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Source: (consider it)
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Thread: Top Tips for worship leaders (and other public speaking situations)
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Snags
Utterly socially unrealistic
# 15351
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Posted
I'm sure lots of us have been there, and after last night I feel the need to hear about the experiences of others in those "unfortunate moments".
So, to set the ball rolling, my latest Top Tip:
When doing a necessarily spontaneous prayer for Christians Against Poverty, decide whether to say their name in full, or use the acronym. Do not, under any circumstances, start to say it in full then change horses to the acronym part-way through just to 'mix it up a bit'.
Giving thanks for "all the lives touched by Chr.AP" is not conducive to an appropriately worshipful atmosphere, even if you do catch yourself before enunciating it fully.
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Vain witterings :-: Vain pretentions :-: The Dog's Blog(locks)
Posts: 1399 | From: just north of That London | Registered: Dec 2009
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geroff
Shipmate
# 3882
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Posted
I can think of quite a lot to say to those who call themselves Worship Leaders, but heaven is just not the place.....
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"The first principle in science is to invent something nice to look at and then decide what it can do." Rowland Emett 1906-1990
Posts: 1172 | From: Montgomeryshire, Wales | Registered: Jan 2003
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Snags
Utterly socially unrealistic
# 15351
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Posted
<sigh>
Service leader/praying in public/whatever the hell you want to call the role.
The title wasn't really important (and as it happens it's not one I like either), just a handy peg to hang things off without making it longer than the post itself.
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Vain witterings :-: Vain pretentions :-: The Dog's Blog(locks)
Posts: 1399 | From: just north of That London | Registered: Dec 2009
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Boogie
Boogie on down!
# 13538
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Snags:
Giving thanks for "all the lives touched by Chr.AP" is not conducive to an appropriately worshipful atmosphere, even if you do catch yourself before enunciating it fully.
My question - why do you feel the need for a particular 'atmosphere'?
I think this thread may well end up in Purg - to contentious a subject for heaven!
![[Smile]](smile.gif)
[ 28. January 2013, 12:57: Message edited by: Boogie ]
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Garden. Room. Walk
Posts: 13030 | From: Boogie Wonderland | Registered: Mar 2008
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Snags
Utterly socially unrealistic
# 15351
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Posted
OK, it was meant to be an opportunity for people to self-humiliate with unfortunate spoken-word moments.
I have neither the time, energy, or inclination to get into a wank-fest on nomenclature or to dance the merry jig of the jerking-knee.
I apologise that the OP was obviously insufficiently clear in its intention of providing light relief, rather than a source of never-ending heated circular argument, and will now crawl back to work having failed at something else.
Thank you for your time.
![[Biased]](wink.gif)
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Vain witterings :-: Vain pretentions :-: The Dog's Blog(locks)
Posts: 1399 | From: just north of That London | Registered: Dec 2009
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Thyme
Shipmate
# 12360
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Posted
Here's mine - a personal selection:
- Keep it short - less words is more meaningful and less likely to lead to embarrassment. Especially when speaking extempore.
- Please do not tell us what the scripture or hymn says before it is read or sung. This spoils the surprise.
- Over the last two thousand years the Holy Spirit has inspired lots of very talented people to write beautiful prayers covering just about everything we need to pray for or can be suitably adapted. The main denominations have comprehensive authorised prayers and liturgucal material. Google is your friend. Use them.
- Few of us can pray beautiful meaningful prayers extempore. Learn a few suitable all purpose ones for times when you cannot prepare. Or carry a small notebook with you at all times.
- Banish the word 'just' from your vocabulary unless using it in the context of justice.
- Silence is your friend. See first item on the list. When announcing a time of silence please be silent do not continue your speaking telling us what God is saying to us in the silence. Let the silence be longer than 5 seconds. Do not let the musicians/organist tune their instruments or play extempore during the silence or the catering team rattle their trollies and teacups. Say roughly how long it will last and not to worry as you will signal the end with a short prayer.
![[Devil]](graemlins/devil.gif)
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The Church in its own bubble has become, at best the guardian of the value system of the nation’s grandparents, and at worst a den of religious anoraks defined by defensiveness, esoteric logic and discrimination. Bishop of Buckingham's blog
Posts: 600 | From: Cloud Cuckoo Land | Registered: Feb 2007
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Thyme
Shipmate
# 12360
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Posted
Oh, I forgot,
mumbling away with your chin in your chest is not a demonstration of your extreme humility.
