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Source: (consider it)
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Thread: I don't want to go to your wedding
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Golden Key
Shipmate
# 1468
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Posted
Re scent of cheese:
Saw one of Rick Steves' travel shows, where he went to France. He talked to a French woman about cheese, and she said a particular one "smells like the feet of angels". (Rather dramatically.)
I'm not sure how one would know that. Is that a particularly French way of speaking, or just hers? Or did she wash angels' socks?
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Blessed Gator, pray for us!
--"Oh bat bladders, do you have to bring common sense into this?" (Dragon, "Jane & the Dragon")
--"Oh, Peace Train, save this country!" (Yusuf/Cat Stevens, "Peace Train")
Posts: 18601 | From: Chilling out in an undisclosed, sincere pumpkin patch. | Registered: Oct 2001
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Golden Key
Shipmate
# 1468
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by lilBuddha:
quote:
Originally posted by simontoad:
oh no. There's a time and a place for chocolate. It's just that you can only do so much with it ![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
There’s your problem. Most of us just eat it.
Not gonna ask what you do...
Well, there are non-dessert and non-beverage uses, like Latin America mole' sauce.
And then there are...interesting...non-food uses (Time).
Best of all, the original TV MacGyver put it to an interesting use. (Pilot episode, 4th paragraph.) I don't know if that MacGyverism would work as is. In the original series, they left something out of any potentially dangerous MacGyverism, so that it wouldn't work.
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Blessed Gator, pray for us!
--"Oh bat bladders, do you have to bring common sense into this?" (Dragon, "Jane & the Dragon")
--"Oh, Peace Train, save this country!" (Yusuf/Cat Stevens, "Peace Train")
Posts: 18601 | From: Chilling out in an undisclosed, sincere pumpkin patch. | Registered: Oct 2001
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Dafyd
Shipmate
# 5549
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Sioni Sais:
quote:
Originally posted by Doc Tor:
I'm reasonably certain that there's no such thing as "too much cheese".
There's a quality bar. The late and much missed ken wrote a diatribe against "mild cheddar" illustrating this.
Doc Tor was talking about cheese.
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we remain, thanks to original sin, much in love with talking about, rather than with, one another. Rowan Williams
Posts: 10567 | From: Edinburgh | Registered: Feb 2004
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Karl: Liberal Backslider
Shipmate
# 76
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Doc Tor:
It's a marathon, not a sprint.
True. If you sprint it, then stage 2 can result in a particularly unpleasant illustration of how cottage cheese is made.
[ 26. October 2017, 10:25: Message edited by: Karl: Liberal Backslider ]
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Might as well ask the bloody cat.
Posts: 17938 | From: Chesterfield | Registered: May 2001
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Jane R
Shipmate
# 331
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Posted
cliffdweller: quote:
People have been shot for less than this.
Now, now. I know this is Hell, but let's be charitable here. Simontoad has clearly *never* tasted the Best Chocolate.
I find it difficult to choose between chocolate and cheese... but then, I don't have to!
[ 26. October 2017, 11:11: Message edited by: Jane R ]
Posts: 3958 | From: Jorvik | Registered: May 2001
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L'organist
Shipmate
# 17338
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Posted
But there is a special place in hell reserved for the inventer of "American Cheese" ![[Projectile]](graemlins/puke2.gif)
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Rara temporum felicitate ubi sentire quae velis et quae sentias dicere licet
Posts: 4950 | From: somewhere in England... | Registered: Sep 2012
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Jane R
Shipmate
# 331
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Posted
That is not cheese, that is extruded plastic.
Posts: 3958 | From: Jorvik | Registered: May 2001
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lilBuddha
Shipmate
# 14333
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Jane R:
That is not cheese, that is extruded plastic.
No, no, no, no. Plastic is useful. And probably contains more actual cheese.
