Source: (consider it)
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Thread: Heaven: Oh, That Sarkycow!
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Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32
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Posted
[Introducing Ship of Fools's latest sitcom--it's the zany adventures of the fun-loving, well-meaning Hellhost who somehow always winds up causing disasters]
She's a working girl with a job in Hell, Though sometimes things don't turn out so well. She'll get by some way, somehow, Though trouble always follows Sarkycow!
< Scene: The Hell Office; Rook and Nightlamp are sharpening their pitchforks >
Rook: So, is [CENSORED] or [CENSORED] a better insult?
Nightlamp: It depends on their denomination. < Canned Laughter >
< Sarkycow enters; applause >
Rook: Hey, Sarkycow--how was your weekend?
Sarkycow: Don't ask! < Canned Laughter > On the bus today, this guy wouldn't put his candy wrapper in his pocket but just kept on playing with it and making that crinkly noise--so I wound up decapitating him. < Canned Laughter >
Rook: I hate when that happens. < Canned Laughter >
Nightlamp: So that's why you're late.
Sarkycow < checking watch > Oh, no! Has David noticed--
David < from his office >: SARKYCOOOOOW!!!... < Canned Laughter >
Sarkycow: Uh oh... [ 17. February 2004, 20:42: Message edited by: Stoo ]
-------------------- Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake. Andrew Knoll
Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001
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Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32
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Posted
David: SARKYCOW, GET IN HERE NOW!!
Sarkycow: Coming, David--
< Scene: David's Office >
David < fuming >: Sarkycow, I have a lot of explaining to do to Heaven--one of their bunnies accidentally wandered in, and, well, how do you explain this? < throws mangled corpse on his desk; Canned Laughter >
Sarkycow: Uh...suicide? < Canned laughter and cheers >
David < sputtering >: Sarkycow, give me one good reason why I shouldn't fire you!
Sarkycow: Because no one else fits my costume? < Canned Laughter and Applause >
David < doing a slow burn >: Sarkycow, I'm giving you one more chance--I'm putting you in charge of the "Lesbian Atheists Duped Me into Having Sex" thread...
[typo] [ 27. May 2003, 15:45: Message edited by: Belisarius ]
-------------------- Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake. Andrew Knoll
Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001
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Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32
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Posted
Sarkycow: Don't worry, David--I'll do you proud! < stands up suddenly to salute, which upsets David's coffee cup, spilling the scalding contents into his lap >
David: D'OH!!! < Canned Laughter > GET OUT AND DON'T COME BACK UNTIL YOU'RE SEMI-COMPETENT!!
Sarkycow < sighing > That may be a while < Canned Laughter >...
-------------------- Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake. Andrew Knoll
Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001
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Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32
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Posted
< Scene: Hell's Hallway >
Sarkycow: David's never been this angry before...I'm really going to have to watch my step--
< A Newbie walks up >
Newbie: Excuse me, but where do I complain--
< In one reflexive motion, Sarkycow disembowels the Newbie >
Sarkycow: Oops. < Canned Laughter >
-------------------- Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake. Andrew Knoll
Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001
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Arrietty
Ship's borrower
# 45
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Posted
Sarkycow: Oh sugar! - erm
<remembers she is a mean hard hellhost>
Sarkycow: I mean SH*TSH*TSH*TSH*T!!!!! That's the Newbie that David had put on one side for Erin.
<David stomps into the corridor>
David: Where's that Newbie I've been saving for Erin?
Sarkycow: Oh, er, I was - er - j-just cutting him a nice bit of slack David!
<canned laughter>
David: OK, but don't give him too much rope. And remember Erin wants to see him in 15 minutes for an asshat fitting.
Sarkycow: <sweetly> OK David!!!!
<David stares at her>
Sarkycow: I mean - er
<growling and prodding her fork towards him>
Sarkycow: WHAT IS IT TO YOU, YOU MISERABLE GIT???
David: that's better! <stomps back into office>
Sarkycow: Phew! That was a close call! I'm not sure I can keep up this pretence of being surly and unhelpful for much longer!
