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Source: (consider it)
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Thread: Heaven: Drinking rules in Hell, and other formalities
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jlg
What is this place?
Why am I here?
# 98
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by beachlass:
Anytime a newcomer with a post count lower than 5 starts a thread take a drink.
If they start a thread in Hell, take an additional two drinks.
Posts: 17391 | From: Just a Town, New Hampshire, USA | Registered: May 2001
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Hiro's Leap
Shipmate
# 12470
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Posted
When someone makes a grammar/spelling mistake, take a drink. Then write a post to kindly point it out.
The next day, when you notice the sadly ironic grammar/spelling mistakes in ALL your drunken posts, take a painkiller.
Posts: 3418 | From: UK, OK | Registered: Mar 2007
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Mamacita
Lakefront liberal
# 3659
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Posted
If you see botched UBB code from someone with less than 100 posts, take a drink. If it's from someone with over 100 posts, take two. Unless you're a host on that board, in which case you can drain your glass.
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Do not be daunted by the enormity of the world’s grief. Do justly, now. Love mercy, now. Walk humbly, now. You are not obligated to complete the work, but neither are you free to abandon it.
Posts: 20761 | From: where the purple line ends | Registered: Dec 2002
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Campbellite
Ut unum sint
# 1202
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Mamacita:
If you see botched UBB code from someone with less than 100 posts, take a drink. If it's from someone with over 100 posts, take two. Unless you're a host on that board, in which case you can drain your glass.
If the botched code is by a fellow host, correct it, and then mock them unmercifully in your [ETA: ]
Making damn sure you don't botch your own code. ![[Roll Eyes]](rolleyes.gif)
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I upped mine. Up yours.
Suffering for Jesus since 1966.
WTFWED?
Posts: 12001 | From: between keyboard and chair | Registered: Aug 2001
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Rosa Winkel
Saint Anger round my neck
# 11424
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Jon J:
quote:
Originally posted by Liverpool fan:
quote:
Originally posted by Jon J:
Every time you check a shipmate's profile and they have hilariously reinterpreted the question 'Favourite Boards' - take a stiff one.
But remember to take a drink afterwards.
ITTWACWS
What does that mean?
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The Disability and Jesus "Locked out for Lent" project
Posts: 3271 | From: Wrocław | Registered: May 2006
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RooK
1 of 6
# 1852
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Liverpool fan:
What does that mean?
I means you should bend your elbow.
Posts: 15274 | From: Portland, Oregon, USA, Earth | Registered: Nov 2001
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Jack o' the Green
Shipmate
# 11091
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Liverpool fan:
quote:
Originally posted by Jon J:
quote:
Originally posted by Liverpool fan:
quote:
Originally posted by Jon J:
Every time you check a shipmate's profile and they have hilariously reinterpreted the question 'Favourite Boards' - take a stiff one.
But remember to take a drink afterwards.
ITTWACWS
What does that mean?
It means you should have a stiff one on me.
Posts: 3121 | From: Lancashire, England | Registered: Feb 2006
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Beautiful Dreamer
Shipmate
# 10880
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Posted
Every time someone tries to make a joke but it completely bombs, take a drink.
Every time someone talks crap about someone else and then gets upset when that person calls them on it, take two drinks.
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More where that came from
Now go away, or I shall taunt you a second time!
Posts: 6028 | From: Outside Atlanta, GA | Registered: Jan 2006
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Moo
Ship's tough old bird
# 107
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Liverpool fan:
quote:
Originally posted by Jon J:
quote:
Originally posted by Liverpool fan:
quote:
Originally posted by Jon J:
Every time you check a shipmate's profile and they have hilariously reinterpreted the question 'Favourite Boards' - take a stiff one.
But remember to take a drink afterwards.
ITTWACWS
What does that mean?
There is a thread in the Styx that answers your question.
Moo
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Kerygmania host
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See you later, alligator.
Posts: 20365 | From: Alleghany Mountains of Virginia | Registered: May 2001
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Kelly Alves
Bunny with an axe
# 2522
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Posted
Every time somebody uses the phrase tu quoque, balance your glass on top of your head, shout "DO AS I SAY, NOT AS I DO!", and drain the glass.
Every time somebody uses a ![[Biased]](wink.gif) or a ![[Razz]](tongue.gif) to mollify a truly foul insult, take a drink and tell everyone in the room you didn't.
