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Source: (consider it)
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Thread: Getting to know you, at Church
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Percy B
Shipmate
# 17238
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Posted
Our church has quite a few people who do not know others in the church. Sometimes, of course, people don't want to mix, and that's OK.
However we'd like people to get to know others and we would like to facilitate this.
The congregation has quite a high degree of transience.
We want to build up Christian community and fellowship as an aim in 2013.
Does your church face this problem too?
How do you, or would you, tackle it?
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Mary, a priest??
Posts: 582 | From: Nudrug | Registered: Jul 2012
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Karl: Liberal Backslider
Shipmate
# 76
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Posted
What sort of church building and meeting/service do you have?
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Might as well ask the bloody cat.
Posts: 17938 | From: Chesterfield | Registered: May 2001
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Welease Woderwick
Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424
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Posted
At most Friends [Quaker] Meetings there are appointed Doorkeepers whose task it is to welcome people as they arrive - it's far easier to meet people then than afterwards when they are intent on beetling off. If people are met and greeted properly there is more chance of interaction after Meeting/Service/Mass or whatever.
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Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005
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Heavenly Anarchist
Shipmate
# 13313
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Posted
I go to a large church and that in itself can be a barrier to getting to know people. Here's a couple of things that might help in building a sense of community:
Community service - obviously this will depend on your size and demography. For instance, we have an annual weekend were church members go to a local estate and tidy it up, help the elderly repair fences etc. volunteers are assigned to teams so a good way of mixing people up. perhaps a church decorating project might be a start?
Social get togethers - themed events are good for us, also quiz nights, picnics etc.
Special interest groups - hobbies etc. I really want our church to start a textiles group and have found someone else who is also keen. Might be my project for the year.
Rotating coffee teams. My church bases the welcome team and coffee rota on the bible groups but re-organising these teams can build friendships. Obviously reliant on numbers and personalities though.
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Posts: 2831 | From: Trumpington | Registered: Jan 2008
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Spike
Mostly Harmless
# 36
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Posted
A church weekend away is a great way for people to get to know one another. At my church, we have an annual pilgrimage to Walsingham, but if that's not your thing, then there are plenty of retreat houses or Christian conference centres that can lay on a parish weekend.
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"May you get to heaven before the devil knows you're dead" - Irish blessing
Posts: 12860 | From: The Valley of Crocuses | Registered: May 2001
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Spike
Mostly Harmless
# 36
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by leo:
The church isn't a membership club.
Rather than derail this thread, I've responded to that here
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"May you get to heaven before the devil knows you're dead" - Irish blessing
Posts: 12860 | From: The Valley of Crocuses | Registered: May 2001
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Boogie
Boogie on down!
# 13538
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by leo:
The church isn't a membership club.
True, but fellowship matters - or we'd simply stay at home to worship.
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Garden. Room. Walk
Posts: 13030 | From: Boogie Wonderland | Registered: Mar 2008
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Dinghy Sailor
Ship's Jibsheet
# 8507
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Posted
Get everyone to wear name badges one Sunday. You can invent an excuse if you want - maybe it's a 'newcomer Sunday' so the badges are for the aid of the friends that people are supposed to bring along. However, the extra effect is that people will be able to note the names of everyone who they avoid because they don't feel their name, and feel too embarrassed to ask after all these years.
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Preach Christ, because this old humanity has used up all hopes and expectations, but in Christ hope lives and remains.
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Posts: 2821 | Registered: Sep 2004
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Ariel
Shipmate
# 58
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Boogie:
True, but fellowship matters - or we'd simply stay at home to worship.
Interesting - maybe this is more of an Anglican thing than a Catholic thing. In my experience church has almost always been simply a building where you went for the service. The few social groups there were mentioned on the noticeboard tend to be things like lectio divina, the Mothers' Union, St Vincent de Paul Group and so on.
