to do with Louis, and everything to do with Lance.

Do try to keep up.

Don't care, drag Louis into it and someone is likely to piss on your parachute and push.

quote:
Originally posted by Pyx_e:

Tommorrows sermon is based around sitting in the door of the plane, parachute on getting ready to jump.............. for 40 years. In case anyone was intrested.

Fly Safe, Pyx_e

Posted by Grits (# 4169) on :

I do love this Armstrong, though.

Posted by Timothy the Obscure (# 292) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Kelly Alves:
Actually, 'Spit valve' would have been edgier, and was the term I was really looking for. Bah.

There was just one other thing... He didn't like being called "Louie"--he always pronounced the "s".
But quotes file anyway.

Posted by mousethief (# 953) on :

quote:
Originally posted by lilBuddha:
...someone is likely to piss on your parachute and push.

Posted by leo (# 1458) on :

If I wasn't otherwise engaged, I'd turn up at Pyxe's church and do a miniature Pussy Riot rendering of 'All things bright and beautiful' during his sermon.

[ 26. August 2012, 08:16: Message edited by: leo ]

Posted by Patdys (# 9397) on :

If you are given a balaklava, just make sure it is not plastic and has air holes.

Posted by Anselmina (# 3032) on :

quote:
Originally posted by leo:
If I wasn't otherwise engaged, I'd turn up at Pyxe's church and do a miniature Pussy Riot rendering of 'All things bright and beautiful' during his sermon.

You know he'd only join in? In fact, he'd probably want an encore.

Posted by leo (# 1458) on :

Yes, I know - he'd tell the faithful that this act was part of the next phase of our diocesan strategy.

Posted by Pyx_e (# 57) on :

I still struggling with Leo/Pussy Riot occupying the same place in my head.

Does not compute.

Fly Safe. Pyx_e

Posted by mousethief (# 953) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Patdys:
If you are given a balaklava, just make sure it is not plastic and has air holes.

I read this too fast and saw "baklava" and couldn't for the life of me figure out why you'd want a Greek pastry with air holes, or who would try to serve you a plastic one.

Posted by Loquacious beachcomber (# 8783) on :

Hey, Pyx_e, have you thought about leaving old dead soul crooners alone to moulder into dust, and ranting about the Ship's transformation from jalepeno salsa to marshmallows on white bread, though a spate of relationship/people as commodities threads which somehow missed their rightful home in the Ship's chatroom???
There is a [Projectile]

thread about how to make friends (according to the Genesis creation account, you shape them from loose earth and breathe on them).
There is a [Projectile]

thread about how to make small talk (about which I will not comment further).
I mean, what's next, a thread about selecting suitable forms of gossip while painting one another's toenails?
Shiiiite!
[Projectile]

[ 27. August 2012, 00:58: Message edited by: Loquacious beachcomber ]

Posted by PeteC (# 10422) on :

Hsving fun, Beachbum?

Note the emoticons I used when I wrote this post?

Take a hint.

Posted by Cryptic (# 16917) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Kelly Alves:
You are not fit to sponge the dribble out of his water key.

and

Posted by The5thMary (# 12953) on :

Kelly, it's called a spit valve. And, if you'd like to hear a gross but funny true story about me and what I learned about spit valves, PM me! It's just gross, not R-rated! [Big Grin]

Posted by The5thMary (# 12953) on :

Apologies, once again! MY ADD is in full swing and I didn't see that someone had mentioned a spit valve. I simply must make time to read all the replies before I jump in to a discussion, trying so hard to be clever... [Frown]

Posted by Caissa (# 16710) on :

What sort of moron calls Louis Armstrong to hell?

Posted by Kelly Alves (# 2522) on :

Someone who's dedicated his life to refining and perfecting his moronhood to the shiny jewel it is today.

Posted by TomOfTarsus (# 3053) on :

Completely un-hellish post about Louis and the subject song:

I do a pretty mean imitation of ol' Satchmo, bless his heart. My mother loves it. My very shy, never-do-anything-to-attract-attention-to-yourself dearly beloved wife can find it funny in the proper context.

