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» Ship of Fools   » Ship's Locker   » Limbo   » Heaven: Reality Internet presents "SMILIE SISTER" (Page 1)

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Source: (consider it) Thread: Heaven: Reality Internet presents "SMILIE SISTER"
clare
Contributing Editor
# 17

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Join in Smilie Sister, Ship-of-Fools answer to reality TV. We have 8 willing participants who will spend the next couple of weeks locked in an undisclosed location battling it out to be the Smilie Sister winner!!!! Their survival is in your hands. Every other day there will be a vote with one smilie being eliminated from the contest.

The competition will proceed like this:

Day one, three, five, seven etc. Action Days. The smilies will be given a task to complete during the day. As participants in the thread you can write the dialogue between the participants, and hopefully we'll get some key characters emerging, possibly some personality clashes, maybe even a few romantic moments. Who knows?!

Days two, four, six, eight, etc. Voting days. Here the thread will freeze frame the drama as everyone gets a chance to vote which smilie is to be ejected from the contest. After the twenty four hours of voting is up (one vote per shipmate), the votes will be counted and one smilie will be asked to leave. Voters will also be asked to suggest a task for the next days activities. The drama will continue on day three.

The days will run from 00.00 hours as shown on the thread dates. Anyone may count up votes cast at the end of the voting periods, declare the smilie to be ejected and set the next days task. It is also permissible to submit media commentary on the antics in Smilie Sister, or to conduct interviews (with ejected smilies only).

Note: when writing smilie dialogue you have a limit of 8 smilies per post.

The 8 smilies will start their sojourn in under constant public scrutiny today.

Introducing the contestants:
[Big Grin] [Eek!] [Cool] [Mad] [Confused] [Wink] [Frown] [Razz]

Important: these are the only smilies who have been selected to appear in Smilie Sister. Do not use any of the others.

The first days task is to build a life sized norman castle.

[ 10. March 2003, 02:14: Message edited by: Erin ]

Posts: 2317 | From: edge of the peak district | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
clare
Contributing Editor
# 17

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DAY ONE

The smilies enter the Smilie Sister experience. They have never met before. They do not yet know their task for the day.

Whay hay.. this place is so coooool, ooh I'm so excited!! Fame! Fame! Fame! Look at meeeee!
hi. Good to meet you. Put it here friend. Anyone for a beer?
errmmm, I'm looking for the canned veg aisle….don't say they've moved this place around again.
This is no SUPERMARKET!!! We're talking Smilie Sister! We're talking Live Stream Internet! We're talking celebrity.
so no canned veg? I must have taken the wrong turning.
well, pull up a deckchair, you're here to stay, so we might as well get round to the juicy business of declaring intimate life experiences to the world wide media circus.
did some-one mention me? Keep it down. I've got a guilty secret that my mum doesn't know about, she'll be so shocked, I don't know how she'll face her friends at the Pony Club. Oh yes, I'm the low of the low… A Tabloid Journalist.
NO!!!


Posts: 2317 | From: edge of the peak district | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
clare
Contributing Editor
# 17

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did someone say they were a tabloid journalist? hey... my kind of people. Right, who's going to get voted off first?
not your call mate... it's the mysterios watchers who get to push the button on the ejector seat.
hey! my eagle investigating eyes have spotted an envelope and my sharp witted brain reckons this is todays task.
ok, got it. we have to build a norman castle. life sized. have we got anyone with drawbridge construction skills?
oh darling, you're soooo masterful! You can draw me to your bridge any day....
yeah, right, sure you need to wear your bikini for this sort of heavy manual labour?
i'm not so sure about the moat. how deep should it be? and can we make it with only a teaspoon in the tool shed?
who's norman?

Posts: 2317 | From: edge of the peak district | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
clare
Contributing Editor
# 17

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FLASH
HEY! how dare you take a photo of my rather exposed clevage!!!!
all in a days work babe... i need to earn my honest living..
You call expoiting young ladies an 'honest living?'
sign my hero
oh dear, i think i need to be doing something more dashing than finishing off the guttering on the north gatehouse to get noticed around here...


quote:
Dear Readers. you get the idea? feel free to join in!

Posts: 2317 | From: edge of the peak district | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Elizabeth
Shipmate
# 207

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You know, I think that special whitening toothpaste is going to do the trick as far as getting a little more camera time. Forget the cleavage.
All right, no more slacking. We've only got a few hours left on this project, and so far all we've got a two inch trench dug with a teaspoon for a moat.
Pass the sunscreen, would you? I burn so easily. Especially in those, um, delicate cleavage areas.
I'm digging as fast as I can, really. How deep does the moat have to be?
Do you have to apply it right there, right now? The camera's rolling!
I'm sure the glare from my teeth will blot out the more titillating parts.
At this rate, we'll all be voted off in the first round.
Hey, who's Norman?