Posts: 25445 | Registered: May 2001
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Belle Ringer
Shipmate
# 13379
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Ariel:
maybe this is more of an Anglican thing than a Catholic thing. In my experience church has almost always been simply a building where you went for the service.
Yes there are different concepts of what going to church is all about. For some it's for the individual goer to be served by the clergy in their unique role -- whether presiding at Eucharist or preaching the Word.
Others of us are taught regularly by clergy that church is not a building, it's not the clergy, church is the people, and learning to know and value and respond to each others needs and joys is an important aspect of being a church.
And others think people getting together to worship God at one specific time matters to God even if all the same worship behaviors can as easily take place in separate homes.
(And others think -- what am I missing?)
Posts: 5830 | From: Texas | Registered: Jan 2008
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Ultracrepidarian
Shipmate
# 9679
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Posted
We have been having a monthly meeting in the church building called 'Getting to Know You', where one member of the congregation gets up and gives a little talk about there life story, which is then followed by cheese and wine. It's been a nice way to get to hear some of the stories behind the faces that you see week on week. I like the way that the presentations haven't had much in the way of 'conversion stories', but have just touched on people's faith journeys in the context of the rest of their lives to date. Also, it's been fascinating to hear about the wide range of experiences that people have had, from being a school sports master in the 70s and 80s, to being an actress doing reps in London in the 50s and 60s.
Posts: 1897 | From: Cattle crossing | Registered: Jul 2005
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Karl: Liberal Backslider
Shipmate
# 76
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Ultracrepidarian:
a school sports master in the 70s and 80s.
Plenty to repent of there, then.
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Might as well ask the bloody cat.
Posts: 17938 | From: Chesterfield | Registered: May 2001
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leo
Shipmate
# 1458
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Boogie:
quote:
Originally posted by leo:
The church isn't a membership club.
True, but fellowship matters - or we'd simply stay at home to worship.
Depends what you mean by 'fellowship'. if you mean chatting to people about quotidian stuff, then that isn't what the New Testament understands by it.
If you mean sharing in Holy Communion, then that is why you can't do church on your own a home.
In an ever splintering society, it isn't hard to understand why people want their churches to create a sense of community. It follows, however, that people use their rotary clubs or whatever to do the same. Church then becomes one ' lifestyle choice' among many.
I think it is highly dangerous, to mission, for the church to replicate membership clubs because, thereby, it signs its/her own death warrant.
Maybe, to the OP, church 'members' could get to know each other by working on a common project for evangelisation - joining a campaign group like Amnesty and having letter writing evenings, for example.
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Baptist Trainfan
Shipmate
# 15128
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Karl: Liberal Backslider:
quote:
Originally posted by Ultracrepidarian:
a school sports master in the 70s and 80s.
Plenty to repent of there, then.
Depends on the school, surely? ![[Devil]](graemlins/devil.gif)
Mind you, all sports masters are, by definition, evil in my book. Especially when it's raining and they gleefully announce a Cross-country Run.
[ 28. December 2012, 15:17: Message edited by: Baptist Trainfan ]
Posts: 9750 | From: The other side of the Severn | Registered: Sep 2009
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poileplume
Shipmate
# 16438
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Posted
A very interesting thread, may I thank the posters. It fits neatly into the strategy I am working on for a suburban church.
Firstly may I state up front that there are some people who don’t want to be joiners. It is usually quite easy to identify them and leave them be.
But a key problem in modern society is isolation that can trend into loneliness. Isolation can be psychological rather than physical. This is in the sense that you may meet many people but there is no one you can really talk to. I would bring attention to two particular groups. 1) Men who don’t tend to share. 2) Elderly, especially the widowed whose families now often live too far away to visit regularly.
It is a particular problem in the suburban church because of the ‘everyone else seems to be having a good life but me’ syndrome that is prevalent in those leafy suburbs.
