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Source: (consider it)
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Thread: Heaven: SoF Idol
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Sarkycow
La belle Dame sans merci
# 1012
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Posted
Sine, honey, do you really think that's a smart question? Do try not to antgonise Stoo until the competition is over. I'd hate you to ruin your chances.
Why don't you take this waiting time, and use it to practise your different posting styles? I'm confident that you'll make it through to the next round, and I'd love to see how you handle some of the other boards ![[Smile]](smile.gif)
Sarkycow, Judge
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“Just because your voice reaches halfway around the world doesn't mean you are wiser than when it reached only to the end of the bar.”
Posts: 10787 | Registered: Jul 2001
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Grits
Compassionate fundamentalist
# 4169
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Posted
Yeah, that one's gonna cost you, Sine.
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Lord, fill my mouth with worthwhile stuff, and shut it when I've said enough. Amen.
Posts: 8419 | From: Nashville, TN | Registered: Feb 2003
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Sine Nomine*
Ship's backstabbing bastard
# 3631
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Sarkycow:
Sine, honey, do you really think that's a smart question? Do try not to antgonise Stoo until the competition is over.
Oh come on, people. Surely I'm not the only one who thought Stoo was mocking HRH of Wales' recent comments about modern education?
Then again, maybe I am. The only other website I spend as much time on is "Current Royal News".
Posts: 10696 | Registered: Dec 2002
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Stoo
Mighty Pirate
# 254
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Posted
I'm qualified because I was born into the business.
My father was a host, as was his and as was his.
In my time, I've trained many a poster to produce Number 1 OPs.
I know a good post when I see one. It's my business.
Stoo, Judge
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This space left blank
Posts: 5266 | From: the director of "Bikini Traffic School" | Registered: May 2001
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Rossweisse
High Church Valkyrie
# 2349
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Stoo:
Actually, Ruth, I would recommend that you just give up and go home.
Perhaps you could take Rossweisse with you. Maybe it would help to calm you both down. ...
Ruth, we did it -- our acts were so good that a judge actually thought we were posting seriously, rather than in (assumed) character.
Win or lose, that makes it all worthwhile!
Rossweisse // yes, yes, I'm assuming "lose" ![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
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I'm not dead yet.
Posts: 15117 | From: Valhalla | Registered: Feb 2002
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duchess
Ship's Blue Blooded Lady
# 2764
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Posted
I did my post just to entertain, I don't expect to win. I did not expect the lectures from the judges but I am sure it was for the common good. Glad to see I hit a tender spot thinking of a limey prez. Blair would make an excellnt POTUK (UK would have it's old empire back...c'mon...you know secretly you want that to be true).
I wouldn't mind, being part limey myself and enjoying a homemade scone myself. Bring it on.
Limeyland rox. I mean Great Britain owning the world. Thx. ![[Yipee]](graemlins/spin.gif) ![[Axe murder]](graemlins/lovedrops.gif)
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♬♭ We're setting sail to the place on the map from which nobody has ever returned ♫♪♮
Ship of Fools-World Party
Posts: 11197 | From: Do you know the way? | Registered: May 2002
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Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32
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Posted
ANNOUCEMENT
The Poll has closed and its results have been copied and stored (please e-mail me if you wish to see the results).
We regret to announce that Sir Kevin lost this Elimination Round.
Of the Nine remaining Elimination Rounds, the next Two will provide a chance for Contestants to gain Immunity. Each Judge will include a score with his/her evaluation:
- 0 = Unacceptable
- 1 = Below Average
- 2 = Adequate
- 3 = Good or Better
In Elimination Round #2, all Contestants with a Total Score of 6 or higher will be granted Immunity; in Elimination Round #3, the Total Score must be 7 or higher.
There will be no Immunity granted in any of the following Rounds.
And now:
THIS ROUND'S CHALLENGE
Each Contestant must post an impressively cutting put-down to someone (like "Jerk," for example*) in Hell without resorting to profanity. The Thread subject is up to the Contestant, as is the mood (high sarcasm, controlled loathing, etc.).
* Courtesy of Mike Reed's Flame Warriors.
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Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake.
Andrew Knoll
Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001
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Sine Nomine*
Ship's backstabbing bastard
# 3631
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Belisarius:
(like "Jerk," for example*)
OMG! ![[Eek!]](eek.gif) It's moi. Even down to the cigarette. I feel so shamed.
