Source: (consider it)
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Thread: The Shiny New Limericks Thread
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Kwesi
Shipmate
# 10274
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Posted
All gasping for air
Posts: 1641 | From: South Ofankor | Registered: Sep 2005
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Welease Woderwick
 Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424
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Posted
Whilst in Manc I went to the Lowry A tourist from Alpha Centauri With 8 kids and au pair All gasping for air
So I sent them all off to Blairgowrie!
* * * *
On vacation amongst the high peaks
-------------------- I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way. Fancy a break in South India? Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?
Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005
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Wet Kipper
Circus Runaway
# 1654
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Posted
I heard a small chorus of squeaks
-------------------- - insert randomly chosen, potentially Deep and Meaningful™ song lyrics here -
Posts: 9841 | From: further up the Hill | Registered: Nov 2001
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Raptor Eye
Shipmate
# 16649
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Posted
The pied piper was near
-------------------- Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10
Posts: 4359 | From: The United Kingdom | Registered: Sep 2011
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Meike
Shipmate
# 3006
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Posted
Near enough to overhear
-------------------- “A god who let us prove his existence would be an idol” ― Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Posts: 250 | From: I like this place | Registered: Jul 2002
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Kwesi
Shipmate
# 10274
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Posted
The drip, drip of new WikiLeaks.
There once was a bishop called Spong
Posts: 1641 | From: South Ofankor | Registered: Sep 2005
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Pewter
Apprentice
# 16308
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Posted
Who lectured a gathering throng
Posts: 43 | Registered: Mar 2011
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Welease Woderwick
 Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424
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Posted
on expanding their thoughts
-------------------- I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way. Fancy a break in South India? Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?
Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005
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Meike
Shipmate
# 3006
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Posted
And standing by the lake he saw two yachts
-------------------- “A god who let us prove his existence would be an idol” ― Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Posts: 250 | From: I like this place | Registered: Jul 2002
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Raptor Eye
Shipmate
# 16649
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Posted
And knew he'd gone on for too long.
A man wearing a very tall hat
-------------------- Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10
Posts: 4359 | From: The United Kingdom | Registered: Sep 2011
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Welease Woderwick
 Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424
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Posted
reading Dr Seuss
-------------------- I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way. Fancy a break in South India? Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?
Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005
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Meike
Shipmate
# 3006
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Posted
Dreaming of Seuss juice
-------------------- “A god who let us prove his existence would be an idol” ― Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Posts: 250 | From: I like this place | Registered: Jul 2002
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Welease Woderwick
 Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424
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Posted
and hitting mosquitoes KERSPLAT!
* * * *
When walking one day to my club
-------------------- I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way. Fancy a break in South India? Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?
Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005
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Golden Key
Shipmate
# 1468
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Posted
I suddenly began to blub
-------------------- Blessed Gator, pray for us! --"Oh bat bladders, do you have to bring common sense into this?" (Dragon, "Jane & the Dragon") --"Oh, Peace Train, save this country!" (Yusuf/Cat Stevens, "Peace Train")
Posts: 18601 | From: Chilling out in an undisclosed, sincere pumpkin patch. | Registered: Oct 2001
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Welease Woderwick
 Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424
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Posted
as I thought of the days
-------------------- I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way. Fancy a break in South India? Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?
Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005
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Sipech
Shipmate
# 16870
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Posted
Before they got taken over by dub.
There once was a fraudster called Dave
-------------------- I try to be self-deprecating; I'm just not very good at it. Twitter: http://twitter.com/TheAlethiophile
Posts: 3791 | From: On the corporate ladder | Registered: Jan 2012
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Meike
Shipmate
# 3006
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Posted
One morning he had a brainwave
-------------------- “A god who let us prove his existence would be an idol” ― Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Posts: 250 | From: I like this place | Registered: Jul 2002
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Kwesi
Shipmate
# 10274
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Posted
"A P.M. I'll be"
Posts: 1641 | From: South Ofankor | Registered: Sep 2005
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Welease Woderwick
 Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424
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Posted
he said with some glee
-------------------- I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way. Fancy a break in South India? Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?
Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005
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jacobsen
 seeker
# 14998
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Posted
But don't think the country I'll save!"
Great Britain's finances are pants
-------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty.
Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009
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Golden Key
Shipmate
# 1468
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Posted
Don't worry--just get up and dance!
