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Source: (consider it)
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Thread: The Music of Hell
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L'organist
Shipmate
# 17338
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Posted
The Titanic song ties with I will always love you (ooooooooo) as trilled by Whitney Houston.
Much better when sung by the writer, Dolly Parton...
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Rara temporum felicitate ubi sentire quae velis et quae sentias dicere licet
Posts: 4950 | From: somewhere in England... | Registered: Sep 2012
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Beautiful Dreamer
Shipmate
# 10880
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by The Rhythm Methodist:
Personally, I'm with Sir Kevin: Rap music...and I use the word 'music' very loosely. I imagine the devil himself to be clad in a reversed baseball-cap, with his buttocks protruding from a half-mast pair of oversize clown's pantaloons. There'll be those absurd and slightly disturbing hand-gestures - somewhere on the cusp between affectation and affliction - as he mouths an endless stream of mindless doggerel, set to an electronic beat. If there is the smallest chance that Hell will be "rap music central", then there is all the more reason to be grateful to Christ.
I don't know...I find that stuff to be so ridiculous that it makes me laugh my ass off. Maybe seeing it all the time won't be so funny, though.
I once had a dream that I was in a Hell that looked just like my high school and played nothing but "Smells Like Teen Spirit" and "Rumpshaker" over and over and over again. Ugh.
I suppose I'm dating myself by saying this, but this was the stuff that was popular when I started high school. God help me. ![[Smile]](smile.gif)
The5thMary and other US mates might know this...remember the "FreeCreditReport.Com" commericals? I suspect they're so annoying that we could torture *Satan* by playing them.
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More where that came from
Now go away, or I shall taunt you a second time!
Posts: 6028 | From: Outside Atlanta, GA | Registered: Jan 2006
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roybart
Shipmate
# 17357
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Kitten:
Dreary hymns from the 18th & 19th centuries
Indeed. That period of English church music is a low point, both as to versifying and tune-fabrication.
To this, I'd add all musical forms with the prefix "techno" in their title.
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"The consolations of the imaginary are not imaginary consolations."
-- Roger Scruton
Posts: 547 | From: here | Registered: Sep 2012
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L'organist
Shipmate
# 17338
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Posted
What utter cobblers, roybart:
The 18th and 19th centuries only suffer such judgement through being compared with the riches of the 17th century - and also with being compared with Handel, who was not even English, however much he worked here.
The 18th century can boast Greene, Clarke, Croft and Boyce. You are denying the good work of Attwood, Stainer, Wesley, Stanford et al.
Frankly, if you're looking for a period of dearth in composition for the English church, you only have to go back to the last century, particularly the last part of it: take out a few figures such as Howells, Britten and Rutter (!) and you're not left with much.
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Rara temporum felicitate ubi sentire quae velis et quae sentias dicere licet
Posts: 4950 | From: somewhere in England... | Registered: Sep 2012
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roybart
Shipmate
# 17357
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by L'organist:
What utter cobblers, roybart:
The 18th and 19th centuries only suffer such judgement through being compared with the riches of the 17th century - and also with being compared with Handel, who was not even English, however much he worked here.
The 18th century can boast Greene, Clarke, Croft and Boyce. You are denying the good work of Attwood, Stainer, Wesley, Stanford et al.
Frankly, if you're looking for a period of dearth in composition for the English church, you only have to go back to the last century, particularly the last part of it: take out a few figures such as Howells, Britten and Rutter (!) and you're not left with much.
I can see that, depending on where one has come from, my lack of conventional taste in hymns might seem "cobblers" to someone else with a very different background. I don't have a Hymnal at hand, but will definitely recheck the hymns you refer to, and give them a respectful try in private.
In retrospect, I think I should have referred to the "late 18th century" as my starting point, rather than the entire century.
I should also say that I grew up in a non-church-going family, and began formal worship in the RCCh before the Vatican Council. The congregation did not sing, except for a few carols at Christmas time. Almost everything (at least as I remember it) was in Latin.
This means that I have no positive childhood memories of, or emotional ties to, congregational hymn-singing in English. It's a limitation I have never been able to overcome. I sometimes envy the people around me who know and love these hymns and sing them with gusto.
[ 26. September 2013, 16:53: Message edited by: roybart ]
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"The consolations of the imaginary are not imaginary consolations."
-- Roger Scruton
Posts: 547 | From: here | Registered: Sep 2012
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The5thMary
Shipmate
# 12953
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Posted
Beautiful Dreamer: The freecreditreport.com commercials ARE annoying but I found something even worse: "The J.D. Wentworth Cash Now" commercials could cause Satan AND Jesus severe mental anguish! That damn song will just play in your head for days! ![[Waterworks]](graemlins/bawling.gif)
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God gave me my face but She let me pick my nose.
