Source: (consider it)
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Thread: Hell: Could it be... SATAN?
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Hooker's Trick
Admin Emeritus and Guardian of the Gin
# 89
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Posted
I did know before reading the "God of Islam is not the God of the Bible" thread that Satan wrote the Koran.
I am not too conversant with the works of the Dark One, but I wonder if someone who is could tell me of some other things that the Devil has secretly inspired?
HT [ 10. March 2003, 01:39: Message edited by: Erin ]
Posts: 6735 | From: Gin Lane | Registered: May 2001
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Karl: Liberal Backslider
Shipmate
# 76
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Posted
The Genesis Flood - allegedly by Henry Morris.
-------------------- Might as well ask the bloody cat.
Posts: 17938 | From: Chesterfield | Registered: May 2001
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Nightlamp
Shipmate
# 266
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Posted
cats being used as house hold pets
-------------------- I don't know what you are talking about so it couldn't have been that important- Nightlamp
Posts: 8442 | From: Midlands | Registered: May 2001
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Ariel
Shipmate
# 58
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Posted
Wrong. He's too busy giving the Labour Party ideas.
Posts: 25445 | Registered: May 2001
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Hooker's Trick
Admin Emeritus and Guardian of the Gin
# 89
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Posted
I thought Tony Blair was Satan until I found out the Dark Prince wrote the Koran. Tony doesn't write nearly well enough.
Posts: 6735 | From: Gin Lane | Registered: May 2001
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Ariel
Shipmate
# 58
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Posted
It is a reasonably well kept secret that Tony cannot actually write at all. It is all done for him by a variety of hellions of the lower orders, which is why the quality varies.
Posts: 25445 | Registered: May 2001
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mother hubbard
Shipmate
# 640
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Posted
personally, i think he works for the police, in the speeding ticket department.
-------------------- you realise, of course, that now i;ve posted on youir thread, it will automatically sink without a trace?
Posts: 293 | From: essex | Registered: Jun 2001
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Spike
Mostly Harmless
# 36
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Posted
Sorry but your all wrong. He writes all those letters I get from the bank.
-------------------- "May you get to heaven before the devil knows you're dead" - Irish blessing
Posts: 12860 | From: The Valley of Crocuses | Registered: May 2001
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Siegfried
Ship's ferret
# 29
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Posted
Now, that's a nice link to post over on the "It's the end of the world" thread in Urban Myths!
-------------------- Siegfried Life is just a bowl of cherries!
Posts: 5592 | From: Tallahassee, FL USA | Registered: May 2001
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QLib
Bad Example
# 43
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Posted
I think Satan inspired religion, to turn people off |God.
-------------------- Tradition is the handing down of the flame, not the worship of the ashes Gustav Mahler.
Posts: 8913 | From: Page 28 | Registered: May 2001
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chukovsky
Ship's toddler
# 116
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Posted
He must be very busy because he spends all day distracting me with the Ship and other assorted internet non-work things, so I don't get any work done, then he plies me with drink all evening.
-------------------- This space left intentionally blank. Do not write on both sides of the paper at once.
Posts: 6842 | From: somewhere else | Registered: May 2001
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Hull Hound
Shipmate
# 2140
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Posted
Just look at our own Gadgets for God. Also Enron directors, Railtrack PLC, Not sure about Tony Blair but try Lionel Blair. Surely Roy Orbison is the 'Dark One'Roy Orbison Speaking of Liberal Democrats, I once spent an evening in East Ham Liberal club with just the barman and A.N. Other, Roy Orbison was all that was played, ahhhhhhh. Did I mention I didn't like Roy?
-------------------- ahhh ... Bisto!
Posts: 1167 | From: Hull | Registered: Jan 2002
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Nicolemr
Shipmate
# 28
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Posted
i am given to understand that there are certain christians who sincerly and truly believe that bill clinton was literally a servent of satan.
-------------------- On pilgrimage in the endless realms of Cyberia, currently traveling by ship. Now with live journal!
Posts: 11803 | From: New York City "The City Carries On" | Registered: May 2001
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John Donne
Renaissance Man
# 220
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Posted
Satan also visits at night, stealing elastin and drawing wrinkles in the corners of one's eyes. And he occasionally sprinkles 'flu germs.
Posts: 13667 | From: Perth, W.A. | Registered: May 2001
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Gill
Shipmate
# 102
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Posted
I'm amazed that none of you have put what is obvious to at least one American Christian I met in france - SATAN is SANTA. Hence his appropriation of the Christmas Festival.
-------------------- Still hanging in there...
Posts: 1828 | From: not drowning but waving... | Registered: May 2001
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Campbellite
Ut unum sint
# 1202
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Posted
Now that you mention it, they both do wear red...
-------------------- I upped mine. Up yours. Suffering for Jesus since 1966. WTFWED?
Posts: 12001 | From: between keyboard and chair | Registered: Aug 2001
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QLib
Bad Example
# 43
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Posted
Campbellite - dig the sig.
-------------------- Tradition is the handing down of the flame, not the worship of the ashes Gustav Mahler.