-------------------- Blessed Gator, pray for us! --"Oh bat bladders, do you have to bring common sense into this?" (Dragon, "Jane & the Dragon") --"Oh, Peace Train, save this country!" (Yusuf/Cat Stevens, "Peace Train")
Posts: 18601 | From: Chilling out in an undisclosed, sincere pumpkin patch. | Registered: Oct 2001
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Kwesi
Shipmate
# 10274
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Posted
The Keynesian Gavotte
Posts: 1641 | From: South Ofankor | Registered: Sep 2005
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Raptor Eye
Shipmate
# 16649
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Posted
And the Chancellor Foxtrot
-------------------- Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10
Posts: 4359 | From: The United Kingdom | Registered: Sep 2011
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jacobsen
 seeker
# 14998
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Posted
And ignore Mr.Cameron's rants!
Now, whether your party is Green [ 30. April 2015, 15:15: Message edited by: jacobsen ]
-------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty.
Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009
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Meike
Shipmate
# 3006
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Posted
Or if you support Mr Bean
-------------------- “A god who let us prove his existence would be an idol” ― Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Posts: 250 | From: I like this place | Registered: Jul 2002
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
 Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
Her Majesty reckons
-------------------- "I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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jacobsen
 seeker
# 14998
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Posted
That Green is already has-been.
Oh joy!It's a three day weekend
-------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty.
Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009
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Meike
Shipmate
# 3006
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Posted
Free at last! Free at last, my friend!
-------------------- “A god who let us prove his existence would be an idol” ― Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Posts: 250 | From: I like this place | Registered: Jul 2002
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jrw
Shipmate
# 18045
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Posted
"Not so fast", said the boss
Posts: 522 | Registered: Mar 2014
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jacobsen
 seeker
# 14998
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Posted
I'm off for a ***** weekend.
You talk too much - kindly shut up.
-------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty.
Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009
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pimple
 Ship's Irruption
# 10635
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Posted
said the quacker we all know as FUP
-------------------- In other words, just because I made it all up, doesn't mean it isn't true (Reginald Hill)
Posts: 8018 | From: Wonderland | Registered: Nov 2005
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jacobsen
 seeker
# 14998
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Posted
When I hear your voice
-------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty.
Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009
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Meike
Shipmate
# 3006
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Posted
Gentle and sweet as construction noise
-------------------- “A god who let us prove his existence would be an idol” ― Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Posts: 250 | From: I like this place | Registered: Jul 2002
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Pewter
Apprentice
# 16308
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Posted
The bile runneth over my cup
My tip for predicting the weather
Posts: 43 | Registered: Mar 2011
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Meike
Shipmate
# 3006
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Posted
Are the Sibylline Oracles bound in leather
-------------------- “A god who let us prove his existence would be an idol” ― Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Posts: 250 | From: I like this place | Registered: Jul 2002
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Kwesi
Shipmate
# 10274
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Posted
But my gouty big toe
Posts: 1641 | From: South Ofankor | Registered: Sep 2005
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Raptor Eye
Shipmate
# 16649
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Posted
Is telling me there'll be snow
-------------------- Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10
Posts: 4359 | From: The United Kingdom | Registered: Sep 2011
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
 Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
But inaccurate when tickled by a feather.
(The scansion is already shot to hell, so why the devil not?)
A siren who sang in the choir
-------------------- "I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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Meike
Shipmate
# 3006
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Posted
Had a sneeze attack during Händel's Messiah
-------------------- “A god who let us prove his existence would be an idol” ― Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Posts: 250 | From: I like this place | Registered: Jul 2002
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Kwesi
Shipmate
# 10274
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Posted
It was quite an anointing
Posts: 1641 | From: South Ofankor | Registered: Sep 2005
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kingsfold
 Shipmate
# 1726
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Posted
But most disappointing
Posts: 4473 | From: land of the wee midgie | Registered: Nov 2001
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
 Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
To the one who dry-cleaned her attire.
In Rome, I behaved like the Romans.
-------------------- "I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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Meike
Shipmate
# 3006
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Posted
Ate gelato all day, perché no, gents?
-------------------- “A god who let us prove his existence would be an idol” ― Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Posts: 250 | From: I like this place | Registered: Jul 2002
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The5thMary
Shipmate
# 12953
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Posted
I tried to conquer the region,
-------------------- God gave me my face but She let me pick my nose.
Posts: 3451 | From: Tacoma, WA USA | Registered: Aug 2007
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Golden Key
Shipmate
# 1468
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Posted
Where, like Paul, we all sat and made tents!
A giraffe wand'ring through old Cairo
-------------------- Blessed Gator, pray for us! --"Oh bat bladders, do you have to bring common sense into this?" (Dragon, "Jane & the Dragon") --"Oh, Peace Train, save this country!" (Yusuf/Cat Stevens, "Peace Train")
Posts: 18601 | From: Chilling out in an undisclosed, sincere pumpkin patch. | Registered: Oct 2001
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