|
Source: (consider it)
|
Thread: AS: Fertility Problems II
|
Jengie jon
Semper Reformanda
# 273
|
Posted
Chukovsky
If you need longer I would take it. Get a GP to sign you off if neccessary. You need time both for grief and for recovery. Going back too early only tends to prolong the processes.
Jengie
--------------------
"To violate a persons ability to distinguish fact from fantasy is the epistemological equivalent of rape." Noretta Koertge
Back to my blog
Posts: 20894 | From: city of steel, butterflies and rainbows | Registered: May 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
Caz...
Shipmate
# 3026
|
Posted
So deeply sad and sorry to hear your news, Chukovsky. I would second Jengie - take as long as you need and not a moment less. You are more important than any job, any to do list. Seriously.
Praying that God would be near you.
--------------------
"What have you been reading? The Gospel according to St. Bastard?" - Eddie Izzard
Posts: 1888 | From: here to there | Registered: Jul 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Jane R
Shipmate
# 331
|
Posted
![[Votive]](graemlins/votive.gif) for Suze and Chukovsky.
Jane R
Posts: 3958 | From: Jorvik | Registered: May 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
chukovsky
Ship's toddler
# 116
|
Posted
Saw the GP, who was actually helpful for a change - I'm to ring on Monday if I don't feel up to work and he'll sort me out a sick note without needing to make another appointment. I still need to have a scan to make sure it was "complete", and get a tertiary referral from the consultant.
--------------------
This space left intentionally blank. Do not write on both sides of the paper at once.
Posts: 6842 | From: somewhere else | Registered: May 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
|
|
Dee.
Ship's Theological Acrobat
# 5681
|
Posted
--------------------
Jesus - nice bloke, bit religious
Posts: 2679 | From: Under Downunder | Registered: Mar 2004
| IP: Logged
|
|
Bronwyn
Shipmate
# 52
|
Posted
No words can express the feelings of greif I have. ![[Waterworks]](graemlins/bawling.gif) Hugs.
Why God Why???????
--------------------
Fragile X syndrome is part of our lives. Someone I love makes me proud who has this syndrome. I love you Miriam.
Posts: 1221 | From: Melbourne (Australia) | Registered: May 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
Suze
Ship's Barmaid
# 5639
|
Posted
Have been away so I've only just caught up. So sorry chukovsky, my prayers are with you just now.
--------------------
' You stay here and I'll go look for God, that won't be hard cos I know where he's not, and I will bring him back with me , then he'll listen , then he'll see' Richard Shindell
Posts: 2603 | From: where the angels sleep | Registered: Mar 2004
| IP: Logged
|
|
duchess
Ship's Blue Blooded Lady
# 2764
|
Posted
chukovsky ![[Frown]](frown.gif)
--------------------
♬♭ We're setting sail to the place on the map from which nobody has ever returned ♫♪♮
Ship of Fools-World Party
Posts: 11197 | From: Do you know the way? | Registered: May 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Jane R
Shipmate
# 331
|
Posted
Sorry to resurrect this thread again, but still thinking about what Suze said...
I couldn't understand, when my sister was trying for her second child (she had secondary infertility; at one point a doctor told her there was no point in carrying on trying because she was going through the menopause*) why she was so worked up about it when she already had one child. I do now. Reminding myself that I already have The Most Beautiful And Perfect Toddler In the World (tm) doesn't help much; it just adds an extra layer of guilt, as I remember all the other people on this thread who don't have any children at all.
Someone else at church has just had her third baby, which reminded me that if Second Sprog had survived I'd have been giving birth myself about now.
Another for Chukovsky, and all those who are still trying.
And a for those who are trying to reconcile themselves to childlessness.
Jane R
* I thought she should go back with all three children and blow a raspberry at him, but she didn't think it was worth the effort.