We were all going to an Easter buffet and I had to drop back in line to help my mother in from her car. Said song starts playing over the intercom. My wife turns three different shades of red and say to her mother (thru grinding teeth) "I'm gonna kill him! I'm just gonna kill him!"

Ok, everyone, as you were...

Tom

eta: With Kelly & Timothy, Satch is the man!

[ 27. August 2012, 17:30: Message edited by: TomOfTarsus ]

Posted by Pyx_e (# 57) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Caissa:
What sort of moron calls Louis Armstrong to hell?

What kinnda moron posts a literal remark on a joke thread?

Fly Safe, Pyx_e

(polished not perfected)

Posted by no prophet (# 15560) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Grits:
I do love this Armstrong, though.

I like this one better.

Posted by monkeylizard (# 952) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Grits:
I do love this Armstrong, though.

Which you'll need if you have this.

Posted by mousethief (# 953) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Pyx_e:

quote:
Originally posted by Caissa:
What sort of moron calls Louis Armstrong to hell?
What kinnda moron posts a literal remark on a joke thread?

What kind of moron thinks everybody will automatically know when they're joking?

Posted by Kelly Alves (# 2522) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Pyx_e:

quote:
Originally posted by Caissa:
What sort of moron calls Louis Armstrong to hell?
What kinnda moron posts a literal remark on a joke thread?

Fly Safe, Pyx_e

(polished not perfected)

I think the brother is trying to make you aware of the incredible karmic risk you put yourself in when you dog Satchmo, even in jest. A humbly whispered "Thank you" is your appropriate response.

Tremble lest the fickle spit valve of fate hover over your unworthy head.

(The spit valve of Damocles?)

[ 28. August 2012, 04:28: Message edited by: Kelly Alves ]

Posted by moron (# 206) on :

quote:
Originally posted by mousethief:

quote:
Originally posted by Pyx_e:

quote:
Originally posted by Caissa:
What sort of moron calls Louis Armstrong to hell?
What kinnda moron posts a literal remark on a joke thread?
What kind of moron thinks everybody will automatically know when they're joking?

Heaven only knows but if there is a Simmie this year for 'Thread title most likely to make you smile' whoever started this one wins.

[Overused]

Posted by Pyx_e (# 57) on :

quote:
Originally posted by mousethief:

quote:
Originally posted by Pyx_e:

quote:
Originally posted by Caissa:
What sort of moron calls Louis Armstrong to hell?
What kinnda moron posts a literal remark on a joke thread?
What kind of moron thinks everybody will automatically know when they're joking?

Firstly MT, piss off.

Secondly:

quote:
Pyx_e's thread has nothing to do with Louis, and everything to do with Lance.

Do try to keep up.

quote:
I considered a "RooKs Strong Arm Tactics" thread in Styx to round it off but by my estimation I'm 99 yards done on the 100 yd dash in Styx.

Both within the first half of the first page clearly indicate its a joke.

Get a grip you sullen, sniping sock-sniffer.

Fly safe, Pyx_e

Posted by Caissa (# 16710) on :

What sort of moron posts joke threads in Hell? [Ultra confused]

Posted by mousethief (# 953) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Pyx_e:
Firstly MT, piss off.

As you well know I shall not piss off. You are wasting oxygen. As you do every time you inhale.

quote:
Originally posted by Caissa:
What sort of moron posts joke threads in Hell?

Ordained morons.

[ 28. August 2012, 13:36: Message edited by: mousethief ]

Posted by Loquacious beachcomber (# 8783) on :

Please don't poke or pick on Py_xe; the silly sod is surprisingly sensitive. So, he sulks.
He can be wonderfully witty, happily hilarious, and unquestionably urbane.
Someday, I hope he will be, once again. Meantime, stow the sharp sticks where the sun seldom shines.

Oh, and mousethief, there are no ordained morons, the system weeds them out fairly early on.
You, for example, are not ordained, now are you?

Posted by PeteC (# 10422) on :

You're a moron, Beachbum. You're ordained, too.

