Source: (consider it)
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Thread: Getting Hitched 2015
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Scots lass
Shipmate
# 2699
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Posted
I haven't found a weddings thread for this year, so thought I'd start one - my very lovely boyfriend is now my very lovely fiancé instead and we're getting married in October. The provisional date is actually Halloween, suggestions of a themed wedding have so far gone like this: Me: We could have costumes! Him: Ok, how about you come dressed as a bride and I come dressed as a groom?
He is more serious-minded than I am. I'm not sure I would really do it, but it could be fun.
Anyone else? Or any tips for wedding planning? (NB, I am familiar with the Crappy Choruses etc thread and none of the horrors feature in our possibles list, especially not that awful one which appears to confuse Jesus with Michael Flatley)
Posts: 863 | From: the diaspora | Registered: Apr 2002
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Pigwidgeon
Ship's Owl
# 10192
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Posted
Congratulations and best wishes, Scots lass and lovely fiancé!
-------------------- "...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe." ~Tortuf
Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005
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Piglet
Islander
# 11803
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Posted
Congratulations, Scots lass and Chap!
-------------------- I may not be on an island any more, but I'm still an islander. alto n a soprano who can read music
Posts: 20272 | From: Fredericton, NB, on a rather larger piece of rock | Registered: Sep 2006
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Welease Woderwick
Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424
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Posted
Congrats from over here, too.
How about a Rocky Horror wedding with you two sensibly dressed as Brad and Janet and the crowd dressed as the other characters. Invite Pete over to play Dr von Scott - I'm sure he'd look splendid in Fishnets!
-------------------- I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way. Fancy a break in South India? Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?
Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005
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Huia
Shipmate
# 3473
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Posted
Congratulations to you and your partner Scots Lass.
I love his answer to your suggestion.
-------------------- Charity gives food from the table, Justice gives a place at the table.
Posts: 10382 | From: Te Wai Pounamu | Registered: Oct 2002
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MrsBeaky
Shipmate
# 17663
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Posted
Congratulations, Scots lass!
Number 3 of our four daughters is getting married this October too. It's a bit of a logistical nightmare as we are here in Kenya and her eldest sister, husband and children are in NZ. Somehow we will all make it back to the UK and it will all come together......
All the best with your planning and preparation, hope it's fun!
-------------------- "It is better to be kind than right."
http://davidandlizacooke.wordpress.com
Posts: 693 | From: UK/ Kenya | Registered: Apr 2013
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Piglet
Islander
# 11803
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Posted
quote: Originally posted by Huia: ... I love his answer to your suggestion.
[tangent] When we lived in Orkney, a couple of my (not-entirely-sane) colleagues decided they would put on a small-scale version of Up Helly Aa, complete with singing procession* and burning long-boat. Guests were invited to dress as Vikings; D., being a bit of a party-pooper, came in a jacket and tie and said he was coming as a Viking bank manager ... [/tangent]
* Nobody actually knew the Up Helly Aa song, so (as one of the organisers came from Yorkshire) we sang On Ilkley Moor instead. [ 25. February 2015, 13:39: Message edited by: Piglet ]
-------------------- I may not be on an island any more, but I'm still an islander. alto n a soprano who can read music
Posts: 20272 | From: Fredericton, NB, on a rather larger piece of rock | Registered: Sep 2006
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la vie en rouge
Parisienne
# 10688
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Posted
Yay!!
Two months today for me, and I don’t know whether to go or I think everything’s mostly under control.
We gave ourselves ten months to get everything ready, and it’s really not too long, especially because we’re organising everything from a distance. I know there are people who do everything in three months, but that sound crazy stressful to me.
Our main snags had to do with clothes. For example, my mother is fulfilling one of her life’s ambitions and saving me a lot of wonga by making my dress (she says it should be finished this week ). When we made a sample before starting on the final dress we discovered it really, really didn’t fit – the pattern is from the 1950s, in the days of very squeezy undergarments before women’s lib and the waist was about 6 inches in circumference. We’ve been able to use it, but it needed some very major, extremely time-consuming adjustment (hurrah for best friend en rouge, who is a professional pattern cutter!!). Equally, fiancé en rouge’s suit is currently running about two months late. Because we had time, neither of these have been major catastrophes, but if we’d been on a three-months timescale, it would have been a nightmare. Give yourself enough time for stuff to go wrong.