--------------------
The Hunger Site is back!

Posts: 669 | From: The Place of Knee Deep Leaves | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Gill
Shipmate
# 102

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I can never remember who all the other people in here are!

I have them written down - just faxed off the list, as a matter of fact...

You won't NEED to remember the others for long... wanna piccy of my big attributes? And my teeth, of course...


Why the F*** do I get to do all the BLEEP BLEEP work round here? Off yer backside, Colgate, and start digging - or you won't have any F****** teeth left to brush...

Can she say that? (*Sobs into camera*)

(*Enters Diary Room*) Who's Norman?

OUTTA HERE! (*Scowls to camera*) The others have sent me to ask if we could have a JCB. No they haven't they're too B****** stupid to think. How long do I have to stay here?

(*pushes into shot*) ANd brickies, Dahlin' - one each. Make fer some good shots an' I've got the Headline... 'BABES BED BRICKIES IN NORMAN CONQUEST'

--------------------
Still hanging in there...


Posts: 1828 | From: not drowning but waving... | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Maddie
Ship's cartographer
# 11

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I have just about had enough of this, we are meant to be building a Norman Castle.
a castle called norman? a castle for norman?
shut up you ****** *****
Come on now everyone, we should be really nice to each other - ooh I am looking gorgeous at the moment, I'm bound to become a model when this is over.
have you seen yourself? Who would pay to have you model for them, I mean those teeth are just plain weird.
oh (more sobbing)
just chill, have a beer, forget the Norman Castle.
?

Posts: 1304 | From: East of England | Registered: Apr 2001  |  IP: Logged
Stoo

Mighty Pirate
# 254

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um... i'm getting no air time. at this rate, i'm gonna be voted off for being boring.
you are boring.
but look, i can stick my tongue out! tell me that doesn't make me a fun guy to be around!
that doesn't make you a fun guy to be around.
um... if you carry on at this rate, you'll be voted off first, mr. grumpy.
hey, guys... chill!
shut up you tree-hugging, hippy ****
hey... is that norman as in wisdom?

(not editing.. just trying to see why this thread is buggered.. nope, no suspect code here... clare)

[ 31 May 2001: Message edited by: clare ]

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Posts: 5266 | From: the director of "Bikini Traffic School" | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Elizabeth
Shipmate
# 207

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Oh, hello stranger!
Beg pardon?
I just noticed that you can stick your tongue out....how.....interesting.
Will you take those things and get on with the project? And stop smiling!
Chill, man. You know, if you wore shades the glare from her teeth wouldn't be so bad.
The spoon handle is bent.
As long as it's deep enough to toss in Lady Colgate who cares?

--------------------
The Hunger Site is back!

Posts: 669 | From: The Place of Knee Deep Leaves | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
clare
Contributing Editor
# 17

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DAY TWO - VOTING DAY

Today we freeze the action our 8 contestant and have a free and fair election regarding which smilie is to be kicked off Smilie Sister.

Please register your votes, one per shipmate, on this thread.

And if you are still feeling creative then you can also suggest a task for the remaining smilies to complete tomorrow.

The Polls close at 00.00 midnight.


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Viola
Administrator
# 20

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Well - I'm going to vote off . I mean he's a really nice bloke and all that, but he's just so, like, down all the time, and giving off, like, negative vibes, and that's just not going to help us get through the challenges. Even though actually he was the only one trying with the castle cos no-one was talking to him. But I'm still going to vote him off and, yeah - that's it really.

--------------------
"If ye love me, keep my commandments" John 14:15

"Commandment number one: shut the hell up." Erin Etheredge 1971-2010

Posts: 4345 | From: West of England | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
strathclydezero

# 180

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I'm voting off - just cause she fancies herself far too much - and I can't stand people that fancy themselves.

--------------------
All religions will pass, but this will remain:
simply sitting in a chair and looking in the distance.
V V Rozanov

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UnShaggy

UnSurly shipmate
# 82

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has got to go. Do I need a reason? I do? OK. Because anyone who uses the phrase "Mr Grumpy" and "The spoon handle is bent" just has to go.

Plus it makes it more of a contest as strathclyde zero has voted twice for the same smilie.

[I've just removed his cheating duplicate post - Viola]

Suggestions for a task? How about putting on a fashion parade using rubber, wood and pillows as the costume material?