[ 06. January 2008, 00:03: Message edited by: Kelly Alves ]
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I cannot expect people to believe “
Jesus loves me, this I know” of they don’t believe “Kelly loves me, this I know.”
Kelly Alves, somewhere around 2003.
Posts: 35076 | From: Pura Californiana | Registered: Mar 2002
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Beautiful Dreamer
Shipmate
# 10880
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Posted
Every time you see the person who thinks they know everything get something wrong, take a drink.
If they actually admit to being wrong, break out your snowblower. Hell has frozen over.
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More where that came from
Now go away, or I shall taunt you a second time!
Posts: 6028 | From: Outside Atlanta, GA | Registered: Jan 2006
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Zwingli
Shipmate
# 4438
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by The Wanderer:
Everytime someone in Purgatory mentions Calvinism take a drink. (Things will begin to make sense then )
Every time someone uses "Calvinist" to mean "a conservative evangelical whom I don't happen to like" take a drink. Every time that uses it of someone who in't really a Calvinist at all, eg. most Sydney Anglicans, take two drinks, have a lie down and refrain from putting your fist through the monitor.
[ 06. January 2008, 11:45: Message edited by: Zwingli ]
Posts: 4283 | Registered: Apr 2003
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Robert Armin
All licens'd fool
# 182
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Posted
OK - my comment was meant to raise a smile, rather than to cause offence. Clearly I got that wrong. I apologise.
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Keeping fit was an obsession with Fr Moity .... He did chin ups in the vestry, calisthenics in the pulpit, and had developed a series of Tai-Chi exercises to correspond with ritual movements of the Mass. The Antipope Robert Rankin
Posts: 8927 | From: In the pack | Registered: May 2001
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Jengie jon
Semper Reformanda
# 273
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by The Wanderer:
Everytime someone in Purgatory mentions Calvinism take a drink. (Things will begin to make sense then )
I think Calvin would approve. One of his conditions of settlement in Geneva was a good cellar of wine.
Jengie
p.s. he was trying not to have to accept the post.
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"To violate a persons ability to distinguish fact from fantasy is the epistemological equivalent of rape." Noretta Koertge
Back to my blog
Posts: 20894 | From: city of steel, butterflies and rainbows | Registered: May 2001
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sabine
Shipmate
# 3861
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Posted
Hmmmm.....it would be fun to see all of you sliding off your chairs and staggering around after taking those drinks.
All I would have to do is use all the phrases and smilies mentioned on this thread--all of them! If I had time, I could do it all in one post, and then we'd have to have a belly-up meet!
Bwahahahaha! ![[Devil]](graemlins/devil.gif) (what, no drinks for the devil smiley??)
love and kisses ![[Axe murder]](graemlins/lovedrops.gif)
...and don't take the diazepam!
sabine
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"Hunger looks like the man that hunger is killing." Eduardo Galeano
Posts: 5887 | From: the US Heartland | Registered: Dec 2002
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comet
Snowball in Hell
# 10353
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Posted
quote:
Originally post by The Wanderer:
OK - my comment was meant to raise a smile, rather than to cause offence. Clearly I got that wrong. I apologise.
quote:
Originally posted by Beautiful_Dreamer:
Every time someone tries to make a joke but it completely bombs, take a drink.
Bottoms up!
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Evil Dragon Lady, Breaker of Men's Constitutions
"It's hard to be religious when certain people are never incinerated by bolts of lightning.” -Calvin
Posts: 17024 | From: halfway between Seduction and Peril | Registered: Sep 2005
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RooK
1 of 6
# 1852
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Posted
I thought of one that's a few years out of date...
- If Mousethief hands you a Mousethief Cooler, take a drink. (Duh)
Posts: 15274 | From: Portland, Oregon, USA, Earth | Registered: Nov 2001
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Spike
Mostly Harmless
# 36
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by The Wanderer:
OK - my comment was meant to raise a smile, rather than to cause offence. Clearly I got that wrong. I apologise.
Well, it made me laugh if that's any consolation.
