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Source: (consider it)
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Thread: Hell: Baby Names for Atheists
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Curiosity killed ...
Ship's Mug
# 11770
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by rosamundi:
Damien. That's a nice name... ![[Devil]](graemlins/devil.gif)
It's not, believe me, it's not! I know a Damian who worries me lots.
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Mugs - Keep the Ship afloat
Posts: 13794 | From: outiside the outer ring road | Registered: Aug 2006
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Beautiful Dreamer
Shipmate
# 10880
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Posted
My real name is Shannon. Some sources say it means 'wise one'. I don't know how true that is, but I don't think it has any religious source. It is the name of a region and river in Ireland and can be used for a male or a female.
My sister's name is Kelly, also an Irish name and also unisex.
My sister in law's name is Raina. Her parents made it up.
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More where that came from
Now go away, or I shall taunt you a second time!
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the Pookah
Shipmate
# 9186
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Posted
Not really Beautiful Dreamer;
Kelly isn't unisex, O' Cailleagh for men and something like Nic Cailleagh for women! Real Irish names are tough: Eamonn, Fergal (silent 'g'), Aoife, Oisin, Cian. It's a minefield out there.
Welsh Dragon: I like Rowan, Hazel for witches. There are lots of nice names for non-Christians without sounding creepy or cheap.
I still like the custom of qualities & it works for atheists: Compassion, Sojourner...
the Pookah
[ 15. October 2007, 06:21: Message edited by: the Pookah ]
Posts: 926 | From: the Northern colonies | Registered: Mar 2005
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Firenze
Ordinary decent pagan
# 619
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Beautiful_Dreamer:
My sister in law's name is Raina. Her parents made it up.
They may think they did... It is the name of the heroine of Shaw's Arms and the Man .
Posts: 17302 | From: Edinburgh | Registered: Jun 2001
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rosamundi
Ship's lacemaker
# 2495
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Curiosity killed ...:
quote:
Originally posted by rosamundi:
Damien. That's a nice name...
It's not, believe me, it's not! I know a Damian who worries me lots.
It's also the name of the child in the film the Omen.
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Website.
Ship of Fools flickr group
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uncletoby
hobbyhorsical
# 13067
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Callan:
Do atheist babies have rebellious phases as teenagers where they don't want to go to atheist summer camp and decide to join the Society of St Pius X?
My father-in-law is an atheist and was a communist. My wife's teenage rebellion invovled joining the Greek Orthodox church and threatening to become a nun.
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`` L--d! I cannot look at it ----
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Lietuvos Sv. Kazimieras
Shipmate
# 11274
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Posted
Lithuania has brilliant pre-Christian names in common currency, though the Church requires a Christian baptismal name. Thus, boys are often named after early grand dukes or princes of the realm such as Mindaugas, Ringaudas, Gediminas, etc., whilst nature names are quite popular for girls (this harks back to the pagan Lithuanian religion), e.g. Ruta (rue, as in the herb). Although this trend is to do with a nostalgic attempt at national authenticity, rather than atheism, it seems a good basis for finding analogous pre-Christian Anglo-Saxon-Celtic names as well as employing nature names. Sorry if this isn't very hellish.
Posts: 7328 | From: Delaware | Registered: Apr 2006
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Fool of a Took
chock full o' nuts
# 7412
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by the Pookah:
Welsh Dragon: I like Rowan, Hazel for witches. There are lots of nice names for non-Christians without sounding creepy or cheap.
When I named the Nutter "Hazel" I didn't think of it as being particularly non-Christian, just a family name. I suppose if she ever has a brother, calling him Philbert would be just beyond the pale?
Posts: 1205 | From: Toronto-ish | Registered: Jun 2004
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Zwingli
Shipmate
# 4438
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Curiosity killed ...:
quote:
Originally posted by rosamundi:
Damien. That's a nice name...
It's not, believe me, it's not! I know a Damian who worries me lots.
