Thread: The strongest oath she used was " Saint Eloy!" Board: Oblivion / Ship of Fools.


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Posted by Amanda B. Reckondwythe (# 5521) on :
 
With apologies to Chaucer.

This seems like a strange topic for Heaven, but I'm sure a host will move it if appropriate.

I'm inspired by the discussion on the Middle Class Values thread of "swear words" that people use.

I'm reminded of one night on the bus, when I had rung the bell for my stop well in advance, but the driver drove right by without stopping. Why? So he could stop to let a little old lady off directly in front of her house, which was not a marked stop. Admirable, unarguably, but no excuse for not stopping for me.

When I protested, the little old lady spat at me, "Go to hell!" I'm sure it was the strongest oath she had ever uttered -- perhaps the only one she knew.

What oaths have been used on you?
 
Posted by Ariel (# 58) on :
 
I think we've all been told to "**** off" or "go to hell" at some point, so let's not go there, as that would be dull and unoriginal. If this thread could focus on creative expressions that people have been on the receiving end of (preferably printable) that might be quite entertaining.

"Go forth and multiply" is one I've heard someone use. "Go and take a long walk off a very short pier" is another.
 
Posted by Darllenwr (# 14520) on :
 
Does "excrement occurs" fit into this definition?
 
Posted by Leorning Cniht (# 17564) on :
 
We had a kiddies' Christmas pageant at our church the other day. Something surprising happened, at which point the sweet little old lady sitting behind me exclaimed "Oh my God!" rather loudly, then realized what she had said in Church, turned bright red and clapped her hands over her mouth, babbling apologetically.
 
Posted by Trudy Scrumptious (# 5647) on :
 
My fifteen-year-old daughter refuses to swear even now that the kids have reached the age where we've accepted that under extreme circumstances they will sometimes hear us swear and we'll hear them swear. She is the queen of the creative made-up fake swear words. She also hates getting needles, and I thought the lab tech was going to crack up laughing recently when my daughter had to get quite a bit of blood drawn for tests. From the look his face he had not previously been exposed to someone saying, "Fudgebiscuits!! Fringe benefits!! CHICKEN IN A BASKET!!!" through gritted teeth. She's got a whole arsenal of them.
 
Posted by Curiosity killed ... (# 11770) on :
 
My father's language is so colourful that he's known as "Bollocks Bill". When irritated by someone he often wants their guts for garters.

Currently the team at work reckon it's easier to take the stapler, usually, but they'll also walk off with the hole punch, sellotape, scissors, etc from the admin office, rather than look in the staff room where I have carefully provided them with all they need. The next person to do it, I have warned them, I am going to staple their balls to the desk.

(I get incredibly frustrated when I'm trying to tidy the desk, usually late at night, and have to search the building for the stapler and/or hole punch.)
 
Posted by Kelly Alves (# 2522) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Trudy Scrumptious:
My fifteen-year-old daughter refuses to swear even now that the kids have reached the age where we've accepted that under extreme circumstances they will sometimes hear us swear and we'll hear them swear. She is the queen of the creative made-up fake swear words. She also hates getting needles, and I thought the lab tech was going to crack up laughing recently when my daughter had to get quite a bit of blood drawn for tests. From the look his face he had not previously been exposed to someone saying, "Fudgebiscuits!! Fringe benefits!! CHICKEN IN A BASKET!!!" through gritted teeth. She's got a whole arsenal of them.
Oh my God, I am stealing all of those. : notworthy:
I have to come up with replacement words when expressing my emotions in the classroom, and I tend to go all Yosemite Sam-- Dagnabbit, doggone it, what the Sam Hill, etc.
(Oh, I forgot Godfrey Daniels.)

When I am at my least inspired I squeak out, " oh, piffle." [Hot and Hormonal]

[ 19. December 2015, 18:16: Message edited by: Kelly Alves ]
 
Posted by Schroedinger's cat (# 64) on :
 
My dad used to use "Blood and Fire" which I always thought was quite a good one. And no, he wasn't a salvationist. I suspect, out of our hearing, he may have used slightly stronger language, but that was never part of his usual vocabulary, despite his very working class background.