It makes it impossible to hear you, especially for the hearing challenged.
Head up and speak up clearly and a bit slower than normal.
Although there have been many times when I have given thanks for the lack of hearing.
Sorry. I seem to have got a bit carried away. I think I will have some camomile tea or something and a lie down. ![[Hot and Hormonal]](icon_redface.gif)
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The Church in its own bubble has become, at best the guardian of the value system of the nation’s grandparents, and at worst a den of religious anoraks defined by defensiveness, esoteric logic and discrimination. Bishop of Buckingham's blog
Posts: 600 | From: Cloud Cuckoo Land | Registered: Feb 2007
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Jen.
Godless Liberal
# 3131
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Posted
- Ensure you turn the radio mic on when it is time to speak
- Ensure you turn the mic off again when you are done/it is time to sing/when you go to the loo.
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Was Jenny Ann, but fancied being more minimal.
Posts: 5318 | From: Manchester, England | Registered: Aug 2002
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Lucia
Looking for light
# 15201
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Posted
Not my own but a memorable story told of our Rector at his retirement party. That he was recalled to have made an unfortunate Spoonerism during a talk when talking about the 'crowds clapping'... reducing many to giggles!
Posts: 1075 | From: Nigh golden stone and spires | Registered: Oct 2009
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cattyish
Wuss in Boots
# 7829
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Posted
Remember you're supposed to be doing it. Last time I had to extemporise because the minister called on me to pray and I thought I was on the following week. Oops. It was fine, by the way, God was good enough to let me get away with it.
When singing something without the music in front of you, don't learn two versions of the words then mix them up between verses. I have only sung a solo once in church. Perhaps this is why!
I have to agree with the "don't interrupt the silence" bit. Also, it occurs to me that music playing underneath speech is difficult enough to hear through in my kitchen on the TV with the sound turned right up. It must be terrible to try to pick out speech from music in an echoey sanctuary. Maybe speech on its own, then music on its own is better for clarity.
Mostly, I think the "It's not about me" thing is important.
Cattyish, finding this interesting. Please keep it going!
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...to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived, this is to have succeeded.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
Posts: 1794 | From: Scotland | Registered: Jul 2004
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Baptist Trainfan
Shipmate
# 15128
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Jenny Ann:
- Ensure you turn the radio mic on when it is time to speak
- Ensure you turn the mic off again when you are done/it is time to sing/when you go to the loo.
From a different tradition to mine, make sure it's turned off before you hear Confessions - although that could be entertaining.
And keep on good elationships with the person twiddling the knobs on the PA system, as they have the power to destroy you. ("Techies" in the theatre would never spoil a performance for the paying public - but I have it on good authority that they have certain ways of making life more difficult for obnoxious performers who throw their weight around ...
[ 28. January 2013, 14:50: Message edited by: Baptist Trainfan ]
Posts: 9750 | From: The other side of the Severn | Registered: Sep 2009
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Adeodatus
Shipmate
# 4992
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Posted
One of my written-on-my-memory-in-letters-of-fire rules: if the children are bored, so are the adults, but they're just too polite to show it.
quote:
Originally posted by Snags:
"all the lives touched by Chr.AP"
Erm ... can I just ask how you would pronounce the acronym "Chr.AP"?
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"What is broken, repair with gold."
Posts: 9779 | From: Manchester | Registered: Sep 2003
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Baptist Trainfan
Shipmate
# 15128
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Posted
In view of the fact that CAP are dealing with people who have come to the very bottom of life's barrel, the obvious pronounciation would seem quite appropriate.
But perhaps one inserts a glottal stop at the point marked by the full-stop.
[ 28. January 2013, 15:19: Message edited by: Baptist Trainfan ]
Posts: 9750 | From: The other side of the Severn | Registered: Sep 2009
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Baptist Trainfan
Shipmate
# 15128
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by cattyish:
It occurs to me that music playing underneath speech is difficult enough to hear through in my kitchen on the TV with the sound turned right up. It must be terrible to try to pick out speech from music in an echoey sanctuary. Maybe speech on its own, then music on its own is better for clarity.