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"May you get to heaven before the devil knows you're dead" - Irish blessing
Posts: 12860 | From: The Valley of Crocuses | Registered: May 2001
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Robert Armin
All licens'd fool
# 182
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Posted
Thank you. The comment was supposed to be a reference to the complexity of Calvinistic thought. At least, I find it complex, but YMMV. Clearly my "thread cred" isn't as high as I thought it was.
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Keeping fit was an obsession with Fr Moity .... He did chin ups in the vestry, calisthenics in the pulpit, and had developed a series of Tai-Chi exercises to correspond with ritual movements of the Mass. The Antipope Robert Rankin
Posts: 8927 | From: In the pack | Registered: May 2001
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balaam
Making an ass of myself
# 4543
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Jon J:
Every time you check a shipmate's profile and they have hilariously reinterpreted the question 'Favourite Boards' - take a stiff one.
Hey, I resemble that remark.
If the bottom line of the profile reads Profile last updated by Erin take two drinks, with a chaser.
If the profile was last updated by Simon, drain both bottles.
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Last ever sig ...
blog
Posts: 9049 | From: Hen Ogledd | Registered: May 2003
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Kelly Alves
Bunny with an axe
# 2522
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Posted
Ok, two more for Hell:
If several people completely depart from the Op for two or three pages to discuss what Hell is for, how to navigate Hell, or what makes the Hellions cooler than any other shipmates, take three very large swigs of your favorite laxative.
If someone tells somebody else to "stay out of the kitchen if you can't stand the heat" and then later gets inordinately offended over something really stupid, (or vice-versa), take a big mouthful then spit it right back in your glass.
(Circus)
if somebody gets genuinely offended on the Offended thread (hey, it's happened), take a drink of a Shirley Temple.
(Heaven)
If someone (for instance) hops onto a "favorite book/ movie" thread with no other contribution than "your favorite book/ movie sucks", take a drink of Zima. And like it.
All boards:
Every time shipmates discuss a hostly action on the thread itself rather than taking it to the Styx, send that host a bottle of their favorite libation. (sorry, pet peeve of mine.) ![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
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I cannot expect people to believe “
Jesus loves me, this I know” of they don’t believe “Kelly loves me, this I know.”
Kelly Alves, somewhere around 2003.
Posts: 35076 | From: Pura Californiana | Registered: Mar 2002
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Beautiful Dreamer
Shipmate
# 10880
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Posted
(Circus)
If someone posts on a 'quote thread' using a movie/song/book quote that no normal person would have heard of, take a drink.
If someone actually guesses one of these obscure references correctly, take two drinks.
If someone quotes a book/song/movie and attributes the quote to the wrong person or misquotes, take a drink. Take two drinks if they argue when they are corrected.
(Hell)
When someone personally insults you and only succeeds in making themselves look like an ass, drain your bottle.
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More where that came from
Now go away, or I shall taunt you a second time!
Posts: 6028 | From: Outside Atlanta, GA | Registered: Jan 2006
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Spike
Mostly Harmless
# 36
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Posted
Whenever a newbie starts a Styx thread asking why a board such as Hell is necessary on a Christian website, take 3 drinks and, while you're at it, post a Hell call against that poster.
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"May you get to heaven before the devil knows you're dead" - Irish blessing
Posts: 12860 | From: The Valley of Crocuses | Registered: May 2001
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jedijudy
Organist of the Jedi Temple
# 333
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Posted
When someone quotes a post and adds "What he/she said", take a drink.
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Jasmine, little cat with a big heart.
Posts: 18017 | From: 'Twixt the 'Glades and the Gulf | Registered: Aug 2001
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Alfred E. Neuman
What? Me worry?
# 6855
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Spike:
... and, while you're at it, post a Hell call against that poster.
More rewarding to run through the fields naked at midnight while howling at the moon.
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--Formerly: Gort--
Posts: 12954 | Registered: May 2004
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WatersOfBabylon
Shipmate
# 11893
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Posted
When IngoB and MadGeo start duking it out over the true nature Buddhism, just grab the whole bottle. You're gonna' be here for a while.
Posts: 515 | From: I'm a nomad. | Registered: Oct 2006
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RooK
1 of 6
# 1852
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Posted
In Hell:- If a newbie issues a new battle cry (It's WAR WITH NO RULES!), get out the beer bong - it's time to funnel-chug.