I went to school with a Damian who was a little thug. So much so that over a decade later, when I was leading on a Christian summer camp (the kind teenage atheists go on to rebel against their parents) and one of the kids was a complete dickhead named Todd, I kept calling him Damian by mistake. Which got everyone confused, and I had no way to explain myself; there were no Damian's there to say that I had confused him with.
Posts: 4283 | Registered: Apr 2003
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Rev per Minute
Shipmate
# 69
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Fool of a Took:
quote:
Originally posted by the Pookah:
Welsh Dragon: I like Rowan, Hazel for witches. There are lots of nice names for non-Christians without sounding creepy or cheap.
When I named the Nutter "Hazel" I didn't think of it as being particularly non-Christian, just a family name. I suppose if she ever has a brother, calling him Philbert would be just beyond the pale?
You see, over here that would just be the son of a deluded Leicester City fan who missed his team's old ground ![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
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"Allons-y!" "Geronimo!" "Oh, for God's sake!" The Day of the Doctor
At the end of the day, we face our Maker alongside Jesus. RIP ken
Posts: 2696 | From: my desk (if I can find the keyboard under this mess) | Registered: May 2001
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Beautiful Dreamer
Shipmate
# 10880
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Posted
I went to university with a couple of very nice men named Damien (or Damion, in one case). I'm sure they got picked on in school by people who saw The Omen, but they are very good people.
Leslie is the name of one of my best friends from university, as is Aimee. Another girl I know here is named Promise. Her sister is Amberley.
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More where that came from
Now go away, or I shall taunt you a second time!
Posts: 6028 | From: Outside Atlanta, GA | Registered: Jan 2006
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Emma Louise
Storm in a teapot
# 3571
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Posted
Leslie and Aimee are quite common here!
Posts: 12719 | From: Enid Blyton territory. | Registered: Nov 2002
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cattyish
Wuss in Boots
# 7829
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Posted
I would love to know where Meri (Egyptian for Beloved) who was my best friend in primary school ended up. Her sister was called Linnet after the bird.
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...to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived, this is to have succeeded.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
Posts: 1794 | From: Scotland | Registered: Jul 2004
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basso
Ship’s Crypt Keeper
# 4228
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Jengie Jon:
well for a girl Belladona should work well.
The genealogies in Lord of the Rings include a hobbit named Belladonna Took.
Posts: 4358 | From: Bay Area, Calif | Registered: Mar 2003
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the Pookah
Shipmate
# 9186
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Posted
Lietuvos;
indeed, Lithuanians were quite reluctant converts;-)It took a crusade in the 13th Century. And so there are a ton of names. I'm in touch with Romuva, the Lithuanian pagans & a scholarly bunch they are...
To be hellish;-) There are quite horrid saints names as Gogol pointed out: Akakii Akakievich is pretty awful.
As for Hazel, the entire 'nut' pun is suitable for 6 year olds..... Hazel, Ash, Linden, are wonderful pagan and atheist names.
Posts: 926 | From: the Northern colonies | Registered: Mar 2005
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The Weeder
Shipmate
# 11321
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Callan:
Mary Midgley is an atheist but she probably doesn't qualify because she and Dawkins don't get on, she's not rude about religious belief (being the daughter of a clergyman) and in some circles Mary is quite an important religious name.
Mrs, Midgeley was my tutor at University, and was quite at home with me reading Religious Studies. A lovely woman.
![[Angel]](graemlins/angel.gif)
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Still missing the gator
Posts: 2542 | From: LaLa Land | Registered: Apr 2006
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chukovsky
Ship's toddler
# 116
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Matt Black:
Presumably 'Lalla', as in Mrs Richard Dawkins, would do for a girl.
Or you could wickedly suggest Marian (the first Mrs Dawkins - not surprisingly not and RD fan).
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This space left intentionally blank. Do not write on both sides of the paper at once.