This is a real problem on videos that are produced by denominations or missionary societies with a view to them being shown in church. I have often complained about it (to be fair, our denomination now includes optional subtitles).
Posts: 9750 | From: The other side of the Severn | Registered: Sep 2009
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venbede
Shipmate
# 16669
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Posted
Since you ask, I don't like being told how I feel. I don't respect someone telling God how I'm meant to feel either.
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Man was made for joy and woe;
And when this we rightly know,
Thro' the world we safely go.
Posts: 3201 | From: An historic market town nestling in the folds of Surrey's rolling North Downs, | Registered: Sep 2011
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Kitten
Shipmate
# 1179
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Jenny Ann:
- Ensure you turn the radio mic on when it is time to speak
- Ensure you turn the mic off again when you are done/it is time to sing/when you go to the loo.
I control it from the sound desk in my Church, I hand it to the preacher already switched on and forbid them to touch the switch
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Maius intra qua extra
Never accept a ride from a stranger, unless they are in a big blue box
Posts: 2330 | From: Carmarthenshire | Registered: Aug 2001
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Schroedinger's cat
Ship's cool cat
# 64
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Posted
My tip is remember that no-one is there to hear you. The less you say the better. If you can get through the whole service without saying more than half a dozen words, people will be grateful.
When in doubt, STFU.
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Blog
Music for your enjoyment
Lord may all my hard times be healing times
take out this broken heart and renew my mind.
Posts: 18859 | From: At the bottom of a deep dark well. | Registered: May 2001
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John Holding
Coffee and Cognac
# 158
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Posted
Tip: Breathe. Take at least one breath between prayers, or after a psalm or hymn.
This past autumn I took the liberty of saying this to the nice young man who had just presided at the wedding of my daughter. He had concluded the service with the following blessing -- one sentence, so to speak --
"...bless you in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit Amen please remember to find the appropriate parking when you arrive at the reception."
John
Posts: 5929 | From: Ottawa, Canada | Registered: May 2001
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ElaineC
Shipmate
# 12244
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Kitten:
quote:
Originally posted by Jenny Ann:
- Ensure you turn the radio mic on when it is time to speak
- Ensure you turn the mic off again when you are done/it is time to sing/when you go to the loo.
I control it from the sound desk in my Church, I hand it to the preacher already switched on and forbid them to touch the switch
I wish we had a sound desk with an operator as I have to plead utility to the offence of forgetting the mic.
I was fine throughout my training, but as soon as that blue scarf went round my neck things have gone to pot.
I put it down to the brand new tailor made cassock I treated myself to as the control box doesn't dig me in the ribs as it did before. It's now in the pocket as opposed to hooked onto a belt.
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Music is the only language in which you cannot say a mean or sarcastic thing. John Erskine
Posts: 464 | From: Orpington, Kent, UK | Registered: Jan 2007
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Laurelin
Shipmate
# 17211
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Posted
When leading intercessions, keep them short and sweet and to the point. Short and sweet is beautiful. The Holy Spirit is not impressed by holy-sounding verbiage, in my humble opinion.
And do not use intercessions to push a particular agenda of your own (owwwww). Do not preach a blinkin' mini-sermon.
I worship at a church where quite a few folk feel free to raise their hands during worship, including me. Folk who are not comfortable doing this themselves, for whatever reason, should not be pressured into doing so. There is room for us all in the house of God. I appreciate high-octane, exuberant worship but I value silence and contemplation every bit as much (if not more so).
I'm a Reader in the CoE and also often lead worship with our music group, so I am used to the potential pitfalls of leading worship and the prime importance of getting the heck out of the way so that God's word is heard and His presence felt.
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"I fear that to me Siamese cats belong to the fauna of Mordor." J.R.R. Tolkien
Posts: 545 | From: The Shire | Registered: Jul 2012
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birdie
fowl
# 2173
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Posted
This wasn't an 'in front of the whole church' thing, but it is still seared on my memory...