It is probably the fact that he worked for himself (and only 1 employee some of the time) that meant he never got exposed to the more common language usage.
 
Posted by ArachnidinElmet (# 17346) on :
 
In a similar vein, my gran was a big fan of 'Hell's Bells...and buckets of blood'.

I'm a pretty enthusiastic swearer in vertain situations, but sometimes only a 'Chuffin Nora' will do.

The worst directed at me? "Get your tits out": once from a random teenager walking past me and once from a moving white van. [Mad]
 
Posted by Pigwidgeon (# 10192) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Curiosity killed ...:
The next person to do it, I have warned them, I am going to staple their balls to the desk.
And what if the miscreant is a woman?

(I do understand your frustration, as staplers, tape dispensers, rulers, scissors, etc. seem to party at night and not remember their way home in the morning.)
 
Posted by Ariel (# 58) on :
 
"Fracking" is a recent addition to my vocabulary. I feel it should be used more widely.

quote:
Originally posted by Kelly Alves:
When I am at my least inspired I squeak out, " oh, piffle." [Hot and Hormonal]
For me it's "oh bother" though normally I'm somewhat more forthright.
 
Posted by Albertus (# 13356) on :
 
There are times when I derive a good deal of comfort from this (probably NSFW).
 
Posted by Banner Lady (# 10505) on :
 
Heard a solid country woman declare "Sugar Honey Iced Tea!" the other day when confronted with a minor disaster. I am definitely lifting that one for future use....
 
Posted by Firenze (# 619) on :
 
A friend's granddaughter - aged 8 or 9 - was told off for using a Rude Word to her teacher. Her response: 'I felt it was appropriate'.
 
Posted by Stetson (# 9597) on :
 
My dad, who even on a good day had what could be called a sour, world-weary disposition, would occassionally reply "God only knows, and he'll never tell", when asked a question to which he didn't know the answer.

I suppose that could be construed as blasphemous, since, at least the way he delivered the phrase, it contained a slight resentment that God withholds information from people.
 
Posted by Amanda B. Reckondwythe (# 5521) on :
 
Personally I'm fond of the line from the cult classic film Freaks: "Holy jumping Christmas!"

I also like "Mother of God", which sounds better in German: "Gottesmutter!"
 
Posted by Sparrow (# 2458) on :
 
I'm rather fond of "Bummocks!" which was a favourite of Sarah Kennedy who used to do the morning show on BBC Radio 2. Lovely conflation of two naughty words to mean absolutely nothing but still sounds sweary!
 
Posted by Uncle Pete (# 10422) on :
 
I have a friend (who used to be my supervisor back in Mevil Dewey's day) whose strongest expression, delivered in low or high tones was "OH SUGAR!

I am pleased to report that, in retirement, she has graduated to Oh Lordy.

A bunch of us were playing a word game once and she used the euphemism "frig" claiming it was short for refrigerator. In unaminity we disallowed it. Her partner took some delight in explaining the use of the word. She was mortified, lost her concentration, and the game too.
 
Posted by Stercus Tauri (# 16668) on :
 
An expressive and very useful Québecois cuss usually comes out as tabarnac' (tabernacle), which is quite dreadful to the ears of a respectable French speaking Catholic, but seems harmless to the average Anglo. There are various ways to tone it down, like tabarnouche that is even more useful and well known to our children. The cultural differences can be funny, and it isn't shocking to hear in normal conversation of something that was messed up as being tout fucké, which probably doesn't need to be translated
 
Posted by Piglet (# 11803) on :
 
Gordon Bennett is a very useful chap in such circumstances.

There's a lady in our congregation who is probably the only person who still says "jumping Jehosophat!" - she's certainly the only person I've ever heard say it.
 
Posted by Uncle Pete (# 10422) on :
 
Quebecois slang is so useful. Tabernac! is one, as noted above, calice another. A knowledgeable Christian could compile a whole list of words dealing with the furnishings of a church. It's all in the tone of voice.