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Ariel
Shipmate
# 58
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Matt Black:
Presumably 'Lalla', as in Mrs Richard Dawkins, would do for a girl.
Actually, given that she played one of the Time Lords in Doctor Who, Romanadvoratrelundar might also be a possibility.
Posts: 25445 | Registered: May 2001
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The5thMary
Shipmate
# 12953
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Sioni Sais:
She will have to watch gridiron football. Some of the names that the players have come from somewhere God doesn't dwell. There was a "Plaxico" something-or-other playing tightend for a team a couple of weeks ago.
Yeah, it's awful. Plaxico plays for the Pittsburgh Steelers, or did when first I learned of his hideous name. I heard of a young black man here in Atlanta, GA named "ChexLexus" Harris. There is considerable debate here (in the U.S.A.) about what people name their children. What a god-awful name: ChexLexus.
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God gave me my face but She let me pick my nose.
Posts: 3451 | From: Tacoma, WA USA | Registered: Aug 2007
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The5thMary
Shipmate
# 12953
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Posted
My best friend worked with a woman named "Velveeta"!
Velveeta! For those of you across the pond, Velveeta is this processed cheese-like substance. It's sort of good but it's loaded with fat and salt. It's cheap, though, and when you don't have a lot of money for food, it gets eaten a lot.
I hate to say this but most of the awful names I've come across in my time are black folks from the American South and usually, black folks from a lower socio-economic upbringing. I can't fathom why people would name their children such hideous names. I wonder if ol' Velveeta ever managed to get a better paying job than the local Godfather's Pizza chain?
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God gave me my face but She let me pick my nose.
Posts: 3451 | From: Tacoma, WA USA | Registered: Aug 2007
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SearchingForAbsolutes
Shipmate
# 11966
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by dogwonderer:
The best atheist name for a boy is surely Jesus. I was tempted, when puppywonderer was born, but anticipated playground problems.
There may be more problems than you thought.
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In pursuit of pure, virtuous justice, whatever that means.
"And that after this is accomplished, and the brave new world begins/When all men are paid for existing and no man must pay for his sins..." - Rudyard Kipling
Posts: 117 | From: Just North-East of The Centre of the Universe | Registered: Oct 2006
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The5thMary
Shipmate
# 12953
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Fool of a Took:
quote:
Originally posted by marmot:
quote:
Originally posted by RooK:
My spawn will be lucky if I don't name it after a particularly virulent parasite.
Giardia! Cryptosporidium! Time for dinner!
I had a pet rat named yersinia. But then, you can do things to a pet you just can't do to the person who'll be selecting your nursing home.
How about naming your daughter, "Clamidia"? "Vaginellia"? For a boy, "Testacular". "Son, you've done a testacular job on washing my sports car!"
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God gave me my face but She let me pick my nose.
Posts: 3451 | From: Tacoma, WA USA | Registered: Aug 2007
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The5thMary
Shipmate
# 12953
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Posted
I think, to be perfectly safe, atheists should name their children after inanimate objects. How about "Chair" Sinclair? "Desk" Murphy. "Glass" Clown? Hahahaha, that was bad.
"I'd like you to meet the newest member of our family. Nine pounds and seven ounces, little "Bandsaw" and his older sister, "Doorknob". Aren't they the cutest?"
Named for a perfectly lovely saint,
-A.M.A. II/M.B.N. a.k.a. "SpikeyPants"
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God gave me my face but She let me pick my nose.
Posts: 3451 | From: Tacoma, WA USA | Registered: Aug 2007
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Janine
The Endless Simmer
# 3337
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by SearchingForAbsolutes:
quote:
Originally posted by dogwonderer:
The best atheist name for a boy is surely Jesus. I was tempted, when puppywonderer was born, but anticipated playground problems.
There may be more problems than you thought.