Making a budget and sticking to it is boring but extremely necessary. All the advice that I have read says that starting out married life by getting into debt is a mahoosively bad idea. Also plan for everything to be more expensive than you thought it would be (that way, if you’re wrong, it’s a nice surprise). Figure out what you really want and are prepared to spend money on, and also the stuff that you don’t care about all that much even if everyone says you’re “supposed” to have it. Be yourself. Have a good time. Don’t try to make it perfect because it won’t be. But it will be awesome.
-------------------- Rent my holiday home in the South of France
Posts: 3696 | Registered: Nov 2005
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Jane R
Shipmate
# 331
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Posted
Congratulations!
I have two pieces of advice:
1. Wear comfortable shoes. You will be on your feet for quite a long time.
2. If you are having a traditional Scottish wedding with ceilidh, check that you can do the Eightsome Reel and the Gay Gordons in your wedding dress (and shoes). Unless of course you are planning to get changed before the dancing starts: I know of one bride who made a wedding dress with a built-in ripcord. After the wedding breakfast she pulled the cord, and hey presto! her full-length wedding dress became knee-length, perfect for dancing in.
Actually, three pieces of advice:
3. If anything goes wrong on the big day, console yourself with the thought that it will make a great story to tell your grandchildren (or someone else's grandchildren, if you don't have any). [ 25. February 2015, 15:52: Message edited by: Jane R ]
Posts: 3958 | From: Jorvik | Registered: May 2001
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Sioni Sais
Shipmate
# 5713
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Posted
My congratulations to you too!
quote: Originally posted by Jane R: 3. If anything goes wrong on the big day, console yourself with the thought that it will make a great story to tell your grandchildren (or someone else's grandchildren, if you don't have any).
Sioni's Law of Weddings states that "Even in the best planned wedding, something will not go to plan". Mine was no exception.
Naturally, I hope nothing major goes awry, but do remember that it is a wedding, not Swan Lake (for which split-second timing and perfection in execution is required). Most of all, people will remember you.
-------------------- "He isn't Doctor Who, he's The Doctor"
(Paul Sinha, BBC)
Posts: 24276 | From: Newport, Wales | Registered: Apr 2004
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SvitlanaV2
Shipmate
# 16967
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Posted
quote: Originally posted by Scots lass: (NB, I am familiar with the Crappy Choruses etc thread and none of the horrors feature in our possibles list, especially not that awful one which appears to confuse Jesus with Michael Flatley)
But isn't it a good idea to choose the obvious (and possibly crappy) hymns simply because your non-churchgoing guests might actually know them?
Posts: 6668 | From: UK | Registered: Feb 2012
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Pigwidgeon
Ship's Owl
# 10192
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Posted
quote: Originally posted by SvitlanaV2: But isn't it a good idea to choose the obvious (and possibly crappy) hymns simply because your non-churchgoing guests might actually know them?
NO!
(Just my humble opinion...)
-------------------- "...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe." ~Tortuf
Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005
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Ariston
Insane Unicorn
# 10894
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Posted
quote: Originally posted by SvitlanaV2: quote: Originally posted by Scots lass: (NB, I am familiar with the Crappy Choruses etc thread and none of the horrors feature in our possibles list, especially not that awful one which appears to confuse Jesus with Michael Flatley)
But isn't it a good idea to choose the obvious (and possibly crappy) hymns simply because your non-churchgoing guests might actually know them?
1. Churchgoing friends had to learn the hymns somewhere, and what counts as an Old Warhorse in one place and tradition is obscure in another. Lord of the Dance is programmed about as often as Have Courage, My Boy, to Say No over here (IME, YMMV, ETC)—which is to say, maybe once every couple years. Have a few plants in the audience who know the hymn, and by the third verse, everyone else will as well.
2. For those of you about to gain a whole new family, I would like to remind you that the Difficult Relatives Hell thread is always open.
-------------------- “Therefore, let it be explained that nowhere are the proprieties quite so strictly enforced as in men’s colleges that invite young women guests, especially over-night visitors in the fraternity houses.” Emily Post, 1937.