I rest my case.

Posted by Loquacious beachcomber (# 8783) on :

Rest it? You left it on the bus!

Posted by Kelly Alves (# 2522) on :

quote:
Originally posted by TomOfTarsus:

I do a pretty mean imitation of ol' Satchmo, bless his heart.

Wanna hear something really weird? Me too. Used to, at least. Ever since I was nine or so, I would imitate him singing "Hello , Dolly." (I have a really deep voice.)

Posted by Pyx_e (# 57) on :

I once took a funeral (cremation; see last line) for a lady called Dolly, her family loved her very much and it was one of those special occasions we all hope our funerals will be.

They asked for "Hello Dolly" to be played on the way out, which struck me as lovely.

So as I am bowing to the altar it started to play, the lyrics were both poingant (and to me very funny). I hope they took my shoulder shakes as emotion not concealed laughter......

quote:
I said hello, dolly,......well, hello, Dolly, It's so nice to have you back where you belong ....

quickly followed by

quote:
You're lookin' swell, Dolly.......i can tell, Dolly You're still glowin'...

Fly Safe, Pyx_e

[ 28. August 2012, 19:12: Message edited by: Pyx_e ]

Posted by Kelly Alves (# 2522) on :

Oh, that's ghastly.

...
...

[Snigger]

Posted by Evensong (# 14696) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Pyx_e:
Fly Safe, Pyx_e

Are you recently assigned to the Air Force Pyx_e?

Posted by Chorister (# 473) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Evensong:

quote:
Originally posted by Pyx_e:
Fly Safe, Pyx_e
Are you recently assigned to the Air Force Pyx_e?

It's an
open secret.

Posted by Pyx_e (# 57) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Evensong:

quote:
Originally posted by Pyx_e:
Fly Safe, Pyx_e
Are you recently assigned to the Air Force Pyx_e?

quote:
When you are born you come out of your Mother's downstairs like a bullet out of a gun, smack into a brick wall 3 feet away. Make the most of the 3 feet.

Fly safe, Pyx_e

Posted by Evensong (# 14696) on :

I had a water birth myself.

Posted by mdijon (# 8520) on :

You went off like a dud then.

[ 29. August 2012, 13:08: Message edited by: mdijon ]

Posted by Evensong (# 14696) on :

I prefer to think of myself as a squib.

Posted by mdijon (# 8520) on :

A damp one.

Posted by Pyx_e (# 57) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Evensong:
I had a water birth myself.

Explains a lot.

Sink Safe, Pyx_e

Posted by beachcomber (# 17294) on :

I like Louis Armstrong across the board -

also newly discovered kowasaki.

I do.

[ 29. August 2012, 15:10: Message edited by: beachcomber ]

Posted by passer (# 13329) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Pyx_e:

quote:
Originally posted by Evensong:
I had a water birth myself.
Explains a lot.

Sink Safe, Pyx_e

Posted by Niteowl (# 15841) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Pyx_e:

So as I am bowing to the altar it started to play, the lyrics were both poingant (and to me very funny). I hope they took my shoulder shakes as emotion not concealed laughter......

quote:
I said hello, dolly,......well, hello, Dolly, It's so nice to have you back where you belong ....
quickly followed by

quote:
You're lookin' swell, Dolly.......i can tell, Dolly You're still glowin'...
Fly Safe, Pyx_e

If I'd been in attendance I'd have had a rough time not laughing - that goes right along with my sense of humor.

Posted by leo (# 1458) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Pyx_e:

quote:
Originally posted by Evensong:
I had a water birth myself.
Explains a lot.

Sink Safe, Pyx_e

SafeLY?

Posted by Evensong (# 14696) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Pyx_e:

quote:
Originally posted by Evensong:
I had a water birth myself.
Explains a lot.

Sink Safe, Pyx_e

Actually it was a large tub, not a sink. We're quite progressive here in Australia.

Posted by PeteC (# 10422) on :

Ok, Grammar nazis, bad jokes.

J'ai mon voyage (Enuf a dat)

Closed.

PeteC
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