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I put on my rockin' shoes in the morning
Hallellou, hallellou
Posts: 17627 | From: the round earth's imagined corners | Registered: Dec 2008
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lilBuddha
Shipmate
# 14333
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Golden Key:
quote:
Originally posted by lilBuddha:
quote:
Originally posted by simontoad:
oh no. There's a time and a place for chocolate. It's just that you can only do so much with it
There’s your problem. Most of us just eat it.
Not gonna ask what you do...
Well, there are non-dessert and non-beverage uses, like Latin America mole' sauce.
Still food and not all mole recipes include chocolate.
quote:
And then there are...interesting...non-food uses (Time).
Save for the Slip ‘n’ Slide and hamster bait, What isn't edible?
quote:
Best of all, the original TV MacGyver put it to an interesting use. (Pilot episode, 4th paragraph.) I don't know if that MacGyverism would work as is. In the original series, they left something out of any potentially dangerous MacGyverism, so that it wouldn't work.
Waste of chocolate. He had enough hair to absorb any quantity of acid.
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I put on my rockin' shoes in the morning
Hallellou, hallellou
Posts: 17627 | From: the round earth's imagined corners | Registered: Dec 2008
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cliffdweller
Shipmate
# 13338
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Golden Key:
cliffdweller--
But simontoad's disdain for chocolate means there's more left for *us*!
![[Yipee]](graemlins/spin.gif)
Oooh! Good point! Like when we tell our 2 year olds that cake is really nasty, we love you so we won't make you try it...
So, oh, yeah, we were wrong, don't bother with chocolate it's horrid, not worth the effort-- here's a bit of cheddar for you cuz I love you so much...
![[Two face]](graemlins/scot_twoface.gif)
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"Here is the world. Beautiful and terrible things will happen. Don't be afraid." -Frederick Buechner
Posts: 11242 | From: a small canyon overlooking the city | Registered: Jan 2008
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teddybear
Shipmate
# 7842
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Bishops Finger:
![[Killing me]](graemlins/killingme.gif)
Most seemly and edifying.....not!!
IJ
I attended a Baptist wedding where the minister invited the couple to exchange vowels. As near as I could tell, I was the only one that found it amusing. This was in the backwoods of the Missouri Ozarks.
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My cooking blog: http://inthekitchenwithdon.blogspot.com/
Posts: 480 | From: Topeka, Kansas USA | Registered: Jul 2004
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cliffdweller
Shipmate
# 13338
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by L'organist:
But there is a special place in hell reserved for the inventer of "American Cheese"
It is a blight upon our nation. Pity us.
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"Here is the world. Beautiful and terrible things will happen. Don't be afraid." -Frederick Buechner
Posts: 11242 | From: a small canyon overlooking the city | Registered: Jan 2008
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Sioni Sais
Shipmate
# 5713
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by L'organist:
But there is a special place in hell reserved for the inventer of "American Cheese"
At least some of it is named "Cheesefood" which implies that it isn't cheese.
I'm not sure it's food either.
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"He isn't Doctor Who, he's The Doctor"
(Paul Sinha, BBC)
Posts: 24276 | From: Newport, Wales | Registered: Apr 2004
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Fredegund
Shipmate
# 17952
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Posted
Dorothy L Sayers wrote of "that impassive pale substance known to the English as 'cheese' unqualified". Presumably a relation?
Whose Body - in case anyone wants to look it up.
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Pax et bonum
Posts: 117 | From: Shakespeare's County | Registered: Jan 2014
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Nick Tamen
Ship's Wayfaring Fool
# 15164
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Sioni Sais:
quote:
Originally posted by L'organist:
But there is a special place in hell reserved for the inventer of "American Cheese"
At least some of it is named "Cheesefood" which implies that it isn't cheese.
I'm not sure it's food either.
”American Processed Cheesefood Product,” to be precise. And they happily advertise that it’s made with “real milk.”
No. Just no.
