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Source: (consider it)
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Thread: Old Jokes Home...
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jedijudy
Organist of the Jedi Temple
# 333
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Posted
How do you catch a unique rabbit?
You 'neak up on it.
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How do you catch a tame rabbit?
Tame way. You 'neak up on it.
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Jasmine, little cat with a big heart.
Posts: 18017 | From: 'Twixt the 'Glades and the Gulf | Registered: Aug 2001
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would love to belong
Shipmate
# 16747
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Posted
An older guy from the Hebrides goes on his first visit to London.
He is wandering around Soho and goes into a pub and gets into conversation with a rather attractive young lady.
After a while he asks her "And what are you doing here, my dear?"
She replies "I'm a call* girl".
Greatly cheered, the visitor responds "I'm from Tiree m'self!"
* Coll
Posts: 331 | From: Lost and confused | Registered: Oct 2011
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would love to belong
Shipmate
# 16747
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Posted
A wee Glasgow guy is walking down the street with his dug Rover who is foaming at the mouth and snarling ferociously. He bumps into his pal who asks him where he's going with the animal.
"I'm going to the vet to get Rover put down".
His pal replies looks at Rover and asks "Is he mad?"
The owner replies "Well, he's no too pleased about it".
Posts: 331 | From: Lost and confused | Registered: Oct 2011
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
Speaking of dog jokes . . .
A man walking down the street noticed another man sitting on a bench with his dog alongside him, around whose neck hung a sign, "Dog for sale."
"That's a great looking dog," said the first man. "Why are you selling it?" "Better let the dog tell you," the second man replied.
Whereupon the dog began: "I've lived a long and productive life. I was born into a circus family and did tricks for a while until they discovered I was good at jumping through flaming hoops. After that they had me trained as a rescue dog, and I spent several years pulling people out of burning buildings. But I'm old now and ready to retire to a nice, quiet home where a new owner will have me."
"Wow!" the first man exclaimed. "That's a really special dog. I really don't understand why you want to sell him."
"Because he's a damn liar!" the second man retorted. "Don't believe a word he says!"
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"I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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Sir Kevin
Ship's Gaffer
# 3492
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Posted
Good one!
![[Killing me]](graemlins/killingme.gif) ![[Yipee]](graemlins/spin.gif)
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If you board the wrong train, it is no use running along the corridor in the other direction Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Writing is currently my hobby, not yet my profession.
Posts: 30517 | From: White Hart Lane | Registered: Oct 2002
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The Rogue
Shipmate
# 2275
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Posted
What do you call a Host with a machine gun?
Sir.
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If everyone starts thinking outside the box does outside the box come back inside?
Posts: 2507 | From: Toton | Registered: Feb 2002
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jedijudy
Organist of the Jedi Temple
# 333
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by The Rogue:
Sir.
![[Disappointed]](graemlins/disappointed.gif)
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Jasmine, little cat with a big heart.
Posts: 18017 | From: 'Twixt the 'Glades and the Gulf | Registered: Aug 2001
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Ann
Curious
# 94
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Posted
What's the difference between a stoat and a weasel?
A weasel is weaselly recognisable but a stoat is stoatally different!
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Ann
Posts: 3271 | From: IO 91 PI | Registered: May 2001
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would love to belong
Shipmate
# 16747
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Posted
A wee salmon is spawned on the waters of Loch Lomond and is called Rusty.
Rusty grows up to be a bigger salmon and eventually the great day arrives when he sets off to explore the great, wide world.
He swims down the River Leven to the River Clyde, into the Firth of Clyde and eventually reaches the Atlantic Ocean and swims across to Canada where he spends several years making his fortune and having lots of adventures and meeting and marrying a beautiful Canadian salmon who becomes Mrs Rusty.
In due course, it is time for Rusty to return to his home in Loch Lomond to do what a salmon has to do to ensure the procreation of more little salmon.
Rusty swims all the way back across the North Atlantic to the Firth of Clyde, up the Clyde and the Leven and finds a nice wee bolthole in Loch Lomond at Inversnaid.
He finds life quite dull, though, missing his exciting life with his Canadian salmon friends.
To pass the time he decides to write a book about his adventurous life. The only problem he has is finding a suitable title which might result in a Booker Prize nomination.
After a lot of thought he settles upon The Atlantic Ventures by Salmon Rusty.