Posts: 6849 | From: The People's Republic of Balcones | Registered: Jan 2006
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Scots lass
Shipmate
# 2699
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Posted
quote: Originally posted by SvitlanaV2: quote: Originally posted by Scots lass: (NB, I am familiar with the Crappy Choruses etc thread and none of the horrors feature in our possibles list, especially not that awful one which appears to confuse Jesus with Michael Flatley)
But isn't it a good idea to choose the obvious (and possibly crappy) hymns simply because your non-churchgoing guests might actually know them?
Lots of our mutual friends are church-goers, and we loathe some of the obvious ones that we did in primary school. I know people pick them because they're familiar, but I'd rather our guests sang something I like - they're not going to be terribly obscure!
Thank you for all the congratulations and suggestions! (possibly the only time I might use that)
Jane R mentioned shoes - I have survived an incredibly fast Strip the Willow whilst wearing 3 or 4" stilettos, so as long as they're reasonably comfy I should be fine! (Yes, comfortable heels are possible for me) When I start dress shopping I'll remember to make sure I can dance in that too!
I love the sound of la vie en rouge's 1950s dress - no-one I know sews well enough to do that for me, but there are some shops which do that sort of thing which is high on my list to visit! Also very tempted by the Up Helly Aa idea...
Posts: 863 | From: the diaspora | Registered: Apr 2002
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L'organist
Shipmate
# 17338
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Posted
Congratulations.
Service suggestions: choose the version of words you're most comfortable with. As for hymns, since you have friends who're churchgoers you should have a fairly wide selection from which to choose.
In and out music : if in doubt, ask the organist.
The day itself: don't throw money at it because your friends will be happy with a cup of tea and the accompanying bun (or slice of cake) will be a bonus.
Above all, don't get hung up on the idea of perfection, just make it the day you'll be happy with and all will be well.
-------------------- Rara temporum felicitate ubi sentire quae velis et quae sentias dicere licet
Posts: 4950 | From: somewhere in England... | Registered: Sep 2012
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SvitlanaV2
Shipmate
# 16967
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Posted
Scots lass
If many of your friends are familiar with church music then you can choose from a far wider range of hymns. You're very fortunate.
Good luck with everything! [ 25. February 2015, 18:34: Message edited by: SvitlanaV2 ]
Posts: 6668 | From: UK | Registered: Feb 2012
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Firenze
Ordinary decent pagan
# 619
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Posted
quote: Originally posted by Scots lass: I love the sound of la vie en rouge's 1950s dress - no-one I know sews well enough to do that for me, but there are some shops which do that sort of thing which is high on my list to visit! Also very tempted by the Up Helly Aa idea...
Like the idea of a Viking ship burial costumed in Dior's New Look. Horned helmets, nipped waists, full skirts and just the dinkiest of double-headed axes.
Posts: 17302 | From: Edinburgh | Registered: Jun 2001
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Jane R
Shipmate
# 331
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Posted
Not for many years to come, I hope
If you can do Strip the Willow in 3-inch heels you are a better woman than I am... I always wear flat shoes for dancing. I mentioned shoes because I have vivid memories of dancing the Gay Gordons in the whole outfit - heels, wedding dress, veil - and nearly putting someone's eye out with the veil.
I had checked in advance that the shoes were suitable for dancing in, by dancing round the shop in them. It's the only time I managed to embarrass my mum so much she pretended she wasn't with me [ 26. February 2015, 08:00: Message edited by: Jane R ]
Posts: 3958 | From: Jorvik | Registered: May 2001
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Lamb Chopped
Ship's kebab
# 5528
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Posted
Congratulations!
Expect three things to go wrong on your wedding day, and laugh at them. They will become the stories you tell for the next fifty years. (Mine: couldn't find bra, was married without it; unknown guest in Bermuda shorts showed up and wandered through the pictures; stepfather taped World Wide Wrestling over wedding video by mistake)
Expect to have a huge fight with your fiancé during the pre-wedding period. This happens so often that when we were seeing a new couple through premarital counseling and wedding plans, we had it on a mental checklist for them ("has the fight happened yet?") and we got worried if no fight had broken out. (I think that happened ONCE, and we took it as a bad, bad sign.)
Look to the mundane, practical things. E.g. have someone save you a plate of food if you are in a culture where you spend the whole reception moving from table to table greeting everyone! Look at the calendar and see if you'll be on your period during your honeymoon . Plan for your comfort after wedding is over--I have a relative who brought his exhausted bride home to sleep in his shared studio apartment (was it on the floor or the couch? can't remember now). Mr. Clueless.
