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Source: (consider it)
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Thread: Hell: Bumper stickers they SHOULD display
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Ags
Knocked up
# 204
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Posted
"I may be indicating left, and I may be going to turn left, but I'm going to swing out waaay to the right in front of you before I do so!"
(Swap the lefts & rights if you're in the US)
Love Ags
![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
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I think that we are most ourselves at our best, because that is what God intended us to be. The us we really like, the us that others love to be with. Moth
Posts: 2707 | From: London | Registered: May 2001
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Iestyn
Shipmate
# 2422
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Posted
A small construction/scaffolding company on the south coast of England used to have a bumper sticker on all its vehicles which said "satisfaction with every erection"
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"And we'll be singing Hymns and Arias, Hen wlad fy nhadau, Ar hyd y nos"
Posts: 177 | From: South Wales | Registered: Mar 2002
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Ham'n'Eggs
Ship's Pig
# 629
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Posted
There must be easier ways to start an urban myth... ![[Disappointed]](graemlins/disappointed.gif)
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"...the heresies that men do leave / Are hated most of those they did deceive" - Will S
Posts: 3103 | From: Genghis Khan's sleep depot | Registered: Jun 2001
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Astro
Shipmate
# 84
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Posted
Not a sticker but
there was a removals firm Patel & Patel
whose slogan was
You've tried the Cowboys now try the Indians
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if you look around the world today – whether you're an atheist or a believer – and think that the greatest problem facing us is other people's theologies, you are yourself part of the problem. - Andrew Brown (The Guardian)
Posts: 2723 | From: Chiltern Hills | Registered: May 2001
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The Mid
Officer and a gentleman
# 1559
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by tomb:
And Mid, why the Thoreau quotation? Given your profession, I should have thought
quote:
I must go down to the sea again!
To the lonely sea and the sky.
And all I ask is a tall ship
And a star to steer her by....
would be more in your line of work.
Not that I really give a damn about symmetry when it comes to 19th century American romanticism, mind you....
Have you ever tried to navigate a ship by astro-navigation? It's a real bugger, I can tell you. Give me a good old GPS any day!!!
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For God so loved the world She got involved
Posts: 3022 | From: The Wardroom | Registered: Oct 2001
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The Mid
Officer and a gentleman
# 1559
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Posted
My ex has a sign on the back of her car saying,
"You call me a bitch as if it were a bad thing"
Kind of appropriate sometimes.....(hehehe - I gave it too her) ![[Snigger]](graemlins/snigger.gif)
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For God so loved the world She got involved
Posts: 3022 | From: The Wardroom | Registered: Oct 2001
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Ann
Curious
# 94
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Iestyn:
A small construction/scaffolding company on the south coast of England used to have a bumper sticker on all its vehicles which said "satisfaction with every erection"
Not to mention the Removals Company from Maidenhead ...
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Ann
Posts: 3271 | From: IO 91 PI | Registered: May 2001
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Ann
Curious
# 94
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Posted
The number of times I've had to follow cars needing the bumper sticker, "I can't afford to replace my indicator bulbs until the recession's over."
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Ann
Posts: 3271 | From: IO 91 PI | Registered: May 2001
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dolphy
Lady of Perpetual Responsiblity
# 862
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Posted
Seen recently in Bournemouth:
Thank you for parking so f*****g close; next time please provide a tin opener.
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Looking forward to my rock moving closer again.
Posts: 15134 | From: my camper van | Registered: Jul 2001
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Dr. C
Apprentice
# 3302
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Ham'n'Eggs:
The presence of these signs alerts ,the emergency serices> to the fact that there is probably a small body (possibly alive) to account for, so they need to take extra precautions with cutting gear etc.
Nope, if this were genuinely the case the glass of the back window would be the last place to put the sign as this would most likely be crunched in an accident, if it were still there at all. It would be more effective to have stickers on the metalwork of the door struts which is what will be cut through.
Parents invariably feel the need to boast about the fact they've had babies and this is just another way of doing it (to the complete stranger following you). If you must, boast about the fact you've brought up well rounded young adults in 20 years time, pretty much anyone can pop out a baby - it's really not that special.