On a slightly tangential topic, my mother was once fed up with juvenile swearing or use of "bad words" She instituted a swear pot to which we had to contribute a penny if caught. It lasted a week, because we monitored her speech as well, and she was soon out of pennies. She kept her ill-gotten gains though. [Waterworks]

[ 19. December 2015, 21:11: Message edited by: Uncle Pete ]
 
Posted by Curiosity killed ... (# 11770) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Pigwidgeon:
quote:
Originally posted by Curiosity killed ...:
The next person to do it, I have warned them, I am going to staple their balls to the desk.
And what if the miscreant is a woman?
It still applies, I'll staple their boobs to the desk. I also have a staple gun locked away.

(Actually, the most likely culprits are male)
 
Posted by jacobsen (# 14998) on :
 
An old boyfriend of mine used to say "shit and derision", and in a language school for |Italian students "Spaghetti!" spat out with attitude (the word, not the dish) was quite effective. The nuns at my school used to say "Mother of God" - I quite like it. So genteel.
 
Posted by Roseofsharon (# 9657) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Stetson:
My dad, who even on a good day had what could be called a sour, world-weary disposition, would occassionally reply "God only knows, and he'll never tell", when asked a question to which he didn't know the answer.

I suppose that could be construed as blasphemous, since, at least the way he delivered the phrase, it contained a slight resentment that God withholds information from people.
That brought to mind one that my mother used to use. The first two words are well enough known, and said, but I don't recall hearing anyone else completing the phrase:
"Jesus wept - and well He might, to see such sinners in His sight!"
 
Posted by Graven Image (# 8755) on :
 
Good old Mom used, Pop Rose," on extreme occasions.
 
Posted by Dogwalker (# 14135) on :
 
My father, who was of the World War II generation, could be quite expressive. And funny.

Laughing at him at such times was not a good idea, let me tell you!
 
Posted by Lamb Chopped (# 5528) on :
 
I have a fondness for "eggsucking son of a porcupine," stolen from a book, of course. But it has such lovely consonants! Besides making small children stare at me in awe.
 
Posted by no prophet's flag is set so... (# 15560) on :
 
Reading this, methinks "deck the halls" might be a good seasonal oath. My usual potty mouth comment is "bloody hell". Which is something that lost my dessert several times. I thought it had an aura of sophistication when a teenager with less questions than I have today.

My dear dear uncle used to say "shit on my old bald head" as an expression of astonishment, even in polite company and get away with it. Today it'd probably be easier to get away with it, given the shortage of polite company these days.

I wonder what the strongest oath uttered from pulpit ever has been. I did hear a Venerable get called venereal once, but this seemed to be an accident at post church coffee and the person who said it was so esteemed everyone pretended it was said correctly. I wondered later if there was any truth to the mistake given later comments in other ocassions.
 
Posted by Jack o' the Green (# 11091) on :
 
Sometimes I say "Bowsers and tanks!" which I heard on the news as part of a BBC news report during a water crisis which occurred at the start of Gordon Brown's Premiership. The phrase appealed for some reason. An Irish friend is far from subtle. When exasperation finally takes over, she has been known to exclaim "Cuntus-fuckin-buntus!"
 
Posted by crunt (# 1321) on :
 
Sock sucker
 
Posted by Welease Woderwick (# 10424) on :
 
In the film Parting Glances two of the characters smash a whole collection of crockery and at the end one puts his hand to his mouth and says:

quote:
Oh dear, what have we done?

 
Posted by ExclamationMark (# 14715) on :
 
Drat and bother.
 
Posted by Firenze (# 619) on :
 
Man on a bicycle!

My mother would sometimes be maddened into 'Jesus, Mary and Joseph!'

My grandmother was a good deal less pious and would snarl 'Shut your mouth and give your arse a chance!'
 
Posted by Uncle Pete (# 10422) on :
 
I am so stealing that one!

Shut your mouth and give your arse a chance!

for those times when I am at my absolute rope's end.