Posts: 10696 | Registered: Dec 2002
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Vikki Pollard
Shipmate
# 5548
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Sine Nomine:
quote:
Originally posted by Belisarius:
(like "Jerk," for example*)
OMG! It's moi. Even down to the cigarette. I feel so shamed.
![[Killing me]](graemlins/killingme.gif)
Oh Sine! It IS you in Will&Grace!! I knew it!
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"I don't get all this fuss about global warming, Miss. Why doesn't the Government just knock down all the f**king greenhouses?" (One of my slightly less bright 15 year old pupils)
Posts: 5695 | From: The Far Side | Registered: Feb 2004
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Vikki Pollard
Shipmate
# 5548
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Posted
Prompted by the thread, ‘Divine right to Shag’
originally posted by Coitus Continuous
quote:
Who do you think you are, some anally-retentive b*tch with the right to dictate my morals? What is your problem with me?
I’ve had it with you.
Or rather, I haven’t – and maybe that’s your problem with me? You seem to think that just because you feel free to leap into bed with as many Shipmates as possible, we should all be doing the same. And when a dissenting voice or two is heard, you then feel free to shoot them down in flames. OK. That’s your right. It’s my right to reply. Since you seem to be interested, here (in no particular order) are my comments about your behaviour on these boards.
Contrary to what you seem to believe, I have no objection to your morals. I just don’t particularly want to hear about them over breakfast. ![[Projectile]](graemlins/puke2.gif)
I don’t think ‘in the interests of research’, however funny you find it, is a good enough excuse for your nefarious activity. It would have to be a dull day on the Shipping forecast before your research into ANYthing was more interesting than watching paint dry.
I think waiting 3 years before admitting that you have been to Shipmeets all over the world in order to bed innocent victims was far too long. 6 months would have been kinder all round, especially to those poor women in the foursome. How COULD you put those photos on the Net? How DARE you put a link from All Saints under the title, “Sisterly Love”? Have you any idea what you have done to that community of Benedictine Nuns in Idaho who were trying out Google for the first time?
I think the blurb on the back cover of your book (and I quote), “See how these Christians love one another!” is a gratuitous perversion of Scripture. I also think the photos were disgusting and unedifying, except perhaps the joke one of you standing in front of the alligator pool – I grant you, that was quite amusing.
For me, the last straw was your very detailed account of your last five encounters (at a SHIP WEDDING, for heaven’s sake!) with a poll for people to vote on the best. Tacky? That’s an insult to tack. Self-respect? You obviously don’t know the meaning of the word – but respect for others is an integral part of this community, and IMHO you don’t deserve a place in it any more. You are a self-obsessed, self-important, slimy, skanky, uncaring, probably STD-carrying piece of scum. And so, for that matter, are the 43 people who voted. ![[Mad]](angryfire.gif)
BTW I notice YOUR genitals appear to be the only ones not featured in the many photographs in your book. Is it possible they are so small they don’t show up on film?
Anally retentive? MOI? Hah! I’d keep all your back-door exits (and entrances?) well-closed if I were you, or you might just find a computer keyboard jammed up there so far that you’ll need the services of a very understanding proctologist. Quickly. Because my prediction is you’re gonna be walking that plank so fast you may not even get chance to read this. Good riddance.
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"I don't get all this fuss about global warming, Miss. Why doesn't the Government just knock down all the f**king greenhouses?" (One of my slightly less bright 15 year old pupils)
Posts: 5695 | From: The Far Side | Registered: Feb 2004
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Chorister
Completely Frocked
# 473
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Posted
Quoted from the thread, 'Quenching the Spirit', by Rev320:
quote:
Only when we rid the church of traditional church choirs will the Holy Spirit be able to move freely in the land
I woke up this morning to see a hand of fire, burning the following message into my ceiling:
'Go ye into all the land and use Rev320 as a butt-wipe. The Holy Spirit™ hath spoken. P.S. I love church choirs ![[Cool]](cool.gif) '
Get thee behind me Satan.
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Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.
Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001
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Goldfish Stew
Shipmate
# 5512
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Posted
context: in the midst of a hellish debate about conventional medicine and alternative therapies for cancer
quote:
Originally posted by Whine:
My how things have deteriorated in this discussion. I guess it's only to be expected the way you people have all been brainwashed by the medical profession (you cannot trust doctors, who have all been influenced and bribed by the pharmaceutical companies.) I wholly recommend this website and any of the books sold on that site. They are well researched and insightful reviews of all the medical literature on the subject.
