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» Ship of Fools   »   » Oblivion   » One-liners from your favourite books. (Page 1)

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Source: (consider it) Thread: One-liners from your favourite books.
Huia
Shipmate
# 3473

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I have been enjoying the T shirt slogans thread and it occurred to me that some of my favourite books have lines that stay in my memory long after I have read the book. They may be funny or thought-provoking or leave me with a sense of completion.

Jane Austen's - It is a truth universally acknowledged that a single man of good fortune must be in want of a wife. is one of the best known opening sentences in a novel. So what are your favourites?

Mine - from Hitchhikers' Guide to the Galaxy "Time is an illusion, lunchtime doubly so"

And from Madeline the first book I loved as a child. '"Thank the Lord that you are well and go to sleep,'" said Miss Clavell. And she turned out the light and closed the door. That's all there is, there isn't anymore".

Huia

--------------------
Charity gives food from the table, Justice gives a place at the table.

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Pine Marten
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# 11068

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From my favourite childhood book Through the Looking Glass, the whole of chapter 11: '...and it really was a kitten, after all.'

Yes, I am owned by several cats [Smile] .

And the line that always gives me shivers of delight (no doubting from where): 'Mr Holmes, they were the footprints of a gigantic hound!'

Maybe I just have a thing about animals... [Paranoid]

And of course from the wonderful Miss du Maurier: 'Last night I dreamt I went to Manderley again.'

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Keep love in your heart. A life without it is like a sunless garden when the flowers are dead. - Oscar Wilde

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ExclamationMark
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# 14715

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"May I?" he said. And he did

Uncle Pumblechook, Great Expectations (Dickens)

And another

"What wind blows you here Pip?" (Miss Havisham)

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leo
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# 1458

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Earthly Powers - Anthony Burgess, begins with a pope saying "It was the afternoon of my eighty-first birthday, and I was in bed with my catamite when Ali announced that the archbishop had come to see me."

--------------------
My Jewish-positive lectionary blog is at http://recognisingjewishrootsinthelectionary.wordpress.com/
My reviews at http://layreadersbookreviews.wordpress.com

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Welease Woderwick

Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424

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I collect these for my miscellaneous quotes file and a favourite for the moment comes from Mark Haddon's A Spot of Bother

quote:
But god, the woman could make you feel greedy and self-centred just by the way she wore a shapeless fawn cardigan.


--------------------
I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
Fancy a break in South India?
Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details

What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?

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ElaineC
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# 12244

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"It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen." from 1984 by George Orwell

"Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way." from Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy

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Music is the only language in which you cannot say a mean or sarcastic thing. John Erskine

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Firenze

Ordinary decent pagan
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'It is not the object of this work to give a description of Derbyshire'. (J Austen)

Good quote for writers - ie, stuff the lyrical evocation of landscape and Get On With It.

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JonahMan
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# 12126

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"And ever Sir Lancelot wept, as he had been a child that were beaten." Le Morte D'Arthur

--------------------
Thank God for the aged
And old age itself, and illness and the grave
For when you're old, or ill and particularly in the coffin
It's no trouble to behave

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Caissa
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"The history of all hitherto existing society is the history of class struggles" Karl Marx, The Communist Manifesto
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Hedgehog

Ship's Shortstop
# 14125

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“Marley was dead: to begin with.” -- Charles Dickens, A Christmas Carol

What a great way to start a story! Actually, the first 2 paragraphs are delightful, but I realize we are to limit ourselves to one-liners.

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"We must regain the conviction that we need one another, that we have a shared responsibility for others and the world, and that being good and decent are worth it."--Pope Francis, Laudato Si'

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S. Bacchus
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# 17778

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Two appropriately churchy first lines:

'Had the Dean's daughter worn a bra that afternoon, Norman Shotover might never have found out about the Church of England; still less about how to fly' — A.N. Wilson, 'Unguarded Hours'.

'"Take my camel, dear", said my aunt Dot, as she climbed down from this animal on her return from High Mass.' — Rose Macauly, The Towers of Trebizond.