May I share a few experiences that may be helpful? Greeters are of course necessary but too often are seen as just people who hand out hymn books. What I have found is that you need to do an ‘encounter’ after the service (a horrible expression but cannot think of another).
A minister should make sure they speak to the person, as they may have a pressing problem. This is the reason that they have come to the church on that day.
Plus I do introductions, I talk to the person find out a bit about them then introduce them to someone with a similar background or interests.
You need to identify the people that are genuinely good with people and genuinely interested in people who don’t impose their views. Introduce the newcomers to these.
I remember a new family who joined the church just because they met a ninety year old lady was so ‘nice’. Similarly, you need to steer any newcomers away from the church bores.
The second experience is don’t jump on the person to find them a job in the church.
Please keep the postings coming - really usefull.
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Please note I am quite severely dyslexic
Posts: 319 | From: Quebec | Registered: May 2011
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Belle Ringer
Shipmate
# 13379
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Posted
Thinking of specific churches.
1. Church oriented groups. Altar guild, choir. I've never been in a choir that went for a beer after, a head of altar guild tried to have a party for the altar guild but almost none came. These task-focused groups have not been good ways to develop relationships.
One church has a quarterly work party to fix up the building and grounds, these include lunch, so there is an intentional social aspect.
2. Coffee hour. In one church there's a coffee after each service, with lots of nibble food like grapes and cheese -- lots of tables and chairs available, lasts 45 minutes to an hour.
In another church has one coffee between two of the three services, the goal is people from all three services will mix instead of being separate congregations, so there is no coffee after the 11 o'clock.
Mostly coffees are people who already know each other chatting together, but the longer ones have time to also gradually get to know others.
3. Study/prayer groups. If regular and highly participatory, people start to get to know each other. If they are dominated by a teacher or DVD, little interaction means not much chance of making friends.
4. Social service. One churches has a knitting/crocheting group making hats for premies, prayer shawls, etc., to be given away. Another has a monthly "fix up a poor person's house" group, they build a ramp for someone who needs a wheelchair, or build a roof for a house that has no roof (one man's roof was just a tarp).
4. Meal gathering. Most churches have a monthly meal social. In one church it's Foyer (groups of 10 to 12 at rotating homes), in another church it's 20 to 35 together at a restaurant but only married couples may attend. I know a church where 20 or 30 go out to eat together after church but it's not an official church function so it's not announced, you have to find out about it word of mouth.
5. Parties. A lot of churches do a one combined service and pot luck on 5th Sundays, some with special "entertainment" which could be a slide show of the activities of the year or could be the children choir singing. Some churches do Valentine's Day and other holiday social gatherings.
6. Targeting newcomers. One church has a "newcomers committee" which plans a social 3 times a year to which newcomers receive a mailed personal invitation and selected church members of parallel demographic are asked to come. The idea, an afternoon of interactive fun ("ice breaker" games), with some "people like you."
A different church has a required "newcomers class," 8 weeks of Sunday afternoons learning what the clergy gal calls "how we do things around here." Very interactive. By the time they all join the church in a group ceremony, they are good friends with their "class." (But I know people who left because they don't like that barrier to joining.)
I've met churches that do a monthly newcomers supper, I don't know if newcomers are invited once or for 6 months. For shy people, it takes more than one meeting to make connections.
Posts: 5830 | From: Texas | Registered: Jan 2008
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Lamb Chopped
Ship's kebab
# 5528
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Posted
We have at least one person whose ministry it is to do intentional introductions and linkups. So X will chat with Y, discover that Y is looking for a job / apartment / person to discuss Star Trek with, and then say, "hey, I know somebody who might be able to help / is in the same boat / etc" and takes them over to chat at coffee. After the new conversation is going like gangbusters, X slips away.
Rinse, repeat, until you've got a zillion cross connections.