Petal, you and your fellow proponents of such conspiracy theories are to intelligent debate what Stephen Hawking is to tap-dancing.
Get a grip man. I have seen some of these books and they are clearly aimed at the section of the market whose parents should not have been allowed to breed. I assume by "well researched" you mean "had lots of footnotes."¹ The fact is, most of the journal articles that they cite not only fail to back up the point that your beloved "researchers" are trying to make,² but actually prove the precise opposite.³ But then again, given the intellect of their average disciple they could get away with printing any old rubbish. Wait a minute, they already are.
Your constant churlish attacks on the medical profession prove nothing about the profession, but plenty about your personality. In fact, if you were any more anally retentive you'd have to defecate by caesarean.
Enjoy the weather in Coventry.
Kiwi
ps. Sorry to see that the brain transplant failed.
Footnotes
¹ added to prove to Whine that this must be true.
² ditto
³ so I can only conclude that you see the little footnote number and assume that that makes it absolutely true.
[ 28. November 2004, 19:59: Message edited by: kiwigoldfish ]
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Posts: 2405 | From: Aotearoa/New Zealand | Registered: Feb 2004
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Rossweisse
High Church Valkyrie
# 2349
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Posted
Calling The Jerk to Hell
I keep trying to ignore you, Jerk, but you just won't be ignored, will you? Like my infant daughter, you keep defecating into the hand that's attempting to clean your foul, noisome, poop-covered bottom -- but unlike said infant, who at least has the potential to grow into a worthwhile human being, you will never be anything but a bad example to the rest of humanity, or what passes for it online.
Which was the post that finally forced me to acknowledge your general and all-encompassing loathesomeness? Was it those ghastly chemotherapy jokes posted on the All Saints cancer thread? Was it the link to an abattoir that you stuck on the "Why I Love Fluffy Bunnies" thread in Heaven? Was it your sniggering sophomoric sexual references ("Just step over them," "Oh, get a room!" and so forth) when two posters -- who happened to be male and female (one of each) -- got into a disagreement over the true nature and relevance of the Real Presence in the "Munching Jesus" thread in Purgatory? Was it your willingness to pile on with vile ad hominem attacks and to flame at random when Hapless Newbie found himself called to Hell?
[Rhetorical Question alert!]
It was all of these, and more. Sarcasm and mean-spiritedness can be amusing....in small doses. But by constantly dumping a Giant Economy-Size Industrial-Strength box of self-aggrandizing sarcasm and low-grade mean-spiritedness on us, you've gone far beyond amusement. The Internet is full of shooting galleries. By turning the Ship into your private target range, you have gone too far.
You are a deservedly friendless lump of greasy excrement, a boil upon the bottom of Humankind, Screwtape's favorite potential nummy, a stinking bottomless ashtray whose very presence sets off smoke alarms, and a complete and total waste of DNA.
And I have No Opinion of you.
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I'm not dead yet.
Posts: 15117 | From: Valhalla | Registered: Feb 2002
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RooK
1 of 6
# 1852
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Belisarius:
THIS ROUND'S CHALLENGE
Each Contestant must post an impressively cutting put-down to someone (like "Jerk," for example*) in Hell without resorting to profanity. The Thread subject is up to the Contestant, as is the mood (high sarcasm, controlled loathing, etc.).
All right, who put you up to this? Which of the other Admins casually suggested to you that it would be amusing for this array of quivering-nosed dewey-eyed fluffy bunnies to try even pretend to Hellishly cut someone down?
Yes, Belly-bel, I realize you participated in the thought. The absurdly obvious restriction about invective is clearly something that you would consider a "contribution", even though I suspect that this aspect was omitted from the original idea. In all likelihood, the idea of furiously snarling runny-babbits so delighted your child-like mind that it was natural for you to forget the basic limitations of this forum. That you caught this idea and clarified the requirement without even realizing just how ridiculous it made the whole proposition is really... well, it's just like you.
But, I'm sure you can recall one of your cohorts involved with the original idea. Now listen carefully: they were setting you up to look like an idiot. Again. Please allow this to notch that rusty clockwork you use for a brain ahead enough cogs so that can realize that you should be angry about this. Let me help you get even.
Just don't start blubbing. I can't stand it when you start blubbering.