Posts: 15274 | From: Portland, Oregon, USA, Earth | Registered: Nov 2001
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Sioni Sais
Shipmate
# 5713
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Posted
Whenever:
- Someone confuses SoF with real life
- Someone doesn't realise that SoF can play a part in real life
have a drink.
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"He isn't Doctor Who, he's The Doctor"
(Paul Sinha, BBC)
Posts: 24276 | From: Newport, Wales | Registered: Apr 2004
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Zwingli
Shipmate
# 4438
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by The Wanderer:
OK - my comment was meant to raise a smile, rather than to cause offence. Clearly I got that wrong. I apologise.
The Wanderer - I took no offense, and I'm sorry that it came off that I did, I found your post humerous. Calvinism makes all our heads spin occasionally, as do many other -isms; I just don't like it used as an insult especially when misapplied, which is not what you were doing.
Jengie Jon - if Calvin is mentioned, take a glass of wine.
- if Luther is mentioned, grab a beer.
- if Zwingli is mentioned, buy Zwingli a beer.
Posts: 4283 | Registered: Apr 2003
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Sioni Sais
Shipmate
# 5713
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Posted
If someone claims that "this is a lame Hell thread/call" have a drink. If they claim that this is the lamest ever, have three. If someone requests a new TICTH thread, buy a host a drink.
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"He isn't Doctor Who, he's The Doctor"
(Paul Sinha, BBC)
Posts: 24276 | From: Newport, Wales | Registered: Apr 2004
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Kelly Alves
Bunny with an axe
# 2522
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Zwingli:
if Zwingli is mentioned, buy Zwingli a beer.
Zwingli, Zwingli, Zwingli, Zwingli, Zwingli.
There, that oughta keep you on the floor for a few days.
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I cannot expect people to believe “
Jesus loves me, this I know” of they don’t believe “Kelly loves me, this I know.”
Kelly Alves, somewhere around 2003.
Posts: 35076 | From: Pura Californiana | Registered: Mar 2002
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Jack o' the Green
Shipmate
# 11091
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by WatersOfBabylon:
When IngoB and MadGeo start duking it out over the true nature Buddhism, just grab the whole bottle. You're gonna' be here for a while.
Very True.
![[Killing me]](graemlins/killingme.gif)
Posts: 3121 | From: Lancashire, England | Registered: Feb 2006
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Sober Preacher's Kid
Presbymethegationalist
# 12699
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Posted
For Purg:
Whenever one of the Orthodoxen assert they are the One True Church and the West is fallen/heretical/has cooties, take a shot of Ouzo or Vodka, depending on the source. This may require two shots.
If one of the Roman Catholics mentions they are the One True Church, down some Marsala or Port.
If one of the Anglicans asserts they are the One True Church, drink a shot of Gin.
If one of the Reformed says they are the One True Church, down a shot of whisky. No water, that's cheating. It's full Presbyterian Fire for you.
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NDP Federal Convention Ottawa 2018: A random assortment of Prots and Trots.
Posts: 7646 | From: Peterborough, Upper Canada | Registered: Jun 2007
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beachpsalms
Shipmate
# 4979
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Posted
If someone from the United Church of Canada asserts that THEY are the One True Church, ask what they have been drinking, (or smoking) and if they are going to share.
After you've picked yourself up off the floor, and controlled the hysterical laughter, that is.
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"You willing to die for that belief?"
"I am. 'Course, that ain't exactly Plan A."
Posts: 826 | From: a hamster's cheek-pouch full of raisins | Registered: Sep 2003
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Sober Preacher's Kid
Presbymethegationalist
# 12699
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Posted
All right, all right, I 'fess up. I said the United Church was the One True Church.
It was drinking Bacardi 8 on the rocks. Want shome, I'ff shtill got haff a bottle left. <hiccup>
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NDP Federal Convention Ottawa 2018: A random assortment of Prots and Trots.
Posts: 7646 | From: Peterborough, Upper Canada | Registered: Jun 2007
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Beautiful Dreamer
Shipmate
# 10880
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Posted
When you see someone accuse someone else of doing something, and then they do that thing themselves, take a drink.
If they try to justify why it is okay for them to do X but not for the other person, take two drinks.
Drain your bottle if they actually manage to convince anyone or sound coherent.
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More where that came from
Now go away, or I shall taunt you a second time!