[ 08. August 2013, 04:14: Message edited by: would love to belong ]
Posts: 331 | From: Lost and confused | Registered: Oct 2011
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tessaB
Shipmate
# 8533
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Posted
What's the difference between a buffalo and a bison?
You can't wash your hands in a buffalo!
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tessaB
eating chocolate to the glory of God
Holiday cottage near Rye
Posts: 1068 | From: U.K. | Registered: Sep 2004
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would love to belong
Shipmate
# 16747
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Posted
What's the difference between God and a doctor?
God doesn't think He's a doctor.
Posts: 331 | From: Lost and confused | Registered: Oct 2011
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would love to belong
Shipmate
# 16747
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Posted
Man A: I went to Timothy White's to buy a thermos flask but they didn't have any left.
Man B: Have you tried Boots?
Man A: Ah did, but the tea just came out the lace holes.
Posts: 331 | From: Lost and confused | Registered: Oct 2011
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Albertus
Shipmate
# 13356
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Posted
Wayne and Coleen Rooney are out shopping and Coleen spots a thermos flask. 'Look', she says to him, 'why don't you get one of those?'
'What does it do?' he says
'It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold. you could use it for your refreshements when you're training.'
'Good idea', he says, and he buys it.
Next day at training he's in the dressing room getting his stuff out of his bag, and he takes out the flask.
- 'What's that?' asks a team-mate.
- 'It's a thermos flask. It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold.'
- 'That's brilliant! What have you got in it?'
- 'Two cups of coffee and a choc ice.'
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My beard is a testament to my masculinity and virility, and demonstrates that I am a real man. Trouble is, bits of quiche sometimes get caught in it.
Posts: 6498 | From: Y Sowth | Registered: Jan 2008
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Timothy the Obscure
Mostly Friendly
# 292
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by would love to belong:
What's the difference between God and a doctor?
God doesn't think He's a doctor.
More elaborate version:
A man dies, and is waiting in line to check in to Heaven (the computer is slow, St. Peter is very apologetic). A man in a white coat with a stethoscope around his neck comes up, gives Peter a wave, and breezes through the gates.
The guy waiting in line says, "Hey, how come he gets to jump the line just because he's a doctor?"
Peter says, "Oh he's not a doctor, he's God. He just likes to play doctor."
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When you think of the long and gloomy history of man, you will find more hideous crimes have been committed in the name of obedience than have ever been committed in the name of rebellion.
- C. P. Snow
Posts: 6114 | From: PDX | Registered: May 2001
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Theophania
Shipmate
# 16647
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Posted
Q. Why do Communists drink herbal tea?
A. Because proper tea is theft.
Posts: 78 | Registered: Sep 2011
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Herrick
Shipmate
# 15226
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Posted
An Englishman, a Frenchman and an Italian were walking along a country lane. They came upon a pig stuck in a hedge with its rear end pointing towards them.
'I wish it was a woman' said the Italian.
The Frenchman said, 'I wish it was cooked'.
The Englishman said. 'I wish it was dark'.
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A careless shoestring in whose tie
I see a wild civility
Posts: 1194 | From: NSW | Registered: Oct 2009
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rolyn
Shipmate
# 16840
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Posted
An elderly couple were sitting quietly together one evening and decided to 'fess up' as to whether they had remained faithful during 50 yrs of marriage .
He went first and said "I've never looked at another woman dearest, in all the years we've been married" .
Then it was her turn and she shyly admitted to being unfaithful on 3 occasions . "Oh dear" said the disappointed husband , "How did this come to happen ?"
"You remember way back when we hadn't long been married when you desperately wanted that loan to set up business , and the bank manager changed his mind and let you have it ? Well that was my doing"
"Oka-y" says the husband feeling slightly more reassured. "What about the 2nd time ?"
"You remember that time when you had a near fatal heart-attack and we couldn't get anyone to operate except that one private Doctor ? That was my doing"
The husband was now feeling a lot better and realised that his loving wife only ever had his best interests at heart.
Overwhelmed he says "You love me so much my dear you were prepared to do these things . BTW what was the last occasion ?"
"Well" she said , "You remember when you retired and desperately wanted to join that all-male golf club ? You had to have a unanimous vote to get in"
"Yes I do," he replied . "Seventeen chaps voted against me then ,inexplicably , one by one they changed their mind".