Posts: 3958 | From: Jorvik | Registered: May 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
chukovsky
Ship's toddler
# 116
|
Posted
Jane, due dates are always incredibly hard - we'll be thinking of you. When no.1 would have been due, we went off on holiday to sunny climes in an effort to avoid sitting around thinking about it.
--------------------
This space left intentionally blank. Do not write on both sides of the paper at once.
Posts: 6842 | From: somewhere else | Registered: May 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
Jane R
Shipmate
# 331
|
Posted
Thanks, Chukovsky. I've been thinking of you too.
We are going on holiday at the end of the week, as it happens; we are having a holiday on the beach. In Scotland. Some may think us mad... but we have plenty of waterproofs, and if we wait until July/August it will be infested with midges. There are plenty of rock pools for the small girl to investigate, so she will have fun whatever the weather.
Jane R
Posts: 3958 | From: Jorvik | Registered: May 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
Bronwyn
Shipmate
# 52
|
Posted
Jane, I remember when I was pregnant the first time I had a friend who was also pregnant. When I lost the baby which she knew about it was very hard. Actually I stopped contacting her for about 18 months as it was too hard. Kept in contact via a mutual friend.
Take it easy and enjoy your holiday.
Chukovsky you are in my thoughts and prayers at this time. OXOXOXOX
--------------------
Fragile X syndrome is part of our lives. Someone I love makes me proud who has this syndrome. I love you Miriam.
Posts: 1221 | From: Melbourne (Australia) | Registered: May 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
Francesca Shelbellini
Shipmate
# 53
|
Posted
Well, I think I need to bring this thread back to life...
I've been reading it steadily (lurking) and now it is time to post (given that I've just consigned a bunch of people to hell about it)!
My story:
Married to my best pal in April 2005. Started trying to reproduce immediately as I'm 35 and R is 37. Got pregnant quickly (in June): felt guilty. Had a miscarriage at 11 weeks (although the embryo had died around 6 weeks, it took my body an amazingly long time to figure it out). Very hard to cope with, as we were nearing the second trimester "tell everybody" mark.
But okay. Doctors say it happens very often. Not my fault. Nothing I could have done. Try to believe that.
Once ready, get pregnant again very quickly (end of December). Again feel guilty. Have miscarriage at 8 weeks.
I take antidepressants for clinical depression anyway, so second loss sends me for a loop. Off work for two weeks, work half time for next six weeks because I just can't cope.
Have wonderful invasive, painful and humiliating tests. Doctor surmises it is luteal phase deficiency. Take hormones after ovulating until menstruating or if pregnant, keep taking until 10 to 12 weeks.
Doc says, off you go, try again.
Yes. I should be happy. It is the best case scenario, something wrong that is relatively easily remedied. I want to have a baby more than anything in the world.
So why am I tearful and terrified? What if it isn't this? Oh God, I don't know if I can cope with another loss. I am a church minister and for the second loss, I felt I had to tell my people as I was talking so much time off, and I didn't want to be off with some "mystery illness" that would get them all anxious and paranoid. But it was so public, and about such a private thing. And it was hard to hear so many well-meaning but useless (at best) and hurtful (at worst) comments from my congregants.
My partner R doesn't really understand, but he at least knows that he doesn't really understand. He can somenow not invest in the pregnancy until he can see a scan. I just can't do that. If it's in me, I love it, I want it, I pray for it.
I know I just have to get over it and try again. Time is passing and the old eggs are just getting older every day... I'm just so afraid. And then I feel so guilty because we don't have a problem conceiving, and so many people do...
Anyway, I just needed to share finally.
Prayers for me and R please as we work through this together.
Posts: 109 | From: vancouver, bc, canada | Registered: May 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
Dee.
Ship's Theological Acrobat
# 5681
|
Posted
For Michelle and R. I cant imagine how difficult this must be.
--------------------
Jesus - nice bloke, bit religious
Posts: 2679 | From: Under Downunder | Registered: Mar 2004
| IP: Logged
|
|
babybear
Bear faced and cheeky with it
# 34
|
Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Michelle:
So why am I tearful and terrified?
