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Source: (consider it)
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Thread: say what?
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Lamb Chopped
Ship's kebab
# 5528
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Posted
This is for random weirdness you hear or over hear.
Tonight my son, apropos of nothing, said: "It smells like rectangles in here."
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Er, this is what I've been up to (book).
Oh, that you would rend the heavens and come down!
Posts: 20059 | From: off in left field somewhere | Registered: Feb 2004
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mousethief
Ship's Thieving Rodent
# 953
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Lamb Chopped:
This is for random weirdness you hear or over hear.
Tonight my son, apropos of nothing, said: "It smells like rectangles in here."
Sounds like synesthesia.
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This is the last sig I'll ever write for you...
Posts: 63536 | From: Washington | Registered: Jul 2001
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Schroedinger's cat
Ship's cool cat
# 64
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Posted
In the work kitchen yesterday, someone came in to hear the phrase "The one with a leather strap and feathers". TBH, as I was in the kitchen for the whole conversation, it didn't make much more sense.
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Blog
Music for your enjoyment
Lord may all my hard times be healing times
take out this broken heart and renew my mind.
Posts: 18859 | From: At the bottom of a deep dark well. | Registered: May 2001
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Sipech
Shipmate
# 16870
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Posted
I was a folk gig last night and one of the acts tried to persuade us "if you love someone, give them a chicken."
I'm not convinced. ![[Confused]](confused.gif)
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I try to be self-deprecating; I'm just not very good at it.
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TheAlethiophile
Posts: 3791 | From: On the corporate ladder | Registered: Jan 2012
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Bishops Finger
Shipmate
# 5430
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Posted
Synesthesia is fun. Today is Wednesday, which is bright yellow.
IJ
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Our words are giants when they do us an injury, and dwarfs when they do us a service. (Wilkie Collins)
Posts: 10151 | From: Behind The Wheel Again! | Registered: Jan 2004
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Ariel
Shipmate
# 58
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Posted
"The thing I'll always remember about Maurice is his hatchet face and pencil moustache."
Posts: 25445 | Registered: May 2001
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Penny S
Shipmate
# 14768
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Posted
I heard a teenage girl explaining to her mother as she passed: "Those primary school children, they can spell diarrhoea. I can't spell diarrhoea."
And I'm still wishing I knew the context. This was near Dulwich, and the accent you might expect there. (Cross pond - middle class of the UK sort, educated, and not in your average all comers school.)
Posts: 5833 | Registered: May 2009
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Sparrow
Shipmate
# 2458
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Posted
Conversation between two women behind me on the bus: "She worked for the National Society for the Prevention of Children."
(n.b. for Americans: over here we have (or had, I don't know what it is called now) the National Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children.)
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For I am persuaded that neither death, nor life,nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present nor things to come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Posts: 3149 | From: Bottom right hand corner of the UK | Registered: Mar 2002
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Baptist Trainfan
Shipmate
# 15128
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Posted
That follows nicely a TV advert (for, I think, washing capsules) I saw twice last night, which ends by saying, "Always keep away from children".
[ 16. November 2016, 13:58: Message edited by: Baptist Trainfan ]
Posts: 9750 | From: The other side of the Severn | Registered: Sep 2009
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Baptist Trainfan
Shipmate
# 15128
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Sparrow:
Conversation between two women behind me on the bus: "She worked for the National Society for the Prevention of Children."
Could have been thinking of Marie Stopes, or the Pregnancy Advisory Service, perhaps? ![[Devil]](graemlins/devil.gif)
Posts: 9750 | From: The other side of the Severn | Registered: Sep 2009
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L'organist
Shipmate
# 17338
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Posted
Some years ago sitting on a bus with a friend with a full-spine (milwaukee) brace, two ladies behind us didn't even lower their voices when discussing what might be the reason for the metalwork, finishing off with "I 'spect she's one of those plastics - its marvellous what they can do with them now"
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Rara temporum felicitate ubi sentire quae velis et quae sentias dicere licet
Posts: 4950 | From: somewhere in England... | Registered: Sep 2012
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Graven Image
Shipmate
# 8755
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Posted
Conversation I had as a lunch time greeter at the local senior center.