The wife looks up contentedly from her knitting and says "All for you my dearest, all for you". ![[Biased]](wink.gif)
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Change is the only certainty of existence
Posts: 3206 | From: U.K. | Registered: Dec 2011
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Eirenist
Shipmate
# 13343
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Posted
Here's a dated and rather un-PC offering:
Two big tough lumps of tarmac went into a bar and ordered a couple of pints of beer. They stood there, drinking, glaring at the other customers and passing offensive comments, with much f-ing and blinding, till the door opened and a lump of pink tarmac came in. 'A teeny-weeny vodka martini, sweetie, with a twist of lemon and not too much ice.'
The barman served the new customer, then turned to the other two lumps of tarmac, expecting trouble. But to his surprise, they were cowering under a table at the far side of the room. After the pink tarmac had gone, they crawled out of their hiding place, still shaking.
'What's up with you two?' asked the barman. 'You were making yourselves out to be hard! You're not scared of the likes of him, surely?'
The two lumps of tarmac looked at each other. 'Oh, mate!' one of them said at length, 'you don't want to tangle with him. He's a cyclepath!'
Note for the uninitiated: Tarmac is bitumen. In Britain, cycle-tracks used to be coloured pink (now mostly green).
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'I think I think, therefore I think I am'
Posts: 486 | From: Darkest Metroland | Registered: Jan 2008
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ArachnidinElmet
Shipmate
# 17346
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Posted
Three older ladies decide to go to the local park. They find a nice shady spot, sit down and start chatting. Imagine their surprise when a young man sits down on the bench next to them and proceeds to remove his clothes. Finally, completely naked, he turns to the women and greets them, 'Good Morning'.
The first woman turns to the man, looks him up and down and has a stroke.
The second woman, also on examining the man, has a stroke.
The third woman would have had a stroke, but sadly couldn't reach.
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'If a pleasant, straight-forward life is not possible then one must try to wriggle through by subtle manoeuvres' - Kafka
Posts: 1887 | From: the rhubarb triangle | Registered: Sep 2012
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LutheranChik
Shipmate
# 9826
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Posted
A man dies and to his surprise and horror finds himself in Hell.
"Greetings!" says the Devil, shaking the man's hand. "We've been expecting you. Now, I know you've heard all sorts of terrible things about this place, but we are actually quite accomodating of our guests. I'll bet you didn't know that we actually give you your choice of eternal punishment."
The frightened deceased begins to relax a bit. "Really?"
"Oh, sure! Here -- let me show you." The Devil leads the man to a hallway with three doors. "Behind each of these doors is a punishment. I'll give you a little look-see, and then you can think it over and decide where you want to spend eternity."
The devil opens the first door, and the man sees an enormous room filled with filthy people standing neck -high in manure.
"Oh, my," murmurs the man, aghast. "Um...may I see Door Number 2?"
"Certainly," says the Devil, opening the second door. There the man sees an equally enormous room filled with filthy people standing waist-high in manure.
"You still look disappointed," notes the Devil. "But there's still one more door." He opens the third door, and the man looks out upon an enormous room filled with filthy people standing knee-high in manure, drinking coffee and chatting.
The man thinks about his options. "Door Number 1 is truly awful," he muses. "Door Number 2 isn't that much better. But Door Number 3 -- well, it seems the best of bad choices, and at least I'll be able to enjoy a cup of joe and maybe make some friends.
"I think I'll spend eternity behind Door Number 3," the man finally says. The Devil smiles.
"An excellent choice. Let's set you up there then."
So a couple of Satan's minions find the man a place to stand in the manure and hand him a cup of coffee. They join the Devil in the doorway, where the trio look out on the crowd for a few moments.
"Okay!" the Devil suddenly shouts. "Coffee break is over, you losers! Back to standing on your heads!"
[ 19. August 2013, 00:08: Message edited by: LutheranChik ]
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Simul iustus et peccator
http://www.lutheranchiklworddiary.blogspot.com
Posts: 6462 | From: rural Michigan, USA | Registered: Jul 2005
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Lord Jestocost
Shipmate
# 12909
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Posted
This old joke is now three weeks older than it was on 29th July ...
Posts: 761 | From: The Instrumentality of Man | Registered: Aug 2007
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georgiaboy
Shipmate
# 11294
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Posted
Three ladies again (sorry!)
Three deaf ladies on a London bus:
First Lady: 'I say, is this Wembley?'
Second Lady: 'No, dear, it's Thursday.'
Third Lady: 'So am I. Let's get off this bus and find a pub.'
(First heard around 1960.)
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You can't retire from a calling.
