Ship of Fools: Things to do while invisible

Thread: Things to do while invisible Board: Oblivion / Ship of Fools.

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Posted by Ariel (# 58) on :

Idle question: what would you do if you were invisible for a while (and could control it)?

Be a fly on the wall somewhere?
Play practical jokes?
Perform mysterious acts of charity?
Visit the nearest all-you-can-eat and leave without paying?
Go for a drive (and freak out the people you pass)?

Something else?

Posted by The Rogue (# 2275) on :

Practical jokes for me but I suspect that I would soon get bored with it.

Is this question Dr Who inspired?

Posted by Sandemaniac (# 12829) on :

I can think of a few people to whom I would hand out the hardest kicks up the arse I could physically manage - whilst wearing my cricket spikes. But them I'm currently channelling some vindictive little bastard.

AG

Posted by Lamb Chopped (# 5528) on :

I'd no doubt turn into LC the spy (with regards to Certain People I'm still having a helluva time forgiving) and that would be very bad for me. Meh.

On the other hand, I'd have a great time walking around in the altogether because nobody could catch me at it.

Posted by Viola (# 20) on :

Lots of fly-on-the-wall stuff, and then, if I could get a couple of my friends to be invisible as well, we would go and deliver some chaotic karma to someone who is currently playing Ms Lovely in public whilst playing quite a different tune to a bunch of people who can't do anything about it without it looking like sour grapes.

Might have a bit of fun on the London train en route to the chaotic karma too...

Posted by JonahMan (# 12126) on :

Would it be wrong to assassinate a few deserving folk? I'd be sorely tempted.

Posted by no prophet (# 15560) on :

Plant a bug, or baby monitor in the parliamentary barbershop and beauty salon. I would also rearrange the furniture at night in the homes of everyone who ever pissed me off. And change sugar for salt on their tables. I'm not mature enough to think beyond my 10 year old self.

Posted by Lamb Chopped (# 5528) on :

[Killing me]

Posted by Kaplan Corday (# 16119) on :

Produce inexplicable miraculous happenings in uptight, doctinaire cessationist churches.

Posted by Stercus Tauri (# 16668) on :

I'd go for a bike ride through the town.

Posted by Lamb Chopped (# 5528) on :

From the behavior of a lot of drivers, I'd say you're wasting your gift. You're already invisible to them if you're on a bike.

Posted by Golden Key (# 1468) on :

Play poltergeist, as and where needed.

No Prophet, we have similar ideas. [Smile]

Posted by Schroedinger's cat (# 64) on :

A very few people would be dead.

A few others would be slowly - but not too slowly - driven to madness because they could no longer trust what they knew.

A number of others would receive unexpected gifts from people who didn't even know they had given them.

And, of course, the girls changing rooms would be haunted.....

Posted by cattyish (# 7829) on :

I just can't think of anything I'd want to be invisible for. Is this the definition of an extrovert?

Cattyish, off to walk the dog in skanky clothing without any shame whatsoever.

Posted by Hart (# 4991) on :

In one of Plato's dialogues, an unscrupulous hypothetical character makes himself invisible in order to seduce a woman. I've still never quite worked that one out.

I'm a naturally curious person (probably in both the objective and subjective senses of the word), so the temptation for me would be to use invisibility for inquiry and observation (not snooping or spying, no: inquiry and observation...)

Posted by TheAlethiophile (# 16870) on :

I would definitely go in for a haunting. Think of the scene from Ghost when Sam is tormenting his former colleague by pushing furniture around and typing on his computer.

Though if I could sabotage anything right now, it would be the auto-prompts at the Tory party conference. [Snigger]

Posted by Lord Jestocost (# 12909) on :

The difficulty would be gaining access to the interesting places you want to be invisible in ...

Posted by Sir Kevin (# 3492) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Schroedinger's cat:

And, of course, the girls changing rooms would be haunted.....

I'd drive down to one of our local motor racing venues in a borrowed Ferrari in the middle of the night and do some laps!

Posted by Karl: Liberal Backslider (# 76) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Lamb Chopped:
From the behavior of a lot of drivers, I'd say you're wasting your gift. You're already invisible to them if you're on a bike.

I was going to say. Getting on a bike's a brilliant way of becoming invisible.

Posted by lilBuddha (# 14333) on :

I would huddle under my bed, in the dark, wearing as many bits of clothing that would fit and covered in blankets, the duvet and a tarpoline. And on the mobile to a psychologist.

Naughty Ariel, you are not getting me to walk around starkers in public.

Posted by Lyda*Rose (# 4544) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Lord Jestocost:
The difficulty would be gaining access to the interesting places you want to be invisible in ...

Examples? I'd think that sneaking in on the heels of security would work in a lot of cases.

Posted by Jengie Jon (# 273) on :

Karl

I am pretty sure that if you decided to cycle naked then the bike would very quickly loose its invisibility capabilities.

Sorry my mind is mixing yours and LilBuddha's posts.