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http://www.c-b-c.org.uk
Posts: 26 | From: UK | Registered: Sep 2002
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daronmedway
Shipmate
# 3012
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Posted
I've just read through this whole thread hoping to add my 'The Christian Right is neither' contribution to find I'd been pipped to the post. Ho hum, story of my life...
Anyway, welcome Monty Moose! I found it funny too.
I saw one today that said: Got a problem? Just try Jesus.
It left me wondering whether it was offering advice or the 'one upping' type of consolation that only really annoying people can manage.
Posts: 6976 | From: Southampton | Registered: Jul 2002
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daronmedway
Shipmate
# 3012
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by jlg:
Sorry for the nonsequitor. I hit reply witout realizing that there was a second page.
Ditto.
P.S. Double post aswell, sorry.
Posts: 6976 | From: Southampton | Registered: Jul 2002
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Wm Duncan
Buoy tender
# 3021
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Posted
In all these years, I'd NEVER thought that "baby on board" was intended as an alert to the rescue personnel in case of accident; I'd always assumed it was to serve notice that it's okay for the car to be in the carpool lanes.
Wm Duncan
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I have overcome a fiercely anti-Catholic upbringing in order to attend Mass simply and solely to escape Protestant guitars. Why am I here? Who gave these nice Catholics guitars?
-- Annie Dillard
Posts: 1193 | From: about 30 km above the Juan de Fuca plate | Registered: Jul 2002
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multipara
Shipmate
# 2918
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Posted
There is a variant on "baby on board":
"mother-in-law in trunk" (boot in Oz).
My own favourites go thus:
"I owe, I owe, it's off to work I go"
and
"Mum's Taxi".
Yet another which used to grace the 1960 EK Holden belonging to a friend (this was a two-tone monster with tail fins, a 3-speed column shift and a clutch made for a gorilla):
"At least I own it".
cheers,
m ( ex-taxidriver for the tribe who learnt to drive in Ethel the EK Holden)
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quod scripsi, scripsi
Posts: 4985 | From: new south wales | Registered: Jun 2002
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Campbellite
Ut unum sint
# 1202
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Posted
Some time ago I saw a Bumper sticker that read,
"Buy American".
It was on the back of a VW!
I read about a sticker in Germany, seen on the back of a VERY small car,
"Wenn ich gross bin, ueberheule ich euch alle!"
"When I grow up, I'm gonna pass you all!"
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I upped mine. Up yours.
Suffering for Jesus since 1966.
WTFWED?
Posts: 12001 | From: between keyboard and chair | Registered: Aug 2001
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Chorister
Completely Frocked
# 473
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Posted
I saw it today! Following a breakdown truck along the dual carriageway:
Make a parent smile - run over a paedophile.
And I thought this one belonged in the realm of Urban myths........
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Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.
Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001
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Lady A
Narnian Lady
# 3126
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Posted
A very long time ago, I went to a Barry McGuire concert and he said he'd like a bumper sticker worth reading, like "I'd rather be a sardine in the bait tank of the Lord, than a killer whale in the jacuzzi of the devil" I've yet to see it on anything though....
Posts: 2545 | From: The Lion's Mane, Narnia | Registered: Aug 2002
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sisyphus
Apprentice
# 2841
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Posted
on a motorcyclist's jacket:
if you can read this, the bitch fell off.
Posts: 9 | From: toronto | Registered: May 2002
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RuthW
liberal "peace first" hankie squeezer
# 13
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Posted
My favorite bumper sticker, one I see often on a car parked in my neighborhood: it's for a tattoo parlor, and the tagline is "FUCK YEAH, IT HURTS!"
Posts: 24453 | From: La La Land | Registered: Apr 2001
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Erin
Meaner than Godzilla
# 2
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Posted
<tangent>
Only if you're a big wimp.
</tangent>
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Commandment number one: shut the hell up.
Posts: 17140 | From: 330 miles north of paradise | Registered: Mar 2001
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jlg
What is this place?
Why am I here?