Posts: 20059 | From: off in left field somewhere | Registered: Feb 2004
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Belle Ringer
Shipmate
# 13379
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Lamb Chopped:
We have at least one person whose ministry it is to do intentional introductions and linkups. So X will chat with Y, discover that Y is looking for a job / apartment / person to discuss Star Trek with, and then say, "hey, I know somebody who might be able to help / is in the same boat / etc" and takes them over to chat at coffee. After the new conversation is going like gangbusters, X slips away.
Rinse, repeat, until you've got a zillion cross connections.
Interesting, we are talking about having "coffee shepherds" to notice who is not chatting with anyone, go chat with them and then get them introduced to someone with some similar interests. No volunteers yet to be shepherds, but the idea is very new. Takes someone who knows a lot of people and is naturally outgoing about starting a conversation with a stranger.
Posts: 5830 | From: Texas | Registered: Jan 2008
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Bagpuss
Magical saggy cloth cat
# 2925
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Dinghy Sailor:
Get everyone to wear name badges one Sunday. You can invent an excuse if you want - maybe it's a 'newcomer Sunday' so the badges are for the aid of the friends that people are supposed to bring along. However, the extra effect is that people will be able to note the names of everyone who they avoid because they don't feel their name, and feel too embarrassed to ask after all these years.
I really like this - I am a curate at 2 churches and 6 months on there are loads of people I know by sight but do not have a clue who they are are - I would also add on the name badge Bob (married to Betty, Liz's dad) - I hadn't worked out several married couples until I bumped into them in the supermarket!
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St. Gwladys
Shipmate
# 14504
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Posted
After church coffee!
Seriously, it's a good way to get to know people. We are quite fortunate in having a reasonably small church - so new comers are obvious - and a seperate church hall. New comers can be specifically invited over to the hall for coffee, and we have a couple of people who have the gift of talking to new comers and introducing them to others. At certain times of year they can then be invited to other things - such as the church bonfire night party - all fairly non threatening but a way of making people welcome, which is why most visitors have found us friendly.
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"Careful what you say sir, we're on board ship here"
From "New York Girls", Steeleye Span, Commoners Crown (Voiced by Peter Sellers)
Posts: 3333 | From: Rhymney Valley, South Wales | Registered: Jan 2009
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Percy B
Shipmate
# 17238
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Posted
This is really helpful, thank you.
Some of the ideas are fantastic and I am sure we can think over them and adapt if necessary to our local situation.
One of our issues is a significant number of people coming from different countries, we have many different cultural backgrounds among us, and as I say transience is significant in this relatively under privileged area.
So I suspect its the here and now things to help us get to know each other that would help, rather than say an event / weekend too far away in time. Although I am sure it's both ... And... Rather than either...or...
Some of our people, especially one or two who live in the community with mental health problems crave companionship, and the presence of another.
I like the idea of becoming what we receive - a holy communion, and, for me, that means welcoming and accepting those who come through the door and worship with us, and allowing God to form us into Christian community where we are.
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Mary, a priest??
Posts: 582 | From: Nudrug | Registered: Jul 2012
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Percy B
Shipmate
# 17238
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Posted
PS
I would like to add, to clarify, our aim at helping people to get to know one another a little better is nothing to do with membership of a club. We are too diverse and transient to attempt that, even if we wished too.
We believe some of our people would benefit pastorally from the friendship they would receive from some of our people. And that would be two way.
This isn't about pastoral ministers or whatever, but simply about kindly words, simple friendship and what it can bring to someone new to our country, someone recently released from prison, someone relatively alone in the community with mental health issues.
And so our 'getting to know you' in a way encourages and supports mission.
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Mary, a priest??
Posts: 582 | From: Nudrug | Registered: Jul 2012
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Moo
Ship's tough old bird
# 107
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Percy B:
One of our issues is a significant number of people coming from different countries, we have many different cultural backgrounds among us, and as I say transience is significant in this relatively under privileged area.