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The first thing God says to Moses is, "Take off your shoes." We are on holy ground. Hard to believe, but the truest thing I know. — Anne Lamott
Posts: 2833 | From: On heaven-crammed earth | Registered: Sep 2009
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simontoad
Ship's Amphibian
# 18096
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Jane R:
cliffdweller: quote:
People have been shot for less than this.
Now, now. I know this is Hell, but let's be charitable here. Simontoad has clearly *never* tasted the Best Chocolate.
I find it difficult to choose between chocolate and cheese... but then, I don't have to!
I once purchased chocolate from the best chocolate shop in Brugge. We knew it was the best because it didn't have chocolate shaped like penises and breasts in the window. Seriously, there were these wonderful-looking shops all over the place, but they had this fetish for genitalia.
Look, chocolate is pretty great. It's just that you can only go so far with it. You play with the elements and you can achieve wonderful results. But people do so much more with cheese, in terms of variety of flavor and style. Its just no contest. The cheese platter in a silver service restaurant will net you a much richer food experience than anything else on the desert menu.
I was talking with a friend about this issue, and they reminded me of Chinese Chocolate. That trumps American cheese I reckon, even of the spray-on variety.
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Human
Posts: 1571 | From: Romsey, Vic, AU | Registered: May 2014
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simontoad
Ship's Amphibian
# 18096
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Posted
I just went and put this argument to my wife in the loungeroom. First, she just yelled "chocolate", then as I developed the argument she flipped me the bird. Then when I said the thing about silver service restaurants she returned to her book and said "Don't be absurd."
My wife is a pretty inactive member of the ship, but she won't let me disclose her user handle, as she doesn't want her reputation tarnished.
![[Axe murder]](graemlins/lovedrops.gif)
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Human
Posts: 1571 | From: Romsey, Vic, AU | Registered: May 2014
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cliffdweller
Shipmate
# 13338
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Posted
I should probably confess that I am in love with your wife.
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"Here is the world. Beautiful and terrible things will happen. Don't be afraid." -Frederick Buechner
Posts: 11242 | From: a small canyon overlooking the city | Registered: Jan 2008
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lilBuddha
Shipmate
# 14333
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by simontoad:
Look, chocolate is pretty great. It's just that you can only go so far with it.
Honestly, with all preferences aside, you know not of what you speak. The best chocolate will not be found in the gold standard establishments of yesteryear, not in the famous places. At best, those are merely good. The best, the innovations, take happen in the small places that push the boundaries. Not for the sake of pushing boundaries, but the sake of finding what is on the other side.
Those that do not merely shove a "flavour" inside the bon bon, but those who match the type chocolate with the essence of fruit and spice. Those who do not blend for homogeneity, but who exalt the single bean.
The masterpieces will be found in a small, seaside California village, a side street in a British city, in a French market, far away from the tourist crowds.
In fillings that make the tongue dance, in pastry creations that bring the senses to life.
And in savoury dishes like a Oaxacan mole sauce, a rich Texas chilli or a spice rub for a slow-roasted pork.
The reality of Chocolate is far more than your tiny imagination can conjure.
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I put on my rockin' shoes in the morning
Hallellou, hallellou
Posts: 17627 | From: the round earth's imagined corners | Registered: Dec 2008
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Sioni Sais
Shipmate
# 5713
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by lilBuddha:
quote:
Originally posted by simontoad:
Look, chocolate is pretty great. It's just that you can only go so far with it.
Honestly, with all preferences aside, you know not of what you speak. The best chocolate will not be found in the gold standard establishments of yesteryear, not in the famous places. At best, those are merely good. The best, the innovations, take happen in the small places that push the boundaries. Not for the sake of pushing boundaries, but the sake of finding what is on the other side.
Those that do not merely shove a "flavour" inside the bon bon, but those who match the type chocolate with the essence of fruit and spice. Those who do not blend for homogeneity, but who exalt the single bean.
The masterpieces will be found in a small, seaside California village, a side street in a British city, in a French market, far away from the tourist crowds.