Posts: 1675 | From: saint meinrad, IN | Registered: Apr 2006
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lilBuddha
Shipmate
# 14333
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Posted
An elderly gentleman notices two elderly women sitting waiting for the bus and decides to give them a thrill. He hides behind the hedge and removes his clothing then runs past them.
As they gasp in astonishment, one turns to the other and exclaims "What was that?!"
"Not certain', said the other, "but it needed ironing".
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I put on my rockin' shoes in the morning
Hallellou, hallellou
Posts: 17627 | From: the round earth's imagined corners | Registered: Dec 2008
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Lord Jestocost
Shipmate
# 12909
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Posted
Not technically old jokes yet, but destined to become so, are this year's winners of the funniest lines from the fringe.
The overall winner:
quote:
"I heard a rumour that Cadbury is bringing out an oriental chocolate bar. Could be a Chinese Wispa."
Posts: 761 | From: The Instrumentality of Man | Registered: Aug 2007
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Eirenist
Shipmate
# 13343
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Posted
A man goes into a Rolls-Royce showroom and stands looking at the cars on sale. A salesman comes up to him. 'Can I help you, sir?' 'I'm not sure. I don't know how to drive, and I'm looking for a car to learn on.' 'Well, sir, I think perhaps you should come back once you've learned to drive. I think a Rover might be nearer sir's mark.
So, he goes to a Rover dealer and looks at the cars there. A salesman asks if he can help, and the man repeats that he wants a car to learn on. 'Oh, says the salesman, 'you need something cheap and cheerful. Why not try a Ford?'
So he goes to a Ford dealer, and tells them he wants a car to learn on. 'Well,' says the man, 'it's all a matter of road sense first of all. Nothing like a bike to get that.'
So he goes to a cycle shop. 'Learning to ride a bicycle is all a question of balance,' says the shopman. For that, you ought to get a hoop.'
So the man goes to a toyshop and buys a hoop, and spends many a happy day bowling it up hill and down dale. One day he comes to a pub, leans his hoop against a wall and goes in to get a beer. While he is in there, a motorist backs into his hoop and breaks it. The man is furious.
'I'm very sorry,' says the motorist. 'Look, I'll pay for a new hoop. Can we shake hands on that?'
'That's all very well,' says the man, 'but how the devil do you think I'm going to get home?'
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'I think I think, therefore I think I am'
Posts: 486 | From: Darkest Metroland | Registered: Jan 2008
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Dafyd
Shipmate
# 5549
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Posted
From the Independent:
Intellectual jokes.
One of those is so old that Adam told it to Eve. And Eve had heard it before.
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we remain, thanks to original sin, much in love with talking about, rather than with, one another. Rowan Williams
Posts: 10567 | From: Edinburgh | Registered: Feb 2004
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Firenze
Ordinary decent pagan
# 619
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Dafyd:
From the Independent:
Intellectual jokes.
One of those is so old that Adam told it to Eve. And Eve had heard it before.
I like #25.
Posts: 17302 | From: Edinburgh | Registered: Jun 2001
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QLib
Bad Example
# 43
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Posted
Yes, I think the dyslexic one is quite old, though I still like it. And another vote for 25. Don't get 12 - and maybe I don't get 20, or maybe it's just not very funny.
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Tradition is the handing down of the flame, not the worship of the ashes Gustav Mahler.
Posts: 8913 | From: Page 28 | Registered: May 2001
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QLib
Bad Example
# 43
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Curiosity killed ...:
A group of crows is a murder of crows.
0K = absolute zero
Oh, thanks, CK... well, forgot about the crows.
It wasn't the OK one I didn't - must have got the number wrong, sorry - it was the Chomsky one, which I think I do get but I just don't think it's funny. [Linguists don't ever say something is wrong (?)]
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Tradition is the handing down of the flame, not the worship of the ashes Gustav Mahler.
Posts: 8913 | From: Page 28 | Registered: May 2001
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Schroedinger's cat
Ship's cool cat
# 64
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Posted
Very good - and I did get every one. So I clearly am a geek.
Incidentally, #25, while it is very funny, is also a good example of why computer interpretation of language is so difficult.
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Blog
Music for your enjoyment
Lord may all my hard times be healing times
take out this broken heart and renew my mind.
Posts: 18859 | From: At the bottom of a deep dark well. | Registered: May 2001
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Curiosity killed ...