Posts: 15274 | From: Portland, Oregon, USA, Earth | Registered: Nov 2001
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Left at the Altar
Ship's Siren
# 5077
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Posted
Normally I ignore you, Jerk. I figure that anyone who posts the drivel that you post is having us all on.
But you are not, are you? You are actually a really sad little twerp who believes what he writes is (a) true, (b) worthy and (c)witty.
In fact, what you write is (a)rubbish, (b) worthless rubbish and (c) turgid, dull rubbish. To the extent that it makes anyone laugh, rest assured that they laugh at you, not with you.
Tommorrow I will go back to ignoring you, but for now, take comfort in the fact that your post has raised my ire. I'm angry because what you write is not on paper and (sadly) I find that cannot wipe my backside with my computer screen.
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Still pretty Amazing, but no longer Mavis.
Posts: 9111 | Registered: Oct 2003
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Sine Nomine*
Ship's backstabbing bastard
# 3631
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by RooK:
I'm sure you can recall one of your cohorts involved with the original idea. Now listen carefully: they were setting you up to look like an idiot. Again. Please allow this to notch that rusty clockwork you use for a brain ahead enough cogs so that can realize that you should be angry about this. Let me help you get even.
You know, Miss CeeCee, you really are a piece of work. Hosts and Admins were specifically prohibited from taking part in this competition. But you just couldn't stand it, could you? You have posted not once, but twice where you had no business posting at all.
What is it with you? You mock and ridicule Heaven and fluffy bunnies, but as soon as there's some attention to be garnered, you're up here like a shot screaming "Look at me! Look at me! Don't forget little WooKie! Me! Me! Me! I'm so clever. Please tell me I'm clever!"
Well, hon, get a grip. You're not. You're just a pathetic, bald, emotionally needy Canuckistani who couldn't even get a job in his own pathetic country and had emigrate (doubtlessly illegally) to a real nation to find employment.
I really suspect Bel can run these boards and this competitionn without your "help". So why don't you trot on back to Hell where you can ponce around to the admiring comments of your ass-licking little clique of so-called "denizens".
We don't need you up here. Really we don't.
And by the way...nobody really believes you about your mythical girlfriend or your mythical car. Most of us stopped making things up to appear cool when we were sixteen or so. While I realize that is your approximate emotional age, it doesn't become you. Anymore than those kinky drawings and jejune poetry on your website do.
God, you're weird. Weird and pathetic. What a freak.
Posts: 10696 | Registered: Dec 2002
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Quizmaster
Quick quipper
# 1435
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Posted
ALL SAINTS
"The Bad Ideas Meet"
All those who want to meet up, have a few beers and discuss how many more bad ideas Belisarius can come up with should gather on Saturday at the pub in London.
Please bring all your bad ideas with you!
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The more questions I ask the more I ask fewer questions.
OR=========================================
The wise person does not know all the answers, but always asks the right questions.
Posts: 3326 | From: Exeter, Devon | Registered: Oct 2001
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dolphy
Lady of Perpetual Responsiblity
# 862
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Posted
OP from dolphy descends into hell
I can not believe you have forced me to do this, you low life, you butt boil, you pimple on the face of society. You reckon that you stand a chance? - think again you evil scheming sockmuppet. I am calling you here to be flame grilled, roasted and pulled to pieces, chewed up by the animals and then spat out again. You and your pathetic postings, you have not got a clue have you? You come in here, paint a great big target on your fat arse and then run away wimpering when you are shot. Scared now are you?, well you better be...be afraid, be very afraid. If I were you, I would run back home to Mummy, failing that, go play a game in the Circus, go post on the random thread if your intellect is up to it. Better start saying your prayers kid, you're gonna need them. If you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen coz it sure looks like dolphin is on the menu tonight.
(Yes, I have sent myself a pm).
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Looking forward to my rock moving closer again.
Posts: 15134 | From: my camper van | Registered: Jul 2001
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Chorister
Completely Frocked
# 473
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Posted
Doesn't sound much like 'self-preservation' to me.... ![[Disappointed]](graemlins/disappointed.gif) ![[Biased]](wink.gif)
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Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.
Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001
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dolphy
Lady of Perpetual Responsiblity
# 862
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Posted
![[Razz]](tongue.gif) Hell hath no fury like a dolphin scorned ![[Two face]](graemlins/scot_twoface.gif)
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Looking forward to my rock moving closer again.