Might it have something to do with the fact that you have had two miscarriages in the past year? A miscarriage can knock the stuffing out of people. There is the hormonal toll as well as the emotion one too.
A miscarriage is a strange thing, you are left grieving for a person you have never known. I found that I was grieving for all of the things that might have been, the hope and the dreams.
When I became pregnant again I found it terrifying, the same thing could happen again. It wasn't until I was well passed the stage at which the miscarriage had happened could I allow myself to feel a bit more secure. Then at various times I felt guilty and terrified that something different would go wrong.
At times it seems that guilt is an inevitable side effect of trying to have a baby. I have no idea how to get rid of this guilt though.
quote:
My partner R doesn't really understand, but he at least knows that he doesn't really understand. He can somehow not invest in the pregnancy until he can see a scan. I just can't do that. If it's in me, I love it, I want it, I pray for it.
This I can understand so well. I could feel the difference in my body after just a few days. I knew that I was pregnant and had this mysterious, marvelous baby-creature growing inside me. For Gremlin, he really only had my word for it, and then later the evidence of a couple of chemicals. The pregnancies became real for him when he saw his baby on screen and when he felt his baby moving around and kicking me. This male/female divide seems to be almost universal.
Please know that you are in our prayers. And also even when this thread disappears from view, that we are still praying for you.
Posts: 13287 | From: Cottage of the 3 Bears (and The Gremlin) | Registered: May 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
neandergirl
Opposing the thumb
# 8916
|
Posted
--------------------
Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you. Hebrews 13:5 NIV
We come from love, we return to love, and all around is love.
Lord, ease our burdens, give us peace and enable us to do your work. Tree Bee
Posts: 2579 | From: 21218 | Registered: Dec 2004
| IP: Logged
|
|
Soror Magna
Shipmate
# 9881
|
Posted
(((michelle)))
OliviaG
--------------------
"You come with me to room 1013 over at the hospital, I'll show you America. Terminal, crazy and mean." -- Tony Kushner, "Angels in America"
Posts: 5430 | From: Caprica City | Registered: Jul 2005
| IP: Logged
|
|
Francesca Shelbellini
Shipmate
# 53
|
Posted
quote:
Originally posted by babybear:
quote:
Originally posted by Michelle:
So why am I tearful and terrified?
Might it have something to do with the fact that you have had two miscarriages in the past year? A miscarriage can knock the stuffing out of people. There is the hormonal toll as well as the emotion one too.
Yes, I keep having to remind myself that it's been quite a year. We also bought a house and moved during that year so all in all, a lot of change, loss and transition. I somehow feel like I should just be able to get it together, even though I wouldn't think that if it were someone else!
I am finally giving serious thought to having a small memorial service for the two losses. Just our family and close friends in our garden. The hardest thing is not having something substantial that shows that it is real. My doctor suggested getting the two ultrasound scans which I will follow up with. I am also going to order two garden stones with the dates of each pregnancy on it. To put with two mini rose bushes.
As soon as I started planning the memorial service I started to feel better. I think I really need to have that before we try again.
quote:
This I can understand so well. I could feel the difference in my body after just a few days. I knew that I was pregnant and had this mysterious, marvelous baby-creature growing inside me. For Gremlin, he really only had my word for it, and then later the evidence of a couple of chemicals. The pregnancies became real for him when he saw his baby on screen and when he felt his baby moving around and kicking me. This male/female divide seems to be almost universal.
Yes indeed. The best description I read of it was that when you are pregnant, you feel like this mysterious, magical being. Then when you miscarry, it's just gone. And it's worse than if you'd never been pregnant at all, because now you know what it feels like.
quote:
Please know that you are in our prayers. And also even when this thread disappears from view, that we are still praying for you.