-------------------- Er, this is what I've been up to (book). Oh, that you would rend the heavens and come down!
Posts: 20059 | From: off in left field somewhere | Registered: Feb 2004
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Caissa
Shipmate
# 16710
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Posted
We didn't have a pre-wedding fight. Probably because I let Ms. C. do most of the planning especially since her father was footing the bill. I just asked her to tell me where to be and what to do. I find that's a good credo as a husband as well. We are coming up on 19 years in May.
Posts: 972 | From: Saint John, N.B. | Registered: Oct 2011
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North East Quine
Curious beastie
# 13049
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Posted
Congratulations, Scots Lass!
No pre-wedding fight here - I was too busy fighting with my mother.
Posts: 6414 | From: North East Scotland | Registered: Oct 2007
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la vie en rouge
Parisienne
# 10688
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Posted
My frock (the making of which I gather has shortened mother en rouge’s life by several years) is based on this one. It is in white lace (purchased for the princely sum of £3/metre) with a red sash. Not being floor length, I shall be showing of my red shoes (oh yes!) gloriously. All in all between the fabric and the pattern, I think the dress has cost about £80. Yay for my mother . I definitely wanted a vintage style one because it’s just more me than the strapless affairs that are everywhere at the minute. I kind of feel like it’s one day when you really ought to turn up looking like yourself.
If you don’t have a dressmaker in the vicinity, you could always go for an actual vintage one. I think I would have gone down this route had I not had a handy mother close by with her sewing machine. Some of these (shameless wedding dress porn), for example, are fabulous. They’re not cheap, but I think it’s still cheaper than buying a new dress of similar quality. The viability of this approach depends a lot on the size, of course (see my earlier problem with teeny-tiny miniscule waists).
On the subject of songs, we have the added complication that our guests speak two different languages. There is an old-fashioned hymn (All My Hope on God is Founded) and the English-speaking guests have been asked to Sing Loud™. I think some of the French people are going to be a bit flummoxed by it (there are other songs in French).
-------------------- Rent my holiday home in the South of France
Posts: 3696 | Registered: Nov 2005
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Scots lass
Shipmate
# 2699
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Posted
That dress looks gorgeous! And I am now shamelessly ogling the dress porn. Am terribly tempted by these guys but not sure my mum would like it.
Like NEQ, I appear to be disagreeing with my mum more than my fiancé - although it's early days and he and I may yet have a fight about it all!
Posts: 863 | From: the diaspora | Registered: Apr 2002
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Curiosity killed ...
Ship's Mug
# 11770
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Posted
For my cousin's wedding (I was sharing a flat with him at the time), I ended up good friends with his wife to be and went dress shopping with her in vintage shops. She bought a 20s dress, partly to go with the vintage Art Deco engagement ring, but partly because it suited her - she's tiny - even smaller than me. I still lech over that ring.
As well as moving out to make room for the fiancée, I made (I can't believe I did it now) the bridesmaids' dresses as my wedding present.
-------------------- Mugs - Keep the Ship afloat
Posts: 13794 | From: outiside the outer ring road | Registered: Aug 2006
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Sarasa
Shipmate
# 12271
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Posted
Congratulations Scots Lass. I've started ogling those dresses too and I'm not remotely thinking about getting married. When we got married we'd been together for years and had a ten year old son, so everything was in theory going to be low key. We decided in the February and got married in the May. Though not exactly an enormous wedding I did end up in a proper frock (off the peg from Monsoon) and a tiara. If we'd waited any longer I think the wedding would have got bigger and bigger. As to rows with my mother. She was 200 miles away at the time, which proably saved my sanity. She did think my very short hairstyle wasn't suitable and suggested I have extentions. Now of course she tells me I should have my hair 'cut in that nice short style again'. Basically you can't win with mothers. [ 27. February 2015, 08:12: Message edited by: Sarasa ]
Posts: 2035 | From: London | Registered: Jan 2007
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L'organist
Shipmate
# 17338
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Posted
My friend Philip made wedding dresses for all three of his daughters.