In fillings that make the tongue dance, in pastry creations that bring the senses to life.
And in savoury dishes like a Oaxacan mole sauce, a rich Texas chilli or a spice rub for a slow-roasted pork.
The reality of Chocolate is far more than your tiny imagination can conjure.
True. There is (or at any rate was) such a shop in Tours on the Rue Colbert. It's not far from the Musee de Gemmail a must-see for glass enthusiasts.
Posts: 24276 | From: Newport, Wales | Registered: Apr 2004
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simontoad
Ship's Amphibian
# 18096
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Posted
Oh! Innovation is much overrated lil Buddha ![[Smile]](smile.gif)
I blush for my wife and myself ![[Hot and Hormonal]](icon_redface.gif)
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Human
Posts: 1571 | From: Romsey, Vic, AU | Registered: May 2014
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lilBuddha
Shipmate
# 14333
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by simontoad:
Oh! Innovation is much overrated lil Buddha
![[Confused]](confused.gif) “do so much more” = innovation, so why do you praise it in one post and deride it in this one?
Oh, I’m so sorry, my fault for using large words. Small words for small minds, lilB, and they might better comprehend. Doh! Understand. Argh!
Must make Small word, so him know what me say.
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I put on my rockin' shoes in the morning
Hallellou, hallellou
Posts: 17627 | From: the round earth's imagined corners | Registered: Dec 2008
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cliffdweller
Shipmate
# 13338
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Posted
lil Buddha has much knowledge. I will sit at your feet and learn from the master.
In particular... the name of the small seaside California establishment...?
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"Here is the world. Beautiful and terrible things will happen. Don't be afraid." -Frederick Buechner
Posts: 11242 | From: a small canyon overlooking the city | Registered: Jan 2008
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simontoad
Ship's Amphibian
# 18096
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Posted
Oh lilB. I'm only arguing the subject semi-seriously, as my sequential posts indicate. After all, there's no accounting for taste: vis. Dr Pepper and Cherry Cola.
What are you doing?
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Human
Posts: 1571 | From: Romsey, Vic, AU | Registered: May 2014
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lilBuddha
Shipmate
# 14333
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Posted
Defending the honour of Chocolate!
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I put on my rockin' shoes in the morning
Hallellou, hallellou
Posts: 17627 | From: the round earth's imagined corners | Registered: Dec 2008
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Jane R
Shipmate
# 331
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Posted
But you're doing it wrong. Let the poor deluded fool continue to believe that the best chocolate is to be found in tourist shops in Belgium. That leaves more of the good stuff for us true chocolate aficionados.
Posts: 3958 | From: Jorvik | Registered: May 2001
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RooK
1 of 6
# 1852
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Posted
If any of you idiots try to bribe me with cheese, I'll ban the fucking lot of you.
Chocolate, motherfuckers.
Posts: 15274 | From: Portland, Oregon, USA, Earth | Registered: Nov 2001
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Boogie
Boogie on down!
# 13538
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by RooK:
If any of you idiots try to bribe me with cheese, I'll ban the fucking lot of you.
Chocolate, motherfuckers.
Just for you RooK ![[Angel]](graemlins/angel.gif)
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Garden. Room. Walk
Posts: 13030 | From: Boogie Wonderland | Registered: Mar 2008
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Karl: Liberal Backslider
Shipmate
# 76
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Boogie:
quote:
Originally posted by RooK:
If any of you idiots try to bribe me with cheese, I'll ban the fucking lot of you.
Chocolate, motherfuckers.
Just for you RooK
You. Yes, you, lassie. Go and stand in the corner. Now. And have a good hard think about what you just did.
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Might as well ask the bloody cat.
Posts: 17938 | From: Chesterfield | Registered: May 2001
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Karl: Liberal Backslider
Shipmate
# 76
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Posted
I think someone ought to be writing out "I must not mix cheese and chocolate" a thousand times before she goes home.
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Might as well ask the bloody cat.
