Source: (consider it)
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Thread: Heaven: Great unanswered questions of our time
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Spike
Mostly Harmless
# 36
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Posted
There are certain things in life that seem to have no answer. For instance, How does the snow plough driver get to work? Where are the four corners of the earth? Why are flies too stupid to fly out through an open window?
Any others?
Spike [ 10. March 2003, 02:06: Message edited by: Erin ]
-------------------- "May you get to heaven before the devil knows you're dead" - Irish blessing
Posts: 12860 | From: The Valley of Crocuses | Registered: May 2001
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Elizabeth
Shipmate
# 207
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Posted
Where are all the mates to the unmatched socks that come out of the dryer?
-------------------- The Hunger Site is back!
Posts: 669 | From: The Place of Knee Deep Leaves | Registered: May 2001
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jemmi
Shipmate
# 548
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Posted
Why is watching the members of the Big Brother house wash up on E4 sooo interesting when you wouoldn't even watch 'real' people do it?
-------------------- You & I are indidvidual miracles of God this gives me good enough reason to love myself, you & most of all him!
Love in Jesus Jemmi
Posts: 641 | From: Scunthorpe,N.Lincs,England | Registered: Jun 2001
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Ann
Curious
# 94
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Posted
Because A over T is frowned upon?
-------------------- Ann
Posts: 3271 | From: IO 91 PI | Registered: May 2001
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brodavid
Shipmate
# 460
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Posted
Why does the probability of getting behind a large, slow vehicle increase when I am late?
-------------------- Brodavid
"Prayer can do anything that God can do." - E.M. Bounds
Posts: 702 | From: Mississippi, USA | Registered: Jun 2001
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John Donne
Renaissance Man
# 220
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Posted
Why does the kitten poo in the litter tray the minute after I change it?
Posts: 13667 | From: Perth, W.A. | Registered: May 2001
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BTMO
Shipmate
# 723
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Posted
Have we all seen resin cored solder? (rosin cored soder for the Americans...)The stuff isn't much thicker than hair, but has up to 5 cores of flux or resin (or rosin) Here is the weird bit - solder melts at a significantly higher temperature than the flux. How do they get the multicores in the solder?? The can't drill it out and pour the cores in - the rolls are too long. They can't extrude it, because the core is to brittle - it wouldn't extrude. How do they do it?? Oh and why can't you taste your own saliva, why don't magnets run down and why can't you tickle yourself... Cheers, Brenton
-------------------- Show them you care, stalk them.
Posts: 110 | From: Wellington, New Zealand | Registered: Jul 2001
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Old Hundredth
Shipmate
# 112
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Posted
Why, when you are washing up, is there always one teaspoon left at the end and you only find it when you are letting the water out?
-------------------- If I'm not in the Chapel, I'll be in the bar (Reno Sweeney, 'Anything Goes')
Posts: 976 | From: The land of the barm cake | Registered: May 2001
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Alaric the Goth
Shipmate
# 511
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Posted
BTMO, Mrs the Goth (aka The Wench) reckons I would only consider putting my (favourite) bath towel in the laundry bag when it was able to walk part of the way itself. She puts it in every time (sometimes much to my distress).
-------------------- 'Angels and demons dancing in my head, Lunatics and monsters underneath my bed' ('Totem', Rush)
Posts: 3322 | From: West Thriding | Registered: Jun 2001
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CharlottePlatz
Shipmate
# 695
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Posted
Probabbly much of this can be attributed to Sods Law (known in nicer circles as Murphy's law) ie the Law that dictates that anything that can go wrong, will go wrong. Apparently, there is some scientific way to prove that fi you dont want something to happen at a certain time, you can absolutely almost guarantee that it will, such as dropping your toast on the carpet, you just KNOW it will land butter side down - its just the way it goes!! But, for me, I would like to know how it is possible that I can be thinking of a person that I have not seen or heard from in months - and then in the enxt hour, out of the blue, the person phones or emails me. I'm not too sure if I believe in psychic ability - but I wonder, how does this happen?