(The latter book also has what is perhaps the most poignant final sentence, which is written as a paragraph unto itself: 'That seems, indeed, the eternal dilemma'. Now, granted that's not terribly poignant out of context, but in the context of the astonishing final chapter, it's a real tear-jerker).

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'It's not that simple. I won't have it to be that simple'.

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Welease Woderwick

Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424

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Armistead Maupin in Maybe the Moon:

quote:
Like I’ve always said, love wouldn’t be blind if the Braille weren’t so damned much fun.


--------------------
I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
Fancy a break in South India?
Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details

What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?

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venbede
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# 16669

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Here's Barbara Pym at the very opening of her first published novel, "Some Tame Gazelle", managing both to sum up her themes (female interest in unobtainable but unsatisfactory males)and anticipate her parodists:

The new curate seemed quite a nice young man, but what a pity it was that his combinations showed, tucked carelessly into his socks when he sat down.

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Man was made for joy and woe;
And when this we rightly know,
Thro' the world we safely go.

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venbede
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# 16669

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And from Angela Carter's Wise Children

She was going on about it as if it were a matter of life and death. We knew that nothing is a matter of life and death except life and death.

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Man was made for joy and woe;
And when this we rightly know,
Thro' the world we safely go.

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Welease Woderwick

Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424

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From the excellent Last Train to Innocence by Jayabrato Chatterjee:

quote:
Badibua was never pleased with anything or anybody and she had mastered the knack of making other people’s lives miserable.


--------------------
I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
Fancy a break in South India?
Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details

What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?

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venbede
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# 16669

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And Jane Austen Emma

It was rather too late in the day to set about being simple-minded and ignorant.

And the entire text of The Importance of Being Earnest.

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Man was made for joy and woe;
And when this we rightly know,
Thro' the world we safely go.

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Gwai
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# 11076

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One of my favorite ways to begin a book: “There was a desert wind blowing that night. It was one of those hot dry Santa Anas that come down through the mountain passes and curl your hair and make your nerves jump and your skin itch. On nights like that every booze party ends in a fight. Meek little wives feel the edge of the carving knife and study their husbands' necks. Anything can happen. You can even get a full glass of beer at a cocktail lounge.” from Red Wind by Raymond Chandler

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A master of men was the Goodly Fere,
A mate of the wind and sea.
If they think they ha’ slain our Goodly Fere
They are fools eternally.


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venbede
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# 16669

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That's wonderfully Chandlereque. I was going to post the opening of The Big Sleep but thought we were only allowed to post one liners.

--------------------
Man was made for joy and woe;
And when this we rightly know,
Thro' the world we safely go.

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Firenze

Ordinary decent pagan
# 619

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He was good, wasn't he? I like -

'IT WAS ABOUT ELEVEN O’CLOCK in the morning, mid October, with the sun not shining and a look of hard wet rain in the clearness of the foothills. I was wearing my powder-blue suit, with dark blue shirt, tie and display handkerchief, black brogues, black wool socks with dark blue clocks on them. I was neat, clean, shaved and sober, and I didn’t care who knew it. I was everything the well-dressed private detective ought to be. I was calling on four million dollars.'

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Welease Woderwick

Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424

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A fabulous bit of Graham Greene from Travels with my Aunt:

quote:
I sometimes believe in a Higher Power, even though I am a Catholic.


--------------------
I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
Fancy a break in South India?
Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details

What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?

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venbede
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# 16669

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That is just what I was going to post, Firenze.

--------------------
Man was made for joy and woe;
And when this we rightly know,
Thro' the world we safely go.

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Og, King of Bashan

Ship's giant Amorite
# 9562

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My favorite Graham Greene one liners come from the last two pages of The Heart of the Matter. Hard to pick one, but I'll go with
quote:
For goodness' sake, Mrs. Sconce, don't imagine you- or I- know a thing about God's mercy.
And you could do a whole discussion on the best Wodehouse one liners, but I'll go with the classic, which I think stands up well on its own, but is even funnier in the original context:
quote:
She was definitely the sort of girl who puts her hands over a husband’s eyes, as he is crawling into breakfast with a morning head, and says. ‘Guess who!’