An aeronautical engineer, he got into sewing when his wife got stuck making loose covers when they were first married. He reasoned that it was just DIY using 'soft' components, had a go and (after tweaking the pattern) produced the covers - which were amazing.
From there he moved to dressmaking and was a dab hand, making his own patterns, etc. I'm not sure of the technical wizardry behind it all, but certainly the dress for the youngest daughter, in particular, was a triumph - and he made dresses for the 6 bridesmaids and his wife as well!
-------------------- Rara temporum felicitate ubi sentire quae velis et quae sentias dicere licet
Posts: 4950 | From: somewhere in England... | Registered: Sep 2012
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Zacchaeus
Shipmate
# 14454
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Posted
congratualtions - and those 50's dresses look amazing - and never mind you mum (well not too much) it's your dress and your day....
Posts: 1905 | From: the back of beyond | Registered: Jan 2009
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Heavenly Anarchist
Shipmate
# 13313
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Posted
Congratulations! Have fun finding the dress of your dreams quote: Originally posted by L'organist: My friend Philip made wedding dresses for all three of his daughters.
An aeronautical engineer, he got into sewing when his wife got stuck making loose covers when they were first married. He reasoned that it was just DIY using 'soft' components, had a go and (after tweaking the pattern) produced the covers - which were amazing.
From there he moved to dressmaking and was a dab hand, making his own patterns, etc. I'm not sure of the technical wizardry behind it all, but certainly the dress for the youngest daughter, in particular, was a triumph - and he made dresses for the 6 bridesmaids and his wife as well!
My husband is also an engineer and is an excellent dressmaker. Our wedding was Georgian themed and he made his own period waistcoat, trousers and jabot and wore them with a secondhand tailcoat. My bridemaid made my regency dress as I didn't sew in those days but now I make clothes for re-creations so it wouldn't be a problem for me either. I'd say don't be afraid you wear something different, we caught the train from Liverpool Street (we got married in Bishopsgate) in full regency gear to go to our honeymoon cottage. People generously let us jump the taxi rank at the other end!
-------------------- 'I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.' Douglas Adams Dog Activity Monitor My shop
Posts: 2831 | From: Trumpington | Registered: Jan 2008
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la vie en rouge
Parisienne
# 10688
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Posted
Alternatively if you’re after a bit of light relief, type some variation of “world’s ugliest wedding dresses” into Google and marvel at some of the things people have thought they looked good in...
It might also be good for a bit of subterfuge on your Mum: “I was thinking about this one*… oh you don’t like it? Well how about this one (shows cute 50s dress) instead?”
*this actually isn’t the worst offender that Google provides but it is kind of hilarious. I mean who on earth could this net curtain confection be flattering to??
-------------------- Rent my holiday home in the South of France
Posts: 3696 | Registered: Nov 2005
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Piglet
Islander
# 11803
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Posted
I got my mum to make my wedding dress because, as I told her, she'd made all the best-fitting clothes I'd ever had. She was apprehensive at first (she never admitted to being half as good at things as she was), but she made a lovely job of it, and IIRC the total cost including lots of little strings of pearly things marking the seams (it was 1988 - that's my excuse) came to about £60. The shoes, which I sent away for, added another £60 or so, as I had them dyed to match the ivory colour of the dress, but even by the standards of the time, it wasn't an expensive outfit.
A few years later, a friend spent about three times that on a "mother-of-the-bride" hat ...
-------------------- I may not be on an island any more, but I'm still an islander. alto n a soprano who can read music
Posts: 20272 | From: Fredericton, NB, on a rather larger piece of rock | Registered: Sep 2006
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Jack the Lass
Ship's airhead
# 3415
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Posted
Congratulations, Scots Lass and fiance!
We had about a year between engagement and wedding, but very conveniently I had my PhD fieldwork to do so I left the country for 6 months, until just under 3 months to go. Actually I definitely recommend leaving the country as a strategy to avoid Bridezilla/mumzilla/etc stress. We had sorted the important things (church, vicar, hotel, dress) plus a couple of less important things (such as paying a £10 deposit for the flowers) before I went, and everything else we just did ourselves. I think it really helped that we didn't have any kind of theme (colour or otherwise), so going shopping with my bridesmaid was easy as we just looked for a dress which suited her, and weren't hamstrung by having to find something in that exact shade of whatever colour. We didn't bother with a posh car (originally I was going to be driven to the church by a friend who had a half-decent car, but he was ill and in hospital so couldn't come, so I ended up being driven by my father-in-law instead), and we did the invitations and order of service booklets ourselves (got a picture put onto some Moo cards and stuck them on a bit of card. Sorted). And we put some music on an mp3 player and got our DJ friend to bring his amp, and just attached the two together for music afterwards.