Posts: 3451 | From: Tacoma, WA USA | Registered: Aug 2007
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Sir Kevin
Ship's Gaffer
# 3492
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by L'organist:
Frankly, if you're looking for a period of dearth in composition for the English church, you only have to go back to the last century, particularly the last part of it: take out a few figures such as Howells, Britten and Rutter (!) and you're not left with much.
We like Rutter and some Britten: we've sung it in church and my wife sung it at university.
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If you board the wrong train, it is no use running along the corridor in the other direction Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Writing is currently my hobby, not yet my profession.
Posts: 30517 | From: White Hart Lane | Registered: Oct 2002
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L'organist
Shipmate
# 17338
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Posted
Don't get me wrong, I'm not knocking all Rutter.
In my neck of the rural woods the thing he wrote for an anniversary for the CPRE, Look at the world, goes down a storm at harvest.
Otherwise, its falls back to either The heavens are telling or similar.
On the other hand, if you want your congregation of non-regulars to suffer, there's a particularly grim little oeuvre from Sidney Nicholson, Let us with a gladsome mind, that does the job perfectly ...
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Rara temporum felicitate ubi sentire quae velis et quae sentias dicere licet
Posts: 4950 | From: somewhere in England... | Registered: Sep 2012
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Chorister
Completely Frocked
# 473
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Posted
We tolerate Rutter because it gives the organist a chance to play all the twiddly bits - which he so loves - on the piano. He loves playing the organ most of the time, as long as we occasionally let him indulge his twiddle.
What he hates most is Victorian music. Which is tricky as it has comprised a large part of our repertoire up to now.
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Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.
Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by The5thMary:
"The J.D. Wentworth Cash Now" commercials could cause Satan AND Jesus severe mental anguish!
Au contraire! The Wagnerian parody ranks among the classics of commercial creativity.
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"I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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Eigon
Shipmate
# 4917
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Posted
I think I heard some of the Music of Hell today - there was a string trio in the corner of the hall at the event I went to (greeting visitors to our town from Timbuktu) and no-one was quite sure whether they were tuning up or just atonal. Goodness knows what the Malians thought!
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Laugh hard. Run fast. Be kind.
Posts: 3710 | From: Hay-on-Wye, town of books | Registered: Aug 2003
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Chorister
Completely Frocked
# 473
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Posted
Sadly, I heard the Music of Hell to day at the wedding where we were singing. We didn't do too well. It happens sometimes.... ![[Hot and Hormonal]](icon_redface.gif)
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Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.
Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001
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Piglet
Islander
# 11803
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Chorister:
... as long as we occasionally let him indulge his twiddle ...
Best way to keep him happy ... ![[Snigger]](graemlins/snigger.gif)
I confess a little Rutter goes a very long way with me - no more than one carol (preferably the Shepherd's Pie) in the Nine Lessons - but I was at a funeral the other day where my boss's daughter (who's 12) sang The Lord bless you and keep you so beautifully it made the hairs on the back of my neck stand up.
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I may not be on an island any more, but I'm still an islander.
alto n a soprano who can read music
Posts: 20272 | From: Fredericton, NB, on a rather larger piece of rock | Registered: Sep 2006
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David
Complete Bastard
# 3
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Posted
In one of the early missions in Splinter Cell - Blacklist you have to make your way through a darkened shopping mall populated by terrorists with torches and machine guns. If, like me, you prefer to take your Splinter Cell with the utmost stealth, this part of the mission can take an extended period of time.
An extended period of time during which there is a Christmassy song playing on continuous loop over the shop PA called "The Loveliest Tree in the Valley".
That.
And K-Pop.
Posts: 3815 | From: Redneck Wonderland | Registered: Mar 2001
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The5thMary
Shipmate
# 12953
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Amanda B. Reckondwythe:
quote:
Originally posted by The5thMary:
"The J.D. Wentworth Cash Now" commercials could cause Satan AND Jesus severe mental anguish!
Au contraire! The Wagnerian parody ranks among the classics of commercial creativity.
Sorry, old boy, but that damn song gets in my head for days and days until I want to kill myself. It is funny but it's a terrible earworm to have in your head.
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God gave me my face but She let me pick my nose.
Posts: 3451 | From: Tacoma, WA USA | Registered: Aug 2007
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The5thMary
Shipmate
# 12953
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Posted
Satan would get a real kick out of this one: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7-NOZU2iPA8
I know I mentioned it in Crappy Choruses but, really, everyone should have to experience it at least once. ![[Devil]](graemlins/devil.gif)
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God gave me my face but She let me pick my nose.
Posts: 3451 | From: Tacoma, WA USA | Registered: Aug 2007
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Mockingale
Shipmate
# 16599
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Posted
I suspect that Hell involves a Taize chant that has gone on about 6000 years too long. Or maybe "Christian pop."
Posts: 679 | From: Connectilando | Registered: Aug 2011
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L'organist
Shipmate
# 17338
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Posted
"Christian Pop" - one of the teen sons has a new conspiracy theory that goes something this:
Christian Pop is, in fact, the music of the devil to see just how many gullible believers can be traduced into thinking it either of merit or something that will attract new converts.
