|
Source: (consider it)
|
Thread: Scene 3: The Wise Men Discover the Star
|
Wise Guy
Nativity Play
# 3707
|
Posted
(Wise guy ditches moth eaten robe to reveal leather motorcycling gear. Dumb Lap dancers wheel in a gorgeous Harley, on which he climbs. 'Born to be Wild" begins to play.)
WHO'S IN? WE'RE HEADING WEST!
--------------------
KELLY ALVES makes a flip remark and ends up in a play. Hi, Mom!
Posts: 205 | From: Second star to the right | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Chief Comic Shepherd
Nativity Play
# 3660
|
Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Fairy Godmother:
quote:
Originally posted by Chief Comic Shepherd:
They serve Old Peculiar, which should suit you lot fine. But no sheep.
Now someone's talking....
Good grief, woman - aren't your mulitudinous hip-flasks enough? Or are they just an excuse to show us your drawers? Hussy!
--------------------
I be also known as Moth!
Posts: 137 | From: Near Bethlehem | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Rudolph the Red-Nosed Sheep
Nativity Play
# 3667
|
Posted
Rudolph resolves to keep a close eye on these wise guys. Making sure no sneaks up behind him. ![[Paranoid]](graemlins/paranoid.gif)
--------------------
I may be just a purple sheep with a funny nose, but ThatsMrJuice 2U!
Posts: 110 | From: The Sheep Shed | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Wise Guy
Nativity Play
# 3707
|
Posted
(Wise Guy kills engine.)
No sheep?
--------------------
KELLY ALVES makes a flip remark and ends up in a play. Hi, Mom!
Posts: 205 | From: Second star to the right | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Tour Manager
Nativity Play
# 3670
|
Posted
Right you are then. Here are your tickets. (Hands out several brightly coloured pieces of cardboard of an indeterminate number which is later found to be inferior to the number of persons, sheep, etc to be carried).
This is a point-to-point no-win no-fee no-deposit no-return one-way ticket. You will actually be taken to a field some 40 miles from your ultimate destination which can be reached from there by speedy shuttle camel - prices on arrangement with local operators. Departure is at 12 noon GMT tomorrow. Bon voyage!
(Grabs credit card from nearest cast member and disappears off to the Magic Tour Bus for the night)
--------------------
Let's get this show on the roaaaaaaaaaaaa- *boink* (Eutychus)
Posts: 46 | From: Magic Tour Bus | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Chief Wise Man
Nativity Play
# 3674
|
Posted
But WAIT, There's MORE!
We can't go without bringin' gifts. Anybody got suggestions?
--------------------
incurablyGeeking westwardly; avatar following yonder star.
Posts: 87 | From: East of Yerushalayem; Ur mebbe... | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Herod
Nativity Play
# 3649
|
Posted
I made a few suggestions earlier...
--------------------
#I'm Herod the Great, I am, I am.#
Stoo
Posts: 159 | From: Palestine | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Fairy Godmother
Nativity Play
# 3695
|
Posted
I'd say a trip to Mothercare would be in order
--------------------
It could only be Nanny Ogg
Posts: 265 | From: Appearing in a pantomime near you | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Wise Guy
Nativity Play
# 3707
|
Posted
(fumbles around in pockets and produces sizeble plastic bag of greenish, herbal looking stuff.)
I've got, uhh. Incensce! That's it! From..Frank.
--------------------
KELLY ALVES makes a flip remark and ends up in a play. Hi, Mom!
Posts: 205 | From: Second star to the right | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Chief Wise Man
Nativity Play
# 3674
|
Posted
[sotte voce to Herod]
we'll get to you in a bit, dude. chill.
[/sotte voce]
--------------------
incurablyGeeking westwardly; avatar following yonder star.
Posts: 87 | From: East of Yerushalayem; Ur mebbe... | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Dragon
Nativity Play
# 3669
|
Posted
Now I prophesy we'll be sorted soon
With a Star in the East shining bright
And a glory eclipsing the light of the moon
And sweet comfort in darkness and night
--------------------
come home to a real welsh dragon fire..
Posts: 103 | From: The Stage | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
bee_of_good_cheer
Nativity Play
# 3672
|
Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Wise Guy:
(Wise guy ditches moth eaten robe to reveal leather motorcycling gear. Dumb Lap dancers wheel in a gorgeous Harley, on which he climbs. 'Born to be Wild" begins to play.)
WHO'S IN? WE'RE HEADING WEST!
straddles cerulean electraglide, pushes thumb-kicker and revs engine LOUDLY (shotgun pipes, you see)
putts up to wise guy ~
i'm there, man!