[Overused]
 
Posted by Galloping Granny (# 13814) on :
 
Many years ago on the beach I passed a small boy who had built a sand castle and was happily patting it into shape as he sang "bugger,bugger,bugger...." He must have found it a very satisfying sound.
Long afterwards this tv commercial gave the word a new respectability and it became the oath of choice in our house (we loved the dog).
Of course in, I think, Solomon Islands pidgin, 'bagarap' is the formal word for broken, spoiled, not working.

Another version of the 'hell's bells' is 'hell's bells and buggy wheels'.

GG
 
Posted by Kittyville (# 16106) on :
 
Two more Irish ones from my childhood:

"I hope you die roaring!" In response to some egregious slight or other; and

"[So and so] said..." "[So and so]! If he knew Latin, he'd say mass" indicating that so and so always had something to say on any given subject, with shades of this being due to fondness of the sound of his voice,
 
Posted by Lothlorien (# 4927) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Galloping Granny:
Many years ago on the beach I passed a small boy who had built a sand castle and was happily patting it into shape as he sang "bugger,bugger,bugger...." He must have found it a very satisfying sound.
Long afterwards this tv commercial gave the word a new respectability and it became the oath of choice in our house (we loved the dog).
Of course in, I think, Solomon Islands pidgin, 'bagarap' is the formal word for broken, spoiled, not working.

Another version of the 'hell's bells' is 'hell's bells and buggy wheels'.

GG
GG, my second grandchild was about fifteen months old when those ads were around. She was an early walker and talker. At a family dinner one night, she was pushing a stroller around, laden with various toys. She hit a wall and the toys fell out. "Oh bugger!" she said, loudly. My eldest son, her uncle, nearly fell off his chair laughing. He was triumphant. Unknown to any one else he had been coaxing her in it. To hear it said so appropriately was very funny.
 
Posted by jedijudy (# 333) on :
 
My favorite is Rats. If I'm really perturbed, it's Razzle Frazzle.

My mother never said naughty words until the three of us were grown and out of the nest. I'm still taken aback when she uses what has turned out to be her favorite: shit.

My grandmother who was the queen of propriety once played Scrabble with my siblings and me, and chose shit as her word. I can still hear her giggling.
 
Posted by Penny S (# 14768) on :
 
I picked up swearing at the Congregational Church Badminton Club!

The words are stored in the brain differently from normal language, and using them can reduce pain sensitivity. I suppose "Fishcakes", "Sugar", "Hell's Teeth" and such like can be imbued with that power, given enough explosive consonants.
 
Posted by Stercus Tauri (# 16668) on :
 
The oddest one I've heard was years ago from my wife's reverend grandfather in Montana. Someone said something he didn't believe, and he retorted, "So's your old man!" Upon further enquiry to my father-in-law, it was a familiar one, but I've never heard it since.
 
Posted by Pomona (# 17175) on :
 
Like Jo March, 'Christopher Columbus!'.
 
Posted by Carex (# 9643) on :
 
We tend to more tame language in (parts) of my family. My grandfather used "Oh pshaw" as his highest (public) expression of disappointment. My mother occasionally came out with "Hell's bells and panther tracks". I usually use "Oh grump!"

Having worked in logging camps and the like, I've been around a lot of swearing, but not necessarily very creative. Perhaps the most extensive outbreak of swearing directed at me was at a professional meeting between two high-tech companies, in response to the charts I had prepared showing the correlation between two measurements. I wasn't there myself, but my manager later recounted the details of the response from our customer's technical lead, who rattled through at least half a dozen profanities in his surprise that we were measuring characteristics at least an order of magnitude better than he thought was possible.

(It seems that many high-tech companies have a very competent, high level employee whose salty public expressions are tolerated in light of the value of their other contributions.)
 
Posted by Galloping Granny (# 13814) on :
 
There's always 'Bum!' or, in extreme cases, 'Double bum!!'

Many years ago I was talking to my aunt, who had what today would be considered a pretty informal child-care operation, when a small girl came up to her and reported in a shocked tone, 'Miss C, Terry said "Bottom"!'