<sound of canned audience almost throwing up in merriment>
Sarkycow <dreamily>....I wonder whatever an asshat is ......it must be something really nice if Erin is giving one to a newbie.....she's always giving them to other people.... sigh!.....I do wish someone would give me a dear little asshat....
-------------------- i-church
Online Mission and Ministry
Posts: 6634 | From: Coventry, UK | Registered: May 2001
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Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32
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Posted
Sarkycow: I know--I'll just put on the Newbie's skin and see Erin myself! Then I can finally get one of those asshats!
< Canned "UH OH!" sounds >
< as she scoops out the remaining innards from the newbie > Should I check the "Lesbian Atheists Duped Me into Having Sex" thread first?--Nah! What could possibly happen there?
< More Canned "UH OH!" sounds >
-------------------- Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake. Andrew Knoll
Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001
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MadKaren
Shipmate
# 1033
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Posted
Meanwhile, on the 'Lesbian Atheists duped me into sex' thread.....
MadKaren
-------------------- -- Why do people who claim to love God embarrass him in public?
Posts: 866 | From: Jumping along the line between genius and insanity.... | Registered: Aug 2001
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Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32
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Posted
Fundamentalist Poster: [CENSORED][CENSORED][CENSORED][CENSORED][CENSORED][CENSORED][CENSORED][CENSORED][CENSORED]!!!!
Atheist Poster: [CENSORED][CENSORED][CENSORED][CENSORED][CENSORED][CENSORED][CENSORED][CENSORED][CENSORED]!!!!
Lesbian Poster: [CENSORED][CENSORED][CENSORED][CENSORED][CENSORED][CENSORED][CENSORED][CENSORED][CENSORED]!!!!
Celibate Poster: [CENSORED][CENSORED][CENSORED][CENSORED][CENSORED][CENSORED][CENSORED][CENSORED][CENSORED]!!!!
Rook < strolling in >: I'd better take a look at how Sarkycow's doing... [ 27. May 2003, 19:34: Message edited by: Belisarius ]
-------------------- Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake. Andrew Knoll
Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001
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duchess
Ship's Blue Blooded Lady
# 2764
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Posted
Wow. Somebody's got crushy-poo.
-------------------- ♬♭ We're setting sail to the place on the map from which nobody has ever returned ♫♪♮ Ship of Fools-World Party
Posts: 11197 | From: Do you know the way? | Registered: May 2002
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Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32
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Posted
< Rook does a double-take >
Rook: NIGHTLAMP! GET OVER HERE AND HELP ME!
< Rook grabs a firehose and tries to run to the thread, but the hose is too short, causing Rook to be jerked back and to land flat on his back. Canned Laughter. Nightlamp rushes in, trips on the hose, and falls flat on his face. More Canned Laughter >
[typo] [ 28. May 2003, 18:33: Message edited by: Belisarius ]
-------------------- Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake. Andrew Knoll
Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001
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Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32
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Posted
< Sarkycow is waiting outside Erin's office in her disguise >
Sarkycow: Boy, this Newbie is sure itchy. < Canned Laughter > Wait--he had an FAQ manual on him--I wonder why I never got around to reading it. < Canned Laughter > Let me see what exactly an "asshat" is...
< Sarkycow looks in the manual for a few seconds, then jerks her head up in bug-eyed shock. Canned Laughter >
Sarkycow: Oh, no! I have to get out of here!
Erin < from her office >: BRING THE NEWBIE TO ME!
< Sarkycow trembles in amusing terror. Canned Laughter >
-------------------- Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake. Andrew Knoll
Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001
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Lifeman
Troll
# 579
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Posted
Bilisarious,
I can't wait until this new sit com hits UK TV - the scriptwriters must include at least one episode (maybe one series!) about Miss Cow's strong feminist characteristics.
Don't forget that the county of Essex should be an important backdrop for several episodes.
Any chance of Lifeman making the odd cameo appearance?
Posts: 746 | Registered: Jun 2001
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Louise
Shipmate
# 30
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Posted
< as Sarky cowers behind the nearest potted plant in dread fear of Erin, she realises that her outfit is lacking a certain something.