(puttaputt puttaputt puttaputt)
hey - nice scoot! god rides a harley, donchaknow!
![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
(puttaputt puttaputt puttaputt)
--------------------
how many angels can dance on the head of a pin? (ponders zephirine of the roses)
Posts: 39 | From: earth | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Wise Man 2
Nativity Play
# 3654
|
Posted
Where exactly are we going? Any ideas? or do we just head for Jerusalem and see what comes up? We could always check those sheep entrails if no other sign guides us.
--------------------
When I'm not creeping around stables at 2 in the morning I go by the name Alan
Posts: 67 | From: The Orient | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Stable Cat
Nativity Play
# 3657
|
Posted
*stable cat decides herod is boring after all, leaps lightly of his shoulder, and vanishes into the wise men's luggage, to find a cozy spot to sleep*
purrrrr
--------------------
nicolemrw says "meow!"
Posts: 85 | From: the stable | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Chief Wise Man
Nativity Play
# 3674
|
Posted
Well, if the STAR would show up, it MIGHT be able to show us the way ....
[hint, hint]
--------------------
incurablyGeeking westwardly; avatar following yonder star.
Posts: 87 | From: East of Yerushalayem; Ur mebbe... | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Wise Guy
Nativity Play
# 3707
|
Posted
(Jumps off bike and throws protective arms around nearest sheep.)
Just BACK OFF, buddy, or I'l be checking your entrails!
Anyhow, my understanding is that the king resides in the...
(Dives for notes on stage floor)
West. Should we let the Cat-Hater in on this or just take off?
--------------------
KELLY ALVES makes a flip remark and ends up in a play. Hi, Mom!
Posts: 205 | From: Second star to the right | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Chief Wise Man
Nativity Play
# 3674
|
Posted
[mulling over gift choices]
I asked Phil to check on the internet to see if the proud parents have registered anywhere. Apparently not. Joe is being discreet since it's a rather awkward, sticky situation 'n all
[/mulling]
--------------------
incurablyGeeking westwardly; avatar following yonder star.
Posts: 87 | From: East of Yerushalayem; Ur mebbe... | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Rudolph the Red-Nosed Sheep
Nativity Play
# 3667
|
Posted
<Nose glows>
Hey, are you guys are looking for some kind of bright light?
--------------------
I may be just a purple sheep with a funny nose, but ThatsMrJuice 2U!
Posts: 110 | From: The Sheep Shed | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Wise Man 2
Nativity Play
# 3654
|
Posted
Hmm, couldn't we just pick up a little something in the market at Jerusalem? I hear they do a good line in assorted incense - myrhh, frankincense and the like. They get through tons of the stuff in that whacking great Temple Herod built there. Just bring a great pile of gold, and find some trustworthy henchmen to guard it.
--------------------
When I'm not creeping around stables at 2 in the morning I go by the name Alan
Posts: 67 | From: The Orient | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Sheep 3
Nativity Play
# 3663
|
Posted
[Sheep 3 emerges from the wood shed, hears voices on-stage which seem to be calling, and heads in that direction.]
Baaaaaa.
--------------------
jlg the sheep
Posts: 278 | From: lost in a pasture | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
|
|
Dragon
Nativity Play
# 3669
|
Posted
We have a virgin shining bright
A shepherd and a Rowen
A Wise Guy lighting up the night
though he don't know where he's goin'
(or he's very late anyway)
--------------------
come home to a real welsh dragon fire..
Posts: 103 | From: The Stage | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Chief Wise Man
Nativity Play
# 3674
|
Posted
This is the time of year when we think back to the very first Christmas, when the Three Wise Men-Gaspar, Balthasar and Herb-went to see the baby Jesus, and, according to the Book of Matthew, "presented unto Him gifts; gold, frankincense, and myrrh."
These are simple words, but if we analyze them carefully, we discover an important, yet often-overlooked, theological fact: There is no mention of wrapping paper.
If there had been wrapping paper, Matthew would have said so:
"And lo, the gifts WERE inside 600 square cubits of paper.
"And the paper WAS festooned with pictures of Frosty the Snowman.
"And Joseph WAS going to throweth it away, but Mary saideth unto him, she saideth, 'Holdeth it! That is nice paper! Saveth it for next year!'
"And Joseph DID rolleth his eyeballs.
"And the baby Jesus WAS more interested in the paper than, for example, the frankincense."
But these words do not appear in the Bible, which means that the very first Christmas gifts were NOT wrapped. This is because the people giving
those gifts had two important characteristics:
1. They were wise.
2. They were men.
...