GG
 
Posted by Drifting Star (# 12799) on :
 
I once shared an office with someone who would exclaim 'Blooming!' when provoked. That was odd in itself (so odd that I still occasionally use it myself.) However, the reason it was most memorable was because of a grammar pedant who also shared our office, who would collapse onto her desk practically sobbing, 'You can't just say 'Blooming'! It's an adjective!!!'
 
Posted by georgiaboy (# 11294) on :
 
A priest colleague (a few years back) referred in a sermon to someone as a 'schmuck.' I asked him afterwards if he was aware that was a Yiddish word (derived from the Polish) for penis. He was not particularly concerned, saying that he thought most folks would take it to mean 'jerk,' which was what he meant.

I did point out, however, that there was at least one person in the congo who was fluent in Yiddish.
 
Posted by basso (# 4228) on :
 
My father was partial to "Oh, balls".

He stopped using that phrase after I took it for a test drive one day in front of company. I don't recall how old I was, but surely old enough to know better.
 
Posted by Penny S (# 14768) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by georgiaboy:
A priest colleague (a few years back) referred in a sermon to someone as a 'schmuck.' I asked him afterwards if he was aware that was a Yiddish word (derived from the Polish) for penis. He was not particularly concerned, saying that he thought most folks would take it to mean 'jerk,' which was what he meant.

I did point out, however, that there was at least one person in the congo who was fluent in Yiddish.
I'm not convinced that jerk is entirely kosher, either.
 
Posted by Amanda B. Reckondwythe (# 5521) on :
 
Which is why polite Jews will use shmoe or schlemiel instead. Not quite the same meaning, but close enough.
 
Posted by Huia (# 3473) on :
 
We had a young relative staying whose language was sometimes unacceptable to his mother. Mum taught him Muckleflugger which she later claimed was a place in Scotland. His mother was a bit taken aback at his new vocabulary.

Huia
 
Posted by Kelly Alves (# 2522) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Amanda B. Reckondwythe:
Which is why polite Jews will use shmoe or schlemiel instead. Not quite the same meaning, but close enough.
A schlemiel is a guy who trips and spills the soup. A schlematzl is the guy the soup lands on. Just in case anyone was wondering.
 
Posted by lilBuddha (# 14333) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Penny S:
quote:
Originally posted by georgiaboy:
A priest colleague (a few years back) referred in a sermon to someone as a 'schmuck.' I asked him afterwards if he was aware that was a Yiddish word (derived from the Polish) for penis. He was not particularly concerned, saying that he thought most folks would take it to mean 'jerk,' which was what he meant.

I did point out, however, that there was at least one person in the congo who was fluent in Yiddish.
I'm not convinced that jerk is entirely kosher, either.
The etymology is uncertain. Possibly railway related.
 
Posted by David Goode (# 9224) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Uncle Pete:
I am so stealing that one!

Shut your mouth and give your arse a chance!

for those times when I am at my absolute rope's end.
You may also enjoy one of my favourites: "Don't be a [noun of choice, with optional preceding adjective] all your life; take today off".
 
Posted by The Phantom Flan Flinger (# 8891) on :
 
Many years ago, I heard someone use "f*** me backwards with a Chinese broomstick" as an expression of exasperation.

I immediately adopted it, often shortened just to "with a Chinese broomstick".
 
Posted by Eutychus (# 3081) on :
 
The (English-speaking) pastor I trained with would, in cases of extreme provocation, exclaim "pigs' ears!"
 
Posted by Truman White (# 17290) on :
 
I had a pal who went for "Blood and sand." Never could work out why. He was from Wigan.

"Tartarus" has a certain ring to it (needs a posh accent to really land well mind...)
 
Posted by Bibaculus (# 18528) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by The Phantom Flan Flinger:
Many years ago, I heard someone use "f*** me backwards with a Chinese broomstick" as an expression of exasperation.
Is that a curse, or a request?

I have heard the Abbot President of the English Benedictine Congregation use, without irony, 'dash' and 'drat'. Strong stuff, I fear.
 
Posted by Piglet (# 11803) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Huia:
... Muckleflugger which she later claimed was a place in Scotland ...
Spelled correctly, it is. [Big Grin]

A former colleague used to use "cheese and biscuits!" at points of frustration (usually when dealing with a recalcitrant photocopier); "Shostakovich!" is also quite useful.
 