She glances over towards the filthy, decrepit cages in the waiting room marked 'Troll Petting Zoo'. There, passed out on the floor is a drunk troll. Aha! Instantly she grabs her Hell-host regulation issue machete and expertly trepans the top off Lifeman's skull while he is snoozing. Some deft carving and a quick bit of superglue to stick it to a handy shell background and pin she made earlier, and she has the very brooch her ensemble was lacking.>
And so Lifeman makes a cameo appearance.
-------------------- Now you need never click a Daily Mail link again! Kittenblock replaces Mail links with calming pics of tea and kittens! http://www.teaandkittens.co.uk/ Click under 'other stuff' to find it.
Posts: 6918 | From: Scotland | Registered: May 2001
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Sarkycow
La belle Dame sans merci
# 1012
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Posted
Ok, where's the scene where I bollock all the Heaven hosts for being wet, incompetant namby-pambies? Cause that happens most days in Hosts...
Viki
-------------------- “Just because your voice reaches halfway around the world doesn't mean you are wiser than when it reached only to the end of the bar.”
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Smudgie
Ship's Barnacle
# 2716
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Posted
Notice to all ShipMates
You don't realise just how close to the truth this is...
[Smudgie kindly put this message from me. What a lovely lady] [ 28. May 2003, 08:16: Message edited by: ChrisT ]
-------------------- Miss you, Erin.
Posts: 14382 | From: Under the duvet | Registered: Apr 2002
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Ham'n'Eggs
Ship's Pig
# 629
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Posted
quote: she has the very brooch her ensemble was lacking
And so Lifeman makes a cameo appearance.
audience groans, small ripple
-------------------- "...the heresies that men do leave / Are hated most of those they did deceive" - Will S
Posts: 3103 | From: Genghis Khan's sleep depot | Registered: Jun 2001
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Arrietty
Ship's borrower
# 45
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Posted
<Erin comes out
into the corridor>
Erin: That's a nice cameo brooch you're wearing.
Sarkycow <confused> er......
Erin <hastily> I mean - GET THE **** IN HERE YOU **** ****ED ****ING ******** NEWBIE!!!!!!
Sarkycow: <aside> Phew! She hasn't seen through my disguise yet!
Sarkycow: <to Erin> Cool it! Why don't you get a LIFE, MAN??????
<canned audience erupt into howls of artificial laughter with no preliminary giggles>
-------------------- i-church
Online Mission and Ministry
Posts: 6634 | From: Coventry, UK | Registered: May 2001
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Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32
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Posted
< Enraged, Erin draws back her fist. Sarkycow ducks inside her costume just in time--Erin socks the Newbie's head clean off. Sarkycow has enough presence of mind to fall to the floor and play dead >
< Erin takes out a tape recorder and says > Note to self--no more appointments before my first cup of coffee. < Canned laughter and applause > Better call the cleanup crew...
Sarkycow < to self >: If I'm lucky, I can get back to Hell before I'm missed... [ 28. May 2003, 02:32: Message edited by: Belisarius ]
-------------------- Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake. Andrew Knoll
Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001
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Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32
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Posted
< Rook and Nightlamp are now covered with cream pies as they slip around on the floor. Yet more canned laughter. >
Rook < tasting the pie on his face >: I have to admit it, those Lesbian Atheists know how to cook. < Canned Laughter >
-------------------- Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake. Andrew Knoll
Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001
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Caver
Shipmate
# 4392
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Posted
hmm, looks good, settles down and waits a minute. Must be the advert break. Oh well, bound to be some more action soon. Is there time for a coffee first?
-------------------- Quote from Annie Day "Could be interested, picking people up on the way down." Now that never happens to me underground :-(
Posts: 104 | From: Leeds, UK | Registered: Apr 2003
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Smudgie
Ship's Barnacle
# 2716
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Posted
quote: Originally posted by Smudgie: Notice to all ShipMates
You don't realise just how close to the truth this is...