Since all the Spanish-heritage countries are crawling with boys and men named Jesus, who do not all die in their thirties after a degenerate entertainment career, I suspect the guy in the link turned out so strange because his father was a sicko, not because of the name.
More atheist baby names:
Dizbelliffa
Incredula
Manissgod
Ration-Al
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I'm a Fundagelical Evangimentalist. What are you?
Take Me Home * My Heart * An hour with Rich Mullins *
Posts: 13788 | From: Below the Bible Belt | Registered: Sep 2002
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Raspberry Rabbit
Will preach for food
# 3080
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Posted
Rivers in British Columbia
Fraser
Thompson
Skeena for a little girl might be nice.
RR
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...naked pirates not respecting boundaries...
(((BLOG)))
Posts: 2215 | From: In the middle of France | Registered: Jul 2002
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SearchingForAbsolutes
Shipmate
# 11966
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Janine:
quote:
Originally posted by SearchingForAbsolutes:
quote:
Originally posted by dogwonderer:
The best atheist name for a boy is surely Jesus. I was tempted, when puppywonderer was born, but anticipated playground problems.
There may be more problems than you thought.
Since all the Spanish-heritage countries are crawling with boys and men named Jesus, who do not all die in their thirties after a degenerate entertainment career, I suspect the guy in the link turned out so strange because his father was a sicko, not because of the name.
Ah. What a legitimate, thoughtful, reasonable theory!
Humour needs a good, stern smack on the face with a blunt instrument every once in a while. Thanks for being there.
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In pursuit of pure, virtuous justice, whatever that means.
"And that after this is accomplished, and the brave new world begins/When all men are paid for existing and no man must pay for his sins..." - Rudyard Kipling
Posts: 117 | From: Just North-East of The Centre of the Universe | Registered: Oct 2006
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ken
Ship's Roundhead
# 2460
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Lietuvos Sv. Kazimieras:
Although this trend is to do with a nostalgic attempt at national authenticity, rather than atheism, it seems a good basis for finding analogous pre-Christian Anglo-Saxon-Celtic names
We don't have to look very hard to find pre-Christian English or Germanic names:
Albert, Alfred, Alvin, Arnold, Astrid, Athelstan, Aud, Aylmer, Brandi (yep, an old name really - means "sword" and can be a poetic reference to Wotan/Odhin whose name was not often used explicitly - names to do with spears, wolves, eagles, ravens, helms etc etc, as well as his nickname "Grim"), Dagbert, Drogo, Edwina, Elric (Elf King? We know who he was...), Elvina, Emma, Freya, Grim, Gudrun, Harvard (Might be a from of "Hereward" but might also be from Harbard="Greybeard" and so another kenning for You-Know-Who), Helga/Olga, Hilda (she was a Valkyrie before she was a saint), Oliver, Rolf/Ralph/Ranulph/Randolph/Rudolf/Adolf/Dolf (all originally one name meaning "famous wolf" - a bit totemic, eh?), Rowena, Thora, Winston, Wulf/Wolf - all might have have specific pagan connotations.
Lots of other old pre-Christian names are just names with no obvious religious implications: Alice, Charles (though that's a Frenchified spelling), Edward, Eric, Ethel, Richard, Robert, William (another frogification) and so on!
Am I the only person to think that a proper baby name for an atheist would be something like:
quote:
Ooo diddums whose Mummy's chubby little ickle-wickle athey-wastey then?
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Ken
L’amor che move il sole e l’altre stelle.
Posts: 39579 | From: London | Registered: Mar 2002
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Yorick
Infinite Jester
# 12169
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by ken:
Ooo diddums whose Mummy's chubby little ickle-wickle athey-wastey then?
You're just dysfunctionally jealous because your parents named you Kenneth. Surely one of the crappest names in all history.
[Unless Ken isn't your Real Name, and you chose it as a user name just to be Ironic]
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این نیز بگذرد
Posts: 7574 | From: Natural Sources | Registered: Dec 2006
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Petaflop
Shipmate
# 9804
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Posted
Well I guess a militant atheist could name their child
Robert'); Drop Table Students;
and then send him to a church school.