Could you get the members of the different cultural groups to give some sort of presentation showing some aspect of their culture? I don't mean anything like formal speeches, but performing music or dance, or describing how Christmas and other religious festivals are celebrated in their homelands. I think many people in the audience would find it very interesting and enjoyable.
Moo
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Posts: 20365 | From: Alleghany Mountains of Virginia | Registered: May 2001
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poileplume
Shipmate
# 16438
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Posted
Another advantage of having people managing social interaction at the coffee sessions and such, ‘coffee shepherds’, is that they get wired into all the chat and gossip.
Therefore they can then act as feedback, especially for the silent majority who only vote with their feet. “They don’t like the hymns”, “That sermon was good”, “Mrs Smith is having problems, worth a pastoral visit” etc.
It’s a sort of market research combined with an informal representative of the people role.
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Please note I am quite severely dyslexic
Posts: 319 | From: Quebec | Registered: May 2011
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Spike
Mostly Harmless
# 36
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by St. Gwladys:
After church coffee!
Seriously, it's a good way to get to know people. We are quite fortunate in having a reasonably small church - so new comers are obvious - and a seperate church hall. New comers can be specifically invited over to the hall for coffee, and we have a couple of people who have the gift of talking to new comers and introducing them to others. At certain times of year they can then be invited to other things - such as the church bonfire night party - all fairly non threatening but a way of making people welcome, which is why most visitors have found us friendly.
It sounds like you've got it right. Sadly, too many churches get it wrong and simply think that "after church coffee" is all it needs to try and look welcoming. What happens all too often is that small groups of people who already know each other huddle together making it very difficult for newcomers to penetrate. All too often, they aren't even aware of this and, if asked, would describe themselves as a "welcoming" church and would be shocked and upset if the truth was pointed out to them.
[ 29. December 2012, 08:47: Message edited by: Spike ]
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"May you get to heaven before the devil knows you're dead" - Irish blessing
Posts: 12860 | From: The Valley of Crocuses | Registered: May 2001
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Ethne Alba
Shipmate
# 5804
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Posted
lots of interesting possibilities
guess i'd say: Keep it Simple.
There is nothing like an everso slightly desperate plea for people to meet and mingle... to put folk off altogether.
If you do go down the coffee after church route, could i suggest that easy going souls Only are allowed to wash up and lock up afterwards? There's nothing worse than having a lovely leisurely chat&brew interupted with Mrs Damp Tea Towel hovering and snapping " Have you finished with that yet, i've got a home to go to"
![[Frown]](frown.gif)
Posts: 3126 | Registered: Apr 2004
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daisydaisy
Shipmate
# 12167
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Posted
Would decent coffee help too? And maybe the knowledge that there Is a biscuit or cake? Some churches offer sherry.
I like the idea of "coffee shepherds" - at so many after-worship coffees it's really difficult for a newcomer to get into conversation when there are huddles of people who already know one-another - although this still relies on the existing people to chat once the newcomer has been introduced (this can be a challenge).
Posts: 3184 | From: southern uk | Registered: Dec 2006
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Uncle Pete
Loyaute me lie
# 10422
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Posted
I tend to agree with Spike. In my current parish, there are cliques.
For the cliques we have always with us.
But after a year of rearranging my schedule so that I could attend coffee hour (and snarling at little kids who return to the cookie trays many more times than is good for them ![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif) ), attending a few parish socials and fund raisers, as well as the annual meeting, I am no longer quite so invisible. And people do remember my name.
And I discover that I am missed when I am not there, too.
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Even more so than I was before
Posts: 20466 | From: No longer where I was | Registered: Sep 2005
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Pia
Shipmate
# 17277
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by PeteC:
[...] (and snarling at little kids who return to the cookie trays many more times than is good for them ) [...]
Aah! I see you've met my daughter... ![[Biased]](wink.gif)
I really like the 'coffee shepherds' idea. I think where I go some people do this naturally (i.e. they are just good at noticing newcomers and striking up conversation) but it's a good idea, because for people who are shy the idea of drinking coffee alone among huddles of people who already know one another is a hideous one, but it can only take one friendly chat to make a huge difference. (Sez the voice of experience...!)