--------------------
incurablyGeeking westwardly; avatar following yonder star.
Posts: 87 | From: East of Yerushalayem; Ur mebbe... | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Deputy Chief Shepherd
Nativity Play
# 3698
|
Posted
Than ones you dont ![[Snigger]](graemlins/snigger.gif)
--------------------
Yes, I'm a madferret. And that's my own teatowel.
Posts: 115 | From: seated on the ground | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Wise Guy
Nativity Play
# 3707
|
Posted
(Rifling madly through notes.)
The ALLIGATOR star?!
--------------------
KELLY ALVES makes a flip remark and ends up in a play. Hi, Mom!
Posts: 205 | From: Second star to the right | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Dragon
Nativity Play
# 3669
|
Posted
A wise man he might be a lord
Of a great and powerful nation
But we haven’t just one star on board
We got a constellation
--------------------
come home to a real welsh dragon fire..
Posts: 103 | From: The Stage | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Sheep 3
Nativity Play
# 3663
|
Posted
[Sheep 3 appears on stage and is startled by the sudden bright-shining light of the Star in the East]
*sheep plop*
Baaa. Baaaaaaaaaaa.
--------------------
jlg the sheep
Posts: 278 | From: lost in a pasture | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Deputy Chief Shepherd
Nativity Play
# 3698
|
Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Chief Comic Shepherd:
Just a thought - I prefer the Crown, but there's a nice 'Star' in Bethlehem - you could do worse!
They serve Old Peculiar, which should suit you lot fine. But no sheep.
I've heard that the Hogshead does a fine Black Sheep...
--------------------
Yes, I'm a madferret. And that's my own teatowel.
Posts: 115 | From: seated on the ground | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Chief Wise Man
Nativity Play
# 3674
|
Posted
My point is that gift-wrapping is one of those skills-like having babies that come more naturally to women than to men. That is why today I am presenting:
GIFT-WRAPPING TIPS FOR MEN
* Whenever possible, buy gifts that are already wrapped. If, when the recipient opens the gift, neither one of you recognizes it, you can claim
that it's myrrh.
* The editors of Woman's Day magazine recently ran an item on how to make your own wrapping paper by printing a design on it with an apple sliced in half horizontally and dipped in a mixture of food coloring and liquid starch. They must be smoking crack.
* If you're giving a hard-to-wrap gift, skip the wrapping paper! Just put it inside a bag and stick one of those little adhesive bows on it. This creates a festive visual effect that is sure to delight the lucky receipt on Christmas morning:
...
--------------------
incurablyGeeking westwardly; avatar following yonder star.
Posts: 87 | From: East of Yerushalayem; Ur mebbe... | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Dragon
Nativity Play
# 3669
|
Posted
The wise men will embark again
off on a motorcycle
we wish them luck though in the main
we're gonna take the Michael
--------------------
come home to a real welsh dragon fire..
Posts: 103 | From: The Stage | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Chief Wise Man
Nativity Play
# 3674
|
Posted
In conclusion, remember that the important thing is not what you give, or how you wrap it. The important thing, during this very special time of
year,
is that you save the receipt.
--------------------
incurablyGeeking westwardly; avatar following yonder star.
Posts: 87 | From: East of Yerushalayem; Ur mebbe... | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
|
|
Dragon
Nativity Play
# 3669
|
Posted
So they have got a star to shine
And they have got a lift
Perchance by influence divine
They each will find a gift
--------------------
come home to a real welsh dragon fire..
Posts: 103 | From: The Stage | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Chief Wise Man
Nativity Play
# 3674
|
Posted
Oi! Break out the sunglasses and let's get this trip on the ROAD!
[all Wise men,guys and magi collect themselves into vehicles with assorted sheeps, cats, gifts and such]
[Queue: Willie Nelson "On the Road Again" as harley's and hot rods with Joe Camel figure painted on the back roar off]
--------------------
incurablyGeeking westwardly; avatar following yonder star.
Posts: 87 | From: East of Yerushalayem; Ur mebbe... | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Dragon
Nativity Play
# 3669
|
Posted
For they have each been blessed and more
By angels they bin zapped
We know they will bring gifts galore
Who cares if they are wrapped?
--------------------
come home to a real welsh dragon fire..
Posts: 103 | From: The Stage | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Wise Guy
Nativity Play
# 3707
|
Posted
Hey, I called on Frank's Inscense. (Sp?)
--------------------
KELLY ALVES makes a flip remark and ends up in a play. Hi, Mom!
Posts: 205 | From: Second star to the right | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Sheep 3
Nativity Play
# 3663
|
Posted
[Startled by the sudden extremely loud noise from the Star, Sheep 3 bolts off-stage and runs into the Tour Bus to hide.]