Lady came through the door and asked, "Are they having fish today, cause I don't like fish, don't eat it."
Me. "No, the meal today is meat loaf and mashed potatoes."
Lady turning to leave, " I will not be staying then. I thought it was fish."
Posts: 2641 | From: Third planet from the sun. USA | Registered: Nov 2004
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Sioni Sais
Shipmate
# 5713
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Posted
Also on a bus, somewhere in London. Two women chatting: "She's had a baby boy. I can't remember his name, it's one of those new-fangled ones, Benjamin or Adam."
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"He isn't Doctor Who, he's The Doctor"
(Paul Sinha, BBC)
Posts: 24276 | From: Newport, Wales | Registered: Apr 2004
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Ariel
Shipmate
# 58
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Posted
(Passing by a couple chatting) "Yes, but Toby has a dong the size of Great Britain."
Posts: 25445 | Registered: May 2001
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Brenda Clough
Shipmate
# 18061
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Posted
![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif) ![[Killing me]](graemlins/killingme.gif)
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Science fiction and fantasy writer with a Patreon page
Posts: 6378 | From: Washington DC | Registered: Mar 2014
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DonLogan2
Shipmate
# 15608
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Posted
We have 3x A3 size sheets of paper in our church office with all these odd snippets of conversations such as;
"[This] church is an experiment in not being dead.."
or
"The problem with [this denomination] is that there is a lack of communication..." [muffled voice from me next door in the prayer room] "No it isn`t!"
or
"He just swans in here does his business and then leaves..."
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“I have of late, but wherefore I know not, lost all my mirth... "
Posts: 359 | From: the very depths | Registered: Apr 2010
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L'organist
Shipmate
# 17338
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Posted
Overheard conversation about a mutual friend suddenly widdowed: She's fine. You've got to admit, she's a natural widow.
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Rara temporum felicitate ubi sentire quae velis et quae sentias dicere licet
Posts: 4950 | From: somewhere in England... | Registered: Sep 2012
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Baptist Trainfan
Shipmate
# 15128
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Posted
Heard (not by me) on a steam heritage railway many years ago:
Passenger to volunteer: "Can we get on the train now, or do we have to wait for it to arrive?"
And I heard the following conversation on the Bluebell Railway as locomotive no. 75027 (green, pulling coal tender behind it) arrived in Kingscote station:
Mother to 4-year old daughter: "Look! Here comes Thomas!"
Daughter to mother (scathingly as only a small girl can be): "That's not Thomas, it's Gordon".
Posts: 9750 | From: The other side of the Severn | Registered: Sep 2009
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Kelly Alves
Bunny with an axe
# 2522
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Posted
Years back I was watching two seven year old boys toss a foursquare ball back and forth, silently, on the lawn of the after school center where I was working. After a minute one of them held the ball after he caught it, said the phrase, "The udder of a cow," in a sort of radio announcer voice, and then went back to tossing as if nothing had happened.
Blink. Blink. I walked over.
"Excuse me, guys, I don't mean to interrupt you, I just to make sure I am not hearing things. E., did you just say,'the udder of a cow'"?
They both looked at each other and began to smirk and giggle, then shrugged at me.
"Ok, thanks. At least I know I'm not going crazy. Next question: why did you say that? You're not in trouble or anything, I'm just curious."
E. told this convoluted story about the two of them tossing around a party balloon at school, and at some point the other boy stopped and began pulling the tied end as if he were milking it, giving birth to the catch phrase.
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I cannot expect people to believe “
Jesus loves me, this I know” of they don’t believe “Kelly loves me, this I know.”
Kelly Alves, somewhere around 2003.