Posts: 151 | Registered: Aug 2012
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poileplume
Shipmate
# 16438
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Posted
The coffee shepherds also evolve into people who grease the wheels subtly: the church ‘fixers’.
They know who needs a lift or who to ask if the church needs a favour. Plus ideal for passing on information or reminding people especially via the informal network.
You need at least two, as one can get bogged down with an individual and the other then takes over the circulating amongst the masses role.
On practical adman; do you have a master/mistress of ceremonies? Absolutely essential to take the pressure off the harassed celebrants.
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Please note I am quite severely dyslexic
Posts: 319 | From: Quebec | Registered: May 2011
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geroff
Shipmate
# 3882
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Posted
Decent coffee is a novel concept for most churches.
Bagpuss - don't worry here we are two and a half years on and not knowing who goes with who.
We visited a church in London a few years ago and they had the flags of all the countries represented by their members hanging in the nave.
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"The first principle in science is to invent something nice to look at and then decide what it can do." Rowland Emett 1906-1990
Posts: 1172 | From: Montgomeryshire, Wales | Registered: Jan 2003
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Belle Ringer
Shipmate
# 13379
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Spike:
quote:
Originally posted by St. Gwladys:
After church coffee!...
... What happens all too often is that small groups of people who already know each other huddle together making it very difficult for newcomers to penetrate. All too often, they aren't even aware of this and, if asked, would describe themselves as a "welcoming" church and would be shocked and upset if the truth was pointed out to them.
Shocked and aggressively deny it. People simply do not accept a report that their church failed to be welcoming to someone. For two reasons. 1. It's not their experience; when they walk into church or coffee they are warmly greeted (by their friends) so of course everyone is warmly greeted. 2. It's not what they want to think their church is like.
Really tricky to get through to people that the church is failing to be welcoming to some people, and get focused on what changes can be made to remedy that. If the problem is acknowledged it's likely justified "of course people are spending time with friends they haven't see all week!" instead of admission things could improve.
Posts: 5830 | From: Texas | Registered: Jan 2008
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ArachnidinElmet
Shipmate
# 17346
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Posted
Post-mass coffee? ![[Disappointed]](graemlins/disappointed.gif)
Post-mass bacon butties.
In all seriousness, even people who don't come and join in seem to find the fact that breakfast sandwiches are available welcoming and it provides a talking point to newcomers.
Also regarding food and people of other nationalities: themed dinner nights. We have had successful Spanish, Italian, Hungarian and even Tanzanian evenings that are very useful for inviting partners or friends who are not normally church-going.
I'd definitely agree with welcomers. They provide a good information point for those who are nervous of approaching the priest.
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'If a pleasant, straight-forward life is not possible then one must try to wriggle through by subtle manoeuvres' - Kafka
Posts: 1887 | From: the rhubarb triangle | Registered: Sep 2012
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Heavenly Anarchist
Shipmate
# 13313
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by geroff:
We visited a church in London a few years ago and they had the flags of all the countries represented by their members hanging in the nave.
We also have many flags as we are a multi-national church. Themed nights have been helpful at introducing different communities to each other in greater depth and the food has also been excellent ![[Smile]](smile.gif)
I'm liking this idea of coffee shepherds too.
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'I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.' Douglas Adams
Dog Activity Monitor
My shop
Posts: 2831 | From: Trumpington | Registered: Jan 2008
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mrs whibley
Shipmate
# 4798
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by geroff:
Decent coffee is a novel concept for most churches.
Bagpuss - don't worry here we are two and a half years on and not knowing who goes with who.
We visited a church in London a few years ago and they had the flags of all the countries represented by their members hanging in the nave.
