Posted                      

quote:

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Originally posted by Grits:
I'm thinking he'd better be watching out for his hangy-down-thing.

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Posted                      

quote:

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Originally posted by RuthW:
That's the spirit, wimmin! Castrating bitches of the world unite!

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The Senior Child just offered to lend me her grandfather's World War II machete, which she somehow sweet-talked him into giving her.

Oh, she says she'd be happy to help with the operation. Another generation of castrating bitches is born!

Rossweisse // I'm so proud!

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I'm not dead yet.

Posted                       

quote:

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Originally posted by dolphy:
<sings>

Sisters are doing it for themselves


Just wondering if we really need to use these large weapons, perhaps a forklift might be better, after all, we all know how men lie about their size

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Posted                      

quote:

---

Originally posted by dolphy:
Just wondering if we really need to use these large weapons, perhaps tweezers might be better, after all, we all know how men lie about their size

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Posted                       

quote:

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Originally posted by Mad Geo:
I fixed your post.

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This is war! You evil cheat you... how dare you fix my post...

Best watch your little dangly bit from now on!

--------------------
Looking forward to my rock moving closer again.

Posted                      

quote:

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Originally posted by KenWritez:
...This thread is a game and so ought to be in the Circus, not Heaven. Apologies for not catching this earlier.

Off we go....

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But....but....but....

This was started by an ADMIN! Can a host just up and transfer it down to the subbasement, just like that?

(Evidently so, but still:)

Rossweisse // not a regular here

[ 02. December 2004, 00:24: Message edited by: Rossweisse ]

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I'm not dead yet.

Posted                          

quote:

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we hope to have evaluations coming in soon.

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After reading through all the responses to Mad Geo, I read this as "ejaculations"!

(I know, I know... I'm working on my critiques, Bel.)

--------------------
Lord, fill my mouth with worthwhile stuff, and shut it when I've said enough. Amen.

Posted                   

quote:

---

Originally posted by Mad Geo:
Apparently I am not the only one around here with a big swingin' hangy-down-thingy. I could swear I just saw Kenwritez go by with his swingin....

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Posted                      

quote:

---

Originally posted by KenWritez:
This thread is a game and so ought to be in the Circus, not Heaven. Apologies for not catching this earlier.

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quote:

---

Originally posted by Belisarius:
SoF Idol, however, is unfortunately a harsh mistress and must be above suspicion.

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Posted                          

quote:

---

Originally posted by RuthW:

quote:

---

Originally posted by KenWritez:
This thread is a game and so ought to be in the Circus, not Heaven. Apologies for not catching this earlier.

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A game? The oppression of wombyn is a game?!?! Sorry, I'm not playing.

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Posted                      

quote:

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Originally posted by RuthW:
A game? The oppression of wombyn is a game?!?! Sorry, I'm not playing.

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quote:

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...thus completing the classic virgin/whore model held out for wymon to emulate throughout the history of the patriarchal mess that is Western "civilization." ...

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Posted                      

quote:

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Originally posted by Rossweisse:
[Urgent whisper] Ruth! Ruth! It's DICHOTOMY! 'The virgin-whore DICHOTOMY!'[/Urgent whisper]

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Slaps forehead. Can't believe I missed that one. But I got "hegemony" in there.

Posted                      

quote:

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Originally posted by RuthW:
But I got "hegemony" in there.

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And you get points for it!



Rossweisse // brushing up my Wimyn's Vocab

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I'm not dead yet.

Posted                       

quote:

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Originally posted by Vikki Pollard:
Prompted by the thread, ‘Divine right to Shag’

originally posted by Coitus Continuous

quote:

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Who do you think you are, some anally-retentive b*tch with the right to dictate my morals? What is your problem with me?

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I’ve had it with you.

Or rather, I haven’t – and maybe that’s your problem with me? You seem to think that just because you feel free to leap into bed with as many Shipmates as possible, we should all be doing the same. And when a dissenting voice or two is heard, you then feel free to shoot them down in flames. OK. That’s your right. It’s my right to reply. Since you seem to be interested, here (in no particular order) are my comments about your behaviour on these boards.

Contrary to what you seem to believe, I have no objection to your morals. I just don’t particularly want to hear about them over breakfast.

I don’t think ‘in the interests of research’, however funny you find it, is a good enough excuse for your nefarious activity. It would have to be a dull day on the Shipping forecast before your research into ANYthing was more interesting than watching paint dry.