Posts: 346 | From: NW London | Registered: Jul 2001
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BTMO
Shipmate
# 723
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Posted
quote: CharlottePlatz wrote: But, for me, I would like to know how it is possible that I can be thinking of a person that I have not seen or heard from in months - and then in the enxt hour, out of the blue, the person phones or emails me. I'm not too sure if I believe in psychic ability - but I wonder, how does this happen?
Pretty often. I have dubbed this Brenton's Law (in honour of my good self), also known as the law of threes. If you learn a new word, you will hear at least three times in the next three weeks, and you will never have heard it before! Example, years ago I heard the word "lickspittle" for the first time. I thought to myself, "this is going to crop up again and again over the next few weeks" The next day, the then Prime Minister, Paul Keating used the word describing a political enemy. Or friend. We never knew with Paul. And off course, lickspittle was in the news for weeks after that! Cheers, Brenton
-------------------- Show them you care, stalk them.
Posts: 110 | From: Wellington, New Zealand | Registered: Jul 2001
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BTMO
Shipmate
# 723
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Posted
quote: Some of these posts are perilously reminiscent of a Seinfeld monologue
<Brenton picks up mike, stands on stage. Spotlight. Talks about nothing> Why is it that the poorest communicators in the world gravitate to the internet, where they become the most erudite and vocal people, willing to spill their guts to complete strangers? <canned laughter> Why do villians in American movies always have British accents? I mean is it because of the revolution? Are all Brits evil megalomaniacs, bent on destroying the world? <canned laughter> And what is with that whole destroying the world thing anyway? Where do they plan to live? <quizzical look> <canned laughter> <applause> <music> <roll credits>
-------------------- Show them you care, stalk them.
Posts: 110 | From: Wellington, New Zealand | Registered: Jul 2001
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Newman's Own
Shipmate
# 420
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Posted
Let's try a few Christian (in a few cases, super-Catholic) unsolved mysteries: 1. Were any pagan babies really baptised with the names classes spent hours choosing? (If so, half the population of certain third world nations is named either "Mary" or "Joseph" - most kids knew the "correct" choices.) 2. Why doesn't anyone ever refer to anything good as God's will? 3. Why was it considered saintly to attend the first Mass on Sunday (6:00), when, with few exceptions, the attendess were those who'd been out all night? 4. Why are nuns who dress in fashionable outfits insulted when people do not immediately know they are Sisters? 5. Why, in the old painting of the two children and guardian angel crossing a bridge, do the two kids share one angel? 6. Why do parish or diocesan Coordinators of Whatever complain that "the people" are opposed to this-or-that, while concurrently insisting that this-or-that was implemented because the people wanted it? 7. For all the devotion to saints, why aren't any to the Apostles ever popular? (Except to the obscure Jude, which does not count because they are based on what he's supposed to be able to obtain rather than on who he is.) 8. Since nothing makes much sense in moral theology unless people have a free will, why does the left blame everything on society and the right on the devil? 9. Are there any popular English translations of Latin hymns that bear any resemblance to the original text? 10. Isn't it rather unjust to say that poor Saint Jude, who has enough troubles just from bearing the same name as the traitor, refuses to answer prayers unless the supplicant grants him press coverage?
-------------------- Cheers, Elizabeth “History as Revelation is seldom very revealing, and histories of holiness are full of holes.” - Dermot Quinn
Posts: 6740 | From: Library or pub | Registered: Jun 2001
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The sceptical Atheist
Shipmate
# 379
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Posted
May I be boring? Is that allowed in Heaven?The slow car when in a rush is one that I have thought about. I have noticed that I am often stuck behind slow cars when not in a rush, but it doesn't stick out as much. It is not so memorable. The person appearing just after one has thought of them is like the fact that saying everything is quiet is supposed to tempt fate. I have thought about that too. I work with computers, and let us assume where I work we get a failure on average every 10 minutes. If things start going well, we may get a break of 1/2 hour. That is the point where somebody says "Its going well, isn't it!". The odds are that something will go wrong. That is just probability. So this shows two things. One, perception can lead us to think things are strange when they aren't. Two, I need to get out more!