# 98
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Posted
My daughter put
There are three kinds of people in the world:
those who can count and those who can't
on her car when she was in high school. She reported that none of the guys she worked with at the grocery store understood it. ![[Roll Eyes]](rolleyes.gif)
Posts: 17391 | From: Just a Town, New Hampshire, USA | Registered: May 2001
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Sauerkraut
Shipmate
# 3112
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Posted
I know this is commenting on a post from a while back, but I wasn't a member then.
This is one to answer all the "My child is on the honor role of ..."
My Kid Can Beat Up Your Honor Student
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We want not an amalgam or compromise, but both things at the top of their energy; love and wrath both burning. Christianity got over the difficulty of combining furious opposites, by keeping them both, and keeping them both furious.--G.K. Chesterton
Posts: 196 | From: The middle of the US | Registered: Jul 2002
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Campbellite
Ut unum sint
# 1202
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Posted
"In case of rapture, can I have your car?"
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I upped mine. Up yours.
Suffering for Jesus since 1966.
WTFWED?
Posts: 12001 | From: between keyboard and chair | Registered: Aug 2001
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Chorister
Completely Frocked
# 473
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Posted
My last car had a TOGS sticker on it. I am no longer young.
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Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.
Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001
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tomb
Shipmate
# 174
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Posted
[host hat on]
Let's keep URL references to a minimum, shall we? If I have to go to another web site to get the joke, it tends to disrupt the conversation of the thread. Threads such as this are about sharing things we find humorous, not providing resources.
Thanks.
[host hat off]
Posts: 5039 | From: Denver, Colorado | Registered: May 2001
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Sauerkraut
Shipmate
# 3112
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Posted
I thought of another one:
Some people are so open-minded that their brains leaked out.
Credit that one to Steve Taylor.
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We want not an amalgam or compromise, but both things at the top of their energy; love and wrath both burning. Christianity got over the difficulty of combining furious opposites, by keeping them both, and keeping them both furious.--G.K. Chesterton
Posts: 196 | From: The middle of the US | Registered: Jul 2002
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Lady A
Narnian Lady
# 3126
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Posted
I used to have this just stuck in my back window:
"Grace Happens"
Seemed an optimistic counter to the **** happens
Posts: 2545 | From: The Lion's Mane, Narnia | Registered: Aug 2002
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Moo
Ship's tough old bird
# 107
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Posted
I once saw a VW Beetle being towed by a good-sized truck.
There was a bumper sticker on the Beetle which said,
I'M PUSHING
Moo
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Kerygmania host
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See you later, alligator.
Posts: 20365 | From: Alleghany Mountains of Virginia | Registered: May 2001
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St. Sebastian
Staggering ever onward
# 312
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Posted
I had this made for a friend of mine who's a priest (yes I made it up my own self!):
IN THE EVENT OF THE RAPTURE THIS CAR WILL CAREEN
INTO THE UNSAVED.
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St. Seb
In Spite of Everything: Yes.
Posts: 962 | From: Burlington, North Carolina | Registered: May 2001
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Raspberry Rabbit
Will preach for food
# 3080
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Posted
This is already a long thread and forgive me if I didn't read this earlier but I saw a version of the traditional "baby on board' sign which read
Wife in trunk
Raspberry Rabbit
Montreal, QC
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...naked pirates not respecting boundaries...
(((BLOG)))
Posts: 2215 | From: In the middle of France | Registered: Jul 2002
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Campbellite
Ut unum sint
# 1202
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Posted
My other car is ALSO a piece of sh*t.
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I upped mine. Up yours.
Suffering for Jesus since 1966.
WTFWED?
Posts: 12001 | From: between keyboard and chair | Registered: Aug 2001
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Campbellite
Ut unum sint
# 1202
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Posted
PETA - People Eating Tasty Animals
I would apologize for the double post but this is Hell so I don't hafta.
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I upped mine. Up yours.
Suffering for Jesus since 1966.
WTFWED?
Posts: 12001 | From: between keyboard and chair | Registered: Aug 2001
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Zeke
Ship's Inquirer
# 3271
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Posted
The best bumper sticker I have ever had said:
Jesus is coming--Look Busy.
I don't have that car anymore, and have looked in vain for another sticker like that, giggled at by both religious and nonreligious alike.