I think waiting 3 years before admitting that you have been to Shipmeets all over the world in order to bed innocent victims was far too long. 6 months would have been kinder all round, especially to those poor women in the foursome. How COULD you put those photos on the Net? How DARE you put a link from All Saints under the title, “Sisterly Love”? Have you any idea what you have done to that community of Benedictine Nuns in Idaho who were trying out Google for the first time?

I think the blurb on the back cover of your book (and I quote), “See how these Christians love one another!” is a gratuitous perversion of Scripture. I also think the photos were disgusting and unedifying, except perhaps the joke one of you standing in front of the alligator pool – I grant you, that was quite amusing.

For me, the last straw was your very detailed account of your last five encounters (at a SHIP WEDDING, for heaven’s sake!) with a poll for people to vote on the best. Tacky? That’s an insult to tack. Self-respect? You obviously don’t know the meaning of the word – but respect for others is an integral part of this community, and IMHO you don’t deserve a place in it any more. You are a self-obsessed, self-important, slimy, skanky, uncaring, probably STD-carrying piece of scum. And so, for that matter, are the 43 people who voted.

BTW I notice YOUR genitals appear to be the only ones not featured in the many photographs in your book. Is it possible they are so small they don’t show up on film?

Anally retentive? MOI? Hah! I’d keep all your back-door exits (and entrances?) well-closed if I were you, or you might just find a computer keyboard jammed up there so far that you’ll need the services of a very understanding proctologist. Quickly. Because my prediction is you’re gonna be walking that plank so fast you may not even get chance to read this. Good riddance.

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quote:

---

Very amusing. Beautiful listing of your ‘problems’ with him, each one racheting the amusement up another level. I wasn’t so sure about your ‘six months’ comment, however. Yet, overall, a sterling piece of work – solid, well-thought-out, amusing, and leaving the reader in no doubt of just how much you both are angry with, and despise this poster.

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quote:

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You know, Vikki girl, I’d have to say you are bucking to be the poster child for the “I’m Not Getting Any, and I’m P*ssed!” campaign. I also think you might need to reexamine your sexual orientation – not that I’d have a problem with that.

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quote:

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Well, you picked an easy target, which is never going to get you any favours. Having said that, however, I was enjoying your post until you resorted to smilies.

A picture might say a thousand words, but you’d have done much better writing them.

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Posted                       

quote:

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Originally posted by Chorister:
Quoted from the thread, 'Quenching the Spirit', by Rev320:

quote:

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Only when we rid the church of traditional church choirs will the Holy Spirit be able to move freely in the land

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I woke up this morning to see a hand of fire, burning the following message into my ceiling:
'Go ye into all the land and use Rev320 as a butt-wipe. The Holy Spirit™ hath spoken. P.S. I love church choirs '

Get thee behind me Satan.

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quote:

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Very droll petal. Short, sweet, and to the point. You clearly didn’t feel the need to hector relentlessly, use long words, or even explode in anger and bile, to get your point across. And yet, you still left me cut to the quick. The ‘cool’ smilie at the end was a lovely touch.

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quote:

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Don’t mess with the Holy Spirit, dawg. Can I get a hallelujah?

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quote:

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I’m pretty sure ‘butt-wipe’ counts as a profanity. And you used a Cool smilie. In Hell. <shakes head> Fail.

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Posted                       

quote:

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Originally posted by kiwigoldfish:
context: in the midst of a hellish debate about conventional medicine and alternative therapies for cancer

quote:

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Originally posted by Whine:
My how things have deteriorated in this discussion. I guess it's only to be expected the way you people have all been brainwashed by the medical profession (you cannot trust doctors, who have all been influenced and bribed by the pharmaceutical companies.) I wholly recommend this website and any of the books sold on that site. They are well researched and insightful reviews of all the medical literature on the subject.

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Petal, you and your fellow proponents of such conspiracy theories are to intelligent debate what Stephen Hawking is to tap-dancing.

Get a grip man. I have seen some of these books and they are clearly aimed at the section of the market whose parents should not have been allowed to breed. I assume by "well researched" you mean "had lots of footnotes."¹ The fact is, most of the journal articles that they cite not only fail to back up the point that your beloved "researchers" are trying to make,² but actually prove the precise opposite.³ But then again, given the intellect of their average disciple they could get away with printing any old rubbish. Wait a minute, they already are.

Your constant churlish attacks on the medical profession prove nothing about the profession, but plenty about your personality. In fact, if you were any more anally retentive you'd have to defecate by caesarean.

Enjoy the weather in Coventry.

Kiwi

ps. Sorry to see that the brain transplant failed.

Footnotes
¹ added to prove to Whine that this must be true.
² ditto
³ so I can only conclude that you see the little footnote number and assume that that makes it absolutely true.