[Smudgie kindly put this message from me. What a lovely lady]
Isn't it nice when even a lordly host can admit to his mistakes????
-------------------- Miss you, Erin.
Posts: 14382 | From: Under the duvet | Registered: Apr 2002
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Lifeman
Troll
# 579
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Posted
(camera pans to open view of Essex countryside as Lifeman is seen heading back North with a sore head)
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Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32
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Posted
Rook: Wait a minute--don't we have a supernatural power-of-life-and-death over these posters?
Nightlamp: NOW HE REMINDS ME! < Canned Laughter >
< Meanwhile, in Erin's Office >
Viola: Should I hang these remains on the Boards as a warning?
Erin: Nah--we have enough of that already. Just use the incinerator.
< Sarkycow gulps. Canned Laughter >
-------------------- Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake. Andrew Knoll
Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001
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MadKaren
Shipmate
# 1033
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Posted
<Erin motions to a couple of apprentices to drag the corpse away>
1st apprentice - so how are you finding things
2nd apprentice - I heard Hell is missing a Hellhost, and RooK n Nightlamp sure are pissed about it. Turns out she left a thread out of control and the fires have threatened the whole ship.
Sarkycow (under breath) - Oh *****, I've got to get away from here.
1st apprentice - I think this corpse is moving...
Madkaren
-------------------- -- Why do people who claim to love God embarrass him in public?
Posts: 866 | From: Jumping along the line between genius and insanity.... | Registered: Aug 2001
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Miffy
Ship's elephant
# 1438
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Posted
The apprentices pale as from the depths of a distant Eurovision thread issue sounds of heaven hosts carousing together. Seeing they're distracted, Sarky siezes her chance and makes a break for it.
-------------------- "I don't feel like smiling." "You're English dear; fake it!" (Colin Firth "Easy Virtue") Growing Greenpatches
Posts: 4739 | From: The Kitchen | Registered: Oct 2001
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Lifeman
Troll
# 579
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Posted
(Lifeman eventually makes it back to the North and prepares to employ his skills as a master of comedy assessment for 'the Sark Cow show')
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Joyeux
Ship's Lady of Laughter
# 3851
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Posted
quote: Originally posted by Belisarius: < Rook grabs a firehouse... >
Cool! Throwing pies and firehouses! Good thing my neighbour has satellite and doesn't mind me coming over to watch!
-------------------- Float?...Do science too
Posts: 4318 | From: over th... no, there! | Registered: Dec 2002
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Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32
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Posted
< Rook and Nightlamp stand in the incinerated wasteland that was the "Lesbian Atheists Duped Me Into Sex" Thread >
Nightlamp: Maybe we overreacted. < Canned laughter >
Rook: I feel a strange emptiness.
Nightlamp: That's because you haven't had lunch. < More Canned laughter >
Rook: Oh, right--well, I'd better eat in today. < Takes a chomp out of Fundamentalist Poster; Laugh Track goes into hysterics >
-------------------- Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake. Andrew Knoll
Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001
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Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32
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Posted
< As Sarkycow is dragging herself away, she bumps into a lamp. This leads to a chain reaction of crashing furniture >
Apprentices: IT'S ALIVE!!! < Canned Laughter >
< Sarkycow jumps out of the Newbie's skin and runs for it... >
-------------------- Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake. Andrew Knoll
Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001
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Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32
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Posted
< David is in his office sipping tea >
David: Things have been so peaceful < swivels his seat to Viewing Screen >--I'll take one glance at the Board and then I can go home early--
< Within Seconds, he sees what's left of the "Lesbian Atheists Duped Me Into Sex" Thread and the surrounding mess. Furious, he clenches his hands, crushing the teacup. Canned Laughter >
David: SARKYCOOOOOW!!!...
-------------------- Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake. Andrew Knoll
Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001
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Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32
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Posted
< Scene: The Styx. The scalded, limping survivors of the "Lesbian Atheists Duped Me Into Sex" Thread are complaining >
Celibate Poster: We weren't treated in a Christian manner!
Atheist Poster: This place confirms Christianity's worst stereotypes!