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No longer the Bishop of Durham
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If men are so wicked with religion, what would they be without it? --Benjamin Franklin
Posts: 5259 | From: Deep in the American desert | Registered: Sep 2002
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Campbellite
Ut unum sint
# 1202
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Posted
Bad theology, I know, but this IS hell and I found it amusing:
Jesus is coming - and boy is he pissed! ("angry" for all you Brits).
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I upped mine. Up yours.
Suffering for Jesus since 1966.
WTFWED?
Posts: 12001 | From: between keyboard and chair | Registered: Aug 2001
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babybear
Bear faced and cheeky with it
# 34
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Posted
[UM warning]
Seen on a Rolls-Royce "My other car is a Porche."
[/warning]
bb
Posts: 13287 | From: Cottage of the 3 Bears (and The Gremlin) | Registered: May 2001
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sophs
Sardonic Angel
# 2296
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Posted
On the back of a Volvo
You do it safer in a Volvo
ANd it had a cheesy lipstick kiss next to it as well ![[Mad]](mad.gif)
Posts: 5407 | From: searching saharas of sorrow | Registered: Feb 2002
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Foxy
Shipmate
# 2409
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Posted
I drove for several miles behind "Visualize Whirled Peas" snerking with laughter the whole way.
Posts: 499 | From: 11 blocks west | Registered: Mar 2002
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mousethief
Ship's Thieving Rodent
# 953
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Posted
In case of the Rapture,
can I have your car?
--Reader Alexis
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This is the last sig I'll ever write for you...
Posts: 63536 | From: Washington | Registered: Jul 2001
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Miss_Molly
Toujours gai
Beloved
# 2339
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Posted
I used to have one from the local independent radio station:
KRCL Radio Free Utah
Utah is frequently referred to by its Gentile population as being behind the Zion Curtain.
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"I come from a state that raises corn, and cockleburrs and Democrats, and frothy eloquence neither convinces nor satisfies me. I am from Missouri. You have got to show me"
Congressman Willard Duncan Vandiver at a naval banquet in Philadelphia, 1899
Posts: 1242 | From: home | Registered: Feb 2002
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Sarkycow
La belle Dame sans merci
# 1012
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Posted
Saw a sticker I WANT!!!
www.getoffmyass.com
Viki
[Please note, this is not a web link, it is thw actual text of the bumper sticker.]
[ 13. October 2002, 23:38: Message edited by: sarkycow ]
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“Just because your voice reaches halfway around the world doesn't mean you are wiser than when it reached only to the end of the bar.”
Posts: 10787 | Registered: Jul 2001
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Moo
Ship's tough old bird
# 107
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Miss_Molly:
Utah is frequently referred to by its Gentile population as being behind the Zion Curtain.
A friend of mine who lived in Utah for many years has a sweatshirt advertising a certain brand of coffee.
Since Mormons are not supposed to drink coffee, when a non-Mormon sees someone wearing such a shirt, he immediately knows that this is another non-Mormon.
Moo
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Kerygmania host
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See you later, alligator.
Posts: 20365 | From: Alleghany Mountains of Virginia | Registered: May 2001
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Lata
Apprentice
# 2618
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Posted
I always wanted:
I can't do hill starts.
for all those people who stop too close to me on a hill....
Posts: 5 | From: UK | Registered: Apr 2002
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Campbellite
Ut unum sint
# 1202
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Posted
I like the sticker which, in very small print, reads:
If you can read this, you're too damn close!
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I upped mine. Up yours.
Suffering for Jesus since 1966.
WTFWED?
Posts: 12001 | From: between keyboard and chair | Registered: Aug 2001
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Esmeralda
Ship's token UK Mennonite
# 582
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Iestyn:
A small construction/scaffolding company on the south coast of England used to have a bumper sticker on all its vehicles which said "satisfaction with every erection"
It still does - I was behind one in Muswell Hill (North London) the other day ![[Eek!]](eek.gif)
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I can take the despair. It's the hope I can't stand.
http://reversedstandard.wordpress.com/
Posts: 17415 | From: A small island nobody pays any attention to | Registered: Jun 2001
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