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quote:

---

I remembered the thread you were referencing, and see that you caught the context beautifully. Snappy, with a lovely use of “” to indicate your scorn and derision, and managed an impressively wide range, insulting not just his opinions, intellect and personality, but also his personal tendencies.

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quote:

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Your post was way too scientific for me, dude. And that was a low blow to Stephen Hawking, man. Where’s your humanity?

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quote:

---

You might be surprised to learn I liked it. It was pithy, well-composed, and intelligent. Had you not included the rather pathetic brain transplant remark, I’d have signed you up on the spot.

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Posted                       

quote:

---

Originally posted by Rossweisse:
Calling The Jerk to Hell

I keep trying to ignore you, Jerk, but you just won't be ignored, will you? Like my infant daughter, you keep defecating into the hand that's attempting to clean your foul, noisome, poop-covered bottom -- but unlike said infant, who at least has the potential to grow into a worthwhile human being, you will never be anything but a bad example to the rest of humanity, or what passes for it online.

Which was the post that finally forced me to acknowledge your general and all-encompassing loathesomeness? Was it those ghastly chemotherapy jokes posted on the All Saints cancer thread? Was it the link to an abattoir that you stuck on the "Why I Love Fluffy Bunnies" thread in Heaven? Was it your sniggering sophomoric sexual references ("Just step over them," "Oh, get a room!" and so forth) when two posters -- who happened to be male and female (one of each) -- got into a disagreement over the true nature and relevance of the Real Presence in the "Munching Jesus" thread in Purgatory? Was it your willingness to pile on with vile ad hominem attacks and to flame at random when Hapless Newbie found himself called to Hell?

[Rhetorical Question alert!]

It was all of these, and more. Sarcasm and mean-spiritedness can be amusing....in small doses. But by constantly dumping a Giant Economy-Size Industrial-Strength box of self-aggrandizing sarcasm and low-grade mean-spiritedness on us, you've gone far beyond amusement. The Internet is full of shooting galleries. By turning the Ship into your private target range, you have gone too far.

You are a deservedly friendless lump of greasy excrement, a boil upon the bottom of Humankind, Screwtape's favorite potential nummy, a stinking bottomless ashtray whose very presence sets off smoke alarms, and a complete and total waste of DNA.

And I have No Opinion of you.

---

quote:

---

I was a little unsure as you began; this competition already has a strong emphasis on poo, and defecation, and I felt we needed less, not more. However, you were clearly using it as a simile, and only touched briefly on it, before moving off into more impressive invective. And how impressive it was. I loved the use of rhetorical questions to list what the numpty had done, thereby setting the scene for the those of us not in your head. And your last paragraph, containing five wonderfully thought-and-drawn-out insults finished the job beautifully.

---

quote:

---

I like it, I like it, I like it. That was bad, dawg. You rock.

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quote:

---

A Call to Hell is not a ‘cutting put-down’. Can no-one read instructions? Oh, and did you really use the word ‘poop’? Good God, woman.

To add insult to injury, you call your opponent a ‘friendless lump of greasy excrement, a boil upon the bottom of Humankind, Screwtape's favorite potential nummy, a stinking bottomless ashtray whose very presence sets off smoke alarms, and a complete and total waste of DNA.’, and then go on to say you have ‘no opinion of him’? What are these if not opinions? I can only hope you were being ‘humourous’.

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Posted                       

quote:

---

Originally posted by Left at the Altar:
Normally I ignore you, Jerk. I figure that anyone who posts the drivel that you post is having us all on.

But you are not, are you? You are actually a really sad little twerp who believes what he writes is (a) true, (b) worthy and (c)witty.

In fact, what you write is (a)rubbish, (b) worthless rubbish and (c) turgid, dull rubbish. To the extent that it makes anyone laugh, rest assured that they laugh at you, not with you.

Tommorrow I will go back to ignoring you, but for now, take comfort in the fact that your post has raised my ire. I'm angry because what you write is not on paper and (sadly) I find that cannot wipe my backside with my computer screen.

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quote:

---

It was a touch, unfocused, wasn’t it, poppet? I didn’t really feel a sense of anger, or even annoyance, coming from you over this. You seemed to be going through the motions a little. However, the repetition for emphasis of rubbish, and the ‘computer screen’ comment at the end redeemed it well enough.

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quote:

---

Sssssmmmokin’! You are one hot mama. Don’t be cruel, baby.

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quote:

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What can I say? It was (a) dull, (b) really dull and (c) really, really dull.

On the plus side, it was mercifully short.