Thank you... mostly I ask for courage, the peace of the Lord, and of course, a baby... ![[Tear]](graemlins/tear.gif)
Many thanks to all who have posted and PM'ed me with their prayers. It means more than I can say.
Posts: 109 | From: vancouver, bc, canada | Registered: May 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
|
|
Tree Bee
Ship's tiller girl
# 4033
|
Posted
Michelle, R, and your babies.
--------------------
"Any fool can make something complicated. It takes a genius to make it simple."
— Woody Guthrie
http://saysaysay54.wordpress.com
Posts: 5257 | From: me to you. | Registered: Feb 2003
| IP: Logged
|
|
Bronwyn
Shipmate
# 52
|
Posted
Having had a couple of miscarrages myself I am so sorry. I found it very special to have a service to farewell our babies which I found on the net. Sorry I could not hold you, tiny one.
The hormones they give you for the lutunal phase make you tired and tearful if you are like me. Although some say you are not a slave to your hormomes the hormones given are huge doses and have made me suicidal in the past.
My thoughts and prayers are with you Michelle. OXOXOXOX
--------------------
Fragile X syndrome is part of our lives. Someone I love makes me proud who has this syndrome. I love you Miriam.
Posts: 1221 | From: Melbourne (Australia) | Registered: May 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
chukovsky
Ship's toddler
# 116
|
Posted
Thinking of you, Michelle.
We have an appointment on August 17th at the recurrent miscarriage clinic.
--------------------
This space left intentionally blank. Do not write on both sides of the paper at once.
Posts: 6842 | From: somewhere else | Registered: May 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
Cedd
Shipmate
# 8436
|
Posted
When my wife and I started trying for children we assumed (very naively) that as Christians that if we prayed about everything then we (and the baby) would be OK. We conceived quickly enough but, despite lots of prayer, the first pregnancy ended in miscarriage at 11 weeks. I think this damaged us both quite a lot and certainly altered our understanding of God and prayer.
The second pregnancy went well (with a few dodgy moments it has to be said) and we now (thank God) have a beautiful three year old.
We tried again and, unfortunately, had another miscarriage - this one much worse (physically) than the first.
We tried again and this one has held on - due in 9 weeks time.
Back in April we went on holiday to Riga, we visited an Orthodox church and I bought 4 candles. My wife asked who they were for and I said "For our four children". We both cried a lot but it was our own memorial for those we had lost and those that we still have.
My prayers for God's blessing on everyone out there.
--------------------
Cedd
Churchmanship: This week I am mostly an evangelical, catholic, orthodox with both liberal and illiberal tendancies. Terms and conditions apply.
Posts: 377 | From: England | Registered: Sep 2004
| IP: Logged
|
|
chukovsky
Ship's toddler
# 116
|
Posted
I just came across this- advice for people who have friends or relatives who have fertility problems.
--------------------
This space left intentionally blank. Do not write on both sides of the paper at once.
Posts: 6842 | From: somewhere else | Registered: May 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
|
|
chukovsky
Ship's toddler
# 116
|
Posted
Fairly helpful meeting with recurrent pregnancy loss nurse on Thursday. I have even less blood in my arm now - I expect it to drop off any time now. We'll hear the results in a month - if any of the tests are positive they will advise on further treatment (she's already suggested I go on the higher dose of folic acid if I get pregnant again), and if they aren't, we'll be given the opportunity to participate in a research trial (since we will then officially have the diagnosis of Idiopathic Recurrent Miscarriage. Lovely).
--------------------
This space left intentionally blank. Do not write on both sides of the paper at once.
Posts: 6842 | From: somewhere else | Registered: May 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
|
|
Gill H
Shipmate
# 68
|
Posted
Feeling really broody today.
My friend and her 'nearly 7' daughter spent Monday with us, and I'm staying with them this weekend. The daughter is absolutely delightful (and incredibly well behaved!)