Love, peace and jellybeans

UnShaggy

[ 31 May 2001: Message edited by: Viola ]

--------------------
We are like sailors who on the open sea must reconstruct their ship but are never able to start afresh from the bottom. Otto Neurath


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clare
Contributing Editor
# 17

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too cool to be interesting

Posts: 2317 | From: edge of the peak district | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
QLib

Bad Example
# 43

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I'm voting for to go - for giving "brain-dead bimbos" a bad name.

--------------------
Tradition is the handing down of the flame, not the worship of the ashes Gustav Mahler.

Posts: 8913 | From: Page 28 | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Maddie
Ship's cartographer
# 11

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My vote goes for Just because he/she? was not exactly useful in the great scheme of things. Bit boring really, and all those winks give me the creeps.

Can I ponder tasks and post that separately?

Maddie


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Schroedinger's cat

Ship's cool cat
# 64

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I'm voting for because he is winding everyone up and this is supposed to be heaven.

--------------------
Blog
Music for your enjoyment
Lord may all my hard times be healing times
take out this broken heart and renew my mind.

Posts: 18859 | From: At the bottom of a deep dark well. | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
clare
Contributing Editor
# 17

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NEW FLASH; with exit polls sugesting that the vote is spread between many of the potential candidates every vote counts! Do not neglect your democratic right!

quote:
Oh yes, and maddie, of course you can suggest gruesome tasks any time you like

Posts: 2317 | From: edge of the peak district | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
strathclydezero

# 180

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I didn't cheat (at least not intentionally) - my browser was being very nasty.

--------------------
All religions will pass, but this will remain:
simply sitting in a chair and looking in the distance.
V V Rozanov

Posts: 3276 | From: The Near East | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
George Spigot

Outcast
# 253

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T.V. is Sooooo into dumbing down these days. I'm so glad I no longer own one. At least there are sites on the net where I can escape from the moribund horror of so called "reality t.v. shows"

Now what's this thread all about?
what...no!.It can't be!......................

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

--------------------
C.S. Lewis's Head is just a tool for the Devil. (And you can quote me on that.) ~
Philip Purser Hallard
http://www.thoughtplay.com/infinitarian/gbsfatb.html


Posts: 1625 | From: Derbyshire - England | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32

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I'm voting for . has had more entertainment value and should stay a while longer.

--------------------
Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake.
Andrew Knoll

Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Dave Walker

Contributing Editor
# 14

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It's got to be

I always distrust people whose mouth bears a remarkable similarity to one of their eyes.

W

--------------------
Cartoon blog / @davewalker


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shadow-lover
Shipmate
# 157

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I'm voting off because she is just far too far up herself.

He he.

The Shadow Lover

--------------------
The Shadow Lover

Nam et si ambulavero in medio umbrae mortis non timebo mala...


Posts: 56 | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Gill
Shipmate
# 102

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I vote off cos she looks too like Nicky Gumbel. Probably the token Christian - sooner she goes, the better for the rest of us. In Art as in Life...

(Well I mean - have you ever seen N.G.? It's like being preached to by a grand piano...)

Task? Bury the first contestant voted off? Make a Floating Voter out of modelling ballons (helium cannister provided) - should allow for some silly voices...

--------------------
Still hanging in there...


Posts: 1828 | From: not drowning but waving... | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Beenster
Shipmate
# 242

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I vote for because I feel like it
Posts: 1885 | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
starbelly
but you can call me Neil
# 25

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i vote off for not having done much so far
Posts: 6009 | From: High Wycombe, Buckinghamshire. | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
ChrisT

One of the Good Guys™
# 62

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I vote for , cos I can. Do I need a reason?

--------------------
Firmly on dry land

Posts: 6489 | From: Here, there and everywhere | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Arrietty

Ship's borrower
# 45

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I vote for cos I don't like her/him/it.

And it/she/he looks like Nicky Gumbel and we don't want an Alpha course in the House. Do we?

BTW my spellchecker changes Gumbel to 'Gumball'.

--------------------
i-church

Online Mission and Ministry


Posts: 6634 | From: Coventry, UK | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
clare
Contributing Editor
# 17

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DAY THREE - ACTION
The First Smilie Sister Eviction, and has to leave her much enjoyed limelight after polling a massive 6 votes. How will the remaining contestants cope without this most 'bouncing' of characters? The next days action will tell all...
The task for the day is to put on a fashion parade using rubber, wood and pillows as the costume material.

Posts: 2317 | From: edge of the peak district | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
clare
Contributing Editor
# 17

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Hey! An envelope! The next days task! reads blah blah blah fashion parade blah blah blah rubber blah wood blah pillow! Brillient! let's get going! WAKE UP EVERYONE! WAKE UP!!!!
err? uh? what? yawn. mutter mutter.
No time for lying around... there's work to be done, people to dress, wood to chop. And first... pillows to collect. Right, let's have this one... and this one... and this one...