(with apologies to xkcd).
Posts: 650 | Registered: Jul 2005
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ken
Ship's Roundhead
# 2460
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by dogwonderer:
quote:
Originally posted by ken:
Ooo diddums whose Mummy's chubby little ickle-wickle athey-wastey then?
You're just dysfunctionally jealous because your parents named you Kenneth. Surely one of the crappest names in all history.
A good Saints name, Kenneth. Patron Saint of Cork City (though the Irish can't spell it). Name of the first King of Scotland as well, King Kenneth the First.
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Ken
L’amor che move il sole e l’altre stelle.
Posts: 39579 | From: London | Registered: Mar 2002
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Alaric the Goth
Shipmate
# 511
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Posted
Isn't 'Kenneth' as a name reckoned to be of Strathclyde British origin (I know that Kenneth Mac Alpin was a Scot): Cynddylan perhaps??
BTW, I appreciate your guide to Germanic (Norse/OE/Frankish) names. I didn't know that about Ranuplh/Rudolf/Adolf. What was the Germanic form of Oliver? Ulfhere??
[ 02. November 2007, 15:11: Message edited by: Alaric the Goth ]
Posts: 3322 | From: West Thriding | Registered: Jun 2001
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Alaric the Goth
Shipmate
# 511
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Posted
Oh, ken, you missed 'Wulfstan' off your list, an name I reckon had a heathen origin, and one I mention as it was seriously considered as a middle name for the Elder Goth-bairn!
Posts: 3322 | From: West Thriding | Registered: Jun 2001
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aumbry
Shipmate
# 436
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Posted
I was under the impression that the Anglo-Saxon equivalent of Adolf was Athelwulf. I am sure Ken can confirm or otherwise.
There is so much in a name.
It is difficult to imagine Athelwulf Hitler being determined on world domination.
Aumbry
Posts: 3869 | From: Quedlinburg | Registered: Jun 2001
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Alaric the Goth
Shipmate
# 511
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Posted
I have often wondered, do many/any Germans and Austrians still call their sons 'Adolf' since WW2? Or has it rather fallen out of fashion, except perhaps among Neo-Nazis?
Posts: 3322 | From: West Thriding | Registered: Jun 2001
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aumbry
Shipmate
# 436
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Posted
I think it is safe to say it is no longer a popular name in Germany.
Aumbry
Posts: 3869 | From: Quedlinburg | Registered: Jun 2001
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aumbry
Shipmate
# 436
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Posted
In a sense I cannot see why the name should suffer - I mean Jack is one of the most popular boys names in Britain despite Jack the Ripper.
Aumbry
Posts: 3869 | From: Quedlinburg | Registered: Jun 2001
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aumbry
Shipmate
# 436
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Posted
True - but what if Jack the Ripper had become German Chancellor and Fuehrer?
Aumbry
Posts: 3869 | From: Quedlinburg | Registered: Jun 2001
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aumbry
Shipmate
# 436
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Posted
Thinking about it there would hardly be a name to choose if you discounted serial killers:
Jack, Fred, Neil, Ian, Rosie, Myra, Vlad, Sweeny........
Aumbry
Posts: 3869 | From: Quedlinburg | Registered: Jun 2001
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The Artisan
Shipmate
# 4277
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Posted
I worked in a school with a child named Nevaeh (heaven backwards) so how about Tsiehta for a girl (the T could be silent) or Dogon or Snikwad for a boy. Cigol has a nice ring to it (again for a boy I think)and so does Noitulove whereas Reveil Ebnu has more of an ethnic/French feel.
On the Velveeta theme - how about a Marmite or a Marmalade. Fish Paste might be a bit too cruel!
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Sometimes our best intentions do not go
amiss; sometimes we do as we meant to.