Ship's Mug
# 11770
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Posted
Jokes aren't funny if explained ... but I saw that list on Twitter when the Independent published it last month:
Heisenberg is a physicist - Heisenberg's uncertainty principle is the one that says you can't know the position and momentum of a particle, Gödel is a mathematician and logician, Chomsky is the only linguist.
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Mugs - Keep the Ship afloat
Posts: 13794 | From: outiside the outer ring road | Registered: Aug 2006
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QLib
Bad Example
# 43
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Posted
Re No.18 Yes, I get the first part - just don't think it's funny. Bit like the Mandelbrot one - ingenious, perhaps, but not very funny IMHO. Still, most of them were really good.
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Tradition is the handing down of the flame, not the worship of the ashes Gustav Mahler.
Posts: 8913 | From: Page 28 | Registered: May 2001
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Ariel
Shipmate
# 58
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Posted
I'm not sure I get 22 (the Mandelbrot one). But would vote for 5 as the funniest.
Posts: 25445 | Registered: May 2001
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Adam.
Like as the
# 4991
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Posted
There's been a robbery in a toilet factory. Police say they have nothing to go on.
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Ave Crux, Spes Unica!
Preaching blog
Posts: 8164 | From: Notre Dame, IN | Registered: Sep 2003
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Carex
Shipmate
# 9643
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Schroedinger's cat:
Incidentally, #25, while it is very funny, is also a good example of why computer interpretation of language is so difficult.
Yes, some of us think he should have come home with 13 loaves. I suspect it depends he did after picking up the first loaf - did he put it back down in the bread case (since he went out to "pick up" a loaf, but not necessarily to purchase it), or into his shopping basket.
Of course a proper Software Engineer would have had a requirements review beforehand...
Posts: 1425 | Registered: Jun 2005
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Schroedinger's cat
Ship's cool cat
# 64
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Posted
I've done work on less of a spec than that.
Ariel - Mandelbrot is famous for the Mandelbrot set and the images associated with that, which are identical at any magnification. So individual dots in the large pattern, when expanded, are the same as the original.
Like in that joke. Infinitely recursive.
Actually, I thought that was a very good one.
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Blog
Music for your enjoyment
Lord may all my hard times be healing times
take out this broken heart and renew my mind.
Posts: 18859 | From: At the bottom of a deep dark well. | Registered: May 2001
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Adrienne
Shipmate
# 2334
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Carex:
quote:
Originally posted by Schroedinger's cat:
Incidentally, #25, while it is very funny, is also a good example of why computer interpretation of language is so difficult.
Yes, some of us think he should have come home with 13 loaves. I suspect it depends he did after picking up the first loaf - did he put it back down in the bread case (since he went out to "pick up" a loaf, but not necessarily to purchase it), or into his shopping basket.
Yep, and others of us think the instructions should have been 'bring back a dozen', which I guess just goes to show quite a lot of us should get out more.
Posts: 977 | From: UK | Registered: Feb 2002
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Ariel
Shipmate
# 58
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Schroedinger's cat:
Ariel - Mandelbrot is famous for the Mandelbrot set and the images associated with that, which are identical at any magnification. So individual dots in the large pattern, when expanded, are the same as the original.
Like in that joke. Infinitely recursive.
Actually, I thought that was a very good one.
Thanks for that. I've played around with fractal generation packages, but always used a variety of filters to alter the recursions. After a while it just becomes habit and you forget that they're all much of a muchness.
Posts: 25445 | Registered: May 2001
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Sir Kevin
Ship's Gaffer
# 3492
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Posted
I'll read all of those Fringe jokes after I finish listening to Dame Judy Dench on 4Extra....
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If you board the wrong train, it is no use running along the corridor in the other direction Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Writing is currently my hobby, not yet my profession.
Posts: 30517 | From: White Hart Lane | Registered: Oct 2002
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Adam.
Like as the
# 4991
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Posted
There's been a robbery in a some kennels. Please see they have no leads.
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Ave Crux, Spes Unica!
Preaching blog
Posts: 8164 | From: Notre Dame, IN | Registered: Sep 2003
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Hedgehog
Ship's Shortstop
# 14125
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by georgiaboy:
Three ladies again (sorry!)
Three deaf ladies on a London bus:
First Lady: 'I say, is this Wembley?'
Second Lady: 'No, dear, it's Thursday.'
Third Lady: 'So am I. Let's get off this bus and find a pub.'
(First heard around 1960.)