Posts: 35076 | From: Pura Californiana | Registered: Mar 2002
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churchgeek
Have candles, will pray
# 5557
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Posted
Back in 2009, I was walking home from my MA graduation (from Berkeley to Oakland, CA), and smiled and nodded at a man who was leaving a building and heading for his car. He greeted me back, so I said, "How ya doin'?" To which he replied: "Better than most!" [slight pause] "No one's shootin' at me!"
I hadn't realized until then that most people are being shot at.
I wish I remembered the exact details now, but once I was on a bus in Oakland, and heard two people behind me, a woman and a man. He was apparently from Eritrea; I assume from her accent she was native to the Bay Area. At one point, she asked him how many kids he had, and he said something like 50. (That's the detail I don't remember - maybe it was more.) And she didn't react with surprise at all, just kept conversing as though it were perfectly normal to have 50 kids! Obviously, not all of them with one woman. I'm guessing. ![[Biased]](wink.gif)
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I reserve the right to change my mind.
My article on the Virgin of Vladimir
Posts: 7773 | From: Detroit | Registered: Feb 2004
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georgiaboy
Shipmate
# 11294
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Posted
Alright, this is apocryphal so maybe it doesn't count, but ...
Three senior ladies on a London bus:
Lady 1: Pardon, is this Wembley?
Lady 2: No dear, it's Thursday.
Lady 3: So am I. There's a pub, let's have a pint.
Heard I-don't-remember-where and a long time ago.
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You can't retire from a calling.
Posts: 1675 | From: saint meinrad, IN | Registered: Apr 2006
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St. Gwladys
Shipmate
# 14504
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Posted
Similar to the story of the two Valleys ladies talking about fabrics in the old Pontypridd street market:
"Pink I do like but purple I do rather, but puce, oh Duce, I do go scatty over puce"
(Translation out of Wenglish - I like pink but prefer purple but my favourite colour is puce")
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"I say - are you a matelot?"
"Careful what you say sir, we're on board ship here"
From "New York Girls", Steeleye Span, Commoners Crown (Voiced by Peter Sellers)
Posts: 3333 | From: Rhymney Valley, South Wales | Registered: Jan 2009
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Pigwidgeon
Ship's Owl
# 10192
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by georgiaboy:
Alright, this is apocryphal so maybe it doesn't count, but ...
Three senior ladies on a London bus:
Lady 1: Pardon, is this Wembley?
Lady 2: No dear, it's Thursday.
Lady 3: So am I. There's a pub, let's have a pint.
Heard I-don't-remember-where and a long time ago.
I seem to recall reading that in a book by P.G. Wodehouse.
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"...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe."
~Tortuf
Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005
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Pigwidgeon
Ship's Owl
# 10192
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Pigwidgeon:
quote:
Originally posted by georgiaboy:
Alright, this is apocryphal so maybe it doesn't count, but ...
Three senior ladies on a London bus:
Lady 1: Pardon, is this Wembley?
Lady 2: No dear, it's Thursday.
Lady 3: So am I. There's a pub, let's have a pint.
Heard I-don't-remember-where and a long time ago.
I seem to recall reading that in a book by P.G. Wodehouse.
Yes, it's PGW.
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"...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe."
~Tortuf
Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005
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ArachnidinElmet
Shipmate
# 17346
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Baptist Trainfan:
That follows nicely a TV advert (for, I think, washing capsules) I saw twice last night, which ends by saying, "Always keep away from children".
[serious tangent]I believe this is related to the recent spate of deaths of small children eating 'liquitabs', which contain extremely caustic detergent, because they are bright and shiny and look like sweets. I don't think (hope) it's advice about not washing your babies[/serious tangent]
In a more cheery vein, I was once on a bus not really listening to the conversation behind me, but caught the ending: "hold on, you're talking about my sister, and I'm talking about my duvet". ![[Eek!]](eek.gif) The mind boggles.