We're also celebrating the 1st birthday of our goddaughter today with her family, and on Sunday we saw her beginning to walk.
All lovely moments, but with a bittersweet edge. Particularly as the news this morning is full of 'if you're overweight, 40 and broke, forget IVF'.
--------------------
*sigh* We can’t all be Alan Cresswell.
- Lyda Rose
Posts: 9313 | From: London | Registered: May 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
Bronwyn
Shipmate
# 52
|
Posted
Gill, Nothing I could write will take away the feelings you have,if you want to chat let me know. Thoughts and prayers and virtual hugsOXOXOXOXOX
--------------------
Fragile X syndrome is part of our lives. Someone I love makes me proud who has this syndrome. I love you Miriam.
Posts: 1221 | From: Melbourne (Australia) | Registered: May 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
Vikki Pollard
Shipmate
# 5548
|
Posted
--------------------
"I don't get all this fuss about global warming, Miss. Why doesn't the Government just knock down all the f**king greenhouses?" (One of my slightly less bright 15 year old pupils)
Posts: 5695 | From: The Far Side | Registered: Feb 2004
| IP: Logged
|
|
chukovsky
Ship's toddler
# 116
|
Posted
We got the results of the recurrent miscarriage tests back a couple of weeks ago - there is nothing they can put their fingers on so officially I have Idiopathic Recurrent Miscarriage i.e. unexplained. Frustrating but I suppose it's good not to have e.g. thyroid problems. Not much more to be done though I have a couple of questions and we have been asked to participate in a clinical trial, which will involve another test in a month or so.
--------------------
This space left intentionally blank. Do not write on both sides of the paper at once.
Posts: 6842 | From: somewhere else | Registered: May 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
Bronwyn
Shipmate
# 52
|
Posted
quote:
Originally posted by chukovsky:
We got the results of the recurrent miscarriage tests back a couple of weeks ago - there is nothing they can put their fingers on so officially I have Idiopathic Recurrent Miscarriage i.e. unexplained. Frustrating but I suppose it's good not to have e.g. thyroid problems. Not much more to be done though I have a couple of questions and we have been asked to participate in a clinical trial, which will involve another test in a month or so.
chukovsky it is so hard to not have a reason. I really would try the clinical trial, although stressful it may succeed, I mean it is a chance. Although different Miriam was born after a trial of a new drug...although the situation is different and I remember people saying things like that when I was trying and it didn't always help, so ignore it if it doesn't. Will pray.
--------------------
Fragile X syndrome is part of our lives. Someone I love makes me proud who has this syndrome. I love you Miriam.
Posts: 1221 | From: Melbourne (Australia) | Registered: May 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
Matrix
Shipmate
# 3452
|
Posted
Been a while since any movement on this thread. I'll kick things off again with a prayer request then. MiniMatrix is now 2 (amazing how time shoots by) and is healthy and well and completely through all the prematurity issues.
We've been thinking for a while about having another go. We tried one cycle in Autumn that didn't work, prior to our move to london. We had lined up an appt at the clinic at the centre of the Panorama row recently, and have since cancelled that. So we feel a bit at square one, with a bioclocks ticking and a keenness to do what's right, please pray, and let us know (feel free to pm) of experiences of london clinics.
Grace and Peace
M
--------------------
Maybe that's all a family really is; a group of people who miss the same imaginary place. - Garden State
Posts: 3847 | From: The courts of the King | Registered: Oct 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
kentishmaid
Shipmate
# 4767
|
Posted
I probably don't really belong in this thread, but we've been trying for nearly 10 months now and we're not getting anywhere fast. Prior to that we'd been on a break because two months of trying had produced very late periods and no positive test (the last time was 26 days late).
I've come to the conclusion that it's probably stress on my part because most areas of my life are stressful currently (job, state of the flat, finances etc) and so I'm trying to relax, but it's proving quite hard.