Re: Who goes with who. I've been in my church for about 5 years, and have only relatively recently got to know people outside my housegroup - mainly my own fault as I've kept myself to myself. Mostly I've now got to know people by doing church jobs such as coffee-making and welcoming with them - even though we're with the same people on the rotas every month there are so many swaps that I've got to know many more. Anyhow, a couple of months ago it was decided to expand the scope and size of the weekly intimation sheet. To keep printing costs under control it was decreed that couples/families should have one sheet between them (presumably even if they arrived separately because someone was parking/dropping off children etc.). Friends arriving together needed a sheet each. Therefore a certain amount of psychic ability was instantly required of the welcomers... Of course the people making this rule knew exactly who was married to whom ![[Roll Eyes]](rolleyes.gif)
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I long for a faith that is gloriously treacherous - Mike Yaconelli
Posts: 942 | From: North Lincolnshire | Registered: Aug 2003
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Curious
Shipmate
# 93
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Posted
Never underestimate the importance of older congregational members in helping to get to know people.
In a previous congregation we had an older member with mobility difficulties. When she arrived at church she would look to see if there was anyone new, position herself near them and then ask them to help her to the communion rail. Very few people refused and she used it as a way into conversation after the service.
(Mind you, she also had a bit of an eye for any male newcomer......)
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Erin - you are missed more than you could know. Rest in peace and rise in glory - to provide unrest in the heavenly realms.
Posts: 1372 | From: Betwixt and between | Registered: May 2001
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Belle Ringer
Shipmate
# 13379
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Posted
On the name tags thing, really important that people see the "church leaders" wearing name tags. If the organist, choir director, Sunday school teacher, altar guild ladies, coffee hostess aren't all wearing name tags, few others will. People follow examples. "Everyone knows who I am" has to be visibly not a valid reason to not wear a name tag.
One church has a name tag rack at the entrance to the sanctuary. At the entrance to the coffee hall there's a big bowl to toss the name tag into. Someone during the week rehangs the tags in alpha order at the entrance to the sanctuary. Others keep their name tag in their car.
Posts: 5830 | From: Texas | Registered: Jan 2008
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Ariel
Shipmate
# 58
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Posted
YMMV, but I absolutely hate events where you have to wear name tags. I always take mine off and lose it as soon as I decently can.
I suppose it depends where you wear it but not everyone likes having a name tag on their chest and having people peer at it. (And if one of them is a creepy guy I especially don't want him knowing my name.) But as I said, YMMV.
Posts: 25445 | Registered: May 2001
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Ariel:
I absolutely hate events where you have to wear name tags.
Where's Emily Dickinson when we need her so badly?
I don't like to wear them either. When people ask me why I don't wear one, I tell them it's a sin of pride.
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"I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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Sioni Sais
Shipmate
# 5713
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Amanda B. Reckondwythe:
quote:
Originally posted by Ariel:
I absolutely hate events where you have to wear name tags.
Where's Emily Dickinson when we need her so badly?
I don't like to wear them either. When people ask me why I don't wear one, I tell them it's a sin of pride.
I would suggest that those who have some role at the meeting wear badges, showing their name and their role. Rude remarks about coffee/music/flowers will be less likely to be made to those who could take offence.
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"He isn't Doctor Who, he's The Doctor"
(Paul Sinha, BBC)
Posts: 24276 | From: Newport, Wales | Registered: Apr 2004
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Zacchaeus
Shipmate
# 14454
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Posted
I think there may be a pond difference with name tags, it seems to be something that the American side of the pond is more comfortable with.
I have never met a church congregation in England (I won't speak for the rest of the UK) who would be comfortable with wearign labels..
Posts: 1905 | From: the back of beyond | Registered: Jan 2009
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Belle Ringer
Shipmate
# 13379
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Zacchaeus:
I think there may be a pond difference with name tags, it seems to be something that the American side of the pond is more comfortable with.
I have never met a church congregation in England (I won't speak for the rest of the UK) who would be comfortable with wearing labels..