In my last church, communion was a fairly informal affair - a 'get into groups and share the bread and wine between you' type job. Often with freshly baked bread (that bit's important). Some people as they passed the bread and wine, simply said 'bless you'; others used a more formal wording. Either of these is fine, but, for the love of all that is holy, I appeal to you never to try and combne the two, or you risk saying, as an elder once did to me:
"The body of Christ, broken for you. It's still warm!"
![[Eek!]](eek.gif)
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"Gentlemen, I wash my hands of this weirdness."
Captain Jack Sparrow
Posts: 1290 | From: the edge | Registered: Jan 2002
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Zacchaeus
Shipmate
# 14454
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Posted
When you are leading the Lord's prayer, don't get mixed up between versions, moving from one to another..
Posts: 1905 | From: the back of beyond | Registered: Jan 2009
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AberVicar
Mornington Star
# 16451
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Posted
As my father taught me (repeatedly!):
Stand up; speak up; and shut up.
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Before you diagnose yourself with depression or low self-esteem, make sure you are not, in fact, just surrounded by assholes.
Posts: 742 | From: Abertillery | Registered: May 2011
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birdie
fowl
# 2173
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by AberVicar:
As my father taught me (repeatedly!):
Stand up; speak up; and shut up.
This is sound advice in so many areas of life.
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"Gentlemen, I wash my hands of this weirdness."
Captain Jack Sparrow
Posts: 1290 | From: the edge | Registered: Jan 2002
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Gill H
Shipmate
# 68
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Posted
Snags - our church is a CAP centre and I can imagine this happening there ... actually I think they would love it! Thanks.
It's not as good as the famous 'pitch his tents' one though (is that still linked on the front page?)
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*sigh* We can’t all be Alan Cresswell.
- Lyda Rose
Posts: 9313 | From: London | Registered: May 2001
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Lord Jestocost
Shipmate
# 12909
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Posted
1. Bridges (as in the musical devices) that have no discernible relationship to the tune that people have just been singing are intended for performances of songs. When the congregation is trying to sing along, they kill the song dead.
2. Just because this song slayed the crowd at Let God Spring into Royal Acts of Harvest Growth, backed by a professional band and sound team, does not mean it will sound good in our local church.
3. Just because the songbook says verse 2 goes "Siyahamba ekukhanyen kwenkhos" does not mean you should actually try to sing it, or indeed that it is singable.
I'm spotting a theme. I'll shut up now.
Posts: 761 | From: The Instrumentality of Man | Registered: Aug 2007
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The Intrepid Mrs S
Shipmate
# 17002
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Posted
DON'T APOLOGISE BEFORE YOU EVEN START.
One of our house groups led evening service on Sunday and the first thing the leader said was to the effect that they'd never done it before so please be patient with them. They were FINE. Don't set yourself up to fail before you even start.
Oh and another vote for the removal of 'just' from prayer vocabulary. It's like equations in the written word - you audience drops off by 50% with every one!
Mrs. S, Grumpy Old Woman of this parish
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Don't get your knickers in a twist over your advancing age. It achieves nothing and makes you walk funny.
Prayer should be our first recourse, not our last resort
'Lord, please give us patience. NOW!'
Posts: 1464 | From: Neither here nor there | Registered: Mar 2012
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Moo
Ship's tough old bird
# 107
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by The Intrepid Mrs S:
Oh and another vote for the removal of 'just' from prayer vocabulary.
These prayers are known as the prayers of the just.
Moo
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Kerygmania host
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See you later, alligator.
Posts: 20365 | From: Alleghany Mountains of Virginia | Registered: May 2001
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bib
Shipmate
# 13074
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Posted
I really dislike the prayers of the just and will tune out if they occur. I like pauses between prayers so that the congregation can silently pray on that subject raised. Silences can be more effective than all the words in the dictionary.
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"My Lord, my Life, my Way, my End, accept the praise I bring"
Posts: 1307 | From: Australia | Registered: Oct 2007
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Baptist Trainfan
Shipmate
# 15128
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Posted
It's not just "just".
It's repeated "Lords" and "reallys" and "woulds" and Evangelical prayer jargon:
"Lord, we would really want to ask that you would just really move tonight in this situation, Lord ..."
Or don't people say that kind of thing any more?