Posts: 6028 | From: Outside Atlanta, GA | Registered: Jan 2006
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beachpsalms
Shipmate
# 4979
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Posted
Whenever someone interrupts the current conversational thread to hurl incoherent insults and demand that a host close the thread because it isn't to their taste: drink.
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"You willing to die for that belief?"
"I am. 'Course, that ain't exactly Plan A."
Posts: 826 | From: a hamster's cheek-pouch full of raisins | Registered: Sep 2003
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jlg
What is this place?
Why am I here?
# 98
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Posted
Aw, did someone step on your precious little toes somewhere? Poor baby.
Posts: 17391 | From: Just a Town, New Hampshire, USA | Registered: May 2001
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Mamacita
Lakefront liberal
# 3659
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by beachlass:
Whenever someone interrupts the current conversational thread to hurl incoherent insults and demand that a host close the thread because it isn't to their taste: drink.
If it's any comfort, beachlass, rest assured that hosts generally look at such posts, lift their glass, and say, "Not on your life, sweetheart."
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Do not be daunted by the enormity of the world’s grief. Do justly, now. Love mercy, now. Walk humbly, now. You are not obligated to complete the work, but neither are you free to abandon it.
Posts: 20761 | From: where the purple line ends | Registered: Dec 2002
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Beautiful Dreamer
Shipmate
# 10880
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Posted
When you read the post of someone you can't stand and actually find yourself agreeing, take a drink.
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More where that came from
Now go away, or I shall taunt you a second time!
Posts: 6028 | From: Outside Atlanta, GA | Registered: Jan 2006
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Marvin the Martian
Interplanetary
# 4360
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by jedijudy:
When someone quotes a post and adds "What he/she said", take a drink.
What she said.
:glug:
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Hail Gallaxhar
Posts: 30100 | From: Adrift on a sea of surreality | Registered: Apr 2003
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The Weeder
Shipmate
# 11321
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Marvin the Martian:
quote:
Originally posted by jedijudy:
When someone quotes a post and adds "What he/she said", take a drink.
What she said.
:glug:
What they both said....empty the bottle
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Still missing the gator
Posts: 2542 | From: LaLa Land | Registered: Apr 2006
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Eleanor Jane
Shipmate
# 13102
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Posted
Hmm... good idea. I think it's wine o'clock.
(and I don't even need an excuse!)
EJ
Posts: 556 | From: Now in the UK! | Registered: Oct 2007
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Kelly Alves
Bunny with an axe
# 2522
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Posted
(Because this just happened...)
Circus, SOF Quotes File:
Take two drinks every time somebody complains that another shipmate already logged the quote they were about to post.
(Oh, and on a similar note:)
Anywhere on the Ship: two drinks for a double post, three drinks for a triple post, etc.
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I cannot expect people to believe “
Jesus loves me, this I know” of they don’t believe “Kelly loves me, this I know.”
Kelly Alves, somewhere around 2003.
Posts: 35076 | From: Pura Californiana | Registered: Mar 2002
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The Rogue
Shipmate
# 2275
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Posted
Whenever anyone resurrects a thread in Heaven which was very amusing but has run its course ages ago ... take a drink.
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If everyone starts thinking outside the box does outside the box come back inside?
Posts: 2507 | From: Toton | Registered: Feb 2002
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Beautiful Dreamer
Shipmate
# 10880
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Posted
Whenever anyone changes the subject to avoid answering a direct question, take a drink.
Whenever someone posts something that has nothing to do with the thread at hand but is still funny, take a drink.
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More where that came from
Now go away, or I shall taunt you a second time!
Posts: 6028 | From: Outside Atlanta, GA | Registered: Jan 2006
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Chorister
Completely Frocked
# 473
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Posted
Whenever anyone refers to this thread in another thread: take a drink.
In fact, take two and offer the other one to the drunken sailor.
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Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.
Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001
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Organ Builder
Shipmate
# 12478
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Posted
Choose a thread you haven't been following, but is on its third page or more. Click to the last post. Unless it has a remote connection with the thread title, take a drink.
(Use carefully: alcohol poisoning can easily result).
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How desperately difficult it is to be honest with oneself. It is much easier to be honest with other people.--E.F. Benson
Posts: 3337 | From: ...somewhere in between 40 and death... | Registered: Mar 2007
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