At an extended family reunion an uncle refused to wear a name tag in the grounds everyone knows him. I asked "do all the next generation's in-laws know you?" He put on his name tag.
The theory of the churches I've gone to is name tags help us associate name with face without the embarrassment of having to say "we've sat next to each other in church a dozen times and been in Bible class together but I don't remember your name." Picture directories serve a similar purpose. Apparently MANY people have trouble putting names and faces together, but it's socially unacceptable to admit "I don't remember your name."
Posts: 5830 | From: Texas | Registered: Jan 2008
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Zacchaeus
Shipmate
# 14454
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Posted
The logic in what you say is undeniable, however getting most English congregations to wear name tags would probably be impossible...
Posts: 1905 | From: the back of beyond | Registered: Jan 2009
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Boogie
Boogie on down!
# 13538
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Zacchaeus:
The logic in what you say is undeniable, however getting most English congregations to wear name tags would probably be impossible...
We had our 40th Church anniversary recently and had visitors from far and wide - all were happy to wear name labels.
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Garden. Room. Walk
Posts: 13030 | From: Boogie Wonderland | Registered: Mar 2008
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Zacchaeus
Shipmate
# 14454
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Posted
A special event is not the same as a weekly service though..
Posts: 1905 | From: the back of beyond | Registered: Jan 2009
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Dinghy Sailor
Ship's Jibsheet
# 8507
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Zacchaeus:
A special event is not the same as a weekly service though..
No, but the original suggestion of name tags (by me) was for a special event. You don't need them every week, just every once in a while so that people can make a point of targeting all the people they embarrassingly don't know.
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Preach Christ, because this old humanity has used up all hopes and expectations, but in Christ hope lives and remains.
Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Posts: 2821 | Registered: Sep 2004
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Zacchaeus
Shipmate
# 14454
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Dinghy Sailor:
quote:
Originally posted by Zacchaeus:
A special event is not the same as a weekly service though..
No, but the original suggestion of name tags (by me) was for a special event. You don't need them every week, just every once in a while so that people can make a point of targeting all the people they embarrassingly don't know.
True - Sorry I'd been replying to this post by Belleringer.
quote:
On the name tags thing, really important that people see the "church leaders" wearing name tags. If the organist, choir director, Sunday school teacher, altar guild ladies, coffee hostess aren't all wearing name tags, few others will. People follow examples. "Everyone knows who I am" has to be visibly not a valid reason to not wear a name tag.
One church has a name tag rack at the entrance to the sanctuary. At the entrance to the coffee hall there's a big bowl to toss the name tag into. Someone during the week rehangs the tags in alpha order at the entrance to the sanctuary. Others keep their name tag in their car.
Posts: 1905 | From: the back of beyond | Registered: Jan 2009
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geroff
Shipmate
# 3882
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Posted
Rather than name tags have job tags - or even just coloured tags. You can then have a note on your service sheet or at the door saying "if you need help or have a question ask someone who is wearing a yellow badge".
This strikes me as a typical Anglican compromise but hey..
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"The first principle in science is to invent something nice to look at and then decide what it can do." Rowland Emett 1906-1990
Posts: 1172 | From: Montgomeryshire, Wales | Registered: Jan 2003
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Heavenly Anarchist
Shipmate
# 13313
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Posted
Our welcome team and whoever is leading the service wear pink lanyards and this is pointed out during the notices. We also have welcome packs for visitors who feel brave enough to put their hands up during collection, this identifies visitors to the welcome team.
St Helen's had a welcome desk and it was a popular point, especially in the summer when people came looking for the accommodation book. I recruited housemates there who went on to be good friends. But this was a big church with an evening service full of young singles so that made things far easier as we constantly had new people.
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'I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.' Douglas Adams
Dog Activity Monitor
My shop
Posts: 2831 | From: Trumpington | Registered: Jan 2008
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