[ 17. November 2016, 19:32: Message edited by: ArachnidinElmet ]
Posts: 1887 | From: the rhubarb triangle | Registered: Sep 2012
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North East Quine
Curious beastie
# 13049
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Posted
Man ahead of me in queue at butcher: I'd like to have a heart and a couple of dozen teeth for Thursday, please.
(I asked him what he was planning to cook and it turned out he was a biology teacher ordering supplies.)
Posts: 6414 | From: North East Scotland | Registered: Oct 2007
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Pigwidgeon
Ship's Owl
# 10192
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Posted
Shortly before Halloween I was in the grocery store. A man further up the aisle went up to a woman stocking shelves with candy and asked her where to find something. She very nicely explained that she didn't know. "I don't work for the store," she said, "I'm from Mars."
(I realized that she meant the Mars Candy Company, but I thanked her for the laugh.)
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"...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe."
~Tortuf
Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005
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Margaret
Shipmate
# 283
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Posted
My mother had a pampered and very picky cat who wouldn't eat cat food but preferred ox or lamb hearts, so she had to chop them up for it. My grandmother lived with us and one day her doctor called while my mother was feeding the cat, so she went to the door absent-mindedly clutching the bloodied knife. The doctor looked at it in some surprise and she said hastily, "Oh, I was only cutting up the cat's heart."
Posts: 2456 | From: West Midlands UK | Registered: May 2001
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Stetson
Shipmate
# 9597
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Ariel:
(Passing by a couple chatting) "Yes, but Toby has a dong the size of Great Britain."
Nicola Sturgeon might have something to say about that.
Posts: 6574 | From: back and forth between bible belts | Registered: Jun 2005
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Stetson
Shipmate
# 9597
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Posted
Many years ago, walking into the lunchroom at work(a well-known international NGO), I overheard the following exchange between two women...
FIRST WOMAN: So, after I heard that, my respect for her went right downhill.
SECOND WOMAN: Yeah, but that's still pretty good foreplay.
[ 20. November 2016, 06:54: Message edited by: Stetson ]
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I have the power...Lucifer is lord!
Posts: 6574 | From: back and forth between bible belts | Registered: Jun 2005
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Jengie jon
Semper Reformanda
# 273
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Posted
"these pews are pretty comfortable"
or words to that effect.
As it was part of a mumbled conversation pre-worship, I wondered if I was in a service that was being Mystery Worshipped.
Jengie
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"To violate a persons ability to distinguish fact from fantasy is the epistemological equivalent of rape." Noretta Koertge
Back to my blog
Posts: 20894 | From: city of steel, butterflies and rainbows | Registered: May 2001
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Penny S
Shipmate
# 14768
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Posted
Not words, but today I was driving along behind a motorbike with an enclosed sidecar. As I came up to overtake, I noticed it was an unusually long sidecar, and then, as I passed, that it was fitted out as a hearse. It was empty.
Posts: 5833 | Registered: May 2009
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churchgeek
Have candles, will pray
# 5557
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Lamb Chopped:
Heheheh. Maybe he was a school administrator and she was asking about the school population.
Nope. It was definitely about offspring. IIRC his kids were all in Africa. Maybe that's why he wasn't anymore.
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I reserve the right to change my mind.
My article on the Virgin of Vladimir
Posts: 7773 | From: Detroit | Registered: Feb 2004
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Mili
Shipmate
# 3254
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Posted
Yesterday I was on yard duty at a school. In the distance I saw a little girl coming towards me holding something behind her back.I could see what looked like feathers sticking out. "Not a dead bird, not a dead bird!" I muttered. Unfortunately it was a dead and rotting bird. The little girl excitedly told me that there were little things inside the bird wiggling around to bring it back to life. A biology lesson and hygiene lesson followed! I think this topped the time some little girls brought a dead bird up to me that they were attempting to pray back to life.
Posts: 1015 | From: Melbourne, Australia | Registered: Aug 2002
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