Posts: 15134 | From: my camper van | Registered: Jul 2001
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duchess
Ship's Blue Blooded Lady
# 2764
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by babybear:
I suggest "sucky machine" or "This robot sucks (TRS)".
Gort, you are starting to sound like the love-bot of Marvin the Paranoid Anderoid and Kryton from Red Dwarf... You are going to end up in therapy.
Calling babybear to Hell
You wanton stumpet when it comes to posting! How dare you flaunt yourself all over the place, like you are so cute and cuddly, when deep down, we all know you want to let loose and stab somebody with those knitting needles and shears!
Acting like you are so kind...you are evil to the core in your coal black Welsh heart, thinking you are hot *BLEEP* on a silver platter when you are really cold *BLEEP* on a paper-plate!
Telling the Gort-one that he needs therapy...all he needs is a vacation from your helpful lectures of Jung. And no, I am not over-reacting, not a bit. I am dead serious. For reals.
Hmph! Momma wasn't born yesterday ...I know you hate me with a brutal apathetic fashion just because I am not Welsh* and further more, because I am a Calivinist. Well let me tell you, there are no thin places left for you! No thin places! God took them away...away from YOU!
So go and knit me a bear, see if I care. ![[Waterworks]](graemlins/bawling.gif)
Word to the mother.
*except for 1/16th but that doesn't count because it ain't good enough for the likes of you.
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♬♭ We're setting sail to the place on the map from which nobody has ever returned ♫♪♮
Ship of Fools-World Party
Posts: 11197 | From: Do you know the way? | Registered: May 2002
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babybear
Bear faced and cheeky with it
# 34
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by duchess:
*except for 1/16th but that doesn't count because it ain't good enough for the likes of you.
::snigger:: You are more Welsh than me then. I just live here and speak the lingo.
[ 29. November 2004, 17:33: Message edited by: babybear ]
Posts: 13287 | From: Cottage of the 3 Bears (and The Gremlin) | Registered: May 2001
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Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32
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Posted
IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT
Because RuthW has officially reacquired Moderator Status, we regret to announce that she is disqualified from further participation in SoF Idol.
"Wild Card" auditions* start immediately and will continue for approximately 24 hours. The highest-scoring newcomer will take Ruth's place (in the event of a tie, a separate poll will be set up).
ETA: * An OP for any Board, as per the previous round.
[ 29. November 2004, 17:48: Message edited by: Belisarius ]
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Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake.
Andrew Knoll
Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001
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Robert Armin
All licens'd fool
# 182
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Posted
Purgatory: Decimilisation is the root of all evil
It amazes me that this important topic has never come up before. Surely it is clear that ever sonce our glorious country abandoned the Imperial System we have been in free fall, without God's blessing upon us? Metrication is based on an arbitary whim - in the entire cosmos why shoud a precentage of the earth's diameter be important? Yards, feet and inches are grounded in the human frame, wshich God declared "very good" in Genesis, and "a little lower than the angels" in Psalms.
Pounds, shillings and pence are inhernetly more Christian than decimal currency because you can be more generous with them. If you have 10p you can divide them between, 10, 5 or 2 people. If youy have 12d (the glorious shilling) you can share them with 12, 6, 3, 4 or 2 people - it is a system with built in benevolence. What is more, if God had wanted us to use base 10, wouldn't he have called 10 tribes of Israel? Or 10 apostles? And did he? I think not!
Metrication is clealry the work of heathen nations, the sort of thing we are commanded to refrain from in Leviticus. When will we rise up as a nation, repent of our pagan practises, and return to the ways of our godly forefathers?
[Not a patch on Ruth's, I freely admit - I am sad that she cannot take part any longer.]
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Keeping fit was an obsession with Fr Moity .... He did chin ups in the vestry, calisthenics in the pulpit, and had developed a series of Tai-Chi exercises to correspond with ritual movements of the Mass. The Antipope Robert Rankin
Posts: 8927 | From: In the pack | Registered: May 2001
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Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Sine Nomine:
You know, Miss CeeCee, you really are a piece of work. Hosts and Admins were specifically prohibited from taking part in this competition. But you just couldn't stand it, could you? You have posted not once, but twice where you had no business posting at all.
< snip >
God, you're weird. Weird and pathetic. What a freak.
Now, Sine, don't be so hard on him. We all have our contradictory impulses that need outlets, though most of us find the latter in Real Life.