As son said - Christian Pop is proof not only of hell but of hell on earth... ![[Two face]](graemlins/scot_twoface.gif)
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Rara temporum felicitate ubi sentire quae velis et quae sentias dicere licet
Posts: 4950 | From: somewhere in England... | Registered: Sep 2012
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Sir Kevin
Ship's Gaffer
# 3492
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Posted
Christian Heavy Metal is much preferable, though it may no longer exist...
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If you board the wrong train, it is no use running along the corridor in the other direction Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Writing is currently my hobby, not yet my profession.
Posts: 30517 | From: White Hart Lane | Registered: Oct 2002
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Nanny Ogg
Ship's cushion
# 1176
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Posted
The music that would be hellish punishment for my sins is death metal, anything in the 12 tone technique, free or avant-garde jazz and rap, particularly the gangsta variety.
Think I'll repent now to save my ear drums.
* Forgot to add St Winifred's School choir and other child "stars" *
[ 04. October 2013, 12:40: Message edited by: Nanny Ogg ]
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Buy me a beer and I'm you friend forever
Posts: 4137 | From: Away with the fairies | Registered: Aug 2001
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jedijudy
Organist of the Jedi Temple
# 333
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Posted
![[Disappointed]](graemlins/disappointed.gif)
L'organist, you DO know that the hosts have to listen to the links, don't you? What did we ever do to you?
![[Biased]](wink.gif)
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Jasmine, little cat with a big heart.
Posts: 18017 | From: 'Twixt the 'Glades and the Gulf | Registered: Aug 2001
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L'organist
Shipmate
# 17338
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Posted
Sorry.
On the other hand, if want the ultimate Christmas present for the office pretentious nerd, buy then The Unbelievable glory of the Human Voice by the same Mrs Foster Jenkins - it'll blow their mind. ![[Killing me]](graemlins/killingme.gif)
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Rara temporum felicitate ubi sentire quae velis et quae sentias dicere licet
Posts: 4950 | From: somewhere in England... | Registered: Sep 2012
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Galloping Granny
Shipmate
# 13814
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by The5thMary:
Satan would get a real kick out of this one: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7-NOZU2iPA8
I know I mentioned it in Crappy Choruses but, really, everyone should have to experience it at least once.
![[Projectile]](graemlins/puke2.gif)
GG
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The Kingdom of Heaven is spread upon the earth, and men do not see it. Gospel of Thomas, 113
Posts: 2629 | From: Matarangi | Registered: Jun 2008
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Mudfrog
Shipmate
# 8116
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Posted
Jazz.
Nothing to add.
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"The point of having an open mind, like having an open mouth, is to close it on something solid."
G.K. Chesterton
Posts: 8237 | From: North Yorkshire, UK | Registered: Jul 2004
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Stercus Tauri
Shipmate
# 16668
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Posted
A certain presbyterian (PCUSA) church in the middle of New York State. Their organist can murder any good hymn that you thought you knew and loved, and the croaking rabble that wears gowns and calls itself a choir will jump up and down on its corpse. The only thing that choir and organist have in common is that they all go to church at about the same time. They have nothing to do with each other during the service. That's music for hell.
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Thay haif said. Quhat say thay, Lat thame say (George Keith, 5th Earl Marischal)
Posts: 905 | From: On the traditional lands of the Six Nations. | Registered: Sep 2011
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The5thMary
Shipmate
# 12953
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Mudfrog:
Jazz.
Nothing to add.
WHAT?! Not ALL Jazz is the same. Are you seriously saying that every little bit of Jazz music is Hellish? Wow.
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God gave me my face but She let me pick my nose.
Posts: 3451 | From: Tacoma, WA USA | Registered: Aug 2007
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Miss Madrigal
Shipmate
# 15528
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Posted
I have a strong suspicion that Graham Kendrick's oeuvre will feature heavily.
Posts: 79 | From: The Bit In The Middle | Registered: Mar 2010
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roybart
Shipmate
# 17357
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Welease Woderwick:
Have you ever thought of what music will be played in Hell to make your suffering even worse?
Whatever it is, it will be off-pitch. Jenkins gives us what amounts to a master class in every possible variation of this phenomenon. (Thanks, l'organist, for that link. And what more appropriate visual accompaniment for the Music of Hell than photos of cats with cute captions?)
[ 06. October 2013, 21:06: Message edited by: roybart ]
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"The consolations of the imaginary are not imaginary consolations."
-- Roger Scruton
Posts: 547 | From: here | Registered: Sep 2012
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Starbug
Shipmate
# 15917
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Posted
Not just off-pitch, but badly tuned in, like a radio that isn't quite set to the station.
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“Oh the pointing again. They're screwdrivers! What are you going to do? Assemble a cabinet at them?” ― The Day of the Doctor
Posts: 1189 | From: West of the New Forest | Registered: Sep 2010
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