Posts: 17938 | From: Chesterfield | Registered: May 2001
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jacobsen
seeker
# 14998
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Boogie:
My DIL had a £30 dress off eBay - she looked amazing, as did her bridesmaids with dresses of the same price.
Here she is.
Eager to see the pics, Boogie, but denied entrance to the site.
![[Waterworks]](graemlins/bawling.gif)
[ 01. November 2017, 21:16: Message edited by: jacobsen ]
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But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon
Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy
The man who made time, made plenty.
Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009
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Eutychus
From the edge
# 3081
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Posted
Chocolate, no. But then again, this ![[Overused]](graemlins/notworthy.gif)
(probably considered an abomination by my compatriots, never lasted long enough when brought back from the UK to find out)
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Let's remember that we are to build the Kingdom of God, not drive people away - pastor Frank Pomeroy
Posts: 17944 | From: 528491 | Registered: Jul 2002
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simontoad
Ship's Amphibian
# 18096
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Posted
fruit and cheese, the stuff of life.
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Human
Posts: 1571 | From: Romsey, Vic, AU | Registered: May 2014
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Karl: Liberal Backslider
Shipmate
# 76
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by simontoad:
fruit and cheese, the stuff of life.
But not together. Is evil.
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Might as well ask the bloody cat.
Posts: 17938 | From: Chesterfield | Registered: May 2001
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Curiosity killed ...
Ship's Mug
# 11770
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Posted
There are some amazing mixtures of fruit and cheese: apples with decent cheddar and/or Wensleydale, grapes with brie, figs and feta, pears and Stilton, ...
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Mugs - Keep the Ship afloat
Posts: 13794 | From: outiside the outer ring road | Registered: Aug 2006
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Karl: Liberal Backslider
Shipmate
# 76
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Posted
Doesn't work for me. Just spoils the cheese. Don't hold with mixing sweet and savoury; the result always jars my taste buds.
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Might as well ask the bloody cat.
Posts: 17938 | From: Chesterfield | Registered: May 2001
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RooK
1 of 6
# 1852
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Posted
It occurs to me that we've inadvertently wandered into rich metaphorical territory describing marriage. Well done, freaks.
Posts: 15274 | From: Portland, Oregon, USA, Earth | Registered: Nov 2001
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Rossweisse
High Church Valkyrie
# 2349
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by L'organist:
But there is a special place in hell reserved for the inventer of "American Cheese"
If you want to experience something really hellish, you should try St. Louis-style pizza, topped with an abominable substance called "provel" that makes Velveeta look like the stuff of cheesy dreams. It sticks to the teeth and to the hard palate; it annoys the natives when I ask them whether provel is a member of the wax family or the plastic family.
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I'm not dead yet.
Posts: 15117 | From: Valhalla | Registered: Feb 2002
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simontoad
Ship's Amphibian
# 18096
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Posted
There's a chain mexican fast food place that puts Parmesan or something approaching that on its shells. Truly awful.
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Human
Posts: 1571 | From: Romsey, Vic, AU | Registered: May 2014
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Augustine the Aleut
Shipmate
# 1472
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Twilight:
quote:
Originally posted by simontoad:
There was a full bottle of Johnny Walker Red on each table at the start of the night.
I can't get over this. To someone like my husband who can't resist anything free, such a set-up could prove deadly.
At the Chinese wedding I most recently attended in Toronto, the table had full bottles of Chivas, Canadian Club, and Hennessy cognac-- I stuck to the Moet et Chandon, and had that bottle to myself. There were several businessmen from China at the table (I was at least seated with the bride's cousin, a very pleasant nephrologist from Nanaimo, so I could at least converse, my Cantonese being as bad as my mandarin) consuming the bottles' contents uncut in tumblers. There were no fights, but the volume level rose considerably. The bride's father, having paid for it all (300 guests), gave me an ecological tote bag with five bottles as I left.