Posted by Stetson (# 9597) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Kelly Alves:
quote:
Originally posted by Amanda B. Reckondwythe:
Which is why polite Jews will use shmoe or schlemiel instead. Not quite the same meaning, but close enough.
A schlemiel is a guy who trips and spills the soup. A schlematzl is the guy the soup lands on. Just in case anyone was wondering.
Years ago, I saw a poster put up on a lamppost by my city's contingent of neo-nazis. It showed a guy who was supposed to be an average middle-class citizen, somehow getting beaten up or otherwise abused by immigrants and left-wing bureaucrats.

An arrow was pointed at the hapless citizen, bearing the legend "Typical Canadian schmuck".

A friend of mine observed that political-correctness really has gotten out of hand, when even neo-nazis feel obligated to include Yiddish in their propaganda.

[ 21. December 2015, 16:11: Message edited by: Stetson ]
 
Posted by Stercus Tauri (# 16668) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Kelly Alves:
quote:
Originally posted by Amanda B. Reckondwythe:
Which is why polite Jews will use shmoe or schlemiel instead. Not quite the same meaning, but close enough.
A schlemiel is a guy who trips and spills the soup. A schlematzl is the guy the soup lands on. Just in case anyone was wondering.
A variant on that (heard in New York) is that the schlematzl is one who sees the banana skin in time, but trips on it anyway. I felt personally touched by that.
 
Posted by Eigon (# 4917) on :
 
Seeing Shostakovitch mentioned reminded me of the old R White's lemonade advert, where the polar bear drinking the lemonade shouts out "Rimsky Korsakov!" at one point, a swear word which I've occasionally found quite useful.

And when I was a kid, my dad was the sort of car driver who shouted insults at other drivers as he went along. Being considerate, when we two kids were in the back of the car, he used to restrain himself and just shout "Pudding!"
 
Posted by Eigon (# 4917) on :
 
Sorry to double post, but I've just noticed Truman White mention "Blood and Sand!" and a man from Wigan.
That originally came from a silent film about bullfighting, starring Rudolf Valentino, and was taken up as a popular swearing phrase in Lancashire.
 
Posted by crunt (# 1321) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Eigon:
And when I was a kid, my dad was the sort of car driver who shouted insults at other drivers as he went along. Being considerate, when we two kids were in the back of the car, he used to restrain himself and just shout "Pudding!"
I used to say a very bad word (very, very bad) when I was driving, and a regular passenger asked me not to say it any more, so I changed it to 'BIGOT!'
 
Posted by jacobsen (# 14998) on :
 
And in case it has not been mentioned so far, there is always "Hell's bells and buckets of blood."
 
Posted by Kelly Alves (# 2522) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Stercus Tauri:
quote:
Originally posted by Kelly Alves:
quote:
Originally posted by Amanda B. Reckondwythe:
Which is why polite Jews will use shmoe or schlemiel instead. Not quite the same meaning, but close enough.
A schlemiel is a guy who trips and spills the soup. A schlematzl is the guy the soup lands on. Just in case anyone was wondering.
A variant on that (heard in New York) is that the schlematzl is one who sees the banana skin in time, but trips on it anyway. I felt personally touched by that.
Buddy Hackett did a longish routine about the Schlemiel/ Schlematzl dynamic. Like you, when I heard it I kept identifying with the Schlematzl. [Big Grin]
 
Posted by The Phantom Flan Flinger (# 8891) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Eigon:
Seeing Shostakovitch mentioned reminded me of the old R White's lemonade advert, where the polar bear drinking the lemonade shouts out "Rimsky Korsakov!" at one point,
Didn't the polar bear advertise Cresta?
 
Posted by Piglet (# 11803) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Eigon:
Seeing Shostakovitch mentioned reminded me of the old R White's lemonade advert, where the polar bear drinking the lemonade shouts out "Rimsky Korsakov!" ...
When D. was a student in the 1970s, he and some of his more eccentric* friends used to go to prominent bits of Bristol and shout "Rimsky Korsakov" at the tops of their voices.