Older than that. I heard it on a recording of a Jack Benny radio show from the 1940s. And I got the impression that it was considered an (ahem!) established joke then, since they got out more laughs by interrupting the joke as it was being told (with such lines like "No, it wasn't a bus, it was a train." "No, the train wasn't headed south, it was headed north--no, wait it was east, by George!" etc.) And, with all the interruptions, Benny doesn't immediately get the joke--resulting in him breaking into a silly laugh a few minutes later when he finally got it.
Now leaving for Anaheim, Azusa and Cuc.......................amonga!
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"We must regain the conviction that we need one another, that we have a shared responsibility for others and the world, and that being good and decent are worth it."--Pope Francis, Laudato Si'
Posts: 2740 | From: Delaware, USA | Registered: Sep 2008
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Pigwidgeon
Ship's Owl
# 10192
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Hedgehog:
quote:
Originally posted by georgiaboy:
Three ladies again (sorry!)
Three deaf ladies on a London bus:
First Lady: 'I say, is this Wembley?'
Second Lady: 'No, dear, it's Thursday.'
Third Lady: 'So am I. Let's get off this bus and find a pub.'
(First heard around 1960.)
Older than that. I heard it on a recording of a Jack Benny radio show from the 1940s. And I got the impression that it was considered an (ahem!) established joke then, since they got out more laughs by interrupting the joke as it was being told (with such lines like "No, it wasn't a bus, it was a train." "No, the train wasn't headed south, it was headed north--no, wait it was east, by George!" etc.) And, with all the interruptions, Benny doesn't immediately get the joke--resulting in him breaking into a silly laugh a few minutes later when he finally got it.
Now leaving for Anaheim, Azusa and Cuc.......................amonga!
ISTM that P.G. Wodehouse used it earlier than that.
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"...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe."
~Tortuf
Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005
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Spike
Mostly Harmless
# 36
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Posted
Q. What's yellow and smells of bananas?
A. Monkey sick
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"May you get to heaven before the devil knows you're dead" - Irish blessing
Posts: 12860 | From: The Valley of Crocuses | Registered: May 2001
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Enoch
Shipmate
# 14322
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Posted
I thought 25 and the Mandelbrot ones were good, but my favourite of these sort of jokes isn't in this list. It also doesn't really count as an antique joke as forty years ago no one would have known what it meant.
A woman is married to a string theorist. She comes home to to find her husband in bed with another woman. "But darling", he says, "I can explain everything".
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Brexit wrexit - Sir Graham Watson
Posts: 7610 | From: Bristol UK(was European Green Capital 2015, now Ljubljana) | Registered: Nov 2008
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Albertus
Shipmate
# 13356
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Lord Jestocost:
Not technically old jokes yet, but destined to become so, are this year's winners of the funniest lines from the fringe.
The overall winner:
quote:
"I heard a rumour that Cadbury is bringing out an oriental chocolate bar. Could be a Chinese Wispa."
I'd be happy with that as a bad joke thought up spontaneously in the pub, but I think I'd probably forget about it pretty soon afterwards. If that's really the funniest joke in the Fringe (and the 'same sex' one is the third funniest), Lord help the Fringe (or, more importantly, the unfortunate listener looking for comedy on BBC R4 in six months' time).
Posts: 6498 | From: Y Sowth | Registered: Jan 2008
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Gee D
Shipmate
# 13815
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Posted
Why did Gordon Killara? Because if he hadn't, Chatswood.
At least 120 years old and perhaps more.
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Not every Anglican in Sydney is Sydney Anglican
Posts: 7028 | From: Warrawee NSW Australia | Registered: Jun 2008
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Lothlorien
Ship's Grandma
# 4927
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Gee D:
Why did Gordon Killara? Because if he hadn't, Chatswood.
At least 120 years old and perhaps more.
The Cityrail attendant announcing trains had obviously not heard that one, Gee D.
He pronounced Killara with the accent on the first syllable and the rest of the word trailing off into oblivion. It sounded so odd that I did not immediately realise what he meant.
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Buy a bale. Help our Aussie rural communities and farmers. Another great cause needing support The High Country Patrol.
Posts: 9745 | From: girt by sea | Registered: Aug 2003
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The Rogue
Shipmate
# 2275
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Posted
Inspired by last week's Bake Off:
A man walked into an ironmongers and the shopkeeper said "did you know that you have custard in one ear and sponge cake in the other?" The man replied "You'll have to speak up - I'm a trifle deaf."
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If everyone starts thinking outside the box does outside the box come back inside?
Posts: 2507 | From: Toton | Registered: Feb 2002
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