Posts: 2317 | From: edge of the peak district | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Phil R.
Shipmate
# 128

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< So, how's it feel to be the first one evicted?

I really can't understand it. No, that can't be. I'm smilie Carol Smilie (and these are my teeth!)

<The show has been accused of dumbing down the internet - how would you respond?

Err, by SMILING. I'm smilie Carol Smi...

< ... Yes, yes, we know. is showing signs of stress. How do you think he's going to cope locked up with the others?

Oh, by swearing, shouting, and launching a "Nasty " book when he gets out. He can't smile, of course...

< Oh, and why's that?

'Cos I'm smilie C... <choke choke choke>

< Thank you, we've had quite enough of that.


Posts: 216 | From: Sussex, England | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
clare
Contributing Editor
# 17

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cool it man. i need my sleep. i'll give you my pillow when it's time to move out to the deckchair. no rush.
let's see, here's my pillow. do i need to do something creative with it? oh dear, i don't think i could 'design' anything.. can't i just pop out to marks and spensers and buy something sensible?
creative skemative - pah. not this early. bugger off and cook us a full friend brekkie if you want to be useful.
These negative attitudes won't get us anywhere! Think Can Do Not Won't Do. We Will be fantastic haute couture models of cutting edge wood, rubber and pillows! We Will!
so we're allowed to wear rubber then? this might be worth getting up for...
...And I'll load up my camera.

Posts: 2317 | From: edge of the peak district | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Stoo

Mighty Pirate
# 254

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right, so a fashion parade then.
yeah... sounds good to me. right up my street.
oh, why's that?
didn't i say? i used to be a model.
oh, pu-lease.
hey, man. that's cool.
you don't really believe ms. winky here do you?
um, guys... i'm a bit confused. who's norman?

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Posts: 5266 | From: the director of "Bikini Traffic School" | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Elizabeth
Shipmate
# 207

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I'll just balance my pillow ever so casually as I saunter in my model walk. See? It barely wobbles.
Oh. Nice. But what about the other bits?
Well, I got this nice stick pushed through my pillow but I can't seem to balance it or attach it anywhere.
Stop whining, or I'll tell you where to put that stick!
All right, that's about enough from you, Tough Boy.
So Norman has the sticks, right? Where's Norman?
Clueless, let me help you out. You go find Norman while I take a nap. Then come back, pile your pillows on the deck chair, and you can both carry me through the fashion parade.
All the way back to that castle thingy?

--------------------
The Hunger Site is back!

Posts: 669 | From: The Place of Knee Deep Leaves | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Maddie
Ship's cartographer
# 11

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Right then, lets review, what have you all got so far?

Oh I don't know really, can't really sort this out

oh shut up, right I'm chopping that bit of fence down and am going to make an outfit from that.

fence? Should you do that?

I'm off to find some rubber, I quite fancy a little rubber number

gosh, well I have my outfit all ready, two pillows linked with wooden spoons.

I can't really be bothered, if you all do everything for me I will be willing to join in.

why don't you get off you backside and DO something, you lazy good for nothing piece of ****


Posts: 1304 | From: East of England | Registered: Apr 2001  |  IP: Logged
Gill
Shipmate
# 102

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I've had this all wrong. I thought you was all girls. Lor luvaduck no Lesbo romps then?

Best make the most of the rubber then. Can I take this dress off now? And you, darlin'...
Oooooooohhhhhh.........
Still waters run deep, man!

*Shagging noises just off camera...*


[fixed code]

[ 02 June 2001: Message edited by: Viola ]

--------------------
Still hanging in there...


Posts: 1828 | From: not drowning but waving... | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32

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DAY FOUR - VOTING DAY

It looks like there's been a pause in the action, so I'll get things rolling.

This time I'm voting off , who has been the least interesting character IMO.

--------------------
Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake.
Andrew Knoll


Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
strathclydezero

# 180

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... how exciting, the second voting day ...

I'm voting off 'cause (s)he just sits around all day and helps none of the other smilies - absolutely useless!

((s)he also fancies himself - another good reason to be done with him/her

--------------------
All religions will pass, but this will remain:
simply sitting in a chair and looking in the distance.
V V Rozanov


Posts: 3276 | From: The Near East | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Maddie
Ship's cartographer
# 11

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I vote off because he is clearly useless!