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"I like to eat crawfish and drink beer. That's despair?" ― Walker Percy

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venbede
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# 16669

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Madelaine Basset! It is profound that she ends up marrying the fascist Roderick Spode. Sentimentality is indeed the partner of fascism.

My favourite Wodehouse is from the village hall chapter of The Mating Season. The whole lot is glorious but I'll go and check out the description of the vicar introducing it.

--------------------
Man was made for joy and woe;
And when this we rightly know,
Thro' the world we safely go.

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venbede
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# 16669

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The Mating Season P G Wodehouse

"A tall, drooping man, looking as if he had been stuffed in a hurry by an incompetent taxidermist, it became apparent that he was not one of those boisterous vicars who, when opening a village concert, bound on the stage with a whoop and a holler, give the parishoners a huge Hello, slam across a couple of travelling-salesman-and-farmer's- daughter stories and bound off, beaming."

Not just looking stuffed.

Not just looking stuffed in a hurry.

Not just looking stuffed in a hurry by a taxidermist.

But stuffed in a hurry by an incompetent taxidermist,

--------------------
Man was made for joy and woe;
And when this we rightly know,
Thro' the world we safely go.

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Welease Woderwick

Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424

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Ngaio March uttering a truism in Death of a Peer:

quote:
There’s something inherently vulgar in fashion.


--------------------
I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
Fancy a break in South India?
Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details

What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?

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Firenze

Ordinary decent pagan
# 619

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There are some lines from Shaw's days as a music critic stay with me: not just the famous quip about Brahm's Requiem ('to be endured with equanimity only by the corpse') but the likes of: 'the other day, being in want of a headache, I went to the music hall... '. Or on the performance of some soprano - 'the memory of which is, as I write, reconciling me to the grave'.
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Welease Woderwick

Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424

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Some words of wisdon from Niccolao Manucci, the author of a book now known as A Pepys of Mughal India - he travelled here in the second half of the 17th century:

quote:
Travelling is a teacher of many things, and he who wanders without learning anything can only be said to have the head of an ass.


--------------------
I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
Fancy a break in South India?
Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details

What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?

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Lyda*Rose

Ship's broken porthole
# 4544

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quote:
The King was pregnant.
~from The Left Hand of Darkness by Ursula K. LeGuin

This was evidently LeGuin's seed sentence for the entire book, a story set on a planet where all adults morphed either male or female for a few days of sexual activity every few weeks. And, of course, if one got pregnant, she would remain female until the birth and weaning.

--------------------
"Dear God, whose name I do not know - thank you for my life. I forgot how BIG... thank you. Thank you for my life." ~from Joe Vs the Volcano

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Lord Jestocost
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# 12909

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"Course he isn't safe. But he's good. He’s the King, I tell you."

No prizes...

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Welease Woderwick

Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424

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A wonderful line from Scaramouche by Rafael Sabatini:

quote:
He was born with a gift of laughter and a sense that the world was mad.


--------------------
I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
Fancy a break in South India?
Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details

What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?

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mousethief

Ship's Thieving Rodent
# 953

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"The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don't."

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

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This is the last sig I'll ever write for you...

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Kelly Alves

Bunny with an axe
# 2522

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"Her tone had an upholstered confidence that was both regal and vulgar at once. It demanded a few moments of silence in its wake, like the ringing of a church bell or the playing of taps" (8.)-Brownies, Z.Z Packer, describing the queen bee bully of a Brownie troop.

Well, two liner, but they really needed to hang together.

--------------------
I cannot expect people to believe “
Jesus loves me, this I know” of they don’t believe “Kelly loves me, this I know.”
Kelly Alves, somewhere around 2003.

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quetzalcoatl
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# 16740

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Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try Again. Fail again. Fail better.

Beckett. Worstward Ho.

--------------------
I can't talk to you today; I talked to two people yesterday.

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quetzalcoatl
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# 16740

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Perfume of embraces all him assailed. With hungered flesh obscurely, he mutely craved to adore.

Joyce. Ulysses.

It's just the Irish in me coming out. (That's not my favourite line).

--------------------
I can't talk to you today; I talked to two people yesterday.