[ 29. January 2013, 12:54: Message edited by: Baptist Trainfan ]
Posts: 9750 | From: The other side of the Severn | Registered: Sep 2009
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Snags
Utterly socially unrealistic
# 15351
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Posted
No, people do ![[Frown]](frown.gif)
<aside>
This is mostly a very worthy and serious thread for one that I'd intended as lighthearted and fluffy. My frivolity is chastened by your collective seriousness. I feel there must be a life-lesson in here for me somewhere
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Vain witterings :-: Vain pretentions :-: The Dog's Blog(locks)
Posts: 1399 | From: just north of That London | Registered: Dec 2009
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Baptist Trainfan
Shipmate
# 15128
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Posted
In that case, three real-life things I have heard.
1. Lady in Baptist church prayer meeting:
"Lord, we pray for those who are sick ... of this fellowship".
2. Student in Bible College, momentarily struck by indecsion as to whether she should say "undertake" or "overrule":
"Lord, we pray that you will overtake in this situation ...".
3. Deacon leading prayers in Pentecostal church, accompanied by interjections from the floor:
"Oh Lord" Hallelujah "We worship you tonight" Praise God ... "We think of all those folk who can't be with us this evening" Thank you, Lord!
At this point everyone had the grace to collapse in giggles.
And one I heard about:
"Lord, if there be any spark of revival, any little flame: please water it".
[ 29. January 2013, 13:24: Message edited by: Baptist Trainfan ]
Posts: 9750 | From: The other side of the Severn | Registered: Sep 2009
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Thyme
Shipmate
# 12360
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Posted
birdie "The body of Christ, broken for you. It's still warm!"
Moo These prayers are known as the prayers of the just.
![[Killing me]](graemlins/killingme.gif)
Baptist Train Fan : It's repeated "Lords" and "reallys" and "woulds" and Evangelical prayer jargon:
<snip>
Or don't people say that kind of thing any more?
******
Sadly it is still very common ime. No sign of it dying out. It tickles me pink because in some places some people cannot complete any sentence without the F word or similar every few words, and this style of prayer reminds me of that. It is a sort of verbal tick and I struggle not to replace all the justs and reallys, woulds and overules with F*** .
Snags: You have clearly tapped into a deep seated seam of angst that needed releasing. ![[Angel]](graemlins/angel.gif)
On a more light hearted note I often hear people say in their best holy voices that we are going to medicate or have a medication, instead of meditate or meditation. Sometimes they don't realise they have done this. ![[Snigger]](graemlins/snigger.gif)
[ 29. January 2013, 14:44: Message edited by: Thyme ]
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The Church in its own bubble has become, at best the guardian of the value system of the nation’s grandparents, and at worst a den of religious anoraks defined by defensiveness, esoteric logic and discrimination. Bishop of Buckingham's blog
Posts: 600 | From: Cloud Cuckoo Land | Registered: Feb 2007
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Adeodatus
Shipmate
# 4992
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Laurelin:
And do not use intercessions to push a particular agenda of your own (owwwww). Do not preach a blinkin' mini-sermon.
Also, God read the Sunday Times even before you did this morning. So it's unnecessary to pray, as I once heard - "Heavenly Father, as you may know there was an earthquake yesterday ..."
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"What is broken, repair with gold."
Posts: 9779 | From: Manchester | Registered: Sep 2003
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ken
Ship's Roundhead
# 2460
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Kitten:
quote:
Originally posted by Jenny Ann:
- Ensure you turn the radio mic on when it is time to speak
- Ensure you turn the mic off again when you are done/it is time to sing/when you go to the loo.
I control it from the sound desk in my Church, I hand it to the preacher already switched on and forbid them to touch the switch
Clone yourtself and send a copy to every church in South-East London!
But until you do, I will continue to fumbl;e around for the off switch whenever my bit is done.
quote:
Originally posted by Adeodatus:
quote:
Originally posted by Laurelin:
And do not use intercessions to push a particular agenda of your own (owwwww). Do not preach a blinkin' mini-sermon.
Also, God read the Sunday Times even before you did this morning. So it's unnecessary to pray, as I once heard - "Heavenly Father, as you may know there was an earthquake yesterday ..."
Which is why the announcements have to come before the intercessions. Even though God knows that Mrs Miggins was taken to hospital last night, some of her neighbours might not.
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Ken
L’amor che move il sole e l’altre stelle.