Jengie

Posted by Kitten (# 1179) on :

What I would do at the would be distinctly u heavenly.

But it would leave one hell of a locked room mystery

Posted by lilBuddha (# 14333) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Jengie Jon:
Karl

I am pretty sure that if you decided to cycle naked then the bike would very quickly loose its invisibility capabilities.

Sorry my mind is mixing yours and LilBuddha's posts.

Jengie

Such is Ariel's intent, at least, methinks. One act in a play of mischief?

Posted by Ariel (# 58) on :

quote:
Originally posted by cattyish:
I just can't think of anything I'd want to be invisible for.

I want to go to expensive exhibitions without having to pay or queue for them. It would be ideal for that. Could be good for theatre and cinema too.

On the same grounds, free travel on public transport for the duration. No worries about expensive fares or time restrictions, I would simply vault over the ticket barriers and limp onto the train, what the hell, Orient Express, or maybe even plane of my choice.

Posted by The Rogue (# 2275) on :

You couldn't take a seat at any of those - someone else might want it.

Posted by Ariel (# 58) on :

True, but once a few people had found themselves mysteriously sat upon by an invisible force, and deduced the seat was haunted, it would be all mine.

(Btw - yes. It was Doctor Who inspired. I don't think Danny made any good use of that watch.)

[ 29. September 2014, 20:50: Message edited by: Ariel ]

Posted by Spike (# 36) on :

quote:
Originally posted by The Rogue:
You couldn't take a seat at any of those - someone else might want it.

But being invisible, giving them a shock when they sit down would be hilarious!

Posted by Firenze (# 619) on :

In these days of thermal imaging, you really need to be immaterial to get the fun you used to have just by being invisible.

BTW, what happened to the idea that to be invisible what you need is a perfectly black cloak?

Posted by Lord Jestocost (# 12909) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Lyda*Rose:

quote:
Originally posted by Lord Jestocost:
The difficulty would be gaining access to the interesting places you want to be invisible in ...
Examples? I'd think that sneaking in on the heels of security would work in a lot of cases.

I was thinking more private residences.

Posted by Karl: Liberal Backslider (# 76) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Jengie Jon:
Karl

I am pretty sure that if you decided to cycle naked then the bike would very quickly loose its invisibility capabilities.

Sorry my mind is mixing yours and LilBuddha's posts.

Jengie

If I cycled naked along Bochum Parkway in February something would soon be invisible...

Posted by Eutychus (# 3081) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Kaplan Corday:
Produce inexplicable miraculous happenings in uptight, doctinaire cessationist churches.

I approve of this plan.

Posted by Lucia (# 15201) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Karl: Liberal Backslider:

quote:
Originally posted by Lamb Chopped:
From the behavior of a lot of drivers, I'd say you're wasting your gift. You're already invisible to them if you're on a bike.
I was going to say. Getting on a bike's a brilliant way of becoming invisible.

At the risk of being serious on a heavenly thread there are actually genuine reasons why you become 'invisible' on a bike! This explains further.

Posted by BessHiggs (# 15176) on :

I'd go through all those inviting doors marked No Admittance just to see what was on the other side of them.

/tangent
My grandmother used to do this, using the unique invisibility of little old ladies. She'd get a twinkle in her eye, say, "I wonder what's behind there," and off she'd go. When she'd get caught, as she always did, she'd pretend to be confused and lost and helpful security guard would bring her back to us. She got to see all kinds of cool stuff that way. [Big Grin]

/tangent

Posted by Hart (# 4991) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Firenze:
BTW, what happened to the idea that to be invisible what you need is a perfectly black cloak?

I think it went away with the opera assumption that if you wear a mask, no-one has any way of telling who you are, and the Shakespeare assumption that if a woman puts her hair up, there is no way to tell she's isn't a guy.

Posted by HCH (# 14313) on :

A reasonable, albeit dishonest, choice might be to sneak into movie theaters without paying. Of course, it might then be difficult to obtain popcorn.

Posted by Pigwidgeon (# 10192) on :

quote:
Originally posted by HCH:
A reasonable, albeit dishonest, choice might be to sneak into movie theaters without paying. Of course, it might then be difficult to obtain popcorn.

You could help yourself to other people's popcorn.
[Big Grin]

Posted by Ariel (# 58) on :

Come to think of it, being invisible would be an ideal attribute for a security guard in a supermarket. You could walk up behind someone who's about to shoplift a packet of biscuits, they turn, unnerved by the sound of footsteps in an apparently empty aisle, but decide to continue, at which point you breathe warmly down their neck and in a sepulchral voice, intone, "This is the voice of your conscience. Put... that... baaaaaackkkk...."

Posted by Palimpsest (# 16772) on :

Being invisible is less useful in todays crowds. Still it would be nice to walk through the woods and watch the birds. This assumes you are sound proof as well.

Posted by comet (# 10353) on :

I think I'd watch people shower and giggle at them. when they get out, I'd leave cryptic messages in the steam on their mirrors.

also: I want to grow up to be Bess's Gran.

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