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quetzalcoatl
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# 16740

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duplicate post.

[ 13. September 2013, 16:53: Message edited by: quetzalcoatl ]

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I can't talk to you today; I talked to two people yesterday.

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Paul.
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# 37

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I quite like this:

quote:
The key to living anywhere is to know how to live there – just ask any snail
M.M. Smith, The Servants.

Oh and did someone mention Chandler?

quote:
…there was a broad stained-glass panel showing a knight in dark armour rescuing a lady who was tied to a tree and didn’t have any clothes on but some very long and convenient hair. The knight had pushed the vizor of his helmet back to be sociable, and he was fiddling with the knots of the ropes that tied the lady to the tree and not getting anywhere. I stood there and thought that if I lived in the house, I would sooner or later have to climb up there and help him. He didn’t seem to be really trying.
from The Big Sleep.
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Firenze

Ordinary decent pagan
# 619

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All of the Myles naGopaleen Buchhandlung columns, including -

'Not less than six volumes to be inscribed with forged messages of affection and gratitude from the author of each work, e.g.... 'From your devoted friend and follower, K. Marx.'... 'Short of the great pleasure of seeing you personally, I can only send you, dear A.B., this copy of "Nostromo". I miss your company more than I can say... (signature undecipherable).'
Under the last inscription, the moron who owns the book will be asked to write (and shown how if necessary) the phrase 'Poor old Conrad was not the worst.'

[ 13. September 2013, 17:36: Message edited by: Firenze ]

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L'organist
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# 17338

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From Why Catholics Can't Sing by Thomas Day
quote:
Hail Mary:Gentle Woman by Carey Landry requires special attention here because it provides a superior example not only of musical whimsy but of whimsy gone berserk.
Try YouTubing it - see if you agree!

And from the same volume
quote:
Even at that tender age I knew that in our relatively prosperous parish, which claimed to have "one of the finest adult choirs in the archdiocese", only the deaf willingly attended High Mass.
[Killing me]

--------------------
Rara temporum felicitate ubi sentire quae velis et quae sentias dicere licet

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hanginginthere
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# 17541

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'Frederick had been the kind of husband whose wife betakes herself early to the feet of God.'

From Elizabeth von Arnim's The Enchanted April

--------------------
'Safe?' said Mr Beaver. 'Who said anything about safe? But he's good. He's the King, I tell you.'

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Sparrow
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# 2458

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Another Austen, again probably no prizes necessary:

"It darted through her, with the speed of an arrow, that Mr. Knightley must marry no one but herself!"

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For I am persuaded that neither death, nor life,nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present nor things to come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

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Hedgehog

Ship's Shortstop
# 14125

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Perhaps this is technically a two-liner, but it is short enough to be granted an exemption:

"I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didn't know." Mark Twain, Life on the Mississippi

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"We must regain the conviction that we need one another, that we have a shared responsibility for others and the world, and that being good and decent are worth it."--Pope Francis, Laudato Si'

Posts: 2740 | From: Delaware, USA | Registered: Sep 2008  |  IP: Logged
Enoch
Shipmate
# 14322

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Wendy Cope always cheers me up. Here she is on Kindness to Animals:-
quote:
"But the lamb is not endangered
And at least I can truthfully say
I have never, ever, eaten a barn owl
So perhaps I am OK."

It's not really a favourite book, but this is a gem from Svetlana Alllelyova, Stalin's daughter. It says so much about the old Russia as it inhabits our imaginations.
quote:
"People were a lot more honest and emotional back in those days. If they didn't like the way it was, they shot themselves. Who does that kind of thing now?"


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Brexit wrexit - Sir Graham Watson

Posts: 7610 | From: Bristol UK(was European Green Capital 2015, now Ljubljana) | Registered: Nov 2008  |  IP: Logged
Garasu
Shipmate
# 17152

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I'm quite fond of:
quote:
"Reader, I martyred him."
Brenchley, Chaz. - Dead of light

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"Could I believe in the doctrine without believing in the deity?". - Modesitt, L. E., Jr., 1943- Imager.