Fundamentalist Poster: One of the Hosts ate my spleen! < Canned Laughter... >
-------------------- Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake. Andrew Knoll
Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001
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soggy_amphibian
Shipmate
# 2487
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Posted
SarkyCow: [to Herself] how do I get out of this one? I know, I need to distract them. Maybe I could get away with starting another Heaven/Hell war?
<Cue dramatic music>
-------------------- Buffy: I don't like you hanging out with someone that... short. Riley: Yeah, a lot of young people nowadays are experimenting with shortness.
Posts: 712 | From: Back at home | Registered: Mar 2002
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Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32
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Posted
Sarkycow: ...but first, I need my pitchfork!
< Scene: Hell Office. Sarkycow is jogging back when she sees an apoplectic David. Does an abrupt about-face; canned laughter >
David: SARKYCOOOOOW!!!!
Sarkycow: What will I do??--I know! I'll go through the air conditioning system! < squeezes into nearest vent > Oooh, tight fit! Only low-fat posters from now on! < Canned laughter > [ 29. May 2003, 20:18: Message edited by: Belisarius ]
-------------------- Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake. Andrew Knoll
Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001
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Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32
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Posted
< Later, inside a dark passage >
Sarkycow: Ah, there's finally a light--
< but the passage, not meant to carry anything except air currents, suddenly collapses under her weight. Sarkycow crashes through and plummets a story right smack into the Styx commotion >
Sarkycow: OOF! Good thing I landed on this poster! < Canned laughter >
Fundamentalist Poster < moaning > Why me?? < Canned laughter >
Lesbian Poster: Oh no! We aggravated one of the Hosts so much that she tried to kill herself!
Atheist Poster: I didn't realize we were being so obnoxious! Can you ever forgive us?
Celibate Poster: WE'LL NEVER ARGUE AGAIN!
< Posters start crying and form Group Hug >
Laugh Track: AAAAAAAWWWWWWWW...
< David bursts in and stops dead >
David: Ruth, why aren't these posters angry anymore??
Ruth < looks up >: There are posters here? < Canned Laughter > Oh--whatever--time for Happy Hour. < leaves to canned laughter and applause >
David: Sarkycow, I don't know how you did it, but good work--I may even promote you.
Sarkycow: Uh, OK. < Canned Laughter >
David: See you tomorrow. < leaves >
Sarkycow < to self as sappy music plays >: I learned something important today, and that's...that's...oh, I'll figure it out later. Hey Ruth--wait up! < Fadeout to canned laughter and cheers >
NEXT EPISODE: SARKYCOW'S BLIND DATE [ 30. May 2003, 01:39: Message edited by: Belisarius ]
-------------------- Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake. Andrew Knoll
Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001
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Lifeman
Troll
# 579
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Posted
I'm looking forward to the Blind date episode.....
Posts: 746 | Registered: Jun 2001
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Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32
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Posted
She's a working girl with a job in Hell, Though sometimes things don't turn out so well. She'll get by some way, somehow, Though trouble always follows Sarkycow!
< Scene: The Hell Office; Rook and Nightlamp are sharpening their pitchforks >
Rook: Do you think it's better to impale a troll from the front or from behind?
Nightlamp: Oh, the front, definitely, so you can see its expression. < Canned Laughter >
< Sarkycow enters; applause >
Rook: Hey, Sarkycow--how did the Church Dance go last night?
Sarkycow: Don't ask! < Canned Laughter > I didnt' want to dance with this guy, but he just wouldn't take no for an answer, so I wound up punching a hole through his chest. < canned laughter > No one else asked me the whole night!
Nightlamp: Maybe you should ask one of the Admins to set you up with someone.
Sarkycow: Oh, I don't know...
-------------------- Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake. Andrew Knoll
Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001
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Paul W.