Maddie


Posts: 1304 | From: East of England | Registered: Apr 2001  |  IP: Logged
Stoo

Mighty Pirate
# 254

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so... who are you gonna vote for?
you know we're not allowed to discuss that!
yeah, i know. i was just thinking about though. he's a really nice guy, but he doesn't do anything.
yeah, i know what you mean.
you know, i had a dream last night about the last three contestants. it was you, me and .
really?

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Posts: 5266 | From: the director of "Bikini Traffic School" | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Stoo

Mighty Pirate
# 254

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well, i need a poo. i'll see ya later.

< enters. >

oh, hi!
hey man.
i was just saying to how i think you're in with a chance of winning.
you think so?
oh, definitely. right. i'm off to cast my vote.

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Posts: 5266 | From: the director of "Bikini Traffic School" | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Viola
Administrator
# 20

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Remember guys - as well as voting off, there's also the task setting to keep up with...

Competition for which smilie has had the most 'interesting' job maybe?

You can do better than that though can't you?

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"If ye love me, keep my commandments" John 14:15

"Commandment number one: shut the hell up." Erin Etheredge 1971-2010


Posts: 4345 | From: West of England | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
strathclydezero

# 180

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we could have a competition to find out which smilie is the *best* Christian!

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All religions will pass, but this will remain:
simply sitting in a chair and looking in the distance.
V V Rozanov

Posts: 3276 | From: The Near East | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32

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How about:
Write and perform a profound-yet-entertaining existentialist musicial comedy with critical-yet-affectionate allusions to Aeschylus, Chekov, Satre, Kabuki Theatre, and the works of Aaron Spelling.

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Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake.
Andrew Knoll

Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Gill
Shipmate
# 102

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All the above BUT with specific reference to Verfremdungseffekt.

I vote off - it's only kind.

Anyway sooner or later s/he's gonna interrupt something exciting with those silly questions.

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Still hanging in there...


Posts: 1828 | From: not drowning but waving... | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Viola
Administrator
# 20

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So - it seems that is leaving us. The press are queuing outside the house eager for interviews.

Meanwhile the remaining contestants puzzle over their next challenge.

Writing and performing a musical eh? Wonder if it's OK to use songs from existing musicals...?

And just as well someone's brought in a guitar that they can play 3 chords on.

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"If ye love me, keep my commandments" John 14:15

"Commandment number one: shut the hell up." Erin Etheredge 1971-2010


Posts: 4345 | From: West of England | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32

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>How do you feel about our viewers voting you off?

Hey, whatever floats their boats, man.

>How do you answer accusations of having been lazy and useless?

Just that some folks seriously need to chill. Life is a journey, man. Later.

>Wait, just a few more questions...

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Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake.
Andrew Knoll


Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32

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Okay, this musical has to include allusions to...let's see...Aeschylus, Chekov--

The guy from Star Trek?

Shut up, you ********!! Go on.

...Sartre, Kabuki Theatre, Aaron Spelling--

I see the first scene! Electra enters with a chorus of former Charlie's Angels and decides God doesn't exist because her pet seagull died. It just works on so many different levels!

...Ver-frem-WHAT?? Oh, we'll figure that out later...

I keep trying to get this guitar to sound like a shamisen, but there's just so much I can do...

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Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake.
Andrew Knoll


Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32

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I like that scene--especially as Electra creates another allusion to Sartre's The Flies.

How do you know so much about Sartre?

I lectured on Existentialism for a semester.

How does The Flies end? Maybe we can just tack it on--we're running out of time.

Electra cravenly returns to the guilt-code of Conventional Morality after refusing to accept ultimate responsibility for the actions of killing Clytemnestra and Aegisthus, while Orestes, despite being accursed by the Furies with a plague of flies, achieves the freedom of a rational being able to determine his own morality.

Oh dear...

Let's just set all the words to Gilbert-And-Sullivan tunes--any moron can do it, and it's public domain anyway...

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Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake.
Andrew Knoll


Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Elizabeth
Shipmate
# 207

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Okay, then. Costumes. Everybody got theirs on?
Yes. But these Greek robe thingies....I can't do the Bunny Hop part of the chorus line in them. My legs get all tangled up.
You know, my voice really echoes inside this mask. Listen.......ekkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkko.
Look, I told you, the Bunny Hop is O-U-T. It's a conga line.
Is that right foot in, left foot out? Or left foot in, hop, hop, hop?
And give Whiny the scissors to cut off the parts of her sheet dragging on the stage. She's going to break her neck.
Help! I can't see through the mask. Where are you all? The eyeholes are too far apart!

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The Hunger Site is back!

Posts: 669 | From: The Place of Knee Deep Leaves | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged



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