Posts: 889 | From: Surrey Heath (England) | Registered: Jun 2012  |  IP: Logged
Heavenly Anarchist
Shipmate
# 13313

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Another Hitchhiker's, this is Arthur after Ford asks him how he feels.

"Like a military academy," said Arthur, "bits of me keep on passing out".

Zaphod at the restaurant:

"You guys are so unhip it's a wonder your bums don't fall off."

And from 1066 (but a 3 liner!):

Charles I was a Cavalier King and therefore had a small pointed beard, long flowing curls, a large, flat, flowing hat, and gay attire. The Roundheads, on the other hand, were clean-shaven and wore tall, conical hats, white ties, and sombre garments. Under these circumstances a Civil War was inevitable.
[Smile]



[Smile]

[ 13. September 2013, 19:12: Message edited by: Heavenly Anarchist ]

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'I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.' Douglas Adams
Dog Activity Monitor
My shop

Posts: 2831 | From: Trumpington | Registered: Jan 2008  |  IP: Logged
Kelly Alves

Bunny with an axe
# 2522

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“Some people need a red carpet rolled out in front of them in order to walk forward into friendship. They can't see the tiny outstretched hands all around them, everywhere, like leaves on trees.”
― Miranda July, No One Belongs Here More Than You

Posts: 35076 | From: Pura Californiana | Registered: Mar 2002  |  IP: Logged
Huia
Shipmate
# 3473

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I'm sorry that my specifying 'one liners' has limited some people - it may have been better if I had said, "short quotes" still it's good to see shippies going ahead regardless of the ineptitude of the original post.

Venbede - I love your sig, which was part of my inspiration in launching this thread.

From The Red Tree a picture book by Shaun Tan and one of the best books at describing the experience of depression.

"sometimes the day begins with nothing to look forward to and things go from bad to worse darkness overcomes you nobody understands the world is a deaf machine..."

In writing that I've just realised that he doesn't use conventual punctuation, but allows the turning of the page to act as punctuation. It's brilliant because it captures the relentlessness of feeling depressed.

Huia

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Charity gives food from the table, Justice gives a place at the table.

Posts: 10382 | From: Te Wai Pounamu | Registered: Oct 2002  |  IP: Logged
Kaplan Corday
Shipmate
# 16119

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"Oh," said the Bright Young People. "Oh,oh oh".

From Evelyn Waugh's description of a rough crossing of the Channel in Vile Bodies.

[ 13. September 2013, 19:56: Message edited by: Kaplan Corday ]

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Firenze

Ordinary decent pagan
# 619

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quote:
Originally posted by Heavenly Anarchist:

And from 1066 (but a 3 liner!):

Charles I was a Cavalier King and therefore had a small pointed beard, long flowing curls, a large, flat, flowing hat, and gay attire. The Roundheads, on the other hand, were clean-shaven and wore tall, conical hats, white ties, and sombre garments. Under these circumstances a Civil War was inevitable.

I've found the categorisation Wrong but Wromantic vs Right but Repulsive has stood me in good stead over the years.

Favourite HGTTG is probably -

'It's unpleasantly like being drunk'

'What's unpleasant about being drunk?'

'Ask a glass of water'.

Posts: 17302 | From: Edinburgh | Registered: Jun 2001  |  IP: Logged
no prophet's flag is set so...

Proceed to see sea
# 15560

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My current sig is Stephen Maturin to Jack Aubrey in Master and Commander by Patrick O'Brian, published circa 1972.

"Wit is the unexpected copulation of ideas."

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Out of this nettle, danger, we pluck this flower, safety.
\_(ツ)_/

Posts: 11498 | From: Treaty 6 territory in the nonexistant Province of Buffalo, Canada ↄ⃝' | Registered: Mar 2010  |  IP: Logged
Moo

Ship's tough old bird
# 107

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About the King and the Duke in Huckleberry Finn
quote:
They gave several temperance lectures, but they didn't raise enough money to get drunk.
Moo

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Kerygmania host
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See you later, alligator.

Posts: 20365 | From: Alleghany Mountains of Virginia | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged



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