Posts: 8913 | From: Page 28 | Registered: May 2001
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Annabel_Lee
Apprentice
# 2175
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Posted
"The Left Behind" The movie.
Posts: 3 | From: California | Registered: Jan 2002
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hermit
Shipmate
# 1803
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Posted
There is no doubt that Satan has inspired the development of those cheap plastic zippers that jam up so easily, especially the ones on tents that trap you inside just when you develop urgent diarrhea.The sacred literature of Islam is a fount of useful information concerning the Evil One. Sahih Muslim, Chapter 6: Book 004, Number 0753: AbuHuraira reported the Messenger of Allah (may peace be upon him) as saying: When Satan hears the call to prayer, he turns back and breaks the wind (farts) so as not to bear the call being made, but when the call is finished he turns round and distracts (the minds of those who pray), and when he bears the Iqama he again runs away so as not to hear its voice and when it subsides, he comes back and distracts (the minds of those who stand for prayer). Satan lives in the nose over night. He can be flushed out if you snort water up and then out the nose. (Bukhari vol. IV, no. 516; Muslim vol. I, no. 462)
-------------------- "You called out loud and shattered my deafness. You were radiant and resplendent, you put to flight my blindness... You touched me, and I am set on fire to attain that peace which was yours." Confessions, St Augustine
Posts: 812 | From: Seattle | Registered: Nov 2001
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jlg
What is this place? Why am I here?
# 98
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Posted
<sigh> In my extremely humble opinion (which since we're in hell means don't bother arguing with me because there is no way you can change my mind) Satan is alive and well and using born-again Christians to remind us of his presence in the world. <sigh>
Posts: 17391 | From: Just a Town, New Hampshire, USA | Registered: May 2001
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Nicolemr
Shipmate
# 28
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Posted
well theres something to be said for the position that satan inspired the anti-harry potter people... discredit a really superior set of books, and make christians look like blooming idiots at the same time
-------------------- On pilgrimage in the endless realms of Cyberia, currently traveling by ship. Now with live journal!
Posts: 11803 | From: New York City "The City Carries On" | Registered: May 2001
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simon 2
Shipmate
# 1524
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Posted
Many children were lead astray by the amazing street skating of Natas(???) Kaupas. What more proof do you need that it is a rebelious and wrong past time.Herbal medicine, sex, role play games, heavy metal, punk, tattoos, body piercing, dyed hair, denim jeans, communism, science, police academy films, women with short hair, the NIV, RSV, GNV, the message and ugly people.
-------------------- sorry for my spelling and bad gramma
Posts: 495 | From: in a forest | Registered: Oct 2001
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SteveWal
Shipmate
# 307
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Posted
TV programmes about Aleister Crowley that actually take the Great Deluded Beast seriously rather than laugh at him (preferably maniacally) and expose him as a sad sex adict who liked dressing up in capes, are obviously authored by the Devil as a way of attracting Marilyn Manson fans to dress up in capes and look even stupider.
-------------------- If they give you lined paper to write on, write across the lines. (Russian anarchist saying)
Posts: 208 | From: Manchester | Registered: May 2001
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Nicolemr
Shipmate
# 28
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Posted
i once read an article that seriously (as opposed to the joke versions) claimed barney the dinosaur was inspired by satan. one example... in the camping episode, the children are told by barney, if they get lost in the woods to hug a tree. (this is pretty standard advice, actually, the idea being, hugging a tree keeps the child from wandering farther away, and making it easier for searchers to find) however, to the author of this article, "tree-hugging" ment barney was influenced by rabid eco-nuts, and we all know that they are all new-age followers, and new age beliefs are all tools of satan. i'm serious, i really read this and it wasn't a joke.and what about the teletubbies? that whole "tinky-wink (or whatever his name is) is gay" thing... i read stuff then that claimed the teletubbies were part of a secular humanist plot to destroy the fabric of family life.
-------------------- On pilgrimage in the endless realms of Cyberia, currently traveling by ship. Now with live journal!
Posts: 11803 | From: New York City "The City Carries On" | Registered: May 2001
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Callan
Shipmate
# 525
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Posted
Originally posted by Hope: quote: My Little Pony. On some very interesting grounds (something to do with "her" being a "Foul Temptress of Lust").
This has just displaced "You must read all the Bible or you'll suffer social death when you're introduced to the Prophet Habbakuk in the afterlife" as my favourite awful warning. My thanks to CorgiGreta for the elegant precis of Satan's literary oeuvre to date. Does anyone know why Satan's literary agents invariably credit him with the NIV but never (or rarely) the NEB or the NRSV. [Still trying to get my head round the idea of some fundamentalist discovering he's kinky for "My Little Pony".]
-------------------- How easy it would be to live in England, if only one did not love her. - G.K. Chesterton
Posts: 9757 | From: Citizen of the World | Registered: Jun 2001
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Poppy
Ship's dancing cat
# 2000
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Posted
Forget Teletubbies and Barney, the true spawn of Satan are the Pokemon. The fights in my house over trading cards have to be seen to be believed.
-------------------- At the still point of the turning world - there the dance is...
Posts: 1406 | From: mostly on the edge | Registered: Dec 2001
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