--------------------
jlg the sheep
Posts: 278 | From: lost in a pasture | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Virgin Mary
Nativity Play
# 3653
|
Posted
TXT TO YZ MEN
I KNOW ITS SPOSED 2 B A SPRISE
BUT IF UR THINKIN WOT 2 GET THE KIDS
A GIFT VOUCHER WD B BEST
OR THE CASH
LUV
BVM
--------------------
Can you have a white wedding in blue?
(Smudgie)
Posts: 287 | From: Down the road from the carpenter's shop, Nazareth | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Wise Guy
Nativity Play
# 3707
|
Posted
(Guns engine again and nods at Rudolph with a flitratious smile)
Hop on.
--------------------
KELLY ALVES makes a flip remark and ends up in a play. Hi, Mom!
Posts: 205 | From: Second star to the right | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Dragon
Nativity Play
# 3669
|
Posted
The wise men could bring gifts for Yule
from each and every nation
or just shop when they stop for fuel
at the next service station...
--------------------
come home to a real welsh dragon fire..
Posts: 103 | From: The Stage | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
The Cow
Nativity Play
# 3656
|
Posted
<Shuffles on to the edge of the stage>
Sotto voce: can I be in this scene? Or is it only sheep and cats?
Er.. moo.
<Departs hencewith>
--------------------
Anybody ever seen a whale in a cow outfit before?
Posts: 41 | From: Stable | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Rudolph the Red-Nosed Sheep
Nativity Play
# 3667
|
Posted
Rudolph doesn't trust this wise guy one bit. Runs off stage to join the other sheep in the tour bus.
--------------------
I may be just a purple sheep with a funny nose, but ThatsMrJuice 2U!
Posts: 110 | From: The Sheep Shed | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Wise Guy
Nativity Play
# 3707
|
Posted
Well, the Alligator star seems to be tapping her toe, so let's follow her.
--------------------
KELLY ALVES makes a flip remark and ends up in a play. Hi, Mom!
Posts: 205 | From: Second star to the right | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Fairy Godmother
Nativity Play
# 3695
|
Posted
*Gathers up her belongings*
Don't know about you but I'm overdue a long hot bath after tonight's performance
--------------------
It could only be Nanny Ogg
Posts: 265 | From: Appearing in a pantomime near you | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Wise Guy
Nativity Play
# 3707
|
Posted
RE: Rudolph.Sigh.
--------------------
KELLY ALVES makes a flip remark and ends up in a play. Hi, Mom!
Posts: 205 | From: Second star to the right | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Wise Man 2
Nativity Play
# 3654
|
Posted
Does anyone have a spare seat where I can sleep during the journey? All this late night star watching and interpretation really knocks it out of you, and I'm shattered.
--------------------
When I'm not creeping around stables at 2 in the morning I go by the name Alan
Posts: 67 | From: The Orient | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Chief Wise Man
Nativity Play
# 3674
|
Posted
Errata Announcment.
[bring up spot on CWM]
Ahem. (clears throat).
It has been notice that the Artist Formerly Known as "Star" Appeared in the East and then traveled to the West.
On behalf of the Zorastorian Society, I apologize for any religous or mental difficulty this may have engendered.
[slinks off stage]
--------------------
incurablyGeeking westwardly; avatar following yonder star.
Posts: 87 | From: East of Yerushalayem; Ur mebbe... | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Dragon
Nativity Play
# 3669
|
Posted
So off they go upon their way
and off I go on mine
I hope you all enjoy the play
Wow! You've seen Erin SHINE ![[Cool]](cool.gif)
night folks
--------------------
come home to a real welsh dragon fire..
Posts: 103 | From: The Stage | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Wise Guy
Nativity Play
# 3707
|
Posted
I got a sidecar, 2. Guess I'm travelling alone anyway. (Sigh)
Thanks for clearing things up, Chief. I knew we were from the east, anyway.
(but see, this is all part of my Method interpretation of my character as a total clod who hasn't studied properly.)
--------------------
KELLY ALVES makes a flip remark and ends up in a play. Hi, Mom!
Posts: 205 | From: Second star to the right | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Wise Guy
Nativity Play
# 3707
|
Posted
(cue violins as Wise Guy stares past the sheep and becomes entraced by the golden brown eyes of a cow. Who needs you, Rudolph.)
--------------------
KELLY ALVES makes a flip remark and ends up in a play. Hi, Mom!
Posts: 205 | From: Second star to the right | Registered: Dec 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Thread closed
Printer-friendly view