RooK surely must realize that some of the most cutting posts in the History of this Ship have been faultlessly polite. I don't want to believe he could be really be full of such self-destructive hostility--what a horrible life that would be for him! It's all part of his comically effective Atheist persona he's put so much time and effort in cultivating (and much appreciated, honestly).
RooK--I hope Sine's reaction shows that you've let your enthusiasm carry you a little too far. You don't need to perform for us all the time. I know you're scared of losing an excuse for people not to like you--that maybe people won't like the real you--but trust me, you'll feel so much better not hiding behind a mask all the time. We won't judge--we're here for you. Don't be afraid.
(Surprised none of the contestants took the False Pity route)
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Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake.
Andrew Knoll
Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001
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Vikki Pollard
Shipmate
# 5548
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Posted
Hell isn't my natural habitat. I'm just too forgiving... ![[Angel]](graemlins/angel.gif)
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"I don't get all this fuss about global warming, Miss. Why doesn't the Government just knock down all the f**king greenhouses?" (One of my slightly less bright 15 year old pupils)
Posts: 5695 | From: The Far Side | Registered: Feb 2004
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RooK
1 of 6
# 1852
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Posted
Belisarius, you've shown me the error of my ways, bless your heart. I am utterly changed by your heroic efforts. Your kind and forgiving treatment of me should be a lesson for all.
Posts: 15274 | From: Portland, Oregon, USA, Earth | Registered: Nov 2001
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duchess
Ship's Blue Blooded Lady
# 2764
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Posted
quote:
Originally waxed and considered out-loud by RooK:
Belisarius, you've shown me the error of my ways, bless your heart. I am utterly changed by your heroic efforts. Your kind and forgiving treatment of me should be a lesson for all.
Stop it unless it's for reals you sick maple-leaf, the conversion thang. You are such a tease for Jesus.
[ ]
[ 30. November 2004, 01:14: Message edited by: duchess ]
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♬♭ We're setting sail to the place on the map from which nobody has ever returned ♫♪♮
Ship of Fools-World Party
Posts: 11197 | From: Do you know the way? | Registered: May 2002
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Alfred E. Neuman
What? Me worry?
# 6855
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Posted
Heaven
(Hosted by: The Coot jr., Stoo jr., KenWritez jr.)
Great-Great Grandson of TDA is Born...
__________________________________________________________
Posted 29 November, 2018 23:35
__________________________________________________________
Since our last dating thread reached 25 pages and has been closed...again...I thought someone should make an attempt to bolster the fading hope of all my lonely geriatric friends out there who, after all these years, have yet to find that someone special. So, with faith in Christ that my desperate plea will be answered, I once again start this thread.
As many of you know, when duchess left me last year to enter the Convent of Saint Sappho of Lesvos, I have been without a companion. Please know that in spite of how things appear with regard to our breakup, I really am still a decent person and all those rumours of cult rituals and flagellation are completely false.
Anyway, I'm still available...anyone want to flirt or meet me in the Cafe?
__________________________________________________________
Posts: 102,326 - From: Babbling Creek Rest Home - Registered: May 2004 - IP: Unknown
Posts: 12954 | Registered: May 2004
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Sine Nomine*
Ship's backstabbing bastard
# 3631
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Posted
(I'm having a little trouble wrapping my brain around the concept of "The Coot, Jr.")
Posts: 10696 | Registered: Dec 2002
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Alfred E. Neuman
What? Me worry?
# 6855
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Posted
He father was involved with 'gene therapy' in 2012.
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--Formerly: Gort--
Posts: 12954 | Registered: May 2004
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RuthW
liberal "peace first" hankie squeezer
# 13
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Belisarius:
Because RuthW has officially reacquired Moderator Status, we regret to announce that she is disqualified from further participation in SoF Idol.
They're suddenly short-handed in Purgatory, I offer (out of the goodness of my heart) to help out for a little while, and you seize the opportunity to throw me out of the SoF Idol competition. It figures. I knew this would happen.
quote:
Originally posted by Medusa:
And I'm here to tell you, Ship of Fools is totally complicit. Who are the hosts of Heaven, where all good Christians supposedly go when they die? All men. Who owns the whole enterprise? A man. If I lose this contest, it'll be because a man is running it.
Admit the truth. Seven of the original contestants are wimmun, with only four mere males. You blew it when you chose two of my sistahs to be judges--just goes to show the inherent weakness in the masculine system--and two of the three people who won immunity don't have that extraneous Y chromosome. Then the first Elimination Poll booted Sir Kevin, and you and Stoo finally woke up and realized that in a fair fight, you guys are gonna lose.