It's weird, but despite the fact that I've not been the sort of evangelical I was as a teenager for years now, I still find myself slipping into those bad thought habits in relation to this. For example, feeling that it's arrogant of me to assume that we could ever have children, that it's all my fault because we had sex before marriage etc etc. I know all of this is utterly daft, but it doesn't prevent those thoughts going through my head.
I'm hoping that there's a reason for it all, but it doesn't feel much like it at the moment. The only consolation is that if it does end up taking 11 months, the baby would be due at Christmas which would allow me to have him/her in Leeds where my family and friends are, and where I would eventually like to move.
--------------------
"Who'll be the lady, who'll be the lord, when we are ruled by the love of one another?"
Posts: 2063 | From: Huddersfield | Registered: Jul 2003
| IP: Logged
|
|
Jane R
Shipmate
# 331
|
Posted
for Kentishmaid, Chukovsky, and anyone else out there trying for a baby.
Kentishmaid, if you still aren't pregnant this time next year it's probably worth talking to your doctor. We should have done it after the first two years, but kept putting it off... with the result that by the time we'd worked through all the options short of IVF I was 38. Wasted two years thinking 'of course it does take some couples longer'.
Jane R
and another for two good friends who have also been trying for a year.
Posts: 3958 | From: Jorvik | Registered: May 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
chukovsky
Ship's toddler
# 116
|
Posted
Kentishmaid, if you are over 35 you should be going to the doctor's after 6 months - even if they tell you to go away again you should persist as the investigations take AGES. If you are under 35 then they say a year.
If you haven't done it yet, then invest in (a few boxes of, if your cycles are long and/or irregular) ovulation prediction kits - it will help your case if you can say "and I know what's happening in my cycle" or possibly "and I know nothing's happening in my cycle", if you are unlucky. These are expensive in Boots etc. but not too bad online if you buy the generic kind. Don't bother with fertility meters but if you are feeling keen (and have regular sleeping times) you could try BBT (basal body temperature) charting which will also give you some information.
To avoid hijacking this with lots of TMI, feel free to email me or PM if you need any more info...
--------------------
This space left intentionally blank. Do not write on both sides of the paper at once.
Posts: 6842 | From: somewhere else | Registered: May 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
kentishmaid
Shipmate
# 4767
|
Posted
Cheers all! Luckily I'm 28, so I have got some time on my side (although I'm the sort of greedy guts who wants more than one kid, which doesn't help!).
BBTs aren't very practical as we have two cats who disturb us very vociferously in the morning, so I wouldn't be in sufficiently restful a state to get an accurate reading, unfortunately.
I had ruled out OPTs owing to cost, but may have to revisit that. My husband won't let me buy such things on line as he works for a pharmaceutical company and thinks that they're dodgy.
May just end up using my Persona in reverse and hoping for the best.
The reason I'd left off that, though (and just covering the right sort of time period) was that I thought it would be just one more stress. But maybe I'm going to have to, now.
Thanks all for the support, especially when I know I don't count as the 'should be worried' category yet.
--------------------
"Who'll be the lady, who'll be the lord, when we are ruled by the love of one another?"
Posts: 2063 | From: Huddersfield | Registered: Jul 2003
| IP: Logged
|
|
Lamb Chopped
Ship's kebab
# 5528
|
Posted
The first thing they did with me was to require several months of the BBT charts. So if there's anyway you can swing it with the cats, it might be worthwhile, so that if and when you do wind up going in, you've saved yourself a bit of time.
Another thing that might possibly be worth doing would be to have your husband see a urologist / andrologist and do a "just-in-case" sperm analysis, which is the first step for guys. (Your own gynecologist can also order this test for him, in my experience.) I don't think this is hugely expensive, and if there is an issue on his side, this would probably bring it to light right away. In my experience they want repeats on that, too, just in case things change, so again you're saving yourself a bit of time (and impatience) if you handle it now on a "just in case" basis.