-------------------- "Faith in God and seventy-five cents will get you a cup of coffee." [Wayne Aiken]
Posts: 293 | From: Staffordshire | Registered: Jun 2001
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Ham'n'Eggs
Ship's Pig
# 629
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Posted
Why do you never see baby pigeons? How did Bazooka Joe lose his right eye? Who is Swee'Pea's father?
-------------------- "...the heresies that men do leave / Are hated most of those they did deceive" - Will S
Posts: 3103 | From: Genghis Khan's sleep depot | Registered: Jun 2001
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Brickbat
Shipmate
# 783
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Posted
Why does lemon juice contain artificial ingredients, when washing-up liquid contains real lemon juice?
-------------------- Life is like an anole... Sometimes it's green, sometimes it's brown, but always it's a small Caribbean lizard...
Posts: 66 | From: Plymouth, England | Registered: Jul 2001
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Brickbat
Shipmate
# 783
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Posted
If a man stands in a forest, speaking, and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong?
-------------------- Life is like an anole... Sometimes it's green, sometimes it's brown, but always it's a small Caribbean lizard...
Posts: 66 | From: Plymouth, England | Registered: Jul 2001
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Spike
Mostly Harmless
# 36
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Posted
Why is it that a brassiere is singular and knickers are plural?
-------------------- "May you get to heaven before the devil knows you're dead" - Irish blessing
Posts: 12860 | From: The Valley of Crocuses | Registered: May 2001
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Siegfried
Ship's ferret
# 29
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Posted
Why do they make fat-free twinkies? Why do people think drinking a diet soda will make a difference if they are having it with a big mac and large fries? However did we get from something like a wolf to something like a pekingnese.. and why did anyone want to?
-------------------- Siegfried Life is just a bowl of cherries!
Posts: 5592 | From: Tallahassee, FL USA | Registered: May 2001
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Brickbat
Shipmate
# 783
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Posted
why does "monosyllable" have so many syllables?
-------------------- Life is like an anole... Sometimes it's green, sometimes it's brown, but always it's a small Caribbean lizard...
Posts: 66 | From: Plymouth, England | Registered: Jul 2001
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Newman's Own
Shipmate
# 420
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Posted
quote: Originally posted by Gill: Isn't it rather unjust to say that poor Saint Jude, who has enough troubles just from bearing the same name as the traitor, refuses to answer prayers unless the supplicant grants him press coverage? Oh! Is THAT why people do that? How VERY weird! Some Catholic newspaper owner, I wouls imagine!
I don't know the exact origin, but remember that, in my childhood (about 40 years ago), the printed "Novena to St Jude" sometimes contained the line at the end "publication must be promised." At the time, I doubt it meant publication in print - the idea was to spread devotion to Jude because, as the prayer referenced, his memory was obscure because he bore the same name as the traitor. It was in adulthood that, in totally secular newspapers, I was amazed to see the many advertisements "Thank you Saint Jude."
-------------------- Cheers, Elizabeth “History as Revelation is seldom very revealing, and histories of holiness are full of holes.” - Dermot Quinn
Posts: 6740 | From: Library or pub | Registered: Jun 2001
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Brickbat
Shipmate
# 783
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Posted
Why is abbreviation such a long word?
-------------------- Life is like an anole... Sometimes it's green, sometimes it's brown, but always it's a small Caribbean lizard...
Posts: 66 | From: Plymouth, England | Registered: Jul 2001
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Emily
Shipmate
# 437
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Posted
What is an Olay? As in Oil of Olay?
Posts: 86 | From: Oxford | Registered: Jun 2001
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Amos
Shipmate
# 44
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Posted
An Olay is an Aloe (as in aloe vera) that has passed through the system of a marketing executive.
-------------------- At the end of the day we face our Maker alongside Jesus--ken
Posts: 7667 | From: Summerisle | Registered: May 2001
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firebrand31
Apprentice
# 1053
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Posted
it is all to do with our thoughts. the positive thought or the negative thought. thoughts make waves... so be positive! next time a negative comes... tell it to ''shove off''.
-------------------- to live above deception and to walk in His light.
Posts: 1 | From: australia | Registered: Aug 2001
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