The sun will sometimes melt a field of sorrow
that seemed hard frozen: may it happen for you Sheenagh Pugh
Posts: 671 | Registered: Mar 2003
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mousethief
Ship's Thieving Rodent
# 953
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by The Artisan:
I worked in a school with a child named Nevaeh (heaven backwards) so how about Tsiehta for a girl (the T could be silent) or Dogon or Snikwad for a boy.
I've worked with people who might best be described as snikwads.
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This is the last sig I'll ever write for you...
Posts: 63536 | From: Washington | Registered: Jul 2001
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Jengie jon
Semper Reformanda
# 273
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Posted
Ken
With the Irish-British (the Irish were better at it than the rest of us, but all of us did it) ability to create saints, you'd better be careful on which you suggest. A feminist theologian might well choose Hilda as a suitable name for a girl.
I guess that several others on your list have attached Saints.
Jengie
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"To violate a persons ability to distinguish fact from fantasy is the epistemological equivalent of rape." Noretta Koertge
Back to my blog
Posts: 20894 | From: city of steel, butterflies and rainbows | Registered: May 2001
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Campbellite
Ut unum sint
# 1202
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by aumbry:
In a sense I cannot see why the name should suffer
How many Americans have named their sons "Benedict" since the Revolution?
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I upped mine. Up yours.
Suffering for Jesus since 1966.
WTFWED?
Posts: 12001 | From: between keyboard and chair | Registered: Aug 2001
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the Pookah
Shipmate
# 9186
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Posted
Kevin is popular in East Germany so go figure.
As we discussed before I don't imagine atheists would care to name their kin for either god or gods: Thora & Grim being out.
Meditation, Concord, Peace, Reason, Temperance, Compassion are all quality names that atheists could name their children.
the Pookah
Posts: 926 | From: the Northern colonies | Registered: Mar 2005
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Ariel
Shipmate
# 58
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by The Artisan:
I worked in a school with a child named Nevaeh (heaven backwards) so how about Tsiehta for a girl (the T could be silent) or Dogon or Snikwad for a boy.
This is how Senga became a first name in Scotland. Tsieh Ta, however, could well mean something rather disconcerting in Chinese. I'm reminded of the story of the English man who translated the syllables of his name into Chinese characters, only to be greeted with bemusement and asked if he was really called Bucket of Heavenly Manure.
Cheers
Leira.
Posts: 25445 | Registered: May 2001
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Foolhearty
Shipmate
# 6196
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Posted
Lilith is a pretty girl's name, and has the advantage of being extra-canonical. But continuing in the Puritan line, I think "Apocrypha" has a nice kind of Addams-family ring to it.
[ 04. November 2007, 01:22: Message edited by: Foolhearty ]
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Fear doesn't empty tomorrow of its perils; it empties today of its power.
Posts: 2301 | From: Upper right-hand corner | Registered: May 2004
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Firenze
Ordinary decent pagan
# 619
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Ariel:
the story of the English man who translated the syllables of his name into Chinese characters, only to be greeted with bemusement and asked if he was really called Bucket of Heavenly Manure.
Ah, they do it for you at the seal-cutting place in Stanley market. My transliteration means 'Beautiful Poetry'. Actually, the syllables don't sound anything like my name. But then an accurate rendition would probably come out as Unbecoming Tractor or something.
Posts: 17302 | From: Edinburgh | Registered: Jun 2001
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k-mann
Shipmate
# 8490
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by dogwonderer:
quote:
Originally posted by Sandemaniac:
What do atheists shout when they orgasm?
Dawkins! Dawkins! O, Dawkins.... I'm coming!
Or; Me! Me! O Me.... I'm coming!
It might put your partner out, though.
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"Being religious means asking passionately the question of the meaning of our existence and being willing to receive answers, even if the answers hurt."
— Paul Tillich
Katolikken
Posts: 1314 | From: Norway | Registered: Sep 2004
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