All that said, you're right in thinking that it'll probably all turn it just fine. But I was always the type that wanted to grab a potential problem by the throat and shake it to death ASAP. ![[Biased]](wink.gif)
--------------------
Er, this is what I've been up to (book).
Oh, that you would rend the heavens and come down!
Posts: 20059 | From: off in left field somewhere | Registered: Feb 2004
| IP: Logged
|
|
Lamb Chopped
Ship's kebab
# 5528
|
Posted
And on my part... Would you folks spare a prayer for me, as I try to lose weight so that we can try again? I dare not get pregnant at my present weight due to gestational diabetes and other problems with our first. Yet I'm running out of time here, and it really needs to be this year. And it's so hard.
--------------------
Er, this is what I've been up to (book).
Oh, that you would rend the heavens and come down!
Posts: 20059 | From: off in left field somewhere | Registered: Feb 2004
| IP: Logged
|
|
kentishmaid
Shipmate
# 4767
|
Posted
Well, if they want charts, we're probably stuffed. Our door won't shut properly and I can't see my husband not letting the cats in. Just going to have to hope we're in that 15% who manage it in around the 10 - 12 month mark.
Good luck with losing weight - I hope you it shifts quickly and that you fall pregnant just as speedily!
--------------------
"Who'll be the lady, who'll be the lord, when we are ruled by the love of one another?"
Posts: 2063 | From: Huddersfield | Registered: Jul 2003
| IP: Logged
|
|
Lamb Chopped
Ship's kebab
# 5528
|
Posted
Thanks very much. In my case, though, it's going to require the highest of the high ART. ![[Razz]](tongue.gif) (This is as close as I can come to a "bleahhh!" smiley.)
You know, I really don't think having cats jump on you is going to be a problem, as long as you can restrain yourself from getting involved in an energetic response. It's your muscle movement, not theirs, that would be a problem. But maybe I'm not visualizing things correctly here.
--------------------
Er, this is what I've been up to (book).
Oh, that you would rend the heavens and come down!
Posts: 20059 | From: off in left field somewhere | Registered: Feb 2004
| IP: Logged
|
|
chukovsky
Ship's toddler
# 116
|
Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Lamb Chopped:
The first thing they did with me was to require several months of the BBT charts. So if there's anyway you can swing it with the cats, it might be worthwhile, so that if and when you do wind up going in, you've saved yourself a bit of time.
Another thing that might possibly be worth doing would be to have your husband see a urologist / andrologist and do a "just-in-case" sperm analysis, which is the first step for guys. (Your own gynecologist can also order this test for him, in my experience.) I don't think this is hugely expensive,
Things don't work quite the same this side of the pond. Women don't have "their own gynaecologist" and short of spending £££ going private, men wouldn't be off to see a specialist on their own either - for the majority of us, the GP is the first port of call for everything, and the only port of call for most things - they would order, and review, the first round of tests, unless you are like me and older and they don't want to waste time doing that.
No-one's ever asked me for any BBT charts but if you can manage just one or two months (and you can take it at 4am or 5am if that's your regular waking time - the cats will just have to be patient while you wait for the thermometer for 30 seconds) you can see if the second half of the cycle is doing what it should i.e. have you actually ovulated. I used to have a temperature-taking machine that said you had to have had 4 hours' sleep and have been in bed for the last hour, or something like that - and it seemed to work quite well for me, even though I do tend to wake up at odd hours, I just took it anyway.
OPKs are less than £1 each on line. But Persona does the same thing - have a look at the sticks themselves as if you are getting two thick lines early in the cycle that could indicate too much LH, and you can also then see when/if the LH surge happens each month, is it regular, and how many days you have between that and the end of the cycle. All useful information.
At your age, the most likely scenario is they will start doing tests after 1 year but then will want you to wait till it's been 2 years (and IIRC 50% of those who don't conceive in a year, but have no identifiable cause, will conceive in the second year) until they start doing anything drastic.