* for "eccentric" read "drunken" ... [Devil]
 
Posted by Eigon (# 4917) on :
 
You may be right about Cresta, Phantom Flan Flinger. I've just got it mixed up in my head with the Secret Lemonade Drinker song.
 
Posted by Snags (# 15351) on :
 
This will categorically out me to anyone who knows me in Real Life, but I have a friend who never* actually swears. She does, however, have an excellent line in non-sweary swearing, from the simple and effective "Laaa!" (said as a loud and sudden ejaculation) through to more convoluted phrases.

My all-time favourite occurred many moons ago. We were both on the diaconate at the time, and prone to get fed up with the endless, tedious, pointless, circular discussions that happened just so everyone could say their piece and Feel Important. After one epically long piece of vocal masturbation from a colleague my chum lifted her head from the table in quite a stately fashion, threw it back, and all the way through was going "Oh Fffffffffff...fffff..."

Oh no! I thought, she's finally going to crack and say FFS, which is what I was thinking.

"Oh fffff ... ffffff .fffff ..fFFFFFLIPPITY-FLOP!! Are we REALLY still talking about this?"

And silence fell.


(*Now commuted to 'rarely' and only mildly)
 
Posted by Penny S (# 14768) on :
 
Shouldn't that asterisk have led to "hardly ever"?

[ 23. December 2015, 19:45: Message edited by: Penny S ]
 
Posted by Snags (# 15351) on :
 
It sort of does, but for some reason my addled brain put the footnote in brackets, too.
 
Posted by BessLane (# 15176) on :
 
I had a friend once who worked in a very uptight office. My friend, who had quite the potty mouth indeed, taught herself to mutter "Tomato!" when provoked. Tomato was the last (and only spoken) word in a very long a filthy list of curse words.

I use Son of a Buck or Son of a Biscuit Eater quite regularly...
 
Posted by Macrina (# 8807) on :
 
My great grandfather (I have been told) was fond of "Oh Helgeland, Dogger and Fortis!"

(UK Shippies may recognise some current and former areas from the shipping forecast)
 
Posted by Niteowl (# 15841) on :
 
I had a friend back in the late 70's who use to use Ho Chi Minh's name as a curse word. I picked it up and still use it, though it clearly shows my age. My other favorite is shit, because it just fits so many situations.
 
Posted by Lamb Chopped (# 5528) on :
 
semi-random tangent: When my husband was reunited with his sister from Vietnam after twenty years of separation, they hugged, kissed, and then sat down to have a fart war and sing "Ho Chi Minh's Underwear" together.
 
Posted by Bibaculus (# 18528) on :
 
My post Christmas entertainment has been watching 'All Gas and Gaiters', the 1960s sitcom set in a Cathedral close. the Bishop's Chaplain, played by Derek Nimmo, uses the expression 'Oh Moses!' when deeply moved.
 
Posted by St. Gwladys (# 14504) on :
 
When dealing with a young child, "Oh Poo" can take on great significance and import.
 
Posted by Offeiriad (# 14031) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Macrina:
My great grandfather (I have been told) was fond of "Oh Helgeland, Dogger and Fortis!"

(UK Shippies may recognise some current and former areas from the shipping forecast)
Heligoland, Dogger and Forties, surely? [Big Grin]
 
Posted by Moo (# 107) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Eigon:
And when I was a kid, my dad was the sort of car driver who shouted insults at other drivers as he went along. Being considerate, when we two kids were in the back of the car, he used to restrain himself and just shout "Pudding!"
My uncle used to say, "rump-fed runyon". I later learned that it's from Shakespeare.

Moo
 
Posted by Wet Kipper (# 1654) on :
 
within my circle of cousins, we always used to refer in hushed tones of "The day that Grandma swore" - epecially when referring to anything else which was a rare occurence

it wasn't until a few years back - all as grown adults -when someone referred to it again, and in discussion we realised that we each remembered a separate occasion, so Grandma was perhaps not as reserved as we thought !
 


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