Shipmate
# 1450
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Posted
*Must resist urge to create animation of this thread* *Must resist urge to create animation of this thread* *Must resist urge to create animation of this thread* *Must resist urge to create animation of this thread* *Must resist urge to create animation of this thread*
Paul W
-------------------- "It's just a ride" - Bill Hicks
Blog Flickr
Posts: 2835 | From: Leeds, UK | Registered: Oct 2001
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Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32
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Posted
Nightlamp: Well, I can't think of anything else, especially after that Tigglet's Dating Agency incident.
Sarkycow: How was I supposed to know the thread would be so flammable? < Canned laughter > Heaven just isn't the place for me--I know! I'll check out that party tonight on the All Saints board!
Nightlamp/Rook: Uh oh... < Canned Laughter >
-------------------- Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake. Andrew Knoll
Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001
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Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32
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Posted
< Segue: All Saints >
Motherboard < standing in the midst of a pile of moaning, wrecked bodies >: Sarkycow, how could you? < canned laughter >. It's going to take me hours to sew all the severed limbs back on!
Sarkycow: I'm sorry if I got carried away, but I thought men would like a woman who can compete--
Motherboard: THIS WAS A SHUFFLEBOARD TOURNAMENT! < Canned hysterics > I really think you need to try a different style of dating.
Sarkycow < weakly >: Would having a rematch help?
Motherboard: OUT! < canned laughter >
-------------------- Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake. Andrew Knoll
Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001
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Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32
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Posted
< The next day--Sarkycow is at her desk filling out an elaborate form >
Nightlamp: I won't say I told you so, but--
Sarkycow: Oh, don't rub it in! I can't make heads or tails out of most of these questions! "What's my Myers-Briggs Type?" How should I know?? The Admins might as well flip a coin--wait a minute! That's what I'll do to finish this stupid form!
< Starts doing so--Canned "UH OH!" sounds >
Nightlamp: Are you sure you should do that? Don't say I didn't warn you--
< Sarkycow reflexively lunges her pitchfork into Nightlamp's side >
Nightlamp: OUCH! < Canned laughter--Nightlamp pulls it out > All right, all right, I'm going...
< David angrily approaches >
David: SARKYCOW!
< Sarkycow starts, scattering papers. Canned laughter >
David: Sarkycow, you are not employed here for the purpose of furthering your admittedly limited social life!
Sarkycow: Oh, David, don't be such a grouch! Don't you want to find a special someone?
David < having another slow burn >: Sarkycow, being as I am the mastermind of the processes keeping Hell's foul chaos from engulfing the other Boards, which often include the execution of punishments too hideous for the human mind to conceive and remain sane, WHAT DO YOU THINK? < Canned tittering >
Sarkycow: Uh...
David: I'LL GIVE YOU A HINT! < grabs form and stuffs it in Sarkycow's mouth. Canned hysterics and applause; David stomps out >
Sarkycow < spitting out form >: Boy, is David grumpy today--now let me finish this form < continues flipping coin; canned laughter >
-------------------- Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake. Andrew Knoll
Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001
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Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32
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Posted
< That evening--Sarkycow enters a designated spot in Limbo >
Sarkycow: Boy, the results came back fast! I hope I'm not late--< rips off arm of a passerby and looks at watch; canned laughter > No, I'm just on time! < glances at sheet > Now, he should be at one of these tables and wearing an orange carnation--
< She sees Icarus Coot sitting at a table wearing an orange carnation on his tweed jacket, sipping tea with one pinky raised while reading Poetry Quarterly >
Sarkycow: A Heaven Host??? < Canned hysterics >
[typo] [ 03. June 2003, 05:20: Message edited by: Belisarius ]
-------------------- Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake. Andrew Knoll
Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001
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Icklicus Angelicus
Shipmate
# 3588
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Posted
<uncanned hysterics>
-------------------- LEGOLAS: The sky wears a film of gauze. The night air breathes infamy. Deceit weaves itself around my fingernails. (mollyringwraith)
Posts: 763 | From: Oxford / Devon | Registered: Nov 2002
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ChrisT
One of the Good Guys™
# 62
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Posted
PaulW - you know you want to, go on...
-------------------- Firmly on dry land
Posts: 6489 | From: Here, there and everywhere | Registered: May 2001
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