You have loads of time for two or even five children. Don't panic! All those helpful people will say "just relax". Not very helpful in getting pregnant, but very helpful in not feeling so bad about not getting pregnant.
--------------------
This space left intentionally blank. Do not write on both sides of the paper at once.
Posts: 6842 | From: somewhere else | Registered: May 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
chukovsky
Ship's toddler
# 116
|
Posted
P.S. - I'm off to the hospital again on Thursday for an ovarian scan - and they are doing some more tests on both of us... results theoretically back at the start of April, when we have an appointment to see the consultant, but I am going to see if they might manage to give us the bare bones before that.
--------------------
This space left intentionally blank. Do not write on both sides of the paper at once.
Posts: 6842 | From: somewhere else | Registered: May 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
kentishmaid
Shipmate
# 4767
|
Posted
Good luck with the scan! I hope all goes well and that you get everything you're dreaming of.
I may well just go with the Persona, but for now I've decided that a regime of rest, relaxation, good food, exercise and positive thinking will do for the next couple of months. I'm allowing myself one small glass of wine per day, too, as I'm fed up of feeling deprived and will just see what happens.
--------------------
"Who'll be the lady, who'll be the lord, when we are ruled by the love of one another?"
Posts: 2063 | From: Huddersfield | Registered: Jul 2003
| IP: Logged
|
|
Matrix
Shipmate
# 3452
|
Posted
The waiting lists for urologists can be very long on the NHS, and the people in the queue in front are likely to be older chaps waking up several times a night in pain needing to pee.
I paid and went private, hated doing it, went against some deeply held principles, but was finally swung by my GP saying "Matrix, next wednesday the dr will be at the clinic, he'll either be seeing you or playing golf on the putting green out the back, he won;t be seeing nhs patients, you're not stealing anyone's place"
For the first test for men he could have thgis done immediately by almost any fertility clinic, even without referral. It's worth doing as if that is the problem there are some things that can be fixed, and other things that can't so you might find out immediately that you can't have kids naturally barring a regenerative miracle.
Send him for a test, and wait a while before you see the gp otherwise.
M
--------------------
Maybe that's all a family really is; a group of people who miss the same imaginary place. - Garden State
Posts: 3847 | From: The courts of the King | Registered: Oct 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
kentishmaid
Shipmate
# 4767
|
Posted
Hmm. I've been trying to persuade him just to register with the GP for a year and a half, so I'm not sure how far I'll get, but I may well have a go.
However, so far this relaxation business is lovely. Just come out of a rose scented bath and feel very calm. Hopefully this will continue over the next few months!
--------------------
"Who'll be the lady, who'll be the lord, when we are ruled by the love of one another?"
Posts: 2063 | From: Huddersfield | Registered: Jul 2003
| IP: Logged
|
|
chukovsky
Ship's toddler
# 116
|
Posted
If he'll go along with you to the gynae/GP (tell him you need your hand held) he may well just get Told Here's A Pot Go And Get On With It And Here's Where You Take It. And, indeed, to register on his way out.
Sorry, sweetest.
--------------------
This space left intentionally blank. Do not write on both sides of the paper at once.
Posts: 6842 | From: somewhere else | Registered: May 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
Bronwyn
Shipmate
# 52
|
Posted
--------------------
Fragile X syndrome is part of our lives. Someone I love makes me proud who has this syndrome. I love you Miriam.
Posts: 1221 | From: Melbourne (Australia) | Registered: May 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
chukovsky
Ship's toddler
# 116
|
Posted
Had a scan last week on my ovaries, all is shiny and well and no cysts (I didn't think there were but one of the many consultants was Just Checking). I was told I should ring the medical secretaries to see if the test results were back... but no answer every time I try. Hmph.
--------------------
This space left intentionally blank. Do not write on both sides of the paper at once.
Posts: 6842 | From: somewhere else | Registered: May 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
Printer-friendly view