So you two pull an all-nighter, read the fine print, and think up a way to rid yourselves of a troublesome wumin. This is how it's always done. You fear our strength, so you work the system--the system you set up in the first place--to your own advantage, because it's the only way you can perpetuate your power to oppress us.
Well, think again, you misogynistic pipsqueaks. You are right to be afraid of us. We wymun are going to take over, and your narrow-minded, rule-bound, hair-splitting days are numbered.
Shoulders picket sign reading "SoF Idol Unfair to Wymmun" on the front and "Down with Amerikkkan Imperialist Dogs" on the back, and begins marching up and down in front of SoF Idol competition venue.
Posts: 24453 | From: La La Land | Registered: Apr 2001
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John Donne
Renaissance Man
# 220
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Posted
[There is hysterical (manly) crying at the news that RuthW has been eliminated. A flurry of Y-fronts with 'Ruthie' written on them in builder's masonry crayon are thrown to the stage]
Posts: 13667 | From: Perth, W.A. | Registered: May 2001
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Alfred E. Neuman
What? Me worry?
# 6855
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Posted
Upon reading RuthW's powerful argument against the the subjugation of wymmin and for the crushing guilt I'm feeling in attempting to replace her, I hereby withdraw my post and join the picket line!
To the ramparts! Quickly!
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--Formerly: Gort--
Posts: 12954 | Registered: May 2004
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Kelly Alves
Bunny with an axe
# 2522
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Posted
Holy Cow, a feminist call to arms? And nobody nudged me awake?
Yawns and picks up placard.
Yes... I am wise...but it's wisdom from the pain
Yes, I paid the price...
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I cannot expect people to believe “
Jesus loves me, this I know” of they don’t believe “Kelly loves me, this I know.”
Kelly Alves, somewhere around 2003.
Posts: 35076 | From: Pura Californiana | Registered: Mar 2002
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Quizmaster
Quick quipper
# 1435
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by RooK:
Belisarius, you've shown me the error of my ways, bless your heart. I am utterly changed by your heroic efforts. Your kind and forgiving treatment of me should be a lesson for all.
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The more questions I ask the more I ask fewer questions.
OR=========================================
The wise person does not know all the answers, but always asks the right questions.
Posts: 3326 | From: Exeter, Devon | Registered: Oct 2001
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Chorister
Completely Frocked
# 473
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Posted
I will donate half my winnings to RuthW
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Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.
Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001
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dolphy
Lady of Perpetual Responsiblity
# 862
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by RuthW:
You fear our strength... you misogynistic pipsqueaks. You are right to be afraid of us. We wymun are going to take over, and your narrow-minded, rule-bound, hair-splitting days are numbered.
![[Overused]](graemlins/notworthy.gif) Amen Sister!
I donate all my winnings, three cases of the finest wines and chocolate to our Sister RuthW.
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Looking forward to my rock moving closer again.
Posts: 15134 | From: my camper van | Registered: Jul 2001
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Rossweisse
High Church Valkyrie
# 2349
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by RuthW:
They're suddenly short-handed in Purgatory, I offer (out of the goodness of my heart) to help out for a little while, and you seize the opportunity to throw me out of the SoF Idol competition. It figures. I knew this would happen. ...
It seems to me that a slightly different reading of the Fine Print would let you stay on; after all, you were not a host nor an admin when you entered. And they gave you immunity! Does that count for nothing?
I think you've just given us yet another awesome Hellrant here, and that you should get double immunity for same. Marchons!
Rossweisse // sisterhood is powerful!
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I'm not dead yet.
Posts: 15117 | From: Valhalla | Registered: Feb 2002
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Goldfish Stew
Shipmate
# 5512
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Posted
Sorry folks, but the stakes here are just too high.
Although it saddens me that RuthW has to leave, we must remember that this is a serious competition and she now has the ability to edit other competitors posts. In a competition where the whole point is to impress everyone with the quality of your posts doesn't it strike you as a little bit risky to allow someone with such powers to be a competitor.
Not that I distrust you Ruth, but the Lure of Glory™ may prove too much for even the most ethical competitor.