I won't even mention the Palestinian wedding I attended in North York two years ago, where each table was provided with a bottle of arak, as well as one of Lebanese brandy, so that we could toast each other during the long speeches. As with the Chinese wedding, no fights, but the dancing was most animated, the grannies kicking up their heels with the rest of them. For some reason, my table featured the two lesbian lawyers with whom the bride had maintained a running relationship for a few years. The arak, I should mention, was powerful stuff and loosened tongues remarkably.
Protestant weddings in the Ottawa valley are dry, of course, and one has to go out behind the church hall where cousin Garnet and the others are pouring rye from mickeys (small bottles of a size which can fit in a jacket pocket) into their cups of coffee-- it's not that bad with egg salad sandwiches. Anglican weddings, where wine can be found on the table, are deemed as godless and decadent, and the bride clearly no better than she ought to be.
Posts: 6236 | From: Ottawa, Canada | Registered: Oct 2001
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simontoad
Ship's Amphibian
# 18096
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Posted
brilliant, the whole lot of it.
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Human
Posts: 1571 | From: Romsey, Vic, AU | Registered: May 2014
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Pangolin Guerre
Shipmate
# 18686
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Posted
Augustine, it reminds me of the joke about a recently deceased who goes to heaven, and St Peter is showing him around (I won't go through the entire joke), and in each room a group is doing something that had been forbidden them in this life. The Jews are having a fantastic pig roast, in another room the Baptists are dancing up a storm, etc. Then St Peter shows him another room where there are a group of people sitting in a circle in silence, doing nothing. "Who are they?" "Them? Oh, they're the Anglicans."
Posts: 758 | From: 30 arpents de neige | Registered: Nov 2016
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Stercus Tauri
Shipmate
# 16668
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Posted
We were at a dinner concert put on by some Anglicans a year or two ago, and one of them at our table conceded, "We'd all be Presbyterian if it wasn't for the music".
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Thay haif said. Quhat say thay, Lat thame say (George Keith, 5th Earl Marischal)
Posts: 905 | From: On the traditional lands of the Six Nations. | Registered: Sep 2011
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Meconopsis
Apprentice
# 18146
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by simontoad:
There was a full bottle of Johnny Walker Red on each table at the start of the night.
I went to an Armenian wedding long ago (in Los Angeles), and for about every 8 people, there was (good) white wine, red wine, good whiskey & good gin. As soon as a bottle was empty, it was replaced.
The bride's mother had spent the previous day making the meal - the lamb tasted like filet mignon.
Posts: 31 | Registered: Jun 2014
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Sioni Sais
Shipmate
# 5713
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Meconopsis:
quote:
Originally posted by simontoad:
There was a full bottle of Johnny Walker Red on each table at the start of the night.
I went to an Armenian wedding long ago (in Los Angeles), and for about every 8 people, there was (good) white wine, red wine, good whiskey & good gin. As soon as a bottle was empty, it was replaced.
The bride's mother had spent the previous day making the meal - the lamb tasted like filet mignon.
With all that hooch, boiled cardboard would have tasted good.
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"He isn't Doctor Who, he's The Doctor"
(Paul Sinha, BBC)
Posts: 24276 | From: Newport, Wales | Registered: Apr 2004
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Piglet
Islander
# 11803
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Meconopsis:
... the lamb tasted like filet mignon.
I'd prefer it tasting like lamb!
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I may not be on an island any more, but I'm still an islander.
alto n a soprano who can read music
Posts: 20272 | From: Fredericton, NB, on a rather larger piece of rock | Registered: Sep 2006
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jacobsen
seeker
# 14998
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Posted
Lamb is the food of the gods. Along with olives and red wine. I didn't really appreciate lamb till I lived in Germany, where you need to go to an American steak house or Middle Eastern restaurant to get it. In Yorkshire, where I grew up, we had it so often that I hardly noticed it. Sad.
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But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon
Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy
The man who made time, made plenty.
Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009
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