I did buy a dress from a wedding dress shop (which was fun, but also a bit scary for someone as ungirly as me), so that wasn't as cheap as it could have been, but I got all my accessories elsewhere which helped. Jacket from New Look, and pump shoes from a shop which seemed to me to be the shoeshop equivalent of Claire's Accessories (I was the oldest person in there by decades!). A lovely friend (and shipmate) made my jewellery as her wedding gift. People are so very generous (and talented!), and weddings often bring out the generosity and talent in bucketloads.
One thing we did which I'm really glad about was have my laptop available at the reception, with a card reader attached. People could then download the photos they'd taken that day, and we were able to take them with us on honeymoon rather than having to wait several weeks for the official photos. I suppose it's the equivalent of the disposable cameras which were all the rage at every wedding I went to in the 1990s.
-------------------- "My body is a temple - it's big and doesn't move." (Jo Brand) wiblog blipfoto blog
Posts: 5767 | From: the land of the deep-fried Mars Bar | Registered: Oct 2002
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North East Quine
Curious beastie
# 13049
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Posted
The thing I got wrong at my wedding was not realising how little time I'd have to speak to people. We got married early afternoon, and left at about 11pm, so we had about 10 hours, but more time than I'd appreciated was used up by e.g. photos and the sit-down meal. Then, once I was free to mingle, I kept getting asked up to dance. End result was that there were guests that I didn't speak to at all, which I regretted. I wish I'd had a plan, or a check list, or something, rather than just being swept along.
Posts: 6414 | From: North East Scotland | Registered: Oct 2007
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The Kat in the Hat
Shipmate
# 2557
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Posted
I've often thought about have a 2nd wedding (to the same person, she added hastily) to do all the things that got forgotten about - like talking to everyone!
-------------------- Less is more ...
Posts: 485 | Registered: Mar 2002
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Welease Woderwick
Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424
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Posted
There is a temple town in Tamil Nadu where the temple specialises in second weddings - you go along with wife, kids and grandkids, etc. and renew your wedding vows - it's a great idea and everyone we met there was having so much fun! Grandkids playing tricks on grandparents and all - fabulous!
-------------------- I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way. Fancy a break in South India? Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?
Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005
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Tukai
Shipmate
# 12960
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Posted
A thought for La Vie en Rouge about organising a wedding from afar, based on the experience of my daughter, who is a very organised person and savvy online. Allow yourself a week or so at the town where the wedding will take place. This allows you to check that everything really is OK, not just that the supplier of whatever says it is. She used this time to liase with key players, and even to bake the cake (at the home of one of the bridesmaid's parents! - said bridesmaid had just flown in from another continent.)
That way, you will be feeling less harassed and enjoy your wedding more. But above all remember that what really counts in your life will be the marriage (that lasts for years) rather than the ceremony (that lasts for hours) that kicks it off. Good luck with both of those phases!
-------------------- A government that panders to the worst instincts of its people degrades the whole country for years to come.
Posts: 594 | From: Oz | Registered: Sep 2007
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Little Miss Methodist
Ship's Diplomat
# 1000
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Posted
I got married in October last year and tried very hard to have as low key / inexpensive a wedding as possible.
Mr Methodist isn't religious so we had a registry office ceremony with nice secular readings and it was lovely. I honestly loved it and didn't feel that God wasn't there because it wasn't in a church - of course God is there...
We were determined that it shouldn't be too fussy, so invited only 54 people, had the reception in the private function room of a pub, had a buffet only and dj'd all the music ourselves via ipod. We did minimal speaches, the only flowers were the paper bouquet my sister made me, my Dad drove me to the ceremony in his car we made little favours ourselves and my other sister made our wedding cake. I loved everything about it, from the hand made feel to the intimacy, to the "normalcy" of everything. I honestly can't think of anything about the day that I would change.