Posts: 39579 | From: London | Registered: Mar 2002
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Sioni Sais
Shipmate
# 5713
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Posted
If you're not sure what to say, say nothing.
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"He isn't Doctor Who, he's The Doctor"
(Paul Sinha, BBC)
Posts: 24276 | From: Newport, Wales | Registered: Apr 2004
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Baptist Trainfan
Shipmate
# 15128
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Adeodatus:
God read the Sunday Times even before you did this morning. So it's unnecessary to pray, as I once heard - "Heavenly Father, as you may know there was an earthquake yesterday ..."
I read of a prayer meeting held in a Methodist Chapel in 1916, just before the Battle of Jutland. The pray-er gave God a comprehensive verbal plan of the opposing navies (cribbed from the newspaper), then asked Him to "Tip up their ships".
Re. microphones: do not wear a lapel microphone scritch-scritch underneath a cassock and stole muffle-muffle as it's VERY ANNOYING.
Posts: 9750 | From: The other side of the Severn | Registered: Sep 2009
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Pigwidgeon
Ship's Owl
# 10192
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Adeodatus:
Also, God read the Sunday Times even before you did this morning. So it's unnecessary to pray, as I once heard - "Heavenly Father, as you may know there was an earthquake yesterday ..."
And He is aware of the weather. I suffered through a "weather report" prayer once: "Lord, it's a beautiful day. The sky is blue, the sun is shining, etc. etc." The minister telling God about the weather could easily have prayed "Thank you, Lord, for this beautiful day, the bright sunshine, etc. etc."
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"...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe."
~Tortuf
Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005
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Alex Cockell
Ship’s penguin
# 7487
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Baptist Trainfan:
quote:
Originally posted by cattyish:
It occurs to me that music playing underneath speech is difficult enough to hear through in my kitchen on the TV with the sound turned right up. It must be terrible to try to pick out speech from music in an echoey sanctuary. Maybe speech on its own, then music on its own is better for clarity.
This is a real problem on videos that are produced by denominations or missionary societies with a view to them being shown in church. I have often complained about it (to be fair, our denomination now includes optional subtitles).
Apropos to this - we're in a thread re what not to do? - what NOT to do in this situation is give the playout package to the AV team without giving them time to test and then cue it.
Posts: 2146 | From: Reading, Berkshire UK | Registered: Jun 2004
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Spike
Mostly Harmless
# 36
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Posted
If I understood what you were talking about, I'm sure I'd be careful! ![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
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"May you get to heaven before the devil knows you're dead" - Irish blessing
Posts: 12860 | From: The Valley of Crocuses | Registered: May 2001
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Alex Cockell
Ship’s penguin
# 7487
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Spike:
If I understood what you were talking about, I'm sure I'd be careful!
Was referring to video packages.
Scratched DVDs one one occasion was a real bugbear... BOTH copies were scratched to shit...
Posts: 2146 | From: Reading, Berkshire UK | Registered: Jun 2004
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Truman White
Shipmate
# 17290
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Posted
Don't take up the offering/collection whilst singing "I Hear the Sound of Rustling...."
Posts: 476 | Registered: Aug 2012
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Starbug
Shipmate
# 15917
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Lord Jestocost:
1. Bridges (as in the musical devices) that have no discernible relationship to the tune that people have just been singing are intended for performances of songs. When the congregation is trying to sing along, they kill the song dead.
2. Just because this song slayed the crowd at Let God Spring into Royal Acts of Harvest Growth, backed by a professional band and sound team, does not mean it will sound good in our local church.
3. Just because the songbook says verse 2 goes "Siyahamba ekukhanyen kwenkhos" does not mean you should actually try to sing it, or indeed that it is singable.
I'm spotting a theme. I'll shut up now.
Following on from these (all of which I've experienced)...
Just because a song sounds great backed by guitars on the latest Now That's What I Call Worship CD, doesn't mean that it will sound good sung by an elderly congregation and played on an organ.
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“Oh the pointing again. They're screwdrivers! What are you going to do? Assemble a cabinet at them?” ― The Day of the Doctor
Posts: 1189 | From: West of the New Forest | Registered: Sep 2010
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Adeodatus
Shipmate
# 4992
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by ken:
quote:
Originally posted by Adeodatus:
quote:
Originally posted by Laurelin:
And do not use intercessions to push a particular agenda of your own (owwwww). Do not preach a blinkin' mini-sermon.