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Posted                      

quote:

---

STOO:
... Oh, and did you really use the word ‘poop’?

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quote:

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To add insult to injury...then go on to say you have ‘no opinion of him’? What are these if not opinions? I can only hope you were being ‘humourous’.

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Posted                      

quote:

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Originally posted by Mad Geo:
YOU'RE complaining? At least you GOT your review.

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Posted                       

quote:

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Originally posted by dolphy:
OP from dolphy descends into hell

I can not believe you have forced me to do this, you low life, you butt boil, you pimple on the face of society. You reckon that you stand a chance? - think again you evil scheming sockmuppet. I am calling you here to be flame grilled, roasted and pulled to pieces, chewed up by the animals and then spat out again. You and your pathetic postings, you have not got a clue have you? You come in here, paint a great big target on your fat arse and then run away wimpering when you are shot. Scared now are you?, well you better be...be afraid, be very afraid. If I were you, I would run back home to Mummy, failing that, go play a game in the Circus, go post on the random thread if your intellect is up to it. Better start saying your prayers kid, you're gonna need them. If you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen coz it sure looks like dolphin is on the menu tonight.

(Yes, I have sent myself a pm).

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quote:

---

A good, solid, put-down. Great generation of alternatives to ‘roast’, using several synonyms to emphasize your point. I was wavering over giving this a 2 or a 3, due to some issues over whether calling yourself to Hell is ever going to work. However, it does work on some occasions, and also, you were allowed to call any poster in this round, therefore I gave you a well-deserved 3. I’d suggest sorting out your grammar, punctuation, and paragraphing ready for the next round though, honey.

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quote:

---

I give you props for the way you stepped out of yourself for this post, girlfriend. You almost made me believe that you could put down your own self. I would have scored you higher, though, if you had refused to be nice and PM yourself.

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quote:

---

Have you heard of paragraphs? Your post was sadly lacking. Them, and content.

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Posted                       

quote:

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Originally posted by Quizmaster:
ALL SAINTS

"The Bad Ideas Meet"

All those who want to meet up, have a few beers and discuss how many more bad ideas Belisarius can come up with should gather on Saturday at the pub in London.

Please bring all your bad ideas with you!

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quote:

---

You don’t really understand the competition, do you pet? I can’t see any evidence of a put-down in your post, so I’m afraid that I have to give you a lower mark to reflect this. If you survive until the next round, I heartily recommend pulling out.

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quote:

---

That was a big snore, dude.

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quote:

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Good Lord… Another fool who can’t read. A big fat fail, I’m afraid.

Actually, I’m not afraid. It deserved nothing better.

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Posted                       

quote:

---

Originally posted by duchess:

quote:

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Originally posted by babybear:
I suggest "sucky machine" or "This robot sucks (TRS)".

Gort, you are starting to sound like the love-bot of Marvin the Paranoid Anderoid and Kryton from Red Dwarf... You are going to end up in therapy.

---

Calling babybear to Hell

You wanton stumpet when it comes to posting! How dare you flaunt yourself all over the place, like you are so cute and cuddly, when deep down, we all know you want to let loose and stab somebody with those knitting needles and shears!

Acting like you are so kind...you are evil to the core in your coal black Welsh heart, thinking you are hot *BLEEP* on a silver platter when you are really cold *BLEEP* on a paper-plate!

Telling the Gort-one that he needs therapy...all he needs is a vacation from your helpful lectures of Jung. And no, I am not over-reacting, not a bit. I am dead serious. For reals.

Hmph! Momma wasn't born yesterday ...I know you hate me with a brutal apathetic fashion just because I am not Welsh* and further more, because I am a Calivinist. Well let me tell you, there are no thin places left for you! No thin places! God took them away...away from YOU!

So go and knit me a bear, see if I care.

Word to the mother.


*except for 1/16th but that doesn't count because it ain't good enough for the likes of you.

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quote:

---

You seem to have gotten a touch of RuthW’s disease, pet, what with all the anger. You sure are angry with babybear. Reading your entry through, each sentence makes sense, yet I am unsure of a coherent whole, beyond that you are angry with babybear over some comment she made to Gort. A little more detail on how you are angry with her, or a few more colourful insults, would have worked a treat in this. A good work-up though, and I was particularly impressed with your gratuitously working-in of references to other threads.

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quote:

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That was scary, child! You made me afraid, that’s for reals. And I could actually understand every word of your post, which made it even scarier.

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quote:

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Another Calling to Hell?

It was unstructured, uncontrolled and unbelievably dire. Oh – and the ‘Bleeps’ really are pathetic.

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