Kiwi
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Posts: 2405 | From: Aotearoa/New Zealand | Registered: Feb 2004
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Robert Armin
All licens'd fool
# 182
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Posted
As Admin Emeritus didn't she always have the power to edit posts? I too want to see Ruth back in the contest (not least because I've got 10-1 on her at Ladbrokes and they are refusing to refund my money!).
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Keeping fit was an obsession with Fr Moity .... He did chin ups in the vestry, calisthenics in the pulpit, and had developed a series of Tai-Chi exercises to correspond with ritual movements of the Mass. The Antipope Robert Rankin
Posts: 8927 | From: In the pack | Registered: May 2001
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Rossweisse
High Church Valkyrie
# 2349
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by kiwigoldfish:
...Although it saddens me that RuthW has to leave, we must remember that this is a serious competition and she now has the ability to edit other competitors posts. In a competition where the whole point is to impress everyone with the quality of your posts doesn't it strike you as a little bit risky to allow someone with such powers to be a competitor. ...
No. I trust Ruth implicitly.
Rossweisse // not being facetious
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I'm not dead yet.
Posts: 15117 | From: Valhalla | Registered: Feb 2002
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Mad Geo
Ship's navel gazer
# 2939
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Posted
For Nomination.....
Sisterhood.
Pah!
Another bunch of whiners in search of a clue. Because, God knows, if they were searching for a cause, they couldn't find it if it was nailed to their cushy well rounded netherparts with a jackhammer.
Let me enlighten you "sisters". The reason women can't get ahead is that they can't stop infighting amongst their catty backstabbing donut-stuffing selves. Small wonder we use you as receptionists.
Glass Ceiling? Hah! Waa Waa Waaaaaaa! Sniffle. You're breaking my heart. The glass ceiling can't be broken because there are 40 women hanging on to the leg of one woman trying to climb the ladder! Your nothing but easy targets for your betters. Your betters, of course, being Men.
You see, having a big swingin' hangy-down-thing really enables one to discern what's important, that being, letting you women think that whining and bellyachin' is going to get you into the corporate office with the golden toilets (the one's we never let you see). We figure (correctly) that as long as you are busy whining, we can actually get the real work down and show the Good Ole Boys that they were right all along, women should be in the bedroom and out of the boardroom.
Now if you find this offensive, we understand how PMS works. It's okay. We'll wait for you to get over it, we always have.
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Diax's Rake - "Never believe a thing simply because you want it to be true"
Posts: 11730 | From: People's Republic of SoCal | Registered: Jun 2002
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Goodric
Shipmate
# 8001
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Posted
Is this really just an act....?
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Happy Christmas Everyone You can find me here
Gone to a better place.
Posts: 7160 | From: You all know anyway | Registered: Jul 2004
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Mad Geo
Ship's navel gazer
# 2939
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Posted
My girlfriend is a Feminist Goddess, ask RuthW.
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Diax's Rake - "Never believe a thing simply because you want it to be true"
Posts: 11730 | From: People's Republic of SoCal | Registered: Jun 2002
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RuthW
liberal "peace first" hankie squeezer
# 13
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Posted
Your girlfriend betrayed us all when she went over to the Dark Side and started dating you.
Posts: 24453 | From: La La Land | Registered: Apr 2001
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Mad Geo
Ship's navel gazer
# 2939
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Posted
Me? Why I'm just a fun lovin' harmless little guy with a great big keyboard.
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Diax's Rake - "Never believe a thing simply because you want it to be true"
Posts: 11730 | From: People's Republic of SoCal | Registered: Jun 2002
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Goodric
Shipmate
# 8001
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Posted
"harmless" - now I know he's lying. That was no parody, Mad Geo that came from the heart.
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Happy Christmas Everyone You can find me here
Gone to a better place.
Posts: 7160 | From: You all know anyway | Registered: Jul 2004
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Mad Geo
Ship's navel gazer
# 2939
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Posted
Don't make me come over there and kiss you.
[ 30. November 2004, 22:30: Message edited by: Mad Geo ]
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Diax's Rake - "Never believe a thing simply because you want it to be true"
Posts: 11730 | From: People's Republic of SoCal | Registered: Jun 2002
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Rossweisse
High Church Valkyrie
# 2349
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Goodric:
Is this really just an act....?
I'm trying to figure out whether the grammar-impaired business is genuine or just part of the act.
Rossweisse // hoping that it's the latter
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I'm not dead yet.
Posts: 15117 | From: Valhalla | Registered: Feb 2002
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