Also, God read the Sunday Times even before you did this morning. So it's unnecessary to pray, as I once heard - "Heavenly Father, as you may know there was an earthquake yesterday ..."
Which is why the announcements have to come before the intercessions. Even though God knows that Mrs Miggins was taken to hospital last night, some of her neighbours might not.
And (serious one, this) if Mrs Miggins is going to have her name read out in church, has she given her consent to have her name read out in church? Because if she hasn't, it's nobody's business but her own that she's in hospital.
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"What is broken, repair with gold."
Posts: 9779 | From: Manchester | Registered: Sep 2003
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Moo
Ship's tough old bird
# 107
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Posted
I heard a story about a prayer for healing, 'Lord, we lift Sister Brown's stomach up to you.'
Moo
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Kerygmania host
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See you later, alligator.
Posts: 20365 | From: Alleghany Mountains of Virginia | Registered: May 2001
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Oscar the Grouch
Adopted Cascadian
# 1916
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Posted
My main advice to anyone leading worship (in ANY tradition) is this:
NEVER apologise for something going wrong (unless it's really REALLY obvious)
I have, at one time or another, done all of the following:
- Forgotten to announce the Bible reading and gone straight into the sermon
- Forgotten the Lord's Prayer
- Inadvertently skipped a major chunk of the Eucharistic Prayer
- Plus many other mistakes....
If you come to a juddering halt and then apologise profusely, it just causes the whole service to collapse. If you say nothing and go on as normal, most people won't notice or will praise you for the innovative way you have done things.
(In the case of the missing Bible reading, I realised (alas, too late) what I had done and so announced the Bible reading towards the end of the service, with an explanation that it fitted as a response to the sermon, rather than as an introduction to it. Most people seemed to buy that, although they did wonder why my wife was visibly struggling to prevent herself bursting into laughter.)
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Faradiu, dundeibáwa weyu lárigi weyu
Posts: 3871 | From: Gamma Quadrant, just to the left of Galifrey | Registered: Dec 2001
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Laurelin
Shipmate
# 17211
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Posted
This thread is hilarious!
Yep. The Golden Rule for anyone leading worship/prayers/etc is: Get out of the way. Just GET OUT OF THE WAY. Don't draw attention to yourself. And that includes your mistakes. The good folk in the pews, or the comfy chairs, don't give a you-know-what about your mistake. Just move on. People really do want to pray, to experience God's presence. Draw all the attention to Him, and don't tell Him what He already knows.
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"I fear that to me Siamese cats belong to the fauna of Mordor." J.R.R. Tolkien
Posts: 545 | From: The Shire | Registered: Jul 2012
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The Intrepid Mrs S
Shipmate
# 17002
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Posted
Mr. S does a lot of stints as laptop operator in church, and suffered many many people coming to him immediately before the service, with 47 pictures on a memory stick, asking him to put them into the PowerPoint (or later Songpro) presentation. To the extent that one Saturday morning he woke up from a nightmare that Archbishop John Sentamu had done that exact same thing to him, and he said to me 'If anyone - even an Archbishop - comes to me tomorrow night and asks me to do that, I'm going to say NO.'
Well, guess what - the Archbishop of our link diocese in Uganda came in, 2 minutes before Evening Praise, with his memory stick and a whole selection of pictures!
I was on the dais with the band, in imminent danger of an accident from laughing so much...
Mrs. S, bewareful of unguarded threats!
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Don't get your knickers in a twist over your advancing age. It achieves nothing and makes you walk funny.
Prayer should be our first recourse, not our last resort
'Lord, please give us patience. NOW!'
Posts: 1464 | From: Neither here nor there | Registered: Mar 2012
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latecomer
Apprentice
# 8966
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Posted
If you are operating the hymn karaoke machine, and realise the congregation is singing more verses than you have programmed in ........... don't start an extra verse when the congregation is halfway through singing the verse unaccompanied.
(Not me, thank the Lord, but I was there)
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Keep it simple - I can do simple
Posts: 27 | From: Somerset | Registered: Jan 2005
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