One of the most important things for me was to make my wedding dress. Even as a little girl I always said I didn't care about the rest of the day as long as I had a lovely dress! I wanted something I could wear again and didn't want white, so my dress was green! It was based on a vintage pattern that I adapted and made out of silk that I scoured London for, as well as a spotty overlay that I ordered from china via etsy that was brilliant value. I think it cost around £150 all in to make. Have a gratuitous photo. I'm about to stab the book cake in that picture (coincidentally right through Julius Caesar). I made my husbands tie and waistcoat to match, and also knitted the socks he's wearing. The sash around my waist was my 'something old' and was made from my mothers wedding dress. You can't tell in the picture but the dress is tea length, so I wore fabulous shoes too...
I think the best advice I can give about weddings is to do it your way and make it authentic to you. We totally did that and i'm so pleased that we did. We also didn't fuss about making things 'absolutely perfect'. I caught myself trying to make everything the absolute best it could be for the day and gave myself a stern talking to and stopped - I never wear anything on my nails so I don't need a fussy manicure; my normal bra fits perfectly under my dress so I do not need special 'bridal lingerie'; i'm happy doing my makeup and will feel more 'me' so I don't want someone expensive doing that for me etc etc. The relief of not trying to push everything to be perfect but instead just trying to make the most of the day and enjoy it was huge.
Good luck to anyone getting married soon! Don't stress, it's just one day and it will be lovely because you are marrying the person you love surrounded by people you love!
-------------------- Tell me where you learned the magic, The spell you used the day you made me fall....
Posts: 1628 | From: Caretaker of the Overlook Hotel | Registered: Apr 2003
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Baptist Trainfan
Shipmate
# 15128
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Posted
quote: Originally posted by Scots lass: The provisional date is actually Halloween, suggestions of a themed wedding have so far gone like this: Me: We could have costumes! Him: Ok, how about you come dressed as a bride and I come dressed as a groom?
What about a groom's suit in white and a wedding dress in black ...?
Posts: 9750 | From: The other side of the Severn | Registered: Sep 2009
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Firenze
Ordinary decent pagan
# 619
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Posted
quote: Originally posted by Baptist Trainfan: a wedding dress in black ...?
Don't say that, or LVER will be down on you like une tonne de briques.
Posts: 17302 | From: Edinburgh | Registered: Jun 2001
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Firenze
Ordinary decent pagan
# 619
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Posted
I thought le peu de français might have pointed to a Shipmate who has posted on this thread...
Posts: 17302 | From: Edinburgh | Registered: Jun 2001
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Lucia
Looking for light
# 15201
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Posted
I think she means shipmate La Vie en Rouge. I remember a rather heated thread on the subject of black dresses being worn to weddings, or rather in particular to her wedding... [ 02. March 2015, 19:49: Message edited by: Lucia ]
Posts: 1075 | From: Nigh golden stone and spires | Registered: Oct 2009
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Jack the Lass
Ship's airhead
# 3415
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Posted
Wow Little Miss Methodist, you look fabulous in those pictures! (Belated) congratulations!
-------------------- "My body is a temple - it's big and doesn't move." (Jo Brand) wiblog blipfoto blog
Posts: 5767 | From: the land of the deep-fried Mars Bar | Registered: Oct 2002
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Piglet
Islander
# 11803
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Posted
What JtL said, LMM - and aren't you clever making the dress, waistcoat etc.
-------------------- I may not be on an island any more, but I'm still an islander. alto n a soprano who can read music
Posts: 20272 | From: Fredericton, NB, on a rather larger piece of rock | Registered: Sep 2006
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Welease Woderwick
Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424
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Posted
Wot they said - FAB!!
-------------------- I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way. Fancy a break in South India? Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?
Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005
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la vie en rouge
Parisienne
# 10688
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Posted
To be fair, I’ve never said you shouldn’t wear black to your own wedding if you feel like it. Just don’t wear it to mine
My dress is finished I’m still feeling rather stressed out at the moment tho. There’s so much to do, not least a house move…
-------------------- Rent my holiday home in the South of France
Posts: 3696 | Registered: Nov 2005
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Ariel
Shipmate
# 58
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Posted
"Married in black Wish yourself back."
Looks horrible as a wedding dress, unless you're going for some kind of Gothic theme.
